Marion's Story Ch. 13

"Fuck listen to yourself, the only reason you're behaving like this crazy prissy bitch is because you are jealous. If this is the way you're going to behave maybe we really should look at where we're going?"

I think she expected me to back down but I snapped back caustically, "Yeah maybe we should." I picked up my purse and makeup bag and stormed out of the room leaving her standing staring after me.

I went down to the auditorium and climbed up on stage, tuned my guitar and busied myself getting ready for the night. Mel walked up on stage and recognized my discomfort, "Are you alright Mi?"

I shrugged, "Yeah I suppose."

"Can I help?"

"No thanks Mel, just give me some space OK."

"Wow what crawled up your ass and died?"

Angry and hurting I snarled, "Just give me some fucking space OK?"

She walked off to do her tuning and preparations. Jas and Cindy arrived and I noticed Mel wave them away when they came over to talk to me.

We gathered in the green room waiting for the show to start. There was plenty of booze so I grabbed a drink, pulled my headphones on and sat in the corner brooding.

The girls obviously picked up on my bad mood and stayed out of my way. They grouped together to go over the set list and talk about tonight. I was on my second drink when Molly walked in, when she saw me sitting by myself, ignoring me she walked over to the girls and fell into their discussion purposefully ignoring me. I was obviously the topic by the rapid eye movements and hidden finger pointing.

With only ten minutes to go before show time Molly came and grabbed the headphones, "Are you going to talk about the show, or are you going to be a bitch all night?"

"There's only one bitch in here and girl it ain't me!"

Giving me dagger stares she stormed over to the door calling out, "Have a good night girls." She slammed the door and disappeared in a flash oh red.

Jas came over and wrapped her arms around me, "What's up babes, you're angry about something."

"You saw the way she carried on with Gloria, I caught them earlier cuddled up together. Fuck this is April all over again."

Jas hugged me tight, "No babes, she wouldn't do that to you, you're mistaken. She was just flirting like she always does."

"No this was different, I saw that look in her eye."

Mel and Cindy joined in the group hug and we huddled together until the stage manager came and called us out.

As we walked out onto the stage and the lights came on full, the room burst into a huge riotous uproar. The crowd swelled to the front. Jesus, they had packed them in that's for sure.

I scanned the room for Molly but with the lights shining brightly in my eyes it was impossible to see anything further back than about three deep.

We started with home town and the demons twisting my guts eased a little as we built into it. The crowd erupted and the mosh pit came to life, swaying bouncing jumping bodies were everywhere.

Jas started dancing as she does and of course the deafening roar escalated even more. She danced over in front of me and we rocked and swayed in time with our strings almost touching and her face right in mine the crowd pushed over the flimsy fence at the front and surged forward, two girls scrambled up on stage to dance with Jas and me. Jas yelled and sang with them leading them over by her spot so nothing got broken before security dragged them away.

All through the night I couldn't shake the anger and I took it out on my guitar playing loud raucous solos, much longer than I usually did, the band thankfully picked up on my mood and covered for me, playing along. I think they recognized I needed to release the anger.

At the end of the first set the house lights came back on and the spot lights went off. I took my time scanning the room and soon spotted Molly and Gloria up in a booth together with a bottle of champagne. Their arms were linked and they laughed leaning heavily against each other. When Molly spotted me staring at them she didn't even move, she laid down her challenge. The smug look on Gloria's face said even more and it antagonized me lifting my already bubbling blood pressure.

The show went off as I laid down wild guitar solo after solo and when I sang it was loud full throated and Mel followed. Jas and Cindy jumped on board, Jas with her ass rubbing mine as we stood back to back rocking it out. Cindy with a huge smile thundered her way through the songs adlibbing as I stretched out the solos. At one point I was up on the drum riser hanging trills out and Cindy rollicking away like an out of control muppet. We were loud and we rocked. The crowd much wilder and raucous than normal and they went ballistic.

After we spent the best part of an hour signing albums and T-shirts and talking to the fans they finally dissipated and we slid into the green room to recover.

Two drinks in and Molly walked in with Gloria who looked as happy as could be, "Woo hoo!" She shrieked. "Well girls now I've seen you live I gotta say I see what all the fuss is about...you guys are hot. Holy shit that rocked, I have never seen an audience here go off like that."

Mel thanked her for her praise and they hugged. Molly walked over to me, "Babe you were on fire tonight, you should use that every night, and my god those guitar solos were amazing."

Gloria wandered over to stand beside Molly and smile seductively at me, "Oh yes indeedy sugar you were super." She turned to the other's, "You were all sensational, look we are going to have to celebrate, what do you say we all have a party up in my room I want you all to come up and we can kick back and enjoy ourselves."

There was plenty of head nodding and agreement from the others but I bit my tongue holding back the angry words. When I didn't respond Gloria turned to stare into my eyes, "What about you? Are you coming up for a drink?"

I shook my head, "Nope, I am shattered, I'm going to bed."

She frowned, "C'mon sugar, just a few drinks, we can all unwind and catch our breath, hell that was some show...surely you want to celebrate."

When I just took a long pull on my drink she cooed, "Sugar...it's still early, don't be a party pooper."

Molly intervened, "Come on babe just for a while, I'm going."

Snarling I spat out, "You can do what you want but I'm going to bed." I turned and walked out to pack up my stuff and head back to my room. As I was folding up my cables Molly walked up behind me, "Babe don't act like this, there's no need for all this childish jealous crap, fuck it's just for a few drinks it's her way of saying well done and thanks."

"Fuck her, I'm not interested in anything she has to say."

"Babe you might change your mind, she wants to talk about funding a recording deal. When I said we had lots of offers but you wanted to keep it independent she said she was interested and might fund it. Shit after the way you guys played tonight, she's sold. Please I'm begging just come up and talk to her."

"Fuck her, I'm going to bed, oh and by the way I will never play for her again. If she is the promoter I'm not interested."

Shocked she snarled, "Don't be ridiculous, the band has always talked about getting a deal which allowed us to be independent, not tied to a label, Christ it was your fucking idea for god's sake."

"I'm not interested in being part of her bullshit circus. My answer is no!"

I stormed off stage with Molly screaming after me. I went back to the hotel room and jumped into the shower where I soaked for a half hour or so. The stinging needles totally did the trick I felt at least a little more relaxed, I climbed into bed trying to sort out my thoughts.

This whole thing was fueled by Molly's behavior and yeah it might be jealousy on my part, and yeah it might be petty but nobody wants to see their girlfriend carry on like that with somebody else. Molly was right I was jealous. Mostly though I was infuriated by the woman's effect on her and there was no doubt in my mind if I said it was OK, they would be sleeping together tonight, fuck they probably would anyway. It just brought back all those bitter memories about her and April.

It didn't help that I was questioning myself about my appearance and the future. I wanted to be pretty for Molly and I realized my limitations and had secretly started taking hormones again to try and become more female. Now I wondered if I was wasting my time.

Sleep was difficult but I did eventually drift off.

The door smashing open and Molly stumbling in crashing and banging as she bounced from one bit of furniture to next woke me with a start. When I checked the clock, it was three AM. I watched her stumbling around and it would have been laughable if I wasn't so irate.

She lurched over to the bed and collapsed beside me, "Hey babe, I'm home."

I pulled the covers up over my head facing away from her as I tried to stay calm. She ripped the blankets back crying, "C'mon you little bitch, don't play hard to get I know you want it." As she reached for me I pushed her away, "Fuck off Molly, go back to your slutty friend."

She slumped down beside me, "Oh don't be a bitch, you already missed the party which was awesome by the way. All the girls are laughing at you for being such a fucking sissy."

Snatching the blankets back I barked, "Yeah well at least I'm not a cheating slut."

Smack...smack... blow after blow rained down on my shoulders and arms as I tried to defend myself. Her fists pounded down on me, "You asshole, you wussy jealous little shithead. We were just having some fun and the girls love the idea of recording so shove that up your ass, it's happening bitch whether you like it or not."

Laughing hysterically, I screeched, "Like fuck it is, there's no fucking way I'm doing anything for that slut."

"Oh, good fucking lord... jeez Mi you are such a fucking child, what if I did sleep with her, fuck you don't own me, I told you right from the start I don't believe in that monogamous shit."

"So, you did sleep with her then?"

"No, you dipshit I'm just saying if I did it would've just been for a bit of fun. You can't tell me what to do."

"Maybe I can't but I don't have to put up with that bullshit from my wife!"

She flopped back on the pillow, "Oh just go back to sleep if you're gonna act like a wimpy bitch, I don't want to hear it."

She sucked back a sniffle as she sobbed, "Fuck you Mi you spoilt a wonderful night. We got a record deal and had a great party. Jeez Gloria wants to really push us she wants to get us overseas. It would take us to the next level."

"I don't care." I snorted, "Just go to sleep."

With the blankets pulled up I was soon serenaded to sleep with first her sobs then her snores. This had spiraled out of control so fast, no less than a day earlier we were on top of the world and if anybody had suggested we would be having this fight right now I would have laughed my head off.

An independent record release recorded in a top notch studio was my dream. The other girls had been happy to accept any one of the many labels who had been fighting for our signature but I held out because I wanted to maintain a level of control over the release and the quality. To have it within our grasp was awesome but to have that manipulative bitch in charge made me want to vomit.

In the morning I wandered down to breakfast still feeling like shit, I had hardly slept and I felt terrible. Molly was still in bed snoring like a frigging tractor so I left her. The roadies were all there lined up filling their plates from the buffet. Grabbing a plate, I filled my plate and sat down with them a decent breakfast was exactly what I needed.

Cindy and Jas drifted down first and Cindy commented innocently unaware of the drama, "You missed a great party last night girl, it was a blast. Did Molly tell you we have our record deal? It's happening, I can't believe it."

Jas hi fived her adding, "Hell yeah and a trip overseas as well, man what a buzz."

I kept my mouth shut trying to maintain control and swallow back the stinging vitriolic obscenities that swelled within me. Mel wandered out as well and she was happier than any of them.

She gave me a smug glare, "Well have you heard? We are on our way baby. Gloria said she would have the paperwork drawn up and if we can delay leaving till eleven, we can have it finalized, signed sealed and delivered.

I couldn't hold it back any longer, I snapped loudly, "Girls I'm not working with that woman. I don't like her and I'm not signing anything, she's a manipulator."

Mel spat out with a snarling hiss, "Now hang on one god damned minute Mi...this is what you wanted, we turned down all those fucking record labels waiting for this and now you're not signing...no way girl we are signing."

Antagonized by her pushy attitude I barked back, "Mel you can do what you want but I'm not signing anything. I'm not working with her."

Just then Gloria came bustling up, her hair done, her makeup perfect looking spectacular, "Good morning girls, I have just got off the phone with my lawyer and she is getting the papers drawn up right now. We should have them here before you leave."

Sensing tension, she gazed around the group, "What is going on? Is there a problem? Is there something wrong with the food? And where the hell is Molly, I just got off the phone with her?"

At that moment Molly wandered in looking very second hand, puffy red eyes and she didn't look well, "Hey guys."

Her and Gloria hugged, Gloria giving her a quizzical glare as she pulled out a seat across the table from me. Gloria who was still standing mumbled, "Will somebody please tell me what's going on?"

Staring up at her I blurted out angrily, "I'm not signing. I don't know what you all talked about last night but I'm out."

She leaned on the table glaring at me, "Mimi, Last night you girls blew my socks off and I loved the show. I think you guys can be huge, what I want to do is this, I will fund your independent record deal. I will pay for it and set up distribution and we will share the profits and I want to include not only a huge national tour but I want to take this overseas, make it truly international. If we can really nail home that album, I believe you have at least three number one hits in your set. After watching you guys last night, I'm more convinced than ever you're the real deal. I want in."

"Yeah well that's tough because I don't like what you're selling...Lady, I don't trust you not one damn bit."

She gazed around the rest of the band with a stunned confused expression twisting her face, "Girls, is that how you all feel? Is that what you all think? Do you think that little of me?" She looked around the group which was silent, "Girls I thought last night you liked my suggestions? I thought you were all into it?"

Mel gave me a nasty glare before she growled, "We are, Jas, Cindy and I are totally on board. We like what you suggested and if the contract says the same damn thing then we are ready to sign." She turned back to me and gave me an angry glare, challenging me, defying me to say no.

Gloria sighed, "Well if that's the case, who has signing rights for the band?" She glanced at Molly, "Well is there a spokesperson? Molly I thought you were the damn manager?"

I snapped, "Nope we have nothing signed, we do everything by agreement."

Caustically she growled, "If that's the case can we get some sort of consensus...who's in?"

The other girls all muttered their approval even Moly said, "For what it's worth, I think it's a fabulous deal. Mi I'm begging you don't let petty jealousy get in the way of making the right decision."

Gloria's steely gaze fell on me, "Can somebody please tell me what's going on Jealously...I don't understand?"

Mel answered, "Mi thinks you are after Molly, that is right isn't it Mi?"

Standing up I snarled, "Gloria I think you are an unscrupulous bitch I saw you with your hands all over Molly. I wouldn't work with you for any amount of money."

"Oh, for heaven's sake, you can't be serious...how dare you attack me like that....what in tarnation are you talking about...unscrupulous?" Leaning closer she spat out a deadly hiss "And how dare you insult me like that, so we flirted, big deal."

Barking angrily, I spat out, "Flirting my ass, Molly is my partner you scheming bitch, I saw you pawing all over her like a bitch in heat. You can shove your contract."

I flung my chair back sending it flying across the floor and walked off heading back up to our room to pack. By the time I got down to the bus the other girls were loading their gear. It was deathly silent, "Where's Molly?" I asked.

"She's trying to sort things out with Gloria before we leave. Jesus Mi what a fucking mess. You can be a real piece of work you know. Fuck that deal was everything we ever dreamed and talked about."

"Yeah well if you want it take it, just find another guitar player."

Jas heard and came running over, "Babes relax, we aren't getting another player. We are in this together but we need to talk. I mean we will never even see this woman again, we will be using her money to get what we want, that's all. Jeez we don't have to deal with her we can leave that all up to Moll's."

Shaking my head angrily I hissed, "Don't you get it Jas, I don't want Molly hanging around her."

She hugged me tight, "Babes, if Moll's was going to cheat she could do it whether we accept her offer or not.

"Yeah you're right, I understand she could do it any time and I've just come to that realization, but I'll be damned if I'm going to be contracted to the woman who stole her from me."

We were sitting in the bus when Molly came stumbling in, She sat down on the sofa in the middle of the bus and announced, "We need to talk." The others found seats where they could hear her and she glared back at me snapping, "You as well Mi."

"Carry on I can hear well enough."

"Have it your way." She turned back to the girls and spoke with a determined quiet purpose, "Look guys this deal is too good to pass up. Gloria is offering us everything we have ever talked about but she's not messing around. We need to make our minds up. She has given us a week to sort this shit out, sorry but I can't do any more."

Mel nodded, "Na you've done good Moll's you're right. I think we should vote on it. I mean we have always tried to do the right thing. If we vote then it's the democratic thing."

Jas and Cindy nodded in agreement. Molly added her agreement with a curt nod. I felt like they were all staring at me and I felt cornered. "It's pointless voting, we all know that you guys are going to vote yes. I'm not doing it. I refuse to work with her. You can vote, say whatever, do whatever but I ain't working for her. If you want to do it then I'll finish the tour and you can find somebody to replace me."

"Oh fuck off Mi you love this band." Molly snorted derisively.

"Yeah that's true but I'm not working with her end of story."

Mel growled, "Well I want that deal, I've said all along I want a record deal."

Jas sighed, "I don't want to do anything to break up the band. If Mi doesn't want to do it then I'm voting no."

Cindy shuddered, "Fuck this Mi, it's not fair you're holding us all to ransom and that's not fair. Jesus it was just some stupid flirting. I'm voting with Mel, it's a yes from me."

Molly sighed, "I agree, we have to do it."

Scowling I yelped, "You don't get a fucking vote, you're not in this band."

I heard the other girls all suck in deep breaths and I watched as Molly swallowed back whatever she was going to say.

We sat in silence for what felt like hours before Molly stood up and said, "Mi can we talk outside for a minute?"

She walked out and I followed her as she walked away from the bus deeper into the carpark. She kept walking and I caught up. As we walked, she asked, "Babe what the hell is going on? What the hell is this all about? Jesus it can't be just about the flirting."