Making Quick Coin

Author's note: the events described in this story are non-canonical to these characters.

Thoroughly fed up facing the humdrum of dreary Malmhule for months on end without a single holiday to break up the routine, Min believed a getaway - no matter how short - was long overdue, with the goblin girl quick to decide on a weekend spent in Klúbbafer - Snjórland's party capital famed for its nightlife, bars and entertainment incomparable to anywhere else on the island - would be just the ticket! However, two whole days without anybody else joining Min on the mischief she would undoubtedly be making while on this trip would turn quite tedious, which is why she persuaded (read: coaxed) two of her top boys in all of Occassus to accompany her on the sojourn: Gyllen the prince and Argento the apprentice cat burglar, a duo of young effeminate men who coincidentally just so happened to be the near spitting image of one another in spite of there being absolutely zero blood connection between them; identical in bonny features, light skin tone, slim shape, below-average height and even the styles of their long tresses, with the sole physical difference between the two being the pigmentation of said tresses: Gyllen's being lustrously golden while Argento's were a satiny silver.

The three converged early on the appointed day in the Laughing Laelaps Public House in Malmhule's Monster District, with Min naturally being the first to arrive well ahead of the specified time to help herself to a number of morning pick-me-up pints before greeting the human lads upon their later arrival at roughly the same instant. Once their hellos had been exchanged, the trio then caught and each paid their fare for the next coach departing from the city's carriage station, each one carrying their own luggage, with Min in particular dragging a suitcase almost as large as her three-foot self, though refused to divulge what it contained to her companions quite yet, insisting it was a surprise she would reveal only once they reached Klúbbafer.

The two human males and the goblin female spent an innocuous enough four-hour ride engrossed in sharing anecdotes on what each respective party had been up to since they saw one another last: oft humorous, occasionally erudite and more than once - in Min's case especially - ribald in the most graphic description she could articulate, much to Gyllen's mortification and to Argento's mirth. Conversation topics aside, each member of the group was greatly looking forward to what this weekend would entail to varying extents, however, all their anticipations would reach a grinding halt regardless of their levels once the three came to an impasse during a stopover in Leiðinlegur; a town significant only in its insignificance, other than it being precisely halfway between Malmhule and Klúbbafer.

Their current cab was only willing to carry them this far from the capital, meaning the travellers would have to change carriages to continue the remainder of the way, but there was about an hour to pass before their second transport was due for departure. Gyllen and Argento elected to take an aimless wander together through Leiðinlegur's samey streets until the scheduled time, though Min chose to spend the interval instead wetting her whistle at one of the local watering holes, generously offering to keep an eye on the boys' bags in the meanwhile so that they may better enjoy their walk unburdened, but being so quick to accept leaving the goblin unsupervised with their possessions - purses included - proved to be a most fatal error, as rather than being well on their way to Klúbbafer once the hour was up, the three instead found themselves standing stranded on a street corner still in Leiðinlegur.

"I thought-a you say we have enough money to get us all to Klúbbafer and back again no problema?" Aregento asked his travelling companions, his voice soft, but his Caligan accent heavy.

"We did...however, fool that I was, I neglected to factor in Min's idea of a 'few bevvies' being to nearly drink a tavern's entire reserve dry, plus her complete lack of principles about borrowing cash without consulting the lenders first." Gyllen answered, although staring daggers at Min while he spoke rather than looking to his doppelganger.

"I am just amazed how one so little can drink-a that much and still be conscious..." Argento added, joining in on the louring upon the offending goblin.

"Lissen, the skinflints who run that place mus' be fillin' their kegs one parts lager and two parts water, 'cause I'm jus' as shocked as you that I'm feelin' nothin' 'cept for a bit a' a buzz after spendin' all that! Alright, I may have gotten a bit carried away in the heat a' me probin's, but really, I'm doin' the people in this town a favour exposin' those frauds!" Min was swift to defend herself. "Gods above, no wonder this place's got a reputation for a whole loada nothin' if this is what the folk livin' here have gotta suffer..."

"Yes, yes, all very well and noble, but I only wish your heroic deed was not at the literal cost of our fare." Gyllen shook his head and sighed.

"Oi, I said I'll pay ya both back in full once we're back in Malmhule...eventually...probably." Min further added.

"That isn't the point, Min...although I'll be fretting over that when the time comes. But my concern at present is that we're halfway between our destination and home with hardly a handful of pennies in our collective pockets to pay for even a single ticket either way, let alone three! So, unless anybody is keen on a very long walk through the countryside back to Malmhule, I'm open to ideas on how this may be rectified." The blond looked back and forth between his silver-haired lookalike and the redheaded goblin.

"Alright, alright, chill! I got us int' bother, sure, but I can jus' as easily get us outta it! C'mon, you two, I've got a plan!" Min boldly claimed as started striding down the street with a determined speed, forcing the two boys to keep pace with her rather than the other way around despite her shorter legs while hauling her heavy luggage behind, and nearly causing them to trip over their own feet when she sharply turned left without apprising down a shadowy alleyway enclosed directly between the pub that had benefited from the goblin's stubbornness and a commonplace baker's shop.

The young human men followed the goblin woman all the way to the far end of this slightly off-smelling lane that terminated in an impassable brick wall taller than any of they. Min then set her suitcase down here, flicked the dials on the three-number lock to their correct combination before unclicking both latches at the same time. "I was hopin' t' save these as a surprise for when we got t' Klúbbafer, but desperate times an' all that. Change yer kit wi' what's inside quick now, you two, while I drum up the punters! Jus' follow my lead once I get back, alright?" She said, scooting back down the alley just as expeditiously as she had come up it, leaving Gyllen and Argento faster than either were able to ask her to elaborate. The two mirror images glanced at each other, the platinum-haired of the pair merely giving a shrug while the blond made a weary sigh before he crouched down to open the trunk.

"Oh, she cannot be serious!" Gyllen announced wide-eyed and aloud upon seeing the contents of the case and realising in that selfsame moment precisely what Min had in mind as a solution to their predicament, prompting Argento to peek over the prince's shoulder to see what could elicit such a reaction, and although the Caligan was astonished at first by what he saw, he merely made an amused laugh immediately afterward.

* * *

Stefán Óskarson - aged 32, unmarried and an unassuming blacksmith who had spent his whole life in Leiðinlegur - was just leaving his local as his lunch hour was coming to an end to reopen his shop a short walk away when he stopped upon hearing the sharp sound of hissing through teeth, followed by a female's voice gaining his attention: "Psst! Hey, pal!" He looked over to the adjacent alley where these sounds were coming from to see a goblin girl he had never before met peeking her half-shaved head from behind the corner. "Yeah, yerself! You look like a fellah who could do wi' a bit a' excitement in his life. Fancy seein' somethin' interestin'?"

Stefán laughed. "Oh, really now? And by 'interesting', do you mean mugging me at knifepoint? Come on, how stupid do you think I am?"

"An' how stupid do ya think I'd hafta be t' pull somethin' like that in broad daylight, eh?" Min retorted sharply to prevent him walking away then and there. "Gotta admit, it is yer cash I'm after, but 'sonly an honest trade I'm peddlin'. Jus' five minutes a' yer time is all I'm askin', an' if yer not interested, yer free t' walk away, no charge. Or are ya really that afraid a' one li'l gobbo nearly half yer size?"

"Fine, you've got my curiosity at least." The blacksmith acceded with a shake of his head, swayed by Min's sheer insistence. "But not too long now, okay?"

"Right this way, good sir!" Min beamed a toothy grin, and gestured for him to follow her all the way to the passage's dead-end out of plain sight.

In the three decades plus two years Stefán Óskarson had spent his average existence residing in this mundane town alongside its primarily orthodox population, he would be hard pressed to put his finger on any personal event which he could deem truly remarkable, so imagine his surprise when waiting for him ahead was Gyllen and Argento, who had both swapped their casual clothing into far less modest attire which Min had been lugging about in her luggage all day!

The blond prince was outfitted in a hot-pink boob tube that clung tight around his torso - even with his lack of denominative boobs - and a black miniskirt (with emphasis on the 'mini') which greatly highlighted the outline of his prominent posterior, as well as fishnet leggings from his knees to his feet which were fitted into a pair of platform heels that complimented the colour of his top and added a couple inches to his height. Meanwhile, the grey-haired boy was clad in a sky-blue crop top that bared the entirety of his flat stomach and a pair of ecru denim booty shorts that may as well have been panties given how the frayed 'legs' cut off immediately at his groin at the front while riding up his crevice at the back to give a generous glimpse of his buttocks, with both articles being equally as form-fitting as Gyllen's equivalent wardrobe, and likewise had his height slightly elevated thanks to a pair of knee-high high-heeled boots fashioned from white faux-leather. In addition, the crossdressers took the time to carefully paint each other's faces like courtesans with makeup that was tucked alongside the racy garments to accentuate the femininity of their features: peach-coloured gloss applied to their lips, subtle rouge brushed upon their cheeks, and their eyelashes enhanced with dark mascara.

"Whaddya think, guy?" Min then asked their potential client, whose jaw was currently dropped at the discovery of the two dolled-up trollops presented before him, even if Gyllen appeared visibly more uncomfortable with his glance cast aside and standing rigidly while fiddling with his skirt in comparison to Argento facing forwards and smirking, seeming far more at ease even as the chilly air nipped at his bare, hairless legs. "A pair a' barely-legal, blue-eyed beauties to do anythin' ya please with as for the low, low cost of three dinky gold coins for either, or five for the two. Trust me, for these lads, it's a proper bargain~"

"Wait, these are boys...?!" Stefán was brought out of his staring as his face snapped to the side and down to give the goblin an incredulous look after she had blurted the identity of their true genders without thinking.

"Er... I'm willin' t' bet ye they're a far deal prettier than any girlie ye've ever come across, right?" The goblin quickly spinned the slip of her tongue around to try and keep the man's interest, although uncertain from the way he reacted whether he was so inclined towards the same sex or not. "Well, prettier 'cept for yers truly, that is!" She was also prompt to add, and equally prompt was a belch - brought about from her earlier imbibing, no doubt - that had snuck up as soon as she finished speaking.

"And they look so similar too...are they...related...?" The blacksmith further inquired, pausing between his words as if uncertain he wanted to know the answer.

"Erm, yep! That's right! Twins, in fact!" Min lied once the suggestion had been put in her head, taking an even bigger risk with this taboo improvisation. "Got a thing for that sorta stuff, pal?"

"Oh, really, Min, now you're taking things a tad too fa-" Gyllen began to protest aloud, not liking where his goblin friend's extemporising was leading, but before he could finish that final syllable, he was silenced when Argento had grabbed him by the arm and quickly yanked the blond's body into his before pressing his lips to the prince's for a deep kiss. Gyllen's eyes looked like they were about to pop from his skull as he felt the thief's tongue steal its way into his mouth and roll its way around his own lingual muscle, with Mr. Óskarson pulling an equally stupefied expression as he observed what he had been led to believe were two siblings engaging so openly in such forbidden behaviour. Even Min raised her red eyebrows with astonishment at Argento's ab-lib - although certainly did not dislike the sight herself - while the platinum-haired instigator remained perfectly calm in his one-sided snogging, though cast a sultry glance aside towards the older gentleman while he performed the amorous act, unable to help but raise the corners of his mouth by all the reactions he was deriving.

"Proper shameless pair these two, so they are! Ain't a thing they won' be up for!" Min further propounded - not wishing to waste Argento's spontaneous support - as her eyes travelled downwards to see that a rather conspicuous lump was now jutting from the front of Stefán's trews.

"Alright...you've tempted me...it's been a while since I last got any and, well, it's not as easy to go out on the pull as I'm getting older." The blacksmith conceded. "Can't say I've ever had to pay for it before now mind you...or ever been with another bloke in all my days for that matter. Then again, I've never met a man who looked as cute as these two tarts before now~" He gave a lecherous grin accompanied by a dirty chuckle. "I'd gladly give each of them a go as my first, but I'm a bit short this month, so just one will have to do."

"Ya won't regret it, pal, trust me!" Min smiled just as wide over her successful pitch. "So, who's t' yer likin', mate? Goldie or...er..." The goblin started asking, though trailed off as she drew a blank upon realising she and Argento had not agreed on a pseudonym suitable for him.

"Sterlina!" The silver-haired boy, however, was luckily sharp in thinking on his feet.

"Goldie and Sterlina!" Min reinstated with restored confidence, even though Argento's pun had gone over her head.

"Well, I'm more fond of blondes, but I get the sense the one in blue there seems to know how to handle things a mite better than her...sorry, his brother. At the very least, he seems a lot more eager~" Stefán determined.

"Oh, I think ya'd be surprised, mate, but the customer's always right~" Min said as she held her hand out, open and high as the blacksmith reached into his pocket before depositing three shiny minted discs into her green palm. "Knock yerself out~!"

With the transaction made, the boys' first customer of the day stepped towards them, although his hungry sights were set primarily on Argento.

"How do you want it, Signore~?" The trainee pilferer chirped in a cheerful tone, quick on the uptake with Stefán's - who did not question the discrepancy between these supposed sibling's dialects - apparent fancy for him.

"Alright, Sterlina, was it? Listen, as much as I'd love to explore everything you can do, I'm on the clock, so I'll be happy enough if you can just show me how you are with that cute little mouth of yours~"

Without wasting unnecessary breath with a verbal response, Argento speedily dropped down to kneel before the stranger and had his nimble fingers already set to work unbuttoning the blacksmith's fly the very instant his knees touched down onto the cobblestones below, fully unfastening the trouser opening in a single second flat, and reached in, rummaged and pulled out his erection of average length in his soft hand within the span of just two more, shewing minimal wasted movement that would have impressed even most veterans of his trade had such prowess been demonstrated in removing a wallet from a pocket rather than a penis from underwear!

As self-assured as he may have spoken in his forwards saunter, in truth, simple Stefán was taken aback by how straightforward this silver-haired stranger was in pulling his private part from his pants when even his exes had never been so unquestioningly cooperative whenever he requested such favours. Granted, this was a service he was paying for and expecting his fee's worth, but 'Sterlina' never gave so much as an exchange of speech before he had already set himself to the task, spending a very brief interval giving the smith's cock a few pumps in his clasp before opening his grinning mouth to place the penis' tip on his presented tongue.

Argento then closed his lips around his client's glans to start sliding them down a couple of inches then back again in several short bursts, while Gyllen watched on equally as speechless as Stefán initially was - whose speechlessness had since been swapped for a stream of moans from the Caligan's efforts - by how enthusiastic his compatriot seemed to be in sucking off a complete stranger at midday in an outdoor alleyway regardless of it being their cab fare at stake, in spite of such a scenario being something the prince was not unfamiliar with performing himself more than occasionally during his romps alongside Min, although it was another thing entirely to witness another act so promiscuous while he merely stood idly by, especially when the other in question bore an almost exact resemblance to himself.

"Look alive, Goldie, I found ya a job!" Min's voice then called to Gyllen out of view just a minute or two after Argento had engaged in his fellating, her words abrupt and disproportionately loud enough to immediately snapped him out of his study of the silver-haired lad's oral techniques and look to his side to see his goblin confidant rattling another contribution of coins in her mitt while in the company of another older man, not bad to look at by any means, although the prince was still not particular to the prospect of being pimped out.

"Cor! You weren't half-kidding about his looks, Greenie!" This nameless newcomer commented upon setting his sights on the blond, and evidently pleased by what he was seeing.

"I take it he's looking for much of the same treatment then?" Gyllen plainly quizzed Min.

"Erm, not quite...Tómas here is in th' market for somethin' a bit more substantial than a blowie, if ya get what I mean." Min disclosed, with Gyllen having a good idea what she was insinuating that was only solidified with what she instructed him to do next. "Turn 'round an' put yer hands 'gainst the wall, Gold, while I get ya's both prepped up."

With a sigh, Gyllen complied with the goblin's instruction and faced the side of the pub adjacent to where he was standing, placing his palms flat against the grubby brickwork with his hips projected slightly backwards while Min rummaged around in her suitcase, searching for one particular item of importance she had packed: a glass bottle containing a viscous liquid. Upon finding said item, the redheaded goblin then lifted the blond's skirt up to reveal the lacy black cheeky-panties he wore underneath before yanking them in the opposing direction to Gyllen's knees, the boy thankful that his flushed face and embarrassed expression from his pale booty, backsack and small, uncircumcised prick dangling in front being bared for all present to view would be unseen at the angle he was at.