All Comments on 'Lyin' Eyes Ch. 01'

Like the start of your story. I like the emotion and the husband's internal struggle.

I look forward to the next chapter.

My Regards

Robert

Please continue the story. I hope the poor husband catch her and leave her with nothing.

looks like the start of a good story. it's a shame it was so short. Some times the short chopped up chapters are distracting. keep it up though.

I will never understand why people do this. Its annoying to take time to read something only to find its not finished, hell its barely started.

If you need help with a story contact a fellow author.

Otherwise at least write a partially complete story.

We are pretty smart out here we can freakin read more then a few hundred words at a time!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A great start if you like slut wifes and cuckold limp-dick wimps. I can't wait for Ch. 02. Maybe the asshole can cry and get drunk. Those things always help a fucked up marriage. And don't forget her fucking his best friend and the asshole can eat his friends cum from his loving wifes well and often used pussy. Often used by everyone but the asshole that is. Oh, and don't forget the forgive and forget part so they can forever be a happy and loving family. Until the cheating bitch gets hot pants again. And she will. To those sick motherfuckers that don't like my comments, fuck you.

Now he needs to get the evidence and get out of the marriage. She obviously doesn't care about him or her daughter anymore. Don't let him be a wimp, there are enough of those stories on this site.

Its a good start I will be waiting for the rest. I am not in to the wimp cuckold thing BUT you story has started good enough to make me want to read more. And that what a writter wants Right

Please don't turn this into a wimp husband/cuckold. Now that he knows, it is time to get the evidence to prove her cheating. Then divorce her, and keep his daughter. Maybe the mother will regret her actions once she loses her family, maybe not. He will be better off without his cheating wife.

We have been blessed lately with several capable new authors on Literotica! This has my interest, but I still suggest authors post longer segments, even the entire story, when possible. It was very well written, but the reader is left with no clue as to where it is going. That might keep interest for a while, but please deliver the story and let us read it while we are still interested. Again, it is very well written.

Excellent start, good tease to get us interested in the rest of your story. Please don't break it up into a lot of parts though. Feel free to ignore the dumbasses like "Anonymous in USofA". They haven't even read the story yet and they want to already act like an idiot.

A good tight start on this story.

To the jerk who is criticizing this as "another wimp asshole story" or whatever stupid way he phrased it, and who says 'fuck you" to people that don't like his ugly mouth---and it is adolescent and ugly---finished high school sure but probably in the lower half of his class---GIVE THE WRITER A CHANCE. Yeah, there are a lot of stupid wimp stories with less than real people in them. There may be some cuckhold wimps out there in this world but I don't think many women would be interested in a relationship with them in the first place.

The husband in this story seems like a normal guy. Loves his daughter, does or did love his wife. He isn't just being passive as was the case in the original "Laws of the Heart". Let's see where the story goes. Hopefully there will be ingenious plot twists.

Sometimes the anguish in stories is like squeezing a sponge, every tear must be gotten out for the effect. It gets tedious if done with a heavy hand. A good writer will get us empathizing with the protagonist. The start to this is good.

What mother could be separated from her 3 yr. old daughter for even a couple of days and not give her any attention when she comes home? This character is already shed in a bad light. Are there no redeeming qualities for Laura? I hope so. I will be looking for a twist in this story.

Perhaps Laura is seeking to have another baby, but wants a husband that is not a wimp? I have graded you low on this story, but then I don't know what it is like to be a natural daddy with my low sperm count condition.

intended reality and your skill of presentation. Please don't let the well meaning impatient affect your overall plans and disregard those that prematurely assume the worst wimpy male. This as the buck stops at your keyboard and if there will be success, failure or a learning and growing let it be to your patient standard and not to anyone elses.

Quite a remarkable start by a new talented author who sees the emotional aspects of marital consequence as a way of entertainment. There is here the indication of probable acceptable lifelike reality for the readers but as he and we know the flavors are varied and extreme - from wimpy to mayhem (self cuckolding or acceptance of cuckolding to maiming or murdering). As such, many are emotionally charged and hopeful for thier view of justice but must wait and ponder the possibilities with apprehensions. The theme also envelopes the few jaded humiliation sicko's who want the opposite of the seminatural crowd.

There's the appeal - the unknown. It can be gripping but difficult for readers but especially for authors. It challenges authors as reader expectations mirror the fear or experience already gone through by many.

It is puzzling why more authors don't seize this opportunity for the passion of writing something of lifelike reality which can include erotic sensualness. Personal or nearby experiences abound don't they!

Lastly, a thought expressed often here is the tease of short chapters or the pain of many chapters. A short story is felt to be as or more difficult than a long one. Meaningful conciseness seems to be a craft learned by experience. I suggest that we need to forgive the learning. Accept that reader support, appreciation and author pride are the only true objectives of a well meaning and sincere author. Also of true concern is reader time, attention span and more importantly author time to create continued diligent focus to deliver the product as originally intended and to his or her standards.

Here I suggest that you can't write on the fly or react to the impulse to stretch the plot. It seems that a maximum of 5 or 6 chapters of 2 to 3 pages each appears best in this venue. To make the work easier and better it appears that most good authors have an outline of the plot and a good editor to help them. It seems best to complete the work for better or worse before submitting it. Focus and track don't suffer that way nor does time line frustration to get it done happen.

Gosh, sorry author - just trying to be constructive - I do want to say that you are appreciated for your imagination, talent and time. The theme of marital cheating and the consequence that life extracts can be compelling and can be entertainingly realistic! Lets see where you take us - with Regard

For all of those who wished I hadn't posted only the one chapter, please be patient. I actually sent all four chapters to the website in one afternoon and I didn't know they wouldn't be posted all at once. Having learned how things work here at Literotica.com, next time I'll send whole stories in one posting. My mistake--I apologize.

Your first story has a very nice start to it. Can't wait for the next chapter!! I know Lit. holds them a long time sometimes. I can't wait to see if he catchs her and buries her if she is a whore that it sounds like she is. Please don't make the mana a wimp or a cucker! Thanks V

Mommy's in deep doo-doo & is completely clueless. But not for long. Curious to see how you handle this; very good start. Laura's coming off as a bad "guy" at the start. Looking forward to the pay-back already. How can this Mother be so cold & uncaring to her 3 year-old?

Let me second Harddaysknight's praise at this submission. We really appreciate good stories from good writers (Troub, pat51, K.K., ohio). You might even get an intelligent comment or two; just remember these are your stories. We're just along for the ride.

Great story so far. Though it's the first where I've ever seen the wife and mother act this way to one of the children. Especially when the child is so young. I did like how the daughter was writen. Usually kids are very straight forward in what they say and how they observe things, so much so that it really does make you start to think about things around you, as is the case here.

Clearly the wife is in the wrong. The husband loves the daughter and I get the feeling that while pleading with her he'll notice that the wife doesn't care about anyone but herself. Not even her own child. If this is four chapters, I hope the husband and daughter can find happyness at the end. It seems the wife/mother doesn't care anymore. While he's gathering evidence, I hope he meets someone else that the daughter starts to bond with.

No wait, I do remember a story like this. Where the husband did meet someone a person with horses, where his twin boys(extremely young, like the age of the daughter here) bonded with her and the mother didn't even bother to visit them but wanted her own life without them or the husband. I wonder if this will be similar. That was a good story as well, though I forget who wrote it since it's been a while and I have far to many bookmarks. :)

The start is very promising.

I am happy the author has finished and submitted the entire story and realized the effect on the readers when the author makes them beg and grovel for subsequent chapters.

Although I do not know how it is going to end, I hope that you keep writing new fine stories.

The wife has blown it up big time. It is going to be easy for the husband to kick her ass out when it comes to that. All he needs is a pair of medium size balls.

Thanks.

The writting was very good and the stroy flowed very well. The husband will be hurt by the wife's actions, but the one who will really be hurt is their little girl.

The children are always the ones to suffer. One of these days the little girl will grow up. She will despise her mother for her actions and will never forgive her and her mother will not know why she feels this way.

Speaking from experience, I feel very sad that the little girl is hoping her mother will lover her more. You cannot replace a child growing up and that is what the mother/wife is missing and will never see. It is a rare and proud moment when your child does something for the first time, because it will never happen again.

I hope you will make this a happy ending to this stroy for there is so much un-happiness in this world.

Yes, I know it sometimes drives us all crazy to get short chapters that leave us wanting more but I think the author has explained what the heck happened very well. I'm impressed by the emotional depth of the story already. Everyone familiar with me and my stories knows I prefer to forgive when possible. As a mother myself, I'm already so mad at Laura I could kick her butt.

Well written first chapter, but the emotional build-up and tension is gone. It is already obvious that Laura doesn't give a shit about her husband or her daughter. The only suspense remaining is what he does about it. the Ct Yankee

This sounds like the old "He's married but she's not'.

Hopefully he can straighten things out but if she's acrually fucking around all this time, I hope he and the daughter can find a good woman as wife and mother.

How can you say he's a wimp? He's given her freedom and now decides she has taken more than liberty. He now needs to prove exactly WHAT she has been doing! If she's screwing around, bounce her ass down the sidewalk!

I really enjoyed the first chapter, but wish it were longer.I hope this dosen't turn into another wimpy/cuckold story.God knows that we have way to many of them already.Just putting my two cents in.again great story so far.

The old saying, "A child will lead them", is ringing true in this will written begining. If she drives a lexus and he drives a SUV, then he can afford a private investigator to check out her meeting with the "girls" story. Seems if the could be getting fucked by the girls 3 or times a week.

He must be glad he has not eaten a creampie yet. Please continue.

The old saying, "A child will lead them", is ringing true in this will written begining. If she drives a lexus and he drives a SUV, then he can afford a private investigator to check out her meeting with the "girls" story. Seems if the could be getting fucked by the girls 3 or times a week.

He must be glad he has not eaten a creampie yet. Please continue.

Great start.

But it drives me mad the way so many critics of loving wife stories preach about the evils of adultery rather than assessing the story on its merits! Some men want revenge on cheating spouses. Some men get turned on by cheating spouses. Can't we have both sorts of stories without critics voting down one or other sort because they disagree with the (fictional) husband's response to his wife's infidelity!!!!!!!!!

I just finished your other fabulous series. I was so happy to see you had written another, too! Lucky (me) and other Literotica readers!

to the plot good story,to the wife a sorry mom and wife.why would you want to be with a woman that don't want you.

There is obviously more to this story. I am anxious to read the rest of it.

This guy is a dumbshit.

Awesome Story! Well written, excellent read! I'm looking for the rest of the chapters!

:)

A good start to the story.

because what you've wrote about how this man think is he stupid or you the writer stupid. for you've wrote a story and didn't think about how it sounds.moms gone from her child of three as much as this whore.the male in your stories are whiners and weak men.

It's amazing how we let our love blind us to things that are happening around us...good start so far.

Cuckoldry. Stop reading now if you aren't a creampie-eating RAAC, read on if you love to see cuckolds eating creampies.

Unacceptable story. A wife and mother would not leave under those conditions unless she already decided on a divorce or is mentally disturbed.

Maybe you should make the comments make sense in your quest to climb the most comments list.

The stage is set for various possible stories.

To the gentleman(?) below, up to this point we know very little. Perhaps she has a brain tumour! But, of course, the title tells it all, and there is no way to not suspend judgement until the story is complete, or else, if we go on the succeeding chapters give it a good grade because it kept us interested...

are men really this submissive? lying to themselves while their wives are cheating on them?!? Are they even male?

should re-evaluate themselves, TK U MLJ LV NV

to find out. When the slut came back she would accidently fall down some stairs and break her neck. End of problem

No balls hubby. and what Mother doesn't care about her child like that. He should have been already prepared for divorce before this. hope he grows a set in the next chapter

Heart wrenching to say the least. Excellent.

I love how these "loving wives" need all their "me" time when they are out half the time.

Thanks for sharing.

and more att's become wealthier, TK U MLJ LV NV

....and that would be her cunt.

Second time through. Beautifully detailed. Five stars.

I know I have read this one before - the 3-year-old's questions are quite memorable. I can't remember how the story progresses or ends, so here I go again. Six more chapters. I hope they are interesting because I believe her "in your face" attitude would cause me to start planning my exit strategy.

They are real life...

She is so obviously cheating.

I'm guessing the mention of the camisole upset her because she wore it on one of her "girls'" nights, and her playmate destroyed it.

...She either couldn't lie or wouldn't lie.

When I suspected, I asked her. Her response was enough, her eyes widened and then she began to cry. Through her sobs, she admitted it. We'd been married 7 years, she came off the pill a few months before and we were trying to have a baby. It was like a punch in the guts.

I didn't say anything. I avoided her the rest of the evening and when it was bedtime, I took the spare bedroom. I could hear her crying down the hall but I had things to do. I was gone to work before she got up and I was only waiting for her to leave for work. After I hit the bank and took 1/2 our money, minus a penny, I started calling and canceling all our credit cards. It wasn't much after 10am when I pulled into our rental.

An hour and I was down the road with a severance check, my final paycheck and half our money. From our home, I had only taken personal items, clothes, my four guns, laptop and some tools. What I left was my cellphone and on top of that, my wedding ring. Lastly but not least, I took every picture we had of the two of us together and burned them in the sink. Those online that I could find, I deleted forever. As forever as the internet is nowdays.

Then I drove away. Cheaters are cheaters because that is what they are. Its in their DNA and they can no more stop it than they can fly. Tearful plea's, promises, they are all worthless. She once told me she hated a cheater more than anything else in the world. I guess it was self hatred.

Am I still married? Dunno, don't care. Haven't even had a girlfriend in the past 4 years I've been gone. Just no interest in the 'cheater' sex. I suppose I will someday, but right now, I don't even want to talk to a woman.

As per usual, we have the makings of another good story.

Still five stars. Still love it.

Visiting your stories again, looking forward to seeing this one roll out. Great writing, 5 stars.

nuff' said

Its a great story and very well written to those who have any critical ability 5*

It was the same crap as Laura in this story. I asked her to start making time for me, rather than go out when I was home from work. Her answer? "You don't own me. I need time for myself, stop smothering me."

I took her at her word. Her speech alone wasn't the breaking point. It was the snide, heartless and yet condescending way she delivered it. We locked eyes for a few moments before she turned, picked up her purse and car keys and left without looking behind.

I knew she would be late getting home. She went out to 'party', a euphemism for fucking someone else. At least, that's what I've always believed. She left at 7:30 and wouldn't be home before 2 a.m.

My kids were almost 3 and the other just a few months past 4. Lottie was at the end of the driveway before I was packing. The kids were already in bed, I took the time to pack shit I thought we would need and things dear to me. The last thing I did was wake the kids and load them into their car seats. My wedding ring was left on the kitchen table on top of our wedding photo torn in half. It used to hang in the living room before I 'liberated' it.

My truck was old. It was a '74 Ford, 2-wheel-drive. In 1992, it was old! There was a canopy on it, plus the new engine only had 22,000 miles on it. The 4 speed transmission was bullet-proof. Once the kids were in their car seats, there wasn't much room for anything anywhere except the floorboards. In the bed in back, was a twin mattress to sleep on and my sleeping bag and extra blankets. A cooler was filled with about everything I could fit into it from the refrigerator, freezer and cupboards.

Starting from our former home in east Texas, we drove the next 3 days to Anacortes, Washington. We caught the ferry, after waiting two days, up the inland passage to Alaska. After paying for the tickets, I was almost broke. We slept in the truck and the girls had a blast.

I'm a writer, it's what I have always done. I was hired in Anchorage at a small bookstore and was paid minimum wage. The only reason I took it, the girls could stay with me as long as they didn't damage anything. They didn't. Over time I found better paying jobs and eventually bought my own boat and started fishing commercially.

Did my wife look for me? I guess, but it's really hard to say. The girls grew up on the boat, homeschooled and also working hard. When they were 13 and 15, they started playing school sports and did very well. We never heard from my ex during that time, nor did the girls mention her.

She finally tracked us down. We were living in Skagway and my oldest was graduating from high school. The ceremony was about to begin when I glanced across the gym and saw my ex, really my wife, I'd not divorced, watching me and our youngest sitting next to me. It was shocking, but I didn't let it show.

Oddly enough, she didn't make contact with me nor the kids. She left soon after, although she had taken lots of pictures. We never heard from or saw her again until my youngest graduated and again, there she was.

We're still married. That was over 20 years ago. We've still not spoke, although I found she moved to Skagway just a few months ago. Pity, I was moving closer to my girls college in Cheney, Washington in the next few weeks.

Yes, she found me there.

..... to what should be a very absorbing story based on past experiences with this author.

But as I have found out, so very many writers have great stories and great plot ideas. They just don't seem to know how to end them. I am hoping you will break the mold. Put as much effort into the ending as you have the beginning. Good luck to you.

We have been given a pointed series of markers. The wisdom of a child casts a dark shadow over little we know. Having only questions, Ch. 02 is calling.

What will he do next?

Laura is one cold bitch. Dump her and move on.

It seems all your protagonists are wimps!

She can't disappoint "the girls," as if none of them have ever missed a night? Assuming of course that's really where she's going!

What a deceitful, heartless bitch!! Her "girls' night" out is more important than her three year old daughter?! - whose enthusiastic prattle she ignores and continues with her primping?!- then defiantly leaves for her night out?! So, it is not relaxing staying home with her husband and her daughter? She needs to go out to relax? Ofcourse she's cheating and is going out to have her itch scratched! A real cunt! 5*****s.

Laura's name and picture to Google image search under the keyword "Cunt". Signed: BTW

I hate to see (or in this case, read) a grown man beg. It’s just too disgusting. I noticed that there are a couple more chapters to this story. I hope it improves, fast.

When money is not an issue, why the hell can't he hire a PI to record the bitch's activity? Apparently this has been going on for some time and he has been just sucking it up! Man, he needs some self respect. No woman is worth abject grovelling!! Love?! The bitch doesn't know the first thing about love. And - ignoring her baby's prattle. How hard hearted can the whore get? Does her cunt itch so bad that she requires to go out and constantly get it scratched??? Disgusting!

Seems all the husbands are pathetic wimps in these stories, too dumb to see what's in front of them.

This story has a pathetic wimp cuck for a hero. It was WAY TOO SHORT also...

It's just the beginning. The author has peaked my interest. Although very sad, I am eager to read on.

As is sadly the case with many Lit authors, this one doesn't know the difference between the verb to breathe and the noun breath.

after endless psychobabble about why the W is a slut.

Reading again, and previous comment stands. This is one cold bitch.

Great start from a great author ( reading for a second time). One point to mention I can’t understand why some people can award such low scores for a well written story because of a few spelllingi erors, how the hell did old winston get such literary accolades ? Just 5⭐️.... P.

so sad, cheating wives, cheating husbands, why? I never will understand it and I'm almost 80. Why get married if you're going want to screw around? Good story so far.

Obviously a cheating wife, what now?

Nice start. Wondering why hubby took so long to recognize the ‘signs’.

If cheating signs arent obvious men really have no clue. Women can get away with cheating, men cannot, their wives will always know regardless if they choose to stay married and play naive.

This is his chance to catch her in the act but hes too ignorant and kind of stupid...he looks like a cuck or a wimp and i won't be surprised if he take her back.

Weak man begging her not to cheat on him. He should have pushed the issue or followed her or something. He is letting her take the lead. A real man is always proactive.

Well done. You can tell because all of the ineffectual little anonywimps are pissing themselves. Good base for the story.

LWlurker

This is a poor guy in denial Who suddenly woken up to the real fact that his wife is cheating on him. What interests me is why he let her get away with going to girls night out 3 to 4 nights a week and allowing her to attribute that to quarter"blowing off steam"

If nothing else her total lack of compassion understanding and caring for her family and especially your daughter is a major tip off the woman isn't in that family any more of them for a place to hang up her hat.

At this point I'm looking for this man to cowboy up and start being proactive and find out what's going on and make sure hes got everything nailed down suddenly to protect him in his daughterAt this point I'm looking for this man to cowboy up and start being proactive and find out what's going on and make sure hes got a thing nailed down suddenly to protect him in his daughterAt this point I'm looking for this man to cowboy up and start being proactive and find out what's going on and make sure hes got everything nailed down suddenly to protect him and his daughter

Spoiler alert, the spineless wimp husband takes the cheating, betraying slut back. The Anonymous Literotica Cuck Army and their ilk rejoice...

So sad when the little daughter can even figure out something is wrong with her mom.

Why the fuck would any husband put up with this shit?

He wouldn't. This makes zero sense.

She's out with "friends" 4 nights a week?

Fuck that. It'd never happen unless he was a cuckold.

Why the fuck would any husband put up with this shit?

He wouldn't. This makes zero sense.

She's out with "friends" 4 nights a week?

Fuck that. It'd never happen unless he was a happy cuckold.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

This authors little cream pie fantasies are all epitomised by this sordid shitty little tale

All too true.

Wow! Didn't take long to get the Anon brigade wound up.

The making of a really good story. The salient problem, as some below have already made comment, is how completely absurd the husband is. Gone 4 nights a week with her friends? Completely isolating herself from her child and husband? And you expect your readers to not see this plot as unbelievable beyond imaging?

This is an insult to us. Weave a better plot that allows us to suspend disbelief.

Please to think of this as less than a request to dig down to find a better plot.

I think you write well but take more time to write a believable plot.

To:

"Wow! Didn't take long to get the Anon brigade wound up"

I argue, as to others, for better writing,i.e., Solider Box, Saddle Tramp, Todd, et all.

There is nothing wrong in that.

Ultimately the series is highly complex and interesting. But it is beyond belief that it takes as long as it does for thr husband to suspect something. She didn't just leave clues, she put up thr freaking cheating wife equivalent of the Gotham City PD Bat Signal. Wow.

Well that’s set the scene well, nice characters and you have already made us see it coming

DUMP THE BITCH, CHANGE HER THE LOCKS, ETC....

He is not weak, not yet anyway. He is a family man, a husband and a father, faced with Femdom agitprop. He is only weak if he chooses to become a cuck, whatever his reasoning.

@HighBrow Of course, no one ever cheater on their partner before feminism. lol. what a clown.

No, l'il Anony, no one ever cheated on their partner as a political statement before feminism.