Marion's Story Ch. 13

Her jaw just about hit the floor when I turned and walked away.

Back at my apartment I took a lot of time getting ready, choosing my outfit carefully. I wanted to look sexy but not slutty, I would leave that for the girls. I wanted to separate myself from the old image. I chose a bright lemon dress that with the help of the corset fitted closely and the way it flared out accentuated my shape making my hips more prominent. The bodice was low enough to show plenty of cleavage without looking slutty the hem line finished mid-thigh. Wearing pantyhose with a nude color showed off my legs especially with the matching shoes a modest three inch heel with straps that tied around my ankles. I loved the look, when I did a twirl and the dress flared out I felt sexy but holy shit, now I even looked like Taylor swift.

My makeup I kept simple, pretty but simple. I added a silver eye shadow, dark mascara and a fleshy pink lipstick. I topped it with some glitter to add some pizazz.

Once I arrived at the bottle Neck rather than go into the green room where I figured I wasn't going to be that popular I sat out in the audience with a couple of girls from school. As I sat somebody shouted loudly, "Boo!" In my ear and when I turned it was April and Sandy. They both gave me big hugs and plenty of kisses.

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked

April blurted, "C'mon do you think we were going to miss our two favorite acts. We sort of hoped you might get up with the girls and play a few songs."

I laughed, "Not likely, but thanks for coming along."

As I waited for my call we talked about work, school and I thanked her for the busking suggestion.

"You haven't considered getting back with the band?" Sandy asked.

"Na...that's finished I think." Just then I got a wave from the stage manager and I was up. "Good luck." They called as I walked up onto the stage.

After accepting this gig, I changed up some of my songs, I decided to start with Home Town it was the first song that the lips confiscated. As I stepped up on stage the crowd started chanting my name and swelled forward. Most of them didn't know what to expect. I opted to forgo my acoustic guitar and strapped on my Telecaster set the gain to high, stomped on my tube screamer and started with a powerful crunchy into, faster than when played by the Lips and with a lot more bite but the crowd recognized it and the chanting started to build rapidly. When I broke into the vocals that's when the screaming and foot stomping kicked off. The mosh pit filled with people swirling and dancing wildly. It wasn't packed but when I slipped into a wild guitar solo it filled immediately. I kept it fast with stinging notes and overdrive driven feedback.

As I finished, I let the feedback die slowly decaying gradually. I introduced myself to a tumultuous reception and then I started into another of the songs we did in the band, although this was a faster version which kept the dance floor filled especially when I went into a wild crunchy guitar solo with the big muff adding some real balls. As I glanced out at the audience I smiled, their new guitar player better be good or he was going to be dead meat.

I slowed it down for my next song relying on the really riffy blues tempo to carry it. Of course, the soaring vocals helped. I sensed the crowd getting behind me and they lifted me forcing me on. I knew I was doing OK and although I wanted to play some of my new stuff to make a point, I made sure I played every one of my songs that the band usually did.

At the end of the set I got three encores and I went way over time. Walking off stage I was ambushed by a huge swell of fans. I had a bunch of CD's for sale which went like hot cakes, I sold out within ten minutes. As the band was setting up Molly approached looking aggravated "You miserable malicious asshole, that was such a shitty thing to do. I told you those songs are on the girls list."

With a loud huff I spat out, "Then they better be good."

"Oh fuck off they can't play them now can they? They'll look stupid. You fucking ruined their first night."

"I ruined nothing, I told you I was going to play my songs."

"Yeah well I expected you to show them some respect. Jesus Mi, they are your friends for god's sake, shit I thought you would let them shine for their first gig."

"They can still do that, it's not like they don't have their own songs."

She breathed out deeply, "Yeah but your songs are the most popular and you know it."

I packed away my gear into my wagon and went back inside to sit with April and Sandy. As I sat down April hugged me, "My god little bro you rocked, holy hell."

"You were awesome babe." Sandy added with a hug, "Really good, you should have heard all the great comments."

"Oh hell yeah." April Spluttered.

The Lips were on stage and getting ready, it was then that I saw Gloria sitting in a booth off to the side by herself. She stared at me with a twisted disconcerted expression. As the band was set to blast into their first song Molly slipped into the booth beside her and they shared a quick kiss as their arms joined.

The band started with Cherry Red lips which was always a good start, Cindy started with her rolling drums, Jas came in on cue with her bass groove and they were away. Mel chimed in with her vocal and guitar, the new guy waited before adding his touch. He was a good player although I critiqued his playing assessing his sound to be very thin and way to distorted, more metal than rock. It was when he added his vocal it fell apart, his voice was a baritone and quite gravelly. Not what the crowd was used to.

Yeah, they got the crowd moving but the songs lacked finesse. I watched for a few minutes before making my excuses. April was a bit upset with me but I think she understood. As I was leaving, they jumped up onto the dance floor.

Just as I was about to climb into my car I got a tap on the back, it was Molly and when I looked past her Gloria as well. "Mi can we talk to you please?"

"No not tonight Moll's I want to get home."

Gloria stepped forward, "Mimi your set was very good, better than good actually, it was stunning...I have to say I'm very impressed. You know I could get your career moving, you could be playing much better venues than this."

"Sorry I only work with people I respect."

Gloria grimaced, her mouth drawing into a tight sneer. "Mi I know things didn't exactly get off on the right foot with us, but I would like to think you are big enough and professional enough to get passed that. Darling if you want a solo career I could help you get it."

"Sorry, but the answers still no." I meant to get in and drive away but my anger got the better of me and I spat out, "You know you people fucking amaze me, you have no morals, no scruples. Loyalty means nothing to you. You cheat and lie have sex with other people without considering the consequences and then expect people like me to just accept that is who you are...let me tell you that's not the way it works."

Molly tried to interrupt but I was in the zone and blustered past her. "No Molly you came here and wanted to talk so here it is. I loved you and would have given my life for you but you chose to sleep with this skanky old bitch instead. Gloria you are a slut, you can try to hide behind the concept of recreational casual sex but the bottom line is you are just a cheap slut."

Before either of them could interrupt I added, "Nobody cares about you, yes maybe your power gets some chicks but in ten years you will be old ugly and alone. You have no friend's only enemies. I don't know how many relationships you have destroyed but I'll bet there is a cue a mile long of scorned lovers waiting to stick a knife in your back."

I wound up my window crunched the car into gear and reversed out wildly with the wheels spinning and gravel flying. When I got home I climbed straight into bed and sobbed until I was exhausted and fell asleep on my sodden pillow.

The next day the papers were full of terrible reviews, the lips were heavily criticized although I was treated to a couple of great reviews. My Facebook page was full of glowing reviews. From that the gigs kept coming and with the end of the semester rapidly approaching I had to focus on my degree. I was pretty confident, I had put together a pretty strong final production and my essays and papers were all complete. My album constituted my final assessment.

The only thing missing was companionship. I was lonely. I did get asked out on a few dates but the girls seemed more interested in my celebrity status than my personality, or they were curious about a girl with a dick. I used that on occasion although it made me feel like a dipshit I balanced it out convincing myself they were getting what they wanted, I never led them on and there was never any misconceptions, it was just sex.

It was difficult because subconsciously I compared them all to Molly, and nobody could win in that comparison. I still felt the attraction and my dreams were still filled with visions and memories of her. She was my soul mate and I owed so much to her. It was her who pushed me into music, it was only her pushing that forced me out of my self-imposed prison, it was her who made me look in the mirror and accept who I really was. The magical relationship I now had with my mother, it was all down to her.

She was an enigma that's for sure, so caring and yet so cruel. She didn't lie or cheat she was right about that but she disregarded my concerns regarding fidelity, she trampled it into the ground. Just because she accepts casual sex as a thing she ignored the fact that I couldn't do likewise.

So with my graduation day closing in I sank all my attention into that.

Graduation day found me standing amongst my class members awaiting our call to the stage to receive our degrees. This was it, after today it was all over, my journey complete, I have to say I was flooded with emotion.

That was it, school and that phase of my life was finished, four years of hard work. Sitting at home I flopped back on the bed and pondered what to do with my life. Busking isn't really a career, but I was getting regular gigs at local bars now, mostly Sunday lunch or evening gigs but after opening for the lips I did get the occasional request from the Bottle neck for Saturday night, or weeknight gigs.

That meant I was getting by financially, actually I was doing alright. I had money in the bank, in fact I had saved enough that I didn't have to busk if I didn't want to.

Nights were lonely without my Molly, I missed her, I missed her a lot and I often cursed myself for letting things get out of hand. If I had just accepted her casual sex approach would it have been that bad? Should I have just accepted it? Maybe she was right...maybe I would have enjoyed a tryst with Gloria? All questions I couldn't answer. It was time to accept and move on.