Memoirs of a Shared Wife Ch. 45

Authors note.

This is the final chapter in this current series of memoirs of a shared wife.

In this chapter I detail how the physical relationship that I'd enjoyed with our special friend Dave came to an end.

In the previous chapters I recounted some of the experiences we, myself, my hubby John and our friend Dave had, as a threesome.

There were a great many more.

However our time together in that way, was limited.

We knew Dave intimately for just over two years and during that time I couldn't imagine things any other way.

Those two years were among the best of my life.

It was bliss.

And then, suddenly, late on in that second year of having Dave as a good friend and lover....along came a certain lady called Becky.

A lady who would change everything and ultimately lead to Dave becoming just a good friend.

It was early october of 2015 when we first started hearing a name that I would soon come to hate....then with acceptance....learn to love.

He met who would turn out to be his present wife, at the gym.

By that time my boyfriend had lost all of the weight he'd wanted to, and in the process, become addicted to keep fit.

He was looking very lean and healthy and perhaps even more gorgeous than when I first set eyes on him during our walking group days.

We began to notice he was talking about this lady friend called Becky...a lot.

They worked out together at the gym you see.

She was a newcomer to the gym scene, shy, nervous and very self conscious.

Dave, being familiar with the gym and all the equipment, routine etc, took her under his wing.

Becky used to be quite plump, but lost much of the weight a long time ago.

She is 2 years younger than me, a little shorter, long dark hair, hazel eyes....and very pretty.

When Dave first met her she had recently divorced.

Anyway, it wasn't long before we noticed Dave making excuses, to avoid coming out with us.

We later learned that he was seeing Becky, but didn't want to hurt our feelings, so made things up.

He knew that I was jealous of her.

Soon he was spending more time with her than with us and it was becoming clear to both myself and John that it was serious between them.

Dave, after years of sharing his friend's wife.... had himself a steady girlfriend.

I suppose it was inevitable that at some point Dave would find that someone special.

Someone he wanted to be with, alone.

Our threesome relationship, although very exciting and fulfilling for us all, had it's flaws.

I am married to John, Dave was my boyfriend.

After we had our fun....did our thing...Dave was the one who went home alone.

He had nobody to call his own.

And it's this basic fact that I at first failed to grasp, letting my jealousy block what should have been obvious to see.

So, initially I acted with hostility towards his new girlfriend.

After having a lengthy discussion with us at our house, in which Dave explained how he felt about Becky.

He tried to arrange a meeting so we could see Becky and judge for ourselves that she really was a nice person.

I flat out refused and in a childish moment stormed out of the room, quite upset.

I suppose I was panicking because I knew what was coming.

Before we knew how serious it was between them, we'd half joked with Dave about Becky joining us for a foursome.

As I say, half joking.

But Dave knew we were half serious too and he shut that idea down right away.

Telling us that Becky just wasn't that kind of girl.

'She's very private when it comes to sex.'....He'd said.

So, if we couldn't have her join us and Dave really was in love?

It was obvious what was going to happen.

I know it seems hypocritical of me to feel jealousy towards Dave's new love interest....after all I'd done.

But in my defense, my 'affairs' were with the consent of both John and Dave.

In Dave's defense....he was in love.

I suppose in a way, so were we, myself and Dave.

Oh I'm not talking about the same kind of love I feel for John, what I have with my hubby is very special.

John is my soulmate.

But I do love Dave, now as a friend and back then as a lover.

Also you have to take into account what my life had been like for the past two years prior to Becky showing up.

I'd been worshipped by both of these big, fit, virile guys.

When we were all together in harmony....oh my....words wouldn't do it justice.

Losing that is what I was afraid of, hence the hostility towards Becky.

As the weeks rolled by we saw less and less of Dave, both intimately and otherwise.

He'd taken my reaction to an 'outsider' spoiling things, badly.

What other way could anyone take it.

It was late november and we hadn't seen Dave for a whole week.

Then, out of the blue he got in touch on the phone and I apologised for my behaviour, relenting to his request that we all go for a drink together, get to know Becky.

My decision influenced by a long talk with John, who as usual could see where I was going wrong.

I'll just explain at this point that at the time this was happening I hadn't been with Dave intimately for a couple of weeks.

So yes, he had been having sex with both myself and Becky.

We'd done it several times since he'd known her, he later told us that this was before he realised how deep his feelings for her were.

Both of them had been badly hurt in the recent past and were being cautious with each other.

Anyway, we did all go out together.

We met Becky.

I must admit, as we chatted that evening in our favourite pub, it was difficult to harbour any ill will towards this woman.

My first impressions of her were very good.

She was clearly shy and nervous about meeting us but once Becky got over this, with the help of a few red wines, the conversation flowed.

There were no awkward silences, we just... clicked.

Much in the same way we had done with Dave, years previously.

Becky was clearly in love with Dave, you could see it whenever she looked at him, and he her.

My hostility towards her receded, revealing what I should have seen in the first place.

It was the right thing to do.... to let Dave go.

And that is exactly what happened....well....kind of.

It is a little more complicated than that.

It's a pity really, she didn't have a more open mind when it came to sex.

As John pointed out, after we became good friends with Becky....it would have been something quite special....the four of us together.

I must admit, I found the idea of my hubby fucking another woman right in front of me.....arousing

Something which did catch me off guard.

Took me by surprise that one.

It had all been about me up to that point in our journey.

However, this was something that would have to wait for another time, and another woman.

Anyway, Dave had the 'talk' with us not long after that first meeting with Becky.

I was prepared for it, knew it was coming, but it still hurt.

Dave made it clear that he didn't want to continue the intimate part of our friendship because he was in love with Becky.

It wouldn't be right.

Simple as that.

There was a lot more to it than that of course, we chatted for a long time, about feelings, tears were shed....mine.

We reminisced about past naughty experiences we'd enjoyed.... together.

There'd be no more of those.

It really was the end of an era.

Or so I thought...

Weeks past, Christmas came and went.

Dave and Becky... very happy together.

John and myself initially had no plans to replace Dave, we were still in mild shock at his sudden absence.

After all that time with someone else joining us, it felt kind of odd being intimate with just the two of us.

Not bad, just.... different. We both felt the same.

It would be some time before we settled back into how it was before Dave.

Meanwhile....

January arrived, a new year, time for a new start.....move on.

My 40th birthday was rapidly approaching.

A big milestone and one that I'd tried hard to ignore.

It's no fun getting older....unless it's done disgracefully, which I fully intended to do.

By that time we had gotten to know Becky well, a kind hearted soul, sensitive, very caring.

Which makes what I'm about to tell you especially difficult.

The lady that I'd initially hated had become one of my best friends, and still is to this day.

And to this day and beyond, she will remain blissfully unaware of my betrayal.

Our betrayal.

We don't talk about it anymore, myself and Dave.

Perhaps in a way, we are pretending it didn't happen.

But it's always there, even all these years later, like a stain that can never be removed....every time I look her in the eyes....

My 40th birthday, began quite innocently.

Breakfast in bed, made by the boys.

I opened cards and presents, with John and my son's gathered around the bed looking on.

A typical mums birthday scene, played out in homes across the country and indeed, the world over.

Perfectly innocent.

As I listened to 'happy birthday' being sung by my loved ones, I was oblivious to what scene would play out in that very same bedroom later in the day.

A...not so innocent scene.

That day I was working afternoons at the store so had my morning free.

Which wasn't entirely good news as I was in the process of painting the kitchen.

John begged me to give it a rest, it was my birthday after all, he would finish it at the weekend, he assured me.

But, I had nothing else to do and I was sick of the kitchen looking a mess, so decided to get on with it.

We had plans for the evening, a family meal out with the boys.

Followed later, John proudly assured me, by some quality 'alone time' with him, where I would be the focus of his full, and complete attention...

So, there I was in the kitchen painting, that fateful morning....alone.

It was late, about 11, when I heard a knock at the door.

Going to answer, thinking it was perhaps a parcel, my aunt usually sent me a little present by post.

But no...it was Dave.

He was brandishing a big bunch of flowers, card, and a wrapped present.

I had spoken to him the previous day by phone, and it was during this conversation he indicated that because of work commitments he would have to see me the day after my birthday.

So, his presence that morning, came as a complete surprise.

He told me that his morning client appointment had been in the vicinity and in driving here from work had to pass by home so he'd called in for my card etc to drop by when he'd finished.

After welcoming him in Dave commented on my appearance and activity.

"You gotta be joking!....he's got you painting on your 40th?"

I explained that it was my idea, while inviting my ex boyfriend inside.

My appearance was not good, I wore dirty old torn jeans and a jumper that used to belong to John and I was covered in paint...you can imagine.

Not sexy.

But what I felt inside?

I was alone for the first time in a long time with a man I had once known very intimately.

We had, until recently, been passionate lovers.

And of course, you can't just turn those feelings off.

When I looked into Dave's eyes, all what had been before, was still there.

I could see it within him, and more importantly, he appeared to acknowledge this... guilty attraction.

Dave was like a cat on hot bricks, jumpy, on edge, nervous.

It was painfully clear that he was fighting it, trying to hide the uncomfortable truth with idle conversation.

When he's nervous I can tell right away, he laughs a lot at things that aren't really funny.

It's a coping mechanism, quite common I'm told.

As we chatted over a coffee, about everyday things, John and the boys, work....Becky.

A very strong urge arose from deep inside me, all consuming.

I had to have him.

I knew it was wrong.

And that is what made it all the more irresistible, forbidden fruit....he belonged to someone else.

Yes, I know, that makes me a bitch right?

My good friends boyfriend?

Yes, I'm pretty sure it does.

But at the time I didn't care. Kind, caring, sweet Becky was pushed right to the back of my mind.

It takes two to tango as they say, but I was the one who started it.

Made my intentions clear.

I recognised that he, was weak...and I took advantage of that.

I made sure that when our eyes met, he could see it....see the passion within me.

I didn't hide it, like he was desperately trying to.

Then, during an awkward silence in the conversation, I reached out and put my hand on his gently squeezing.

He looked up from his coffee mug, initially an anxious look in those dark eyes.

"I've missed you."

I said, with meaning behind it.

Gazing back into him, seeing the struggle within.

Dave looked away, back down at the steaming mug.

"I'm here now aren't I?"

That nervous laugh once more.

Stroking my thumb gently across the back of his hand, my words quiet, gentle, "You know what I mean."

I stared right at him, watching as the smile ebbed from his face, "Pip....I...I can't.... I..."

Interrupting whatever he was going to say next I continued, "Look at me.....Dave?.....look at me.... please."

I knew, as he also, that once we made eye contact again it would be over, his resistance would melt away.

Slowly, Dave lifted his gaze to mine.

And there it was, what I'd been expecting to see, that hungry look... of days gone by.

It may have only lasted a moment, his period of weakness.

We will never know, because my next move was to lean forward across the table and kiss my ex, gently, so sensual, so soft.

My eyes closed, soaking up the sensation.....for I feared being pushed away at any second....

But I wasn't pushed away.

We parted lips briefly, opening my eyes, that look within his gaze still there but now more obvious....more intense.

Suddenly Dave seemed to lunge at me, pushing himself across the table, lips pushed forcibly against mine, hands grasping my head pulling us tighter together.

An intense burning desire, consumed me.

All those urges, pent up desires, everything....it all came to the boil right there at our kitchen table.

Breath came fast through noses as tongues writhed against each other....hearts beat madly....this was it....no going back.

After that intense kiss, I was grabbed by the hand and led off rather willingly, up to the bedroom that Dave knew so well.

There, clothing was shed and we got into the bed, that he knew so well.

And there, between the sheets, after so long an absence, Dave... got into the woman he knew so well.

I recall that I cried out in joy and excitement at feeling him inside me after so long....he felt so familiar....so good.

Neither of us lasted long.

The first time that morning was hurried, powerful and so deeply sensual.

I was pounded to within an inch of my life, my god, I don't think I've ever been fucked as hard as that before or since.

He certainly had missed me, and I him.

After that first one we lay panting, bathed in sweat despite the cold january day.

Words were spoken, soft, gentle.

I told Dave that I'd missed him so much, he.... echoed this feeling for me.

We 'renewed' our special friendship once more that morning, he took his time with me, deep and slow....lots of kissing.

It was just like it had been before...

When it was over, a strange sense of finality hung in the air between us, unspoken, but solid as rock.

What we had enjoyed together was not the beginning of an affair.

But the end.

We, needed that one last time.

A fond farewell.

We both knew instinctively what it meant.

Over time, you get to know how one another think, how they feel.

And so it was with us.

At the expense of guilt and knowledge of betrayal against someone we both cared for dearly, despite that....we needed that one last time.

I never made love with Dave again.

But I'll always have the memory of that final passionate embrace.

And the ever present guilt that goes with it.

Regret? Yes and no.

If I were to go back would I do it again?

Absolutely.

My husband reacted with predictable surprise at our last tango, and along with it.... predictable excitement.

His only regret at what we'd done? His own absence.

He loves to watch you know, my John.

And finally....

Does Becky suspect anything?

Yes and no.

I don't think she suspects we had an affair but I do believe she suspects some history with myself and Dave.

Not long after the pair became an item, Dave told us that Becky asked him if he used to go out with me, perhaps before John?

He replied no, then asked why she would think that?

Becky said that there was something in the way I looked at him.....some spark.... chemistry between us.

All my ex could do was reassure her that she must be seeing things, we are and always have been.....just good friends.

And so there we have it.

After our final fling life went back to normal, whatever that is.

Our friendship with Dave and Becky continues to this day.

Life was pretty quiet for a while, after the physical relationship with Dave ended.

For a little while....

The end.

Epilogue.

As previously mentioned, we are still good friends with Dave and Becky, we see them both regularly, often going out for a drink together.

They got married a few years back, after Dave's divorce from Tina.

I was maid of honour, John the best man.

Dave still takes an avid interest in our continuing, secret lifestyle.

We often have a catch up at our house where we talk about what we've been up to.

I think maybe, he misses not being able to join us on our naughty adventures.

But, the love of a good woman is important and Becky unfortunately, is a one man woman.

Authors note.

Thank you to all the positive comments and feedback I've received.

I'm so pleased that my memoirs are being enjoyed.

I'm going to take a short break but I'll be back with some more of our adventures in the near future.

Things didn't stay quiet for long...