Maximum Badonkadonk Ch. 14

"Hey man, did you whup my sister with a belt?"

"Yeah, I did."

"Oh you ain't worried about me no more cause we threw hands nigga?" His posture behind the wheel was relaxed, but that was no indication of what Demon might do if triggered.

"She was sitting on my porch when I got home from work; that was right after she tried to kill me nigga. Fuck, both of you motherfuckers were gonna take me out! Shit man, what're we talking for anyway?!!"

"Calm the fuck down; she's sorry about that shit."

"SORRY?!!" I was close to punching him in the face on general principal as he rubbed his chin deep in thought.

"I should shoot that old nigga for fucking my sister, huh?"

"NO DEMON!! SHIT MAN, JUST CUT IT OUT!! Do you just kill everybody who fucks with you, huh?" Demon started laughing again as I noticed his prominent canines.

This was fucking scary to the uninitiated, but we were well acquainted at this point.

"At least I ain't whining like a bitch; but Tressie is messed up over that old ass fool. I wished she kept doing her bullshit secret clubhouse so I could've kept an eye on her proper. I should fuck that old nigga's daughter for payback and shit!! She got some big ass titties!!"

"Hey man, just pull over so we can knuckle up."

"That's your girl or something, nigga?!"

"Well, can't you be more constructive instead of taking that shit to the extreme all the time? I'm blasted out just listening to you man."

"Okay bruh, tell me where they live and I'll just rob the place."

"No."

"WHAT YOU WANT ME TO DO THEN; HAVE COOKIES WITH THE CHESTER WHO WAS FUCKING MY SISTER?!!"

"Just bring it down a notch."

"Ransacking that nigga's crib is about as far down the ladder as I go. You know how jacked up it is to come home and find all your shit gone like you moved the fuck out?"

"You can do something like that by yourself?"

"Man, I got people nigga!"

"Tell you what; Mr. Gilbert ain't responsible for that shit so you can get his name off your fucking list. We need to find the motherfucker who was texting shit from my website to your sister. Then, you two can do what you want with that nigga. Me right now; I'm about to get booted out of my crib for this shit because my mother thinks I was fucking Tressie."

"You WAS FUCKING Tressie, nigga!"

"Yeah but not recently." I replied innocuously instantly regretting it when Demon brandished a gun pointed at my face.

"GET YOUR ASS IN HERE!"

I didn't hesitate getting inside as Demon sped up the block hitting two sharp right turns into a narrow congested alleyway speeding down it until we were sitting behind the Fisher homestead. Demon looked over surprised that I was unbothered sitting beside him and a loaded weapon.

"Hey bruh, mom and her old bitches crew having some kind of powwow because my sister is uhm, unfit for duty. Why don't you hang out back here for a minute; if I get my sister, will you talk to her?"

"You guys ain't gonna try to take me out again, are you?"

"Nigga you'd be in the trunk already if that was true." Demon snickered while I stared at him unamused.

Whether he knew it or not, his unconditional love for his sister made him that much more human. Observing them together had gone a long way towards melting away some of his criminal mystique.

"Hey man, what's up with her?"

"Nothing, she's just out of it, don't barely get out of bed and when she does, looks out the window all day. We have to yell at her to bathe and eat; pretty fucked up over an old nigga, huh?"

"He ain't doing so well either."

"Where he live at; I'll go talk to him." Demon asked with a glint in his eye.

"Ha ha very funny motherfucker." He got out of his car slamming the door leaving me behind with the keys still in the ignition.

After a few moments I became apprehensive realizing I was sitting in the car of a criminal worried the cops might show up and "mistake" me for him. I thought to get out of his Monte Carlo, but hesitated thinking Demon might be offended. Just as I was getting ready to step out of the car Demon appeared at the back gate next to his garage waving me over.

"Keep it down, those old biddies are already having their mafia meeting to see who's gonna replace Tressie; sounds like they're gonna come to blows or something in there."

"What about the youth council?"

"They trashing that shit straight up." Demon didn't miss a beat.

"Probably about the money anyway; more for the pot between those greedy old folk. "

We walked a short pathway bordered by the garage on one side and a meticulously tended rock garden on the other. The backyard ahead was spacious and well kept with a classic backyard swing off to the side under a tree.

Tressie was sitting there sort of hunched over staring blankly off into space. She was wearing a housecoat with her hair looking ratty all over her head as I cautiously approached.

Demon hung back walking to the other side of the yard near the back of the house.

"Hey girl, I came to see how you're doing; what's up Tressie?"

Her feet were bare and dirty while her gaze was focused on the grass below them. She was still very fetching without any makeup to speak of but was noticeably ashen in the face about the lips.

"Did you come to whup me some more?" She replied flatly devoid of emotion.

"No, I'm worried."

"Why? I was going to do something really bad to you that morning; you have no idea what I can do when I'm angry. It scares me honestly, and you should've turned me in to the police. Why didn't you do that? Don't you know I need more than a whupping? I'm trash and God hates me."

She still wasn't looking at my face, only down at the grass.

"You know that's not true."

"Oh isn't it? I was so mad about being with Pastor Grey against my will and all the nasty things he did to me and mine in that church. I just wanted revenge because they didn't care about me; traded my tits, my ass and my goddamn womb for baubles and clout. My mother got what she wanted, fuck me and my stolen virginity."

"Maybe you could talk to somebody about it, like a professional."

"Careful, you don't wanna end up in Demon's trunk."

"I ain't gonna end up in Demon's fucking trunk." I glanced across the yard finding her brother staring at our exchange pensively. It dawned on me that he might not be all that altruistic probably worried he'd be implicated in a crime.

"Why're you here?"

"I want to help."

"Can you bring William to me? That's the only thing I want in the world. You know, we fell in love that first day. Then he was so scared of me and what he was feeling already when you sent me over there for his daughter Charity. It just happened out of nowhere; we were making passionate love and I couldn't stop thinking about him after that. I would've killed Charity the day she found us together; wanted it that bad. Wanted him that bad, you know?"

"I know Tressie."

"No you don't." She sounded angry but still looked the same.

"Yes, I do."

"I thought you gave a shit about my cousin Vicky; but you just went on with your life while she's locked away."

"You know that shit ain't true; don't you ever say that to me again Tressie. I didn't wanna let her go that night, but she got into that car with Bentley and he drove her straight to the cops. I'm on a fucking jihad against the bitch that caused that shit and you tried to murder me because things didn't work out for you!! I didn't make Mr. Gilbert dump you, but you tried to kill me bitch. Don't tell me how I felt about Vicky when she's about to get out and get a new lease on life!! Your fucking family didn't give a shit about her; look how you living when she was living in a slum! Don't lie and say you weren't gonna find Charity and take her down into that freeway underpass too!"

Tressie Fisher started to tremble looking crazed as I ranted out of righteous indignation. She subtly calmed herself staring at me starting to breathe through her mouth.

"Wanna fuck?"

I didn't know what to say but had an epiphany pulling out my phone instead aiming its camera at her face.

"Talk to me Tressie; tell me about William."

"You don't care."

"Tressie, talk to William." Her eyes lit up as she looked deep into the camera on my phone breathing hard, palm flattened against her bosom.

"I'm in love with you; really in love with you so much that I'll never feel this way about anyone again. I'm not perfect, far from it honestly as the lord is my witness. You, don't have to worry about me leaving you when time intrudes because I'll never leave your side. William, I'm dying inside without you and whether you realize it or not, I'm in the fight of my life. I grew up in the church and it nearly killed me, perverted me into something I'll never stop being ashamed of. You make me whole and I do the same for you William. I know I don't have to tell you how much I love you because you can feel it even now. I feel you inside and we're dying without each other. I love you."

Tressie Fisher didn't speak after that but I let the camera run for effect.

"Come on sis, I'll take you back to your room." Demon appeared in frame handling his sibling with kid gloves. I filmed them walking out of frame watching as he led Tressie to the back door.

Two minutes after they disappeared inside the house, I started to put my camera away drifting towards their back porch feeling the lingering emotional fallout from Tressie's candid confessional.

I intended to leave by walking alongside the house to lose Demon because my next stop was Charity Gilbert's house. I pulled up her social media finding some pics of her with Jayson which indicated he was still around from the timestamps. Mr. Gilbert was effectively home alone.

"I know none of yall don't want me back; I understand the situation but you ain't got nobody else, ain't got nobody better to take over. I ain't trying to shake the tree but all of you need to remember what it is when the pastor is calling the shots."

I found myself standing under the high window sill adjacent to the front room on the other side of the wall.

"You ain't got no problem going somewhere you been shamed? Everybody knows how it went down with that dirty ass Pastor Bentley; you know his grandson is a member of the church now, huh? What you gonna tell him about getting his family disgraced like that?"

This woman had an annoying high pitched bird voice, but I wasn't focusing on that as another unseen elderly woman spoke up.

"Pastor Bentley had a couple of bad turns, that there last stroke got him up in the old folks home now; his people don't even visit him there sistah; the strain of well, everything got to him and you sitting here in front of us trying to get your spot back."

This was intense stuff piquing my curiosity, but I was still focused on a single voice. There was a long pause and silence as I glanced down finding an errant cinderblock tossed to the side of the adjacent rock garden bordering the inside of the Fisher backyard.

"I ain't trying to get nothing back. I ain't never left from that church and I'll have you know I was on one of them there sabbaticals. You trying to call me out for some shit that ain't my fault and as I sit here looking around at your faces, none of yall is squeaky clean. Ain't that right Sister Fisher?!! What about you Flora? Melvina, ain't you done got your wrinkled cheeks clapped alongside your high school aged niece?! You came to me in confidence, remember that shit? Now about Pastor Bentley; none of that bullshit matters unless you wanna blame the uh, victim! He saw what he wanted, and he took it!! Play stupid games, get stupid motherfucking prizes! Nigga wanted what I'm sitting on and he took a whole lot of it until he done give himself that stroke!!"

I'd managed to right the cinderblock clambering atop it precariously only able to barely get a glimpse into the adjacent room through the heavily screened window. I found myself peering into a side parlor, sort of a dining room. The scene was decidedly intense with a number of recognizable church elders all female sitting in a sort of semi-circle facing one woman.

The back of that woman's head was to me as she was facing Mrs. Fisher flanked on one side by a tall, dark skinned woman and an obese light skinned sister as her right hand. These women were my mother's age and older but gave off a noxious aura of radioactive entitlement. All of them were dressed in these vintage looking dresses, but the woman sitting in front of me inadvertently hiding me from their view, took the cake.

She was wearing one of those ornate church lady hats you saw a lot of elderly black women wearing usually on Easter Sunday, It was angelically white, its wide brim made of some fluffy material that looked like fur or tiny little feathers while the section affixed to her scalp was covered with gleaming white beads.

Her hair was pinned up under it, black and greasy looking with strips of grey intermingled. From my vantage point, this woman had a narrow head and slender neck and shoulders. Her high collared dress matched the ethereal color of her head wear as I managed to get my camera phone focused into the room. It was mostly about catching the entirety of the conversation rather than getting a visual.

"You have no shame." The bird voiced woman opinioned.

"I bet a dollar to high heaven you done visited your nasty self upon our new pastor, ain't that right?"

"What, he didn't like your stank ass?" The lady in white replied in snarling feline fashion with a voice akin or reminiscent of late actress Eartha Kitt. I keyed on it getting a slight migraine nearly toppling the cinderblock.

"YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN SO GODDAMN MEAN!!" Bird lady blurted out dripping emotion.

"Have I ever lied?"

There was another long pause in the room as I got a better vantage point of the conversation. Mrs. Fisher and everyone else in the room were glaring at the woman in white with murderous intent. The tension was palpable enough that I felt it outside the window.

Some of the old ladies were visibly uncomfortable with whatever was being discussed, but the woman at the center of it all was cold as ice. One by one, I watched each of the elders raise a hand in solidarity voting in Tressie Fisher's replacement against their better nature.

"That's what I thought; I'll be seeing you all this Sunday morning."

Some of the women were already hanging their heads as she reached on the adjacent table for an old school parasol. My eyes went wide at the smooth charcoal blackened complexion of the narrow hand picking up the umbrella. Her long nails were pearl white and pointy making the hand resemble something of a feminine claw.

I pressed my camera closer to the window hoping against hope as she slowly stood up revealing a tiny wasp waist followed by the staggering upper swell of a shelf like butt and hips that were obscenely wide. It was the mother of all badonkadunks hidden behind the skintight material of her dress.

She started towards the other side of the room as I lost balance falling to the rough pavement under the window with a loud thud. My heart was thumping wildly in my chest while I embarrassingly sported a tent in my jeans. I was so nervous about being discovered; I went on all fours until I got to the edge of the house bolting out of the backyard.

"Hey bruh, what the fuck were you doing back there?" Demon followed me out as I got a few feet away from his car checking the footage and audio finding it intact.

In my haste to escape detection, I hadn't realized he was watching me clandestinely.

"Hey man, everything's gonna be okay, alright?"

"What happened back there?"

"Man, you gotta trust in the lord my nigga; now drop me at the train station, I'm gonna fix your sister hopefully."

"I can drive you home bruh."

"Nigga drive me to the train station and give me your phone number."

*****************************************************************************************************

Truth be told I didn't trust Demon to take me to Charity Gilbert's house especially after listening to his thoughts about the father daughter duo. I felt like I'd taken enough undeserved bad karma intent on righting the universal apple cart despite developments.

There was no way my relationship with my mother was going back to normal and I shuddered to think what my father would do when informed of my less candid salacious activities. For once I was going head first towards a problem instead of trying to sidestep it. Charity was doing as much by openly killing what might become a big mistake at some point in the future. I rang the doorbell several times before he answered.

"Oh uhm, Charity ain't here; she's out with a friend." Mr. Gilbert looked bad, really bad sporting a five o'clock shadow and disheveled unwashed clothing as he leaned into his doorframe staring at me. The pungent scent of booze was all over his person.

"I don't care about Jayson, he's a tool; I came to see you sir." His eyes widened in the way most wino's did as I recalled Tressie's prophetic words regarding the symbiotic relationship between them.

"WHAT, YOU GOT SOME BUSINESS WITH ME BOY?!!"

"Yeah, and its not about your daughter sir." I answered standing my ground as he used his weight to shove the screen door open nearly hitting me in the process.

"YOU MESSING AROUND WITH MY DAUGHTER?!! THINK YOU GOT SOMETHING GOING ON WITH HER?!! BY THE WAY, I KNEW YOU WASN'T NO GAY, CAUSE YOU TALK FAKE!! YOU FUCK MY DAUGHTER BOY?!!" Yeah Mr. Gilbert was three sheets to the wind coming out on his front porch with the bottle in hand.

"I'm not here for a fight Mr. Gilbert."

"THEN YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE COME OVER HERE BOY!!" He tried to give me a shove, but I dodged it remaining on his stoop. His gait was loose and shaky making me worry that he might tumble to the bottom of his front stairs.

"I came here because Tressie wanted me to deliver something to you sir."

"WHAT?!!" Mr. Gilbert stopped in his tracks, still looking weak and shaky as I got out my phone with Tressie's confessional.

"Don't shoot the messenger Mr. Gilbert." I held the phone up in front of my face with both hands carefully approaching him as he squinted noticing Tressie's frozen image on its face.

I was able to trade my phone for his bottle watching Mr. Gilbert slowly have a seat on his stoop watching the message from his lady love.

"I'm in love with you; really in love with you so much that I'll never feel this way about anyone again. I'm not perfect, far from it honestly as the lord is my witness. You, don't have to worry about me leaving you when time intrudes because I'll never leave your side. William, I'm dying inside without you and whether you realize it or not, I'm in the fight of my life."

I started walking away from his front porch attempting to give the man some privacy. I turned around thinking about my own situation with my parents and eventually Tressie's challenge regarding Vicky Stone. I found the memories hard along with recent revelations as I glanced backward finding Mr. Gilbert sitting there with his face glazed over in perspiration and tears.

I looked around at the surrounding neighborhood then at the bottle in my hand. I used the end of my tee to wipe the mouth of that bottle before taking a healthy swig.

"Mr. Gilbert?" He was sitting there holding my phone like it was his most prized possession. I lingered at the bottom of his stoop noting how similar our homes were in design.

"Yes?" I was reminded of Tressie's emotional state after completing her recorded confession of undying love for this man.

"You love her too, right?"

"How can you ask such a thing kid; you think you're doing some kind of good deed, but it's complicated."

"With all due respect to you and your lovely daughter, I call bullshit. It's a simple question sir; all you have to do, even if you can't say it to my face, is just tell yourself the truth. Do you love Tressie Fisher? I know she loves you man, so there ain't shit standing between you and her."