Master Yoshi

She continued, "Of course I started to tell him it was, but he interrupted me and said he's a mandatory reporter, so if I have things that might have happened that I don't want the cops to know about, he could refer me to some people that could keep confidences better. I really liked him for that, he was worried about me."

"What'd you say?"

"I laughed and said, sir, the traumatic event was living in that house - growing up there in the first place. I said that my 'trauma' there was the bad stuff, for sure - but I'm on cloud-9 knowing I'm safe, and Married, and OUTa-there!"

There was some noise in response and someone asked, "What'd he say to that?"

She imitated his low odd voice, "I believe you said it was Carrie who got married."

We waited.

"Come on, guys! I said, 'Sure, yes, _Legally_, it's Carrie, duh!' She laughed again. 'He didn't know what to do with that. He can't report a crime - there's no crime. He can't report delusion. I know what's real. He can't report depression, I'm obviously happy. He just kind of had to say, 'Oh. Okay.'"

We laughed, too.

Joanie turned to me and said, 'He's gonna pull you out of gym, and then Carrie, too, today. I bet."

Discussion at the table turned to whether he'd report someone if they were on the football team and we were winning, or not. So much of the school pride was wrapped up in that.

As the day before, Joanie snuggled up by my side and we ate lunch in close proximity somewhat to the detriment of me getting food into my mouth.

== ==

Getting home that night from practice, we were again delighted to discover home-cooked food courtesy of Tallia's capable kitchen-ing.

As we walked in from school, I saw all our packed boxes were GONE from the front hall.

Tallia was in the kitchen, but she came out and explained she'd taken them to the consignment lady, who she said ran a great operation with four employees, carefully tracking each item so there was an audit trail.

I admit, I'd panicked when I saw the boxes missing.

Happily, I got back to my normal routine of showering just after I got home. I hated being stinky all evening until bedtime. Along the way, we discovered that if Carrie turns on the master bath shower at the same time I'm in the hall shower, and possibly the washing machine is going also, there's a problem with the water pressure.

I got out and came in to find Joanie and Carrie talking in the bathroom and we shouted back and forth about our dueling water knobs.

It was fun to laugh at, and I'd taken lots of cold showers growing up since our water heater was electric and Zeke turned it off some months, 'so we could cut down on electricity costs.'

After dinner, Jane texted, then came over to help get stuff handled, meaning doing dishes, then pictures and packing. I was happy we could be all in the same place for once, and they had a good banter that had nothing to do with me, at least that's how it seemed when I came upstairs or downstairs intermittently from packing the basement and spare room stuff.

Brian's dad stopped by about 8 to look over what was happening, and was thrilled to see progress on a project that he described as 'daunting'. Tallia gave him the consignment lady's info so he'd be more comfortable.

He'd grown up in that house.

We went downstairs briefly right before he left and he showed me how the furnace worked (it had been set too low) and admitted there was no air conditioning except some window units stacked on shelving. It wasn't great, he said, even being in mountain air there were plenty of days growing up he was so desperate for cool air he slept in the basement despite his fear of spiders.

The basement did have spiderwebs, but not a lot of them. Mostly it had a lot of rusty tools and boxes of other figurines that his mom, who was kind of obsessed, had gotten at swap meets and antique stores far and wide.

The way he said this gave me a hint that he had to endure a huge set of hassles growing up, going into every single antique store, on every trip, to check their collections.

I was just envious of having gone on a vacation! I smiled, though.

Everyone had their own family weirdness, I had known that, technically, but it felt odd as a new 'grown-up' to get insights into how other families had oddities, too.

After he left, Jane took me aside and we went up to the hallway bedroom for privacy.

Jane asked, "Kev. Have you told them [Joanie and Carrie] about Tallia yet? Have you talked with Tallia?"

I shrugged and kept my voice down, we were far from them upstairs but it seemed prudent. "I tried to say thank you, like a LOT thank you, uh, at breakfast...?" I was struggling. "I... totally don't know how to deal. Tallia was just this girl I knew, not really a cousin. We didn't eat over there that often..."

"She came to live with us, in that trailer, for a reason, Kevin."

"...? Whut?"

"You are SOOOO oblivious!! I didn't want to say anything. I thought you knew and were trying to play it cool, for so long, but then there'd be times when you could have dropped a hint and you didn't. Or, times when you DID say something sweet, and then just act like it was an appreciation of a normal kindness. God, you're so dense!"

I thought.

"She's always been shy around me, I got that, but..."

"That's not being shy, Kevin."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"'Cuz you're a fucking pain in the ass, that's why. Snoopy, getting in my stuff, moving things around. Like I didn't notice. Finally, though, in the last year or so, not so much, so I've started to kind of let that go."

I looked at her sideways. "I ... don't look through your stuff. I guess, I got dishes out of your room sometimes, when Brenda yelled, but... "

"What about all my underwear under your mattress?'

I burst out laughing. "Ha!!! They wouldn't even fit me! What the hell would I want with your stinky underwear?" The whole idea was sooo funny. "You sure they were your underwear? They might have been dollhouse doilies. Or... maybe it's the underpants gnomes Secret Hideaway!"

I kept laughing, but she got this horrified look on her face. "If _you_ didn't steal them, why were they under your mattress? When I ran low I knew, I just had to get them out and do a load of laundry from there."

I was puzzled. "This happened more than once?"

Her eyebrows went up, "It was a ...Thing, Kev. I was always pissed at you. I mean, I kind of got it, at one level, sure. Snoopy brother. I have friends at school, their brothers are into odd crap. One girl, her brother stole her high heel shoes to try walking in them and broke a heel. She was Seriously Pissed. He tried saying he "tripped over it" - they were in a box in her closet."

We laughed, but Jane was still confused, until she looked at me and pointed at nowhere in particular, "Fuckin' Zeke!"

I thought about it. Zeke lived in the front room for a couple of years, sure, but Brenda was in the master bedroom, they were always fighting. "Sure, but... could have been Brenda, trying to get you angry with me, or if that failed, blame it on Zeke. She hated Zeke, too. She hates everybody."

We just stood there.

She looked at me, sighed, and then gave me a hug. "Kev, I am SOOOOOO sorry. I've been thinking you were a pervert underwear thief for like four years."

I accepted the hug, and kissed her on the side-top of the head from our height difference.

After we unhugged, I fessed up, "I am a pervert, really. Kinda. I admit I might have some familiarity with _prohhhhn_." I said it oddly to take the power out of the word and admit weakness... Or something.

"OH, I know about that. Sometimes the sound bleeds out of your headphones and your bedframe knocks. That's not a problem. Everybody's brother does that."

"You talk about this?"

"What do you think girls talk about?"

I laughed, "The Jazz, and the Cougars, and the Utes, and ..."

She laughed with me. "Uh... No." Considering, she said, "Really, I shouldn't say that. Guys aren't really that common, as topics go? Sure, it's a, 'my brother is so disgusting...' thing sometimes, but usually it's who's doing what, where, and classes, and where we're going to college - those of us that can afford it, or want to, I guess."

"Who wouldn't want to?"

"Tallia. She graduated. She's here."

I was confused. "She got great grades, I know that, she talked about it, didn't she?"

"Yep. 1310 on the SAT. She got into BYU, she told me, but she didn't go. She said she had 'her alterations business'. I'm pretty sure that was code."

"For?"

"A chance at you."

I was silent. This was a lot to take in. "You're not catching me in a calm week, you know that, right?"

"Come on. We've been gone too long. You have to tell her. Or, tell them."

"Tell them what?"

"If you like Tallia."

I stopped. "Of course I like Tallia." I thought about it, and tried to say what I might feel out loud, to test it. Sure, I'd kind of had it back of mind, but not... seriously, as a possible thing.

I said, "I love Tallia?"

She waited.

It was dawning on me. "I think... I think I've always loved Tallia. Girl Next Door.... Osananajimi. [childhood friend]. I could kick myself. I'm a fuckin' idiot."

Jane knew the Japanese. "Yeah, Kev. Except, now you're Married."

"Bernie Owens has a big family...?"

She looked at me oddly. "You'd best not joke about that, mister bigamist. And, his ex-wives live down the road from each other, not in the same house. I think he made them move there, bought 'em double-wides and said, this or nothing, kinda thing. They're famously angry at each other, but he makes it work. Almost makes sense, and then it doesn't. For him."

"I have no idea..."

"How big an ass you are?"

"How do I apologize for not..." I thought a moment. "I guess, I'd apologize for not knowing I could return that affection?"

"Something like that. I can't tell you what to do, I have NO idea. But, it better be good. If you hurt her, I'm gonna have some grave-dancing to do, or maybe you'd like a viking funeral?"

I was calm but worried. "Funny. I'd never hurt her. I do. I love her. She's been devoted to me, and I just figured it was some kind of ... housekeeping habits or something."

Jane shook her head.

"I'll think of something."

"Talk to your wives, maybe."

"Would that be fair?"

"Tell them the Complete Truth, Kev. Complete. Lies and fear and hate got us all into big messes, we have to just... dump it all out, all the Love. In the open. Be happy. This is a good thing."

"I'm an idiot."

"Think about it. We can talk tomorrow, more, maybe."

"I love you, sis." I said it out loud.

"Love you, too, Kev. Bro-Kev." She smiled. "Let's get back."

I nodded and pulled the door open more.

And...

There were Joanie and Carrie.

Leaning against the wall.

Jane gave a little scream of surprise, and I was kinda freaked, too.

They'd heard everything.

"Uh..."

Carrie was calm, though her eyes were wet, tears on her face. She came and gave me a hug, silent, and Joanie, in an odd move I thought, gave Jane a hug, too.

They switched and we got second hugs, then they pulled us over to the master bedroom and shut the door.

We kind of stood there. There was a stiff, formal chair with an odd seat that dented in abruptly as you sat in it, behind the door. I was just uncomfortable enough already that I sat in it.

Carrie looked with a half smile at Jane. "I grew up in a house where secrets meant possible beatings or sudden banishment with no food for a few days. I had to listen in so I knew when to grab emergency pocket food. You get a sixth sense for these things, when they're going to happen. I saw you walk upstairs, Jane, I knew, 'she's gonna talk with Kevin. I'd better hear this.'"

It made sense. I didn't fault her for it - old habits. "Sooo. Okay?"

Jane said, "Ah... So you heard...?"

"I heard two siblings learning they had been tricked into hating each other, probably for years. I'm guessing this isn't the only thing, who, Brenda? Zeke? They did a number on you."

She was probably right on that. My mind was still reeling.

Carrie said, "Kevin... Sir... You - you can't let this be. And don't say one thing in private and another in public, you're better than that." She smiled at me, glanced at Joanie, and said, "This isn't going to get resolved tonight. Or, really, in the next week, probably. You'd best figure though, you have to tell her how you feel, say, by next week this time."

Joanie nodded, went over to the window and sighed, then went in and hugged Carrie, tightly, mouth ear to ear.

Carrie considered something, then said out loud, "Yes."

Joanie had more tears, but she was half-smiling, tenderly. "Give her options. Sir."

Jane half-whispered, "What's with the 'sir' stuff?"

Carrie said as an aside, "Long story. Joanie and I decided a while back on what our rules would be for the first two weeks. Not Kevin's decision."

"Ah."

My head was wrapping around this, but too slowly. "I'm kind of an idiot, Joanie."

Jane gave me a quick hug.

Joanie said to me, not as confrontation, but as a helpful think-this-through: "Option one. You stay with us. Option two. You stay with us for a while, then dump us and marry Tallia. Option three, we add Tallia. Option four, you're a dick, so we steal Tallia from you, marry each other, dump you and the three of us move to Ecuador."

I thought about those options.

Jane added, to be funny, "Or, you're secretly a gay trans Japanese underwear thief."

Carrie asked, "Yeah, what's the deal with the Japanese? You into anime?"

I laughed, "Mom was Japanese by birth, moved here when she was in high school. She married dad, we were born here. She spoke it with us growing up, so we're mostly fluent."

Joanie reminded me: "Tallia. Options."

I looked at the girls, ignoring Jane for the moment, "I got you two. The only options - living arrangements wise - that get my vote include both of you, and Tallia." I looked at Jane. "And, you, but I'm not marrying you. Even if you are really pretty."

Jane was leaning on the dresser next to me, and moved her hand and I thought she might be punching me in the shoulder. Instead - she rested it there. "I love you, too, Kev."

I stood up and gave her a hug, and we did hugs all around, then went downstairs, tracking down Tallia. She was in the basement folding a big pile of laundry.

We all pitched in for a half hour and got it folded and carried upstairs.

Jane left, and somehow we managed to get up to the bedroom to head for bed.

On my way, I made sure to hug Tallia tighter than normal and say thank you for all that she was doing, and that if she wanted to take a day off and just sit around and watch TV, she could and should.

Her laugh was fun, and I caught her eye, which wasn't always easy since she tended to not look directly at me that often.

The girls gave her hugs goodnight, too, and we went upstairs to brush teeth and head to bed.

Once the bedroom door was shut behind me, the girls started stripping off, though they left underwear on.

Carrie pointed at my underwear and casually said, "You won't need those."

I laughed, but then she said, "No, really. Rules are, tonight, you're showing us what you can do."

"Yeah. Do."

They turned the light off and we got in bed, though I dropped my underwear before we got in.

It almost worked.

"Underwear should be put on your dresser, dude. I don't want to trip on it in the middle of the night and accidentally fall face-first onto your cock."

I laughed, "Uh... wait. Let me drop some more underwear on the floor real quick."

We were giggling as we crawled in close together.

Joanie said, "Face me? We flipped a coin on this. It's you and me tonight, Carrie's going to be hanging around and giving pointers. First, we noticed you are 'frustrated'."

My sigh was heartfelt. "Oh, boy."

"In a house with three women, none of whom are giving you anything more than the outside edges, well, yeah. And, you were poking us off and on all night last night. We worked it out, you can't have gotten any satisfaction since at least last friday."

"Longer than that - and... I usually... it's closer to every other day for me."

"I almost asked Jane today, but, yeah, so..." She put her hand on my chest. "Mrs. Foster in the Library, when it looked like we were going to get pushed into something far away and desperate, I asked her for some pointers for 'how to keep a man happy' and how to 'avoid surprises'. She had some... wow, amazing things to say. But, she said you guys fall asleep like clockwork right after you come, so don't get offended."

I shrugged, "True enough, I guess. It's how I get to sleep if I'm tired but can't nod off."

"She also said, even if I found it disgusting, I had to try to get the guy to 'go down', on me. She said that was because if not, 'the power is always going to be distorted.' But, she said I had to teach them - my man - out loud, with very specific instructions, what to do down there. Because, she said, 'men are idiots' - and I'm sorry I have to quote her on that, sir."

"Eh, yeah, we kind of are, about girl stuff at least, or... whatever."

"Whatever is right, and girl stuff is right. It might be girl stuff. We didn't have access to the web much outside school, but rumors are, you can see Everything in videos, like, inside and all that... So, do you want to learn? Are you... willing? Or, is it disgusting for you? Where are you on..."

She didn't finish, I didn't let her. "I'm Absolutely okay with it! I'd love to get a chance to explore, well - YOU. If... that's okay."

Pulling me in to kiss and mumble an assent, she took her hands off me long enough to push down her underwear. "...And... ohhh, I love your kisses ... you should know. We're not going all the way until ... what, day after tomorrow? So, we'll, well, I'll, get you some release tonight, and Carrie will tomorrow night, and then the night after, you flip the coin. Do I have your promise?"

I was confused, "Promise? Sure, I promise to follow your lead. Duh. I'm not going to 'accidentally' make love with you, Joanie."

"Thank you, sir."

She leaned in again and kissed me, which I interrupted with a, "You're welcome, ma'am," and she made a yummy sound.

I kissed her lips, and her cheeks, and then down her chest as she shifted to lie flat. Working my way across her chest to her breast, I let my hands caress, but that generated incredible laughter and an urgency to not tickle.

Complying with that, I tried some stuff and she told me to start again but from the underside, or the outside, and not focus so much on the nipple, or to come at it and go away and come back, etc.

After nosing around and cupping it, pressing the softness into a shape she said, 'too gentle, be more firm, assertive, make it do what you want.'

I could do that.

"Other side."

I moved over and did the same things, better this time because I'd had the first one to be told with. My hips were down and out of the way so I didn't 'poke' her, so to speak, and all the soft luxuriant skin just put me in heaven.

She pushed my head down, and she gave me clear thoughts, where to kiss, and how. Her stomach was (by convulsions of want) hard or soft, situps and workouts obviously had done some shaping there.

I kept going, and found her mons was a hard rise with a low, rough patch on it, and shaved around that, though quite a few bits were missed. I didn't guess she had much experience shaving there, and she'd said she regularly didn't have hot water growing up, so shaving would have been a luxury.

My porn experience was extensive, so I knew my way around, theoretically, but didn't have any idea what the aroma or taste would be like, and Yes, That Was Good. I kissed around it, having watched the gentle-versions of porn, and the ones where it wasn't wham-bam. She didn't have to give me many pointers after all.