All Comments on 'Long after the Game Ch. 04'

As many have already said this current version of Ryan (LONG AFTER THE GAME) seems to be a significantly different with respect his personality and Mental thought process when compared to the Ryan from the original story (LIVE FROM THE GAME).

If you slow down and think about it it becomes pretty clear what the author is trying to do. Jezzaz is trying to show how the the lying .. cheating ...the betrayal has impacted Ryan in very deep but subtle ways. From my perspective it seems that this author's attempt to show Ryan has undergone significant changes... has worked. BUT there is also a price to pay it b cause it makes Ryan *** SEEM ** docile and wimpy and implies that he has become kind of pushover.

This is why so many readers have complained over the last few chapters the new Ryan is coming across as a wimp or a very different type of personality. The problem is that most of anonymous readers are not that insightful... so they may be missing what the author is trying to do here.

Then there are few of the really stupid readers out there who argue that Trey is right -- that Ryan has become a smug self righteous asshole. The problem with that argument is that it assumes that ALL MEN should not have ANY emotional trouble or reaction when their wives are engaged in a massive conspiracy to cheat and fuck other men for a prolonged period of time.

It is actually a form of reverse sexism which is standard fare that in serious and powerful LW stories.... that after the marriage end... it is always the wife that goes through prolonged hysterical crying .... depression and suicidal thoughts and lots of support from different people. The ex husband? Who gives a FUCK what he is going through? He's just an knuckled dragging subhuman man right ? He is not allowed to have any motions are have any impact in a long-term.... right?

It's ironic because from what we know of Trey and his previous marriage .... he has been emotionally scarred by how his marriage ended. If anyone should have some sympathy with Ryan ... it shoukd be Trey. Of course Trey is is clearly in love with Deanna so since he is thinking with his dick... he isnt thinking at all.

Finally the inability of Deanna to comprehend how other people are seeing her plan/ cheme to get Ryan back ... is a very strong warning sign that she still has serious issues to be resolved.

If her entire life to plan is to get her husband back... then she should not be going on "dates" even to Charity events... with other men. It's not wrong that DNA is doing this with th Trey... what is bothersome is that she does understand even for one second how this MIGHT look from Ryan's Perspective

Harryin VA

(it is 2am and the last paragraph is badly garbled )

If her entire life to plan is to get her husband back... then she should not be going on "dates" even to Charity events... with other men. It's not wrong that Deanna is doing this with Trey...

what is bothersome is that she does understand even for one second how this MIGHT look from Ryan's Perspective

First off, this section sort of redeemed Ryan for me. In prior chapters, the tone you gave him was extremely close to milk sop. Every gurgle in his mind (and wading through his stream of consciousness thoughts brings 'gurgle' to mind at times) screamed ineffectual

(Oh...sorry...I was actually trying to be complimentary...what was I saying again? Cow!)

But here, his distance showed through a lot more. He isn't a wimp...well, not ONLY a wimp. Mostly wimp. A 'depth charge' of wimp. The image I got in the first section of this story was Deanna actually having to DRAG him up Mt. Reconciliation (not sure how that works, but yeah). He is being a hell of a lot cooler about this than he previously let on.

*

How the hell does a man married for 18 years still get embarrassed about buying underwear? How the hell did he do emergency tampon runs? Sack up or back up, Jack!

Mostly wimp.

**

I thought you had this grand insight into her sexuality when he noted HE was not turning her crank, it was the situation turning her crank. I wonder if you are going to revisit this. Not sure I would have stayed.

***

I have daughters Paula's age. Guess what? They don't talk like her.

This 'too cool for school' attitude of Paula is getting a bit trope laden. Just a style thing.

****

Paula is correct to call her dad out.

*****

Wow! Trey actually redeemed himself quite a bit here! And Mae is frigging useless. And Deanna gained some points in LV...and promptly lost them all about the charity dinner. She just bulled forward without a bit of thought.

I am fully engaged here.

Thrown off a little by this one. Not sure how to take it. Being a cynic I am wondering what Trey's game is. Her complete disregard for what dating others would mean to Ryan right now is still wrong but not out of character. Still compartmentalizing. I guess she stopped therapy a little early...

When you're right, you're right. Couldn't find a wrong thing in you comments. I would only add that Deanna's lack of comprehension about the need to inform her ex about her plans to manipulate him back into her life, the fact that she had to be told to be honest and that her reason for doing so wasn't about it being right but about trying to avoid a bad outcome in her getting what she wanted, well that really made it obvious that she continues to be a person for whom "what I want" is more important than "do the right thing".

Even if she succeeds in getting her ex back, she still hasn't changed her internals. The same thing shows in her decision to "date" Trey. Not her going to the charity ball, but that she doesn't even think about other folks feelings about it (either her ex's or Trey's). The fact that she is using Trey and doesn't care enough to notice he's in love with her is very telling about how little she has changed from the woman that thought it was o.k. to cheat.

Deanna lives for showtime. She was pleased as punch to be on Wrigley Field jumbotron with boyfriend until that went bad. Now the stage was Vegas. Look she loves her kids and even Ryan ( like a brother ) . But Ryan isn't built to be her partner in these forays. These two are ill-matched and long term reconciliation is a pipe dream. Fob her off on Trey. He's a glutton for her drama. Just my opinion.

In my opinion reconciliation at this point would seem not to be possible,if she goes to this charity with Trey all bets are off,it has allso become obvious that Trey has feelings for Deanna and maybe Trey is a better choice to the new Deanna,who knows except the author ? Anyway going to the charity is very naive on her part wich she is not

I was losing hope in this series, but this seems to be a positive turn. I will comment though that I am not a fan of the vegas scene. She decided it would be a good idea to re-create the behavior / style she *found* with her lover and share that with her husband? Nothing like shoving that in his face. What's he supposed to think - if he doesn't like it, she's going to do it anyways?

Thanks again for writing.

Curious. She's pushing too hard. Ryan is all fucked up. Especially since he's met her advisor. My guess is that she's going to blow it in the end. I guess we'll find out...

Both Ryan and Trey are sorry excuses for men.

Ryan needs to grow a pair and just dump the selfish, conniving bitch and move on. All her "just for you talk" is just talk. What she really means in "just for you, until I get what I want then I will do what I please." Ryan should not want her, doesn't need her, could never trust her to be anything but selfish.

Trey is simply a natural born cuck who will gladly let Deanna take him to the next level, putting up with all her shit.

Deanna tells Ryan:

"I want to do things only with you. Not with anyone else."

Then goes on a date with Trey.

There is manipulation that is seduction.

But then there is manipulation that is deception, manipulation that is duplicity.

More and more this appears to be Deanna wanting to return to the way things were, including her extramarital fun and games.

And never mind what Ryan feels or wants.

There is an element of stupidity to this plot:

1. Why would anyone want a cheating wife back after a divorce? What is the benefit? Think about all the deficits:

A. She doesn't love you, that is by the definition of love, caring about another person. Her actions were not only uncaring, they were hurtful. So, love is off the table.

B. She doesn't love the kids. See A.

C. Her actions are not sane or rational. Who needs to be in a relationship with a nut?

D. He knows nothing of her personal life. She is dating another man, Platonic or not. She hangs around with recovering cheating sluts and her job is still a mystery. A mystery that could easily fit into the life of a call girl, or a sex addict.

E. In fact, they share very little of the everyday lives with each other, that is the meat of most relationships.

F. Ryan, Paula was right when she called him out on his actions. He was not loving towards his own family. He did not protect them. They suffered. Perhaps it was necessary, perhaps not. Still he didn't even think about their pain. It was understandable, and forgivable but he is kind of stupid too.

The writing is great. The only trouble is the above and the length of time it is taking to get to the punchline. It has been like holding my face against a belt sander, I am down to the bone and I am starting to tire of waiting for some kind of revelation.

I dont know about this anymore.

If you can remember,she told us that when she finished her affair-her lover is going back to Phily she will maybe find another lover because she just dont know where she stands any more. And if she was not caught this will be going on and on.

And this Vegas trip,Ryan is so dumb,doing things with "his wife" just because she have then with his lover and SHE WANTS to live that over and over again.

Then she went to another date with Trey.

Please let him run away from this,maybe Melisa can love him.

The show is getting better. Deanna's inability to have a sense of how others view events may just tip the scales against her. I thought Evan might get a little suspicious by her aggressive actions in Vegas. And, Lewis want's her!

Great story

Thanks.

Looks like this is heading for disaster. Shame it could have made a great reconciliation. Oh well it is your story I guess.

The story is okay. Its brilliantly written. I loved the line:

"Trust me. She asked me to trust her. And I did. But I didn't. I mean, I could, but I couldn't – or maybe I should, but maybe I shouldn't. This was troubling. "

I think that that's exactly the way we think when confronted with stuff we want, but don't know if we should.

And -finally- a good sex scene.

that I`ve read on Lit., this is one of the very few where I find I really care what happens to the characters. Jezzaz`s writing is superb - I particularly like the little asides- and I was betting that Deanna would have a fling with Trey and that would finish it with Ryan.. Now right at the end of chapter 4 we have a `confrontation` if it can be called that between the two men. If I was Ryan, Deanna would still have a long way to go. But we`ll see, we`ll see ! I can hardly wait !

get on with it. have Trey and Deanna have a spontaneous moment and fall in love. Let Ryan be crushed again. But please find him a trustworthy soul mate.

In the first story, I kind of liked Ryan. Here, not so much. A man can be emotionally shattered, but still move on. This version of Ryan is far too willing to have no control of his life. He's void of feelings. He sometimes reacts, but he never acts. Taking Deanna back would be better for this Ryan because he's such an empty vessel that anything would be an improvement. Indecision can last a few days, or a few weeks, but for years? He isn't coming across very well and we have been given no reason why she wants him back. She's in her prime and he's a slob, physically and mentally. I am liking the wife better than Ryan at this point. At least she makes decisions and acts.

Except " to a guy who had his eyes out on storks"? Eyes on on storks? Don't storks bring babies and stalks support eyes?

Too many authors seem to think hat being a victim means the cheated on husband ca do anything in retaliation and it doesn't.

As for adultery being unforgivable? Really? If its unforgivable, then you can't forgive. Ever. The kids seem to have forgiven her and considering my mom cheated on her husband, my father and I still lived with her....adultery isn't unforgivable. And does a 15 yr old know about forgiveness?

Jezzaz threw a few below the belt curveballs that has changed some things and left others alone.

Someone commented on Ryan's don't care attitude-it's come back to bite him.

I was right about Trey getting screwed over by Deanna. She's steamrolling along with her eyes on her task and is unwittingly(?) hurting Trey. At the same time her behaviour has set things into motion that aren't going to work well for her.

The kid doesn't act her age, my eldest was like that as well-she became a psychologist.

I am disappointed in one thing and that was in hoping that Deanna's sister would kind of step in and form some sort of relationship with Ryan. Oh well...That can be the grist for a future series. I don't see either Deanna or Ryan successfully getting back together. They may have feelings for each other but that lack of trust is a dealbreaker.

As an aside to Sugna

Why would anyone want a cheating wife back after a divorce?

I don't know.

Why would anyone want a cheating husband back after a divorce?

I knew a couple here in Tokyo, they could never stay faithful to the other, the husband killed several of her lovers(he had an alibi), she poisoned 1 of his(got off on a technicality), in the end they divorced 6 times and married 7 times.

This story is strange and so is RL.

It's good that Ryan is getting off his ass - her cheating and quest to get him back doesn't excuse his ambivalence forever considering at minimum they have kids together. However i was not expecting that Trey scene at all and i was expecting Mae to back off quickly i was still hoping for her to push Deanna a bit more rather then a one-liner.

Curious how you're going to resolve the kinda-sorta love triangle.

This story has become one of those books that you get started on, then find you don't really care about the characters as much as you would like, so you just skip to the end. I read the beginning of this fourth installment, then jumped to the end of it and don't feel like I missed anything important.

Trey wants him to shit or get off the pot. (Esther take her back or let him try) now I feel Trey feels he is free to make his move. He will be caught and Ryan will say good rid dens to both of them. I think if he is going to take her back it will be from the conversation with his daughter. It will be an interesting last chapter.

You have me engaged enough to get me out of bed at 7am on a Saturday to read an online story. I don't know what to say about this one. I was correct that Ryan is more on top of the situation than some predicted. I agree that we got our first hot sex of the story. It was interesting that it was only now that Ryan was confronted by his responsibility for the children's trauma with the video board incident.

Now, what to make of Trey? Does Ryan decide that the best he can manage long term is a friendly coparenting relationship with Deanna and leave her to someone else that cares about her, or does Trey's intervention push him to decide that he wants Deanna in his life?

Deanna was less task oriented and more emotionally engaged in this chapter. I felt that her actions were less about the task and challenge but more about love and really trying to build something meaningful in this chapter.

Now what? Stay tuned for our next episode--Same Bat Time! Same Bat Channel!

I guess I was open for the reconciliation that never happened in DSQ's WWWM which was referenced in the story. It would have been great if Ryan worked on himself the way the Maitland did in that story. He would have welcomed Deb back if she had made a third of the effort that Deanna has done in this story. The problem that I have is that both Ryan and Deanna are two selfish characters who are incapable of seeing how their actions affect others most importantly their children. In this chapter Paula finally gets Ryan to understand that exposing her mother to the world as a cheater would blow back on the kids. Ryan might not think of this while he is in revenge mode but how can this be a revelation nearly two years later? Trey is right: Ryan is an asshole (and Trey may be a cuck). Ryan's side of the conversation after the Vegas sex was weak. Deanna spent a fortune on him, gave him the only sex he's had since the divorce and he's got nothing. If he was so damaged by her infidelity you would think ED would have prevented him from preforming as he thought about what she did with others.

Deanna is a mystery. She is a woman on a mission but what happens if she achieves her goal? Will she get her family back and then go seeking the excitement she can't get from Ryan. If I were Ryan, I'd be wondering how she knew so much about Vegas and how many times she has engaged in public exposure. Deanna would be a good employee but isn't wife material. She cheated on Ryan because she was tired of being a wife/mother. She is doing ok living the single life and visiting her kids. I still can't get over her lack of significant contact with Ryan for 18 months after the divorce despite living in the same area and trading the kids. I can't tell if the author is being honest with us about her sex life. She is the kind of person who would get off on zipless sex. I could see her going out to the clubs every weekend and fucking strange men in semi-public places. She has the mentality of an escort; its only sex no love. Now that she is single she could do that. Her relationship with Trey is a mystery. It seems they never had sex and she only see's him as a friend; clearly he wants more. Not clear from this story timeline if the dinner where she was going to be his escort has already occurred or if Ryan is going to discover it.

You only have one chapter left and a lot of work to do. Thank you for your effort and supplying a chapter a day. You have lots of us following the story; poor HIV was up till 2 am waiting for this installment. Is Trey's story one of the ones in you hopper? I'd like to find out what happened to his marriage and how he and Deanna got together.

reasonable man

“but I was sure I wasn't hefting my side of it.” – And why SHOULD you? SHE’S the one who cheated, SHE’S the one trying to win YOU back, you shouldn’t have to work for it!

He feels like he shouldn’t trust her, and he’s RIGHT! He should trust his gut!

“But I found that I really get off in...potentially discoverable situations." – Wasn’t that in her journal and/or the video?

“I did something pretty fucking terrible and we've never really talked about it. The thing is, Ryan, I don't even know where to start that conversation.”

Um, wouldn’t it have been better to have more counseling? The both already spoke to her counselor separately, maybe some joint sessions, where a TRAINED counselor could guide the process, where she would have to worry about how to “throttle” this?

“to a guy who had his eyes out on storks” – Uh? Do you mean eyes on STALKS? Because “storks” are birds!

“She was just lost in lust and it did pass through my brain that at that precise moment, it may not have mattered who was fucking her.” – Bingo! Just keep that in mind and you’ll be okay.

"I'll bet you've been waiting all day to use that." – THAT’S kind of snippy, she’s hardly in a position to be making snarky comments!

Okay, Trey – I believe it’s obvious to most, if not all, of us that Trey wants Deanna. Having said that, I believe his advice has been overall pretty good, like here, where he criticizes how it’s all about what Deanna wants done, not how RYAN feels.

“We are divorced, he doesn't get to dictate my life." – I may be mis-remembering, but I think this is at least the second time she has made a remark like this. SHE’S the one who wants Ryan to take her back, she HAS to take what he thinks about what she does more into consideration! I appreciate that Mae is trying to warn her, but I think she could be a little more forceful, remind her that in a way Ryan DOES dictate her life if she really wants him back into it! And Mae is obviously reading Trey’s signals even if Deanna isn’t, and should probably warn her about THAT as well.

Well, I certainly wasn't expecting such openness from Trey! First, I think he is wrong, Ryan is the wronged party here, and he doesn't have to do ANYTHING! Next, Trey should be more honest with Deanna, and let her know that he wants her. Even though I believe that most, if not all, of his advice has been pretty good, Deanna should know the source, and be able to evaluate it from that perspective. Plus, if Trey is anywhere near as good a guy as I think he may be, maybe Deanna will realize she doesn't have to crawl back to Ryan and can move on, freeing RYAN to move on!

Wow, you and I seem to be pretty much on the same wave length!

We both caught his thought about how it didn’t seem to matter WHO was fucking her.

While I wouldn’t exactly call Mae “useless”, I certainly agree that she should have been more forceful in calling Deanna out, and letting her know about the signals that Trey was sending out.

And we also see the contradiction between her campaign to win Ryan back and her lack of concern about her “dates”, and despite my quotes, they ARE dates!

"You just want to pay the fine and go home.." he said. Exactly! This woman has no remorse. Granted she is clear eyed and single minded but does anyone imagine she gives a shit about whatshisname. And he is a complete whatshisname. Dumb bastard deserves everything he gets.

Five stars for this chapter. The conversation with the daughter was very well written in my opinion, a quick, insightful broadside from her point of view. But, how could he not have understood the impact on the children, particularly at school. OK, rhetorical question, he is badly hurt and not as in tune with reality as he should be.

The conclusion of this chapter is good. Trey forcing himself into the picture and making it clear that he has feelings for Deanna. Don't know where you are going to take the story from here. Seems pretty clear that Deanna does not have feelings for Trey and sees him as a friend. So, even if Ryan discovers that she acts as his "date" at events, will he even care? Even if Ryan rejects the "plan" and Deanna, why would she suddenly turn to Trey for comfort and affection?

One little flaw to comment on. Paula stated that she had "to deck" three people over the jumbo-tron issue. Hard to believe that the school did not get involved with those little imbroglios.

I believe that the two main characters would have been better cast if this was a completely separate story. Call it something else and change the characters names. Ryan in this story is someone different than the person the character in "Live form the Game".

The first story Ryan was the hero who suffered and acted (Maybe foolishly but he was a person of action.) In this story he is just reacting to the ex-wife (Being lead by the ring in his nose if you will).

GIVE ME THE MAN OF ACTION and let this character die or have a bus run over him. (I want my hero back.)

Deanna is obviously turning tricks in her "convention booth babes" business.

And Trey is an annoying wussy. Maybe he should just admit he's gay.

NOW the story is taking a good turn and adding a little actual intrigue!

Me likey!

I agree with Harry. Mostly. I agree with him about Deanna. She is still seeing things through Deanna shaded lenses. Everything so far has been about what SHE wants and how to get the life that SHE wants. She is trying to get Ryan to come around to her side of the table instead of trying to find a way back to each other. She hasn't stopped to think about what it is that RYAN wants. She has to be told by a group of people to even consider him. Her "dates" with Trey and her reaction to others questioning it show that.

However, this doesn't make her a bad person. This makes her like most people. More often than not, people think about how situation affect them, not how they affect the situation. Of course when in a marriage this isn't acceptable, but it still happens. Most times, people outgrow this behavior. She seems to have not. This isn't uncommon with attractive people. People who have the world bend over backwards for them because of their looks usually don't recognize that they think this way until they run into a situation where they are FORCED to think about others. C'est la vie.

I do disagree with Harry about Ryan though. He is smug. He is self righteous. Yes he was cheated on. Yes he was walked over. But he has laid down and is playing the victim. He has given her control of his life and emotions. Getting revenge on her was not him taking back his power. It was him acting out because he was hurt. His revenge was all about HER, not HIM. That is why revenge is such a useless waste of time. Spreading the hurt does not relieve your own. In fact, it simply exacerbates it. Taking your power back is moving forward, one step at a time, and trying to figure out what your power is.

Right now he is using her as a crutch. He is letting her make all of the decisions because he is too weak to simply shit or get off of the pot. He can tell her he forgives her and to move on with her life at any point. But right now he is too weak to do that . He can tell her that he is willing to try to work it. Still, he is too weak to do that. Instead, he is taking the easy road and playing the poor hurt victim. Poor Ryan.

Great story by the way. Can't wait for tomorrow.

nothing new for me. she is still dating trey. while trying to convince this sad little loser of an ex to take her back. one thing i would like to say. no women is clueless about what men think about her. in this story deanna supposedly doesnt know that trey has feelings for her.bullshit. if you ever had a secret crush on a girl. guess what, it was only a secret to you. she and all her friends knew. deanna in real life would know exactly what trey was thinking. now i dont know what the author has planned, so i can only guess as to what a real life deanna would do. i think deanna knows what she is doing with trey is wrong and that is how she is getting her needs fulfilled. its the thrill of doing something wrong that she is after. just like most cheaters.

Clear from shortly after Trey was introduced that HIS rebound is Sweetie. He has established a great base with her ... she is comfortable with him AND pays serious attention to his advice! Much stronger base (IMHO) than physical attractiveness, deep voice, wealth or a big (and skilled) dick.

Trey just torpedoed all of Sweetie's efforts. Seems he considers that Sweetie's plan MIGHT work. Derailing (mixed metaphor) that plan (again IMHO) is just as well, because Sweetie is (as I've previously remarked) just selfish! I almost commented in Ch3 that Hubby's Future Sweetie has been in the story from very early on (pre-Jumbotron!) This certainly got reinforced in this chapter!

Mae is Sweetie's truest friend, except that she is too mild!

5*

saves me from reading the story until the end. If it ends as I suspect I will have saved myself a great deal of anger, angst, and pain.

Deanna will never own the destruction caused by her behavior. It was obvious in chapter 1 of this reboot that she had no remorse, she just wants to get Ryan back on her own terms.

I gather from the comments that Deanne is dating Trey and perhaps others so she still is not committed to the concept of marriage other than Ryan there as a matter of ego.

When it's over I'll read the last page to see if I was wrong. If so I may go back and read the intervening material but it is painfully slow if the first chapter was any indication. If it ends like I project, I won't go back.

jezzaz knows how to turn a phrase and does a good job as a story teller. For me, at least the story isn't worth reading.

The comments have been great,

Start with the comments: Historically I've always thought HIV was harsh, mean, and not very bright. However, his comments on this series are really insightful. Maybe I was wrong. Some of the other comments are insightful as well. HDK I think there was one decisive move when he quit his job of many years and started the new company.

Writing: As somebody commented, the dialogue with his daughter was very well written. Series very well written.

Plot: I think I'd point out to the ex that Trey really loves her. Then SHE'D have a decision to make. Perhaps that is where Author J is going. Wouldn't be so many comments if the plot wasn't as compelling as it is. For fun I re-read the last chapter of the original - really like the Jumbotron thing and Ryan's treatment of Crystal.

but the story does seem logical. Looking fwd to tomorrow's closing installment.

Why is she dating Trey, telling him every little detail of her life? This is really getting to be a fucked up story. I agree with other's comment. When Ryan learns of all the 'dates' she's had with Trey, he'll tell her to get lost. She, of course, see's the 'dates' as innocent, but then she's dumber that box of used condoms. She doesn't realize by being emotionally intimate with Trey she's cheating again. Hell I always love a reconciliation when it's warranted, but this stupid bitch needs to be toasted. You're a fine writer and I enjoy your work, but if I've taken the time to read this story to learn she's ended up with Trey...

the story is getting better and better now. now it's coming out that her secret weapon has feelings for her and is tired of being on the side so he goes and pushes the ex. is that good or bad? either way now he has to make a decision on what he wants and not what everyone else wants. he has to decide to let her carry on or call it quits before it goes much farther. great writing.

You made one comment that I do feel I have to respond to.

"I have daughters Paula's age. Guess what? They don't talk like her."

I do too, and mine most assuredly does. She's actually the model for Paula.

In this situation, anecdotal evidence is not permissible as a blanket statement. Who is to say you are 100% right because Your Daughter doesn't talk that way, and mine does?

The character speaking as Trey nails it, you can't just consider this as a set of tasks.

Simply because of the emotion involved and the damage the partner suffered.

Even if you check off all the tasks and do what is 'required" you have no assurance that a new relationship will exist.

With the app or a game, you design the game, write the code, use various "experts' to do stuff you can't and push it out into the world. The app may work., it may do everything you want it to do and yet be a commercial failure because users don't like it or they can't find it - it's lost in the sea of millions of others.

Deanna crossed the Rubicon when she took him to Las Vegas, but we don't think they ever had the conversation about being exclusive and what the sex represented. It was not a reaffirmation of love, but described as "new" memories.

Plenty of foreshadowing about what Deanna's behavior with Trey will look like to Ryan.

We shall see.

had such mixed feelings about a story on this site. As someone said already, this is an OK story with brilliant writing. The whole set-up is too contrived. Yet, all that said, I'm deeply involved and desperately want a reconciliation. The author has very cleverly left things so that it's impossible to tell how everything will turn out. I know it's already written, but I want it to work for a soppy happy ending and I'm afraid it's not going to.

Excuse me. I can only speak from my own experience. One daughter is very modest. One is very mouthy (though STRINGENTLY avoiding anything to do with parental booty slapping)

My distaste is more a function of this literary trope where all kids are incredibly wise and insightful, putting Yoda, Dr. Ruth and Sigmund Freud to shame. Which is not to say children can't have insight. I just seldom hear it on as consistent a basis as one finds it in literature.

You should not take this as a personal slam on your daughter. It was not intended that way.

.......that was an interesting surprise. Not bad, but I didn't see it playing out the way you have presented it. Well done! Another cliffhanger of an ending.

Thank you for sharing your stories with us.

Brujay

Thank you for bringing back the humorous talk and situations. This chapter was almost as funny as the first. The added bonus ,it was shorter.

I like this and am treating it as a new story with different characters. So I award you 3*s.

So does Deanna end up pregnant ? Or Rhonda ? Does Trey sleep with the prostitute ? Who ?

I look forward to the end. Thanks again.

AMerryman

When are you going to put pen to Paper?

as for Ryan I agree with him on Ryan being scarred and tentative, but the last chapter looks like Ryan is getting back into the Game so to speak. It will be interesting to see how it work's out will Deanna's plan's go up in Flame's or will she finally realize how much she damaged not only Ryan but her kids as well.

I put pen to paper 19 times here and have a few MEGS of other genre specific stuff.

Thanks for asking.

My daughter has the same ability to take on a mature veneer and reduce you to a simpering fool when she throws something back at you in a way you've never considered. Dang kids won't let us be the adults!

I must admit I'm vacillating about this story. Part of me wants to BTB but a big part wants them to reconcile. I think I know where it's headed but look forward to the next chapter(s) and the final resolution. I hope it's not going to turn into a 50 chapter story.

Great writing Author!

As she tries to win her husband back , but why is she really accepting a date with Trey and not able to see his infatuation with her. It would not look. Good with Ryan. I would like a reconciliation but I do not see one coming in the way you are writing this now , your last chapter is coming ,I can't wait for the conclusion . Will they be a family again or will he finally move on with his life. Or. Not.

is she on drugs ? he is pushing her away and she is hyper as he would be happy ????

and then showing up like the slut that she is and he has to accept it ??????

he should have walked out that same second.

and then: do things only with you . what walking around naked in public only for him ?? exhibitionism only for him ??? do you know what that word means or are you a basket case ??????????

hey and hubris is a nice word and that's her problem and your , the authors problem as well. you write and write and write and nothing makes sense.

and to make it full a warning from her, I will fuck with other guys just for you and us to make new memories.....

she is a slut who lost all her inhibitions and still needs a save harbour, nice little cucky and the kids, sorry makes no sense at all.

would be the last straw as would have no whore back as my wife

are you a firefighter ? killing a fire with a backfire in this case a slut slutting around ? laughable

oh of course I almost forgot Trey's show down nice, real nice, he gets beaten up because of her, cool just waiting for it. :-)

do you read what you write ???

As expected, new twists and turns. Trust the author. He has stirred the pot enough to keep us all guessing. Great work.

Part 5 is going to be a wild ride, I think?

Why Ryan did not jump on one of those trust me 's I do not understand. Basically she does not really bother to discover if he wants to play. Trey putting in an appearance in his office is a surprise and gives him something to think about. Perhaps he will play Cupid/1

If this tale is going to go according to form, Ryan will find out about her "dates" with Trey and he will end this farce. She has not learned her lesson and furthermore she is integrating her bad habits that got her in trouble into their relationship. Sooner or later she is going to realize that this is not Jordan and she will not want to go back to her "boring" life. If this happens after she lasso Ryan, he is going to be betrayed again. I'm waiting for Trey to use the info he has on her new desires to lure her into his bed. Ryan should take his visit as a warning.

Run. Run as fast as you can in the other direction.

Great story though. I give it a 4...and only because I can see where its going and I don't like it.

The school can only get involved if it happens on school property and is reported or seen.

The police can only get involved if it is reported, and there is still a taboo against being a tattletale.

1. This story should have never been written

2. If written it belongs in another category.

The author had a hit with "Live From the Game" this pissed it away with this trite.

Never EVER trust a cheater. They cheat, it's what they do. They compartmentalize, they push the blame off onto everyone else. They also never stop cheating, it's what they do.

I learned it the hard way. My girlfriend in HS wanted to separate for a few weeks and said she wanted to see other people. Of course, it turns out he ended up with her cherry, something she promised to me, more than once. When I found out from that moment on, I ignored her. I never spoke to her again. Hell, I was even at a party when she was in the backseat of his car getting the hell pounded out of her pussy. She didn't know I was there and was somewhat horrified when she saw the disgusted look on my face.

A few years later, we were thrust into the same job for a while and we hit it off. Tom had cheated on her and even given her the clap. I thought it was hilarious and told her so. She was angry for a while and then put the full court press back on again. Like Ryan, I broke down and we got back together. It seemed like the same love we had before she split with me back in HS. Since Tom, she had been with a couple other guys, she had started to pursue me but I was still giving her the brushoff so she spread her legs for other guys. You know, when you start getting laid, you can't go back to holding hands.

I asked the cunt to marry me. She said yes and was so excited. Plans were made and the countdown started. But then, about 3 months before our wedding, Tom moved back to town. And according to a good friend who worked with him and got to know Tom, he was already fucking my girlfriend again,, even though he knew she was my fiancé. My girl and I were having sex but the minute I heard she was fucking Tom again (everyone in school knew he was hung like a mule), I wasn't going to stick my dick back in that disease infested thing.

I'll be damned if she couldn't understand why I didn't want to have sex with her anymore. She had stopped by and was all over me, probably leaking out his splooge. I had to lie, telling her I'd thrown my low back out and couldn't hardly move. Over the next few weeks, I avoided her while my buddy was hearing more stories from Tom and he even offered to let my buddy watch, he just had to be quiet and not let her know he was there. It was perfect!

He sent pictures to me WHILE he was watching them fuck from a closet. Even sent video. She was nasty and Tom's hard cock was as big as everyone said. No wonder she wanted to ride it so bad and she was on top with everything visible. One time while we were having sex she brought up she would like to try anal sex but was afraid it would hurt, so she would save that 'cherry' for our wedding night. Yeah, the way I saw him lube her asshole up with butter and then sink his cock in, he'd rode it before, multiple times You don't let a cock sink in like that in one stroke and not have done it in the past.

I avoided her for the next 2 1/2 months up to our wedding. Her folks didn't like me and didn't understand why her and Tom had split up in the past. Well, finally the wedding was a week away and she was becoming alarmed that she couldn't contact me. So when I got the really shitty email from her dad, in response I sent back a picture and a copy of the video. All of the sudden, my ex-fiancé wasn't trying quite as hard to get ahold of me. On the video you could hear her telling Tom plainly that she planned to continue after we were married. Now, I'm no tiny dicked guy, at 7 1/2". But Tom had to be 10" if an inch and would pound her until she had dried up and begged him to cum.

My wedding date came and went without another peep from my ex. After that I didn't avoid her anymore, but she was back on my ignore list and I didn't even look at her, let alone speak. It wasn't more than a week later I heard she had moved in with Tom and they were talking marriage. Although we had to work in close proximity to one another, I never again acknowledged her existence, something I knew from when we had reconnected, hurt her deeply.

They got married and I was the only one on staff who refused to sign her card and it didn't go unnoticed by her. She even marched up to my desk and began to verbally berate me for being an asshole. I just picked up my phone and began to order my lunch, without even seemingly noticing her. She stumbled away in tears, but I didn't care in the least.

They were married and went on a 2 week stay in the Caribbean. I thought it was awesome, I liked not having her around. You see, I didn't just fall out of love with her, I literally couldn't bear to be in the same room. She had pictures to show around when she returned and when they were passed to my desk I ignored them. She left them sit on my desk, I suppose until she figured I would look and feel bad, but within a day or so, they were covered in paperwork.

Tom brought her home not only another dose of the clap at the six month mark, but also genital warts and herpes. The clap was taken care of and so was Tom when he was sent down the road by her dad, but the other two stuck around, apparently for life! After that, she had a helluva time trying to hold her head up around me because anytime we were in the same room, I had a smirk on my face! She knew I knew and I knew she knew I knew. It was fantastic! I was fire though when it was found out that it was me that put the pictures of pussies infected with warts and herpes on her desk. Admittedly, it was worth it. One, I smacked her with a cheap one. And two, I didn't have to look at the cheating cunt anymore. Kind of a twofer for me!

I rebounded with a better job, one I'd been looking at anyway. A buddy was starting a business and offered me a percentage if I would work for him for poor wages until he was on his feet. With nothing else to do, I agreed and cut him a check for $25K, my life savings at the time. That gave me 40%, which we reinvested until we were up and running. Within a year we were finally in the black, in two we had increased to taking over $250K per year for our salaries! After 5 years (last year) we were valued at over $22M and still growing. Unfortunately, my buddy found out he had testicular cancer and didn't make it. His wife wanted us to sell and we did, it wasn't the same without him.

So with nine million going to my accountant, I was on my own again. Without work, I was flailing and floundering. My money was invested and I took out only enough to live on, I had bought nice place when we were in business and didn't owe anything. I found my investments had a yearly return of almost $700K, but only took $50K to live on this year.

My ex? When she couldn't even get a date around her, she moved back in with Tom, about 800 miles away. I thought it was apropos, they both had the same diseases.

Me? I've been married for 3 years. My wife and I don't need much, we work around the house and do whatever we want. She isn't demanding except in the bedroom and we are expecting our first child in about 3 months!

I'm just waiting for the end to comment...3* for now...

planning a fuckfest in vegas, flirting around on the dance floor, dressing and acting like a slut... yep that's going to get your ex to forget all about your cheating...

you should have written another story, this denigrates a really good revenge story and at present is rambling along fairly pointlessly and too cutesy to the point of nausea.

I have read all your stories and really enjoyed ALL of them, up until now. This one is just going nowhere, he knows what she's doing, doesn't much care for it, but does or says nothing. At best he starts and allows her to shut him down. I thought for a minute, when you started in to in this chapter, you were going to change things up but it didn't happen. Stop having your main character being just dumb.

I think what is pissing off many of the commentators is that you're not doing a fuck fest and you're not doing a BTB story, you're writing plausible characters, with plausible stories and feelings. A solid 5*

misdirect

misdirect

misdirect

final piece of the emotional puzzle just before the

dramatic ending

based on something not previously known or understood.

i see where this is headed. I think Ryan knows he doesn't love her. Now we will see if Deanna can come to the realization that she can't go back.

five stars. Heartbreaking.

Very entertaining writing, but the guy is just so painful- an emotionally stunted ass of the first order, one who I can't sympathize with. So, if Deanne goes off with Trey, are we supposed to feel sorry for him? Maybe that's the intent, but I tend to need a protagonist that I can respect. And if Trey gets Deanne, is that something we should wish on him? She seems so self centered and controlling. So far as I can guess, there are no winners or happy endings in store here, unless I've been completely snookered. Off to read the finale... 5 stars, btw

Just restoring the comments

Boring as hell. 1* of course.

A lot of writing talent, but Ryan is turning out to be a pussy. The potty mouthed children, the passive husband, the usual spread-the-guilt "counseling" patter put in mouths of his children and the insufferable "Trey", and the unbearable "cuteness" of the cunt's plan all combine to make this a wretched waste of time. The reconciliation seems to be based entirely on what she wants, not on true repentance and respect for her ex. This might delight the ladies who watch LifeTime, but it's terrible plotting.

BUT REALLY BAD EXECUTION. I read 2 of the anonymous comments and I found merit in all of their comments. If you EVER want this story to be taken seriously you need to understand that "Ryan" is in need of knowing that this scheming woman is serious. Her trip to Vegas was showbiz, nothing else. The family trip was FOR HER benefit, not Ryan's... The Vegas one too probably. Time to break out the imagination albeit a little late. As it stands Ryan now has "Trey" in the picture and THAT is situation that could sink this whole sad tale when she decides how to thank Trey for his help!! Bearing in mind that Ryan has now the experience of how devious, untruthful(even by omission!) Deanna can be. I concur with the introduction of the 'spy' train of thought and perhaps that MAY yield results but !!!?

Deanna, your boyfriend dropped by and he’s pissed

I don't get Mae. She is the oldest of the group, hell she started it, and her insights are pointed and right on the money. She even knows she is right. Why is she backing down? Does she have a problem with confrontation? Is she shy, and needs someone to back her up? The other women in the group can't see what she does, though I'm not sure why. It is glaringly obvious that Deanna if fucking up in a lot of ways, and is so self absorbed she can't see it.

Deanna hasn't got a clue, what she is doing. She's so self absorbed, she doesn't care what anyone else wants. She wants her life back. She didn't like her life when she had it. So she gets her life back and she reaches her goal. What's next? Another man, for a challenge. She doesn't seem that intelligent to me. Why did Ryan not tell her in Vegas, she was reliving her days with Jordan and how he felt about that. Mae is as wishy-washy as Ryan. She has the whole thing figured out, but holds back. When Deanna told her she could go out with anyone she wanted, she should have said, "Not if you want your ex-husband back". The one thing that has been consistent is, Deanna never thinks things through. Trey's action didn't make any sense. We know he wants Deanna. But the reason for his visit with Ryan eludes me. My gut tells me Ryan won't even mention the visit, to Deanna.

Just speak your mind!!!

Might get a bit of interest now, but my hopes are not high.

The trajectory this story is on is predictable.

3/5 because u flicked up the interest metre a tad.

Deanna is too self absorbed, for her own good. Ryan, run mate, as fast as u can.

More crap.

Ryan has to end this shit now or she is going to hurt him worse than the first time.

I decided to read comments before I list mine which I’ve never done before, so here it goes.

Trey was dead on. Shit or get off the pot!

All these comments about her are superfluous to what’s happening.

She clearly told him her intent beforehand and he’s treating her like a big joke.

He’s still punishing her but not telling her that.

I’ve not read of any wife being as contrite nor truly seeking forgiveness.

I’m now thinking he may not be worth it.

More homophones pop up.

Bill

I initially had a tremendous amount of empathy and sympathy for Ryan. However as the story has progressed I'd become increasingly disgusted with him. Whatever Deanna may have done and it was truly horrible I believe that she's a police trying to do the right thing now. He's acting like an emotionless robot hes taken and giving nothing and he really does need to go one way or the other. The man is absolutely spineless and a moral respect.

The yellow on the other hand is trifling with tray and the way that looks hypersexual and she doesn't have a clue even though she was worn by one of her friends in our group. It's the same mind said the gardener to deep sher initially and she doesn't see it. She's still looking for that high. Sadly Ryan is not the kind of guy that's gonna give it to her. Also the guy is a pig he doesn't do anything to take care of himself and his protestations that he has no time or total bullshit. He could make a radical change in diet and he could start struck to exercise 2 hours A-day 7 days a week. Everybody's busy hes just making himself so busy he doesn't have to be concerned about taking care of himself and doesn't have to be responsibl.

If I were a woman I would not want to have physical relationship with a guy like him.

Yes no self respect for himself he has no moral courage And at this point hes really being cruel to Diana when I believe at this point she's doing her very best to make amends and try to build in life with him.

I am not excusing her in the least for what she did but the story is moved on from there and the only person that's been Disneyland being about this is Diana.

hicountryrider comments are idiotic! Deanne is a slut. How can a slut change her “spots”! She is still a slut. He saw how she flirted with guys while he went to the bathroom in Vegas. She didn’t send them away like a woman in love with her ex-husband! She kept them at her table until her ex returned. That is not the actions of a reformed slut. Those are the actions of a woman who cheats when her man isn’t looking!

BOOOO! HISSSSSSSSSSSSSS! Fuck off, jezzaz.

LWlurker

Trey is a clever fellow. His observation that Deanna is 'task based' and is treating this whole thing like it needs to get done within a deadline is very astute, bang on the money. So why then, has he got it so bad for Deanna when he knows that she betrayed Ryan so badly, in the exact same way that Trey's ex wife betrayed him, in fact? I wanted to buy him a beer when he made that observation but when he showed at Ryan's office whining like an adolescent schoolgirl I just wanted to clean his clock. What a dumb thing to do!

no, No, NO, NO! A slutty dress is what sluts wear, so do not wear one if you what to look like a slut or be thought of one. However, she did wear a slut dress because she a slut and Ryan should have seen her for that. I also would have thought he would not have banged that night. That was out of character in my opinion, big mistake. I also knew Deanna's male friend Trey have a thing for Deanna long ago. I feel author is manipulating things already written to fit a mapped out storey line that does not fit what some of the characters are. Ready some of the other feedback I think Trey is his own agenda and I feel Ryan is still too apprehensive to put his toe back in the water and hence he would not have banged her.

what a slut and the kids support her.

if the gender roles are reversed and the guy cheats would his kids support him the way they sideline with their mother. such a sexist story.

Hurray for Trey the White Knight! All with good intentions! /sarcasm off

One of the most one-dimensional, transparent characters on a LW story. Sigh

Just dump her cheating ass! She is not a normal wife or Mom, no one wants an exhibitionist wife, especially one that wants to tease other guys after being caught once already. His kids just want a normal life. I really liked the hacking scoreboard at the ball game.

⭐

I love to read your comments guys! As for you one star givers well instead of three I give a five A big finger in the eye to you. Grow up FW

ohhhh hated that last page but kinda expected worse actually I kinda agree with the kid no way to trust her, but the therapy might be effective I just don't think I could ever be that forgiving and once or twice I have been accused of being too forgiving and I don't know about that kind of a kink being something that can work long term

This is just too long now

For me is just like a switch. By the time of the betrayal I would have turn it off and no mater what it would remain off. Sure that for the family and co-parent thing I would open and I would make an effort for the sake of all, but that switch would remain off

Nah. Not buying that he'd even let her around him at all. Let alone a trip to Vegas. Then having her slutty dress up in his face. And have her telling him about her public sex proclivity that she discovered with the other dude whilst cheating...

Sorry that all adds up to a big gigantic failure.

No way this guy goes for it. Not as he had been written before.

She's a whore in his book. A whore that betrayed him horrifically. And he burned her down.

They aren't ever gonna be a thing again. Nor would they even want to be a thing again together.

Lame.

Love the "Man from UNCLE" reference!