All Comments on 'Mid Morning Snack'

Missed the grammar mistakes. 😂 man i cant imagine people who lose their wood over grammar. Long stories have their place, but short simple scenes are great too. Enjoyed it.

for your first effort It was a bit short and sort of left me hanging. I think this could be a very sexy story if you develop it a bit more. Give us some details of these people as to what they look like, what they do for a living.

Most of all ignore the anon critics they do that for every story they read. Some just don't understand this is a fantasy world and most of the authors are just ordinary people telling a story.

Everyone was missing the reviewer who doesn't think a story like this is finished until all the women are pregnant. Actually, he/she/it wasn't missed at all. This stuff is for fun, not procreation!

I think you need to write more about the night before and maybe he can get all 3 sisters and their mother pregnant.

Ten paragraphs and you call this a story? Along with the shitty grammar?

Stop writing.

Sorry, the really poor grammar killed it, and not in the good way.