Monogamish - Bachelorette Party Day 01

"I just had a call of nature, guys," she complained.

"Oh, sure," Patty taunted. "We all know what kind of call."

"The kind where I have to pee like a racehorse," Jenn snapped.

"Then why did your shirt-sucker also disappear?" Paula asked pointedly.

"He's gone?" Jenn asked, suddenly looking a little forlorn.

Kerrie, and her great big titties were a hit as well. All my friends were getting attention.

I... I was in high demand. I was the bachelorette, after all.

Two swarthily delicious guys, Arabs I thought, though they might have been Sicilian, waved twenties at me, and I found two guys simultaneously sucking candies off my breasts. Neither went for the ones on my nipples, but I was still quivering in delight.

They both pulled back and smiled at me. "Enjoy the tasting guys?" I asked with a sly smile.

"Actually," the one guy said, pulling out another five, "I think I'd prefer an orange flavored one."

The second guy saw that, and watched his buddy sucking on an orange candy right along the edge of my cleavage. His nose tickled my bare skin. Yes, did I mention that I had cut the crew neck wide open on my teeshirt, leaving me with some serious cleavage? The second guy flipped me a twenty and held up two fingers inquiringly. I just nodded.

Ballsy sonofabitch just bit a candy off my tits, one from each.

Over across the bar, I saw that Paula had completely lost the 'fund-raising' thread of the process. Some guy had her pushed up against a pillar and was sucking on her nipple right through the teeshirt, and there was no candy there...

Noor saved us in that bar, calling out, "Time to go, ladies!"

We collected ourselves and headed out.

We went down Bourbon Street, secreting money and reattaching LifeSavers. We attracted followers who trailed along behind us.

Jenn in particular, after her earlier insecurities, was in her element. She was not swarmed by the most guys, but the number who did want to put their lips on her torso had her feeling... dangerous. Linda and I and Melody all agreed to make sure she didn't do anything... stupider than the rest of us.

We found ourselves in a... bar-themed bar, I guess? It was meticulously decorated to look exactly like a place that... sold booze. The current inhabitants, twigged in part by the entourage that was following us, started moving in on our group. Drinks were bought, of course.

I found myself with that rarest of beasts, a ten-dollar bill being waved in my face. In the blur of the moment, I took it and said, essentially, be my guest.

In a moment, I found a pair of lips affixing themselves to the inner curve of my right breast. A candy popped free and the lips remained in place, doing things that felt nice.

I looked down and saw a balding pate bent over my chest. I smiled. Whoever this guy was, he knew how to do this right. He pulled free at last, and smiled up at me.

It hit me.

"From the plane," I breathed.

He smiled again, and nodded. Jesus, did this guy go from zero to studly with the simple curl of his lips and wrinkle in his eyes.

"I can't believe I ran into you again," he said softly, almost too softly for me to hear over the music.

"And yet, here you are. And now I am too," I said with southern sweetness I do not legitimately possess.

"Actually, I saw you three bars back. I've been among those following along."

"Wait. You haven't said hi to me before now?" I asked, confused.

"You have some delicious friends," he said simply. Well... I couldn't argue with that. "But I have been waiting until you weren't swarmed. You were lovely on the plane. You are excruciatingly hot now," he said.

Really?

He was forty-five, easy. He was balding. He was... he was hung like a horse, I somehow just knew it. The mind will convince you of many things.

This was a fine man. Not what I was expecting, but I wanted something wild, right? I could go fuck this guy right now. I was allowed. It would be fun.

"I'm not going to fuck you, you know," I whispered in his ear.

He jerked back, both shocked at the idea and suddenly distraught over it. "I... I... I didn't mean to..." he stammered. What a sweetie.

"But you did buy five sucks, and you've only had the one so far," I added, winking at him blatantly.

There was that sly smile again. It was sexier even than the sweet one.

He bent down again, and nibbled a green ring off the upper curve of my right breast. His lips again did nice things for a second or two. "Ahem, that's two," I warned teasingly. He pulled back and smiled not-so-apologetically.

With three and four, he was good, mostly. He bent further down so he could tilt his head up to bite candies off the undersides of each boob, but he didn't take any more long liberties with each, drat him.

He had one left. He eyed me, and I realized that the two of us had attracted a small audience, despite all the other activity around me. Linda and Melody and Noor, along with assorted pervs were watching. I wanted to make sure our flying companion's last candy was a really good suck, for him and the audience.

I pointed at a red ring, clinging barely to the side of my stomach, halfway to my waist. "That one for number five," I said assertively.

He looked at it for a moment, not excited. But he shrugged ruefully and started to lean in again.

"Oh wait," I said, stopping him. "It fell off," I said, plucking it free myself. "Let me just reset it." With that, I hunched my shoulders forward, pressing my tits together, and placed the candy right in the press of my bare cleavage. It stuck there easily with the slight sheen of perspiration everyone has on Bourbon Street on a warm, pleasant, party evening.

Now he showed me a wolfish smile. Was I really not going to fuck this guy?

He bent in and just buried his face in-between my tits. His tongue leapt out and delved into the press, chasing the candy, which he had shoved deeper in his eagerness. I just wiggled my chest and motor-boated him thoroughly.

As his tongue finally corralled the sweet, I slid one hand up the front of his trousers and cupped his bulge briefly. He was not hung as hugely as I had fantasized, but this old guy was still packing nicely. It was a shame I was going to have to blue-ball him. And I was definitely going to blue-ball him, I realized with an internal apology. I was not ready to start getting up close and personal, the game was too fun for now.

I settled for giving that bulge a comprehensive grope before I stepped back. "It was a pleasure flying with you," I said softly.

"All mine," he replied, and was suddenly lost in the press of the crowd, and of guys stepping up for a turn. Linda and Noor just stared at me with amazed looks, even though Linda had a guy getting his two bucks worth at the moment.

Melody just looked at my altered tee, and turned to the bartender. After a moment, she turned back with a pair of bar scissors.

"Careful, Mel," Linda said. "We are a long way from the hotel."

"Five thousand dollar strip club bill," she said firmly. "We are still making the payments." With that, she cut the neckline of her shirt downward in three big snips, making a single straight cut. When she turned back from returning the scissors, she had a ragged gap right down between her tits. It opened wide, then almost closed with each excited breath she took.

None of my other friends had the balls to join us in the cleavage club, and amazingly, as we headed out and to the next bar, it did not seem to make much difference in our relative candy popularity.

The next bar had an all-female staff, and they were dressed outright scantily. Like, underwear scanty. We didn't stay long there. We realized quickly that we were cutting into their tips, and that was not something we wanted to do. At other bars, bartenders were making bank just on the tips from making change.

We pulled into a clot out in the street between bars and shared a laugh while we re-applied fresh tape and candies.

"I can't believe that I am doing this," Noor groaned. Her large, dark nipples tenting her teeshirt and even showing through slightly with the sweat, said otherwise. "I must have had a dozen men suck my tits tonight."

"More than that, Noor," Linda said, "for all of us, I think."

Noor's lovely, dusky complexion darkened further. "Are we about done?" she asked suddenly, and we all looked at each other. We had been at this for a while, had drunk a lot, and collected an obscene amount of cash for what was supposed to be a cocktail or two's worth and some laughs. It had been a good evening.

"Well, I still have three rolls of LifeSavers left in my purse," said Linda, holding them up.

The spell was broken. We certainly couldn't head back now, not with candies left! Even our dear (comparatively) conservative Noor shrugged, accepting that unassailable logic.

The next bar that caught our eye was a real hole-in-the-wall type place, whose door was on a side street off the main drag. Jenn saw it first, and called out, "Dive bar!"

We all grinned and swept down the street and through the door.

Yep, Nola dive bar. Bare wood, stained with beer. Badly lit. Plastic cups only, so you could take them with you, and so that no one got cut by glass when a fight broke out. Beat up furniture. Just our kind of place for this evening.

Except...

The music wasn't so loud as we had gotten used to.

Oh, and there wasn't a guy in the place. We did have a lot of women, of various ages and appearances, looking at us appraisingly. We, um, stood out in this crowd. We were a novel thing.

We traded furtive glances, frozen in place at the door. We didn't quite know what to do. This was not our target market, or the vibe we were looking for, but we didn't want to look like a bunch of nards either, which we would have, if we had immediately fled. Our feet still itched. Mine sure did.

"Oh wow, a bachelorette party!" someone called out. "Awesome!"

"Congratulations," a pretty brunette said, getting off her seat to approach us. "Which two of you are getting married?"

"I... uh, I am the bride," I said, my voice firming. "But, um, my man is in Las Vegas tonight."

"Right on," someone said, and there were a few cheers.

"Hey, Marla," a clear voice called out over the crowd. It came from a really hot-looking older woman, who had a tiny, very young, asian girl under her arm. "A round of shots for the bride and her pussy posse!"

Marla the bartender looked at us for a moment. "Tequila?" she asked.

"Oh, yes please," Noor said desperately. I doubt she had seen this many lesbians being lesbian in one place in her life. I was not actually sure that I ever had either.

Marla set up eight shot glasses and poured from a surprisingly high-end bottle. She refilled a bunch of other glasses at the same time. We took our shots and raised them.

"To a long and happy life," the bartender called out with a warm smile in my direction, and slammed back a double of her own. The whole bar drank.

"Not a choice I'd make," a girl muttered in a loud stage whisper.

"Oh hush, Savannah," a girl near her said. "I know you like some dick."

"Not a steady diet," Savannah snapped back.

I had to smile. Honestly, it was a very welcoming environment. But I could tell we all wanted to get back to our fun soon.

"So, what's with the shirts gag?" A short, stacked, multi-tattooed blonde asked, leaning against the bar while waiting for another beer.

"Suck for a Buck... Two Bucks, actually," Linda explained. Amused ears listened all around. Crazily, the weirdest thing about being in this bar was the way the music was so low, you could hear people who weren't shouting. "We are raising drinking money for Amy's honeymoon. Guys give one of us two bucks, and they get to suck a candy off that girl's shirt."

That got a laugh.

One of the butchier-looking women in the crowd asked, "Seriously? You are spending your night out objectifying yourselves like that?" A few women around her kind of wrinkled their noses at her.

I looked straight at her and said levelly, "It's a fucking blast."

She snorted with good natured disapproval and turned away.

"Does it have to be a guy?" a leggy dishpan blonde asked, stepping forward.

I admit, I kind of froze. Um, I mean...

Kerrie saved me. "I don't see a reason it does," she said, with a challenging expression. She heaved a deep breath. Kerrie heaving deep breaths is something of a sight.

The blonde grinned and whipped out the twin singles she already held from behind her back. "Who chooses which one?" she asked archly.

Kerrie, now fully trapped in the game, shook her head. "Buyer's choice," she shrugged.

The blonde pressed the cash into Kerrie's hand and gave a good, long, appraising look at her chest, before bending over and lavishing a long, visible lick on a green candy attached to Kerr's left nipple. Kerry shuddered gently, and the woman opened her mouth, clamped it over the candy and slowly sucked it clear.

Holy shit.

At last she straightened slowly, and audibly crunched Kerrie's candy. Then she giggled and put her hand over her mouth. "Oh my god, I actually had forgotten that LifeSavers taste pretty good!"

The tension broke everywhere. And suddenly we were surrounded by women brandishing singles and fives. We all looked at each other. Linda stepped up next, and a younger-looking pair of brunette women gave her a five, then kissed each other before leaning over simultaneously and sucking candies off the outer edges of Linda's breasts. The two women grinned at each other, showing the candies in between their lips, then they faded back to trade flavors...

Noor just couldn't do it, shaking her head nervously at a few offers. Poor thing, I was about to get worried, but the easy way her refusals were accepted set her visibly at ease. One woman who offered a five to her just smiled when Noor spastically shook her head, then she gave my friend's shoulder a squeeze. "You do you, girl. That's what we are all here for."

It wasn't a frenzy, but we did good business. We all seemed to react differently to the experience. Patty was so into it, I began to wonder a few things about my buddy. The crowd sensed it too, and most of the money was waved her way.

Well, I was popular too. I am hot, and I was the bride, after all.

You would think it would not make a difference, man or woman, right? A mouth is a mouth. At least, I tried to tell myself that the first time I took offered cash and trembled.

Oh, no they are not the same, I realized, as the black girl bent and suckled a green one from the edge of my cleavage. The other women who bought a suck further proved it. Women's mouths are different. Sometimes they were less assertive than men's, sometimes even more. But always different. And nice, in their own way.

It was fun. And scandalous. But with the possible exception of Patty, we all soon realized we wanted to move on, back to Where the Boys Are. "All right girls! Time's up," Linda told us, as if we had a set time limit per bar. "We must move on."

"Thank you all," I said in a slightly raised voice.

"Wait!" Noor shouted. She heaved a breath as we all looked at her in surprise. "Just one," she said firmly.

There were actual collisions here and there as women stepped forward. I had to laugh. Noor is good-looking, but... The appeal of forbidden fruit.

Noor's eyes widened and she stepped back against the bar, overwhelmed. Most of the women eased back, but money was still being clenched in hands.

"Hey, wait..." Jenn started to say protectively, but Noor interrupted her.

She turned to the bartender. "I just want one," she said in a small voice. "You choose," she entreated.

Marla snorted, grinned wickedly at the crowd, then pointed at the woman who had bought us the initial round of shots. "Dana," she said.

Dana's little asian companion poked her in the ribs, but Dana just stepped elegantly forward. She pressed a regulation two dollars into Noor's hands, smiled reassuringly, and gently bent forward. Then she clamped her lips down over a nipple and sucked and slurped like a madwoman.

Noor yelped in surprise, but hung in there. "Oh! I...! Um..." she squeaked, then suddenly slumped a tiny bit. "Oh shit," she almost growled in a voice two octaves lower.

Dana rose and smiled at her. "Thanks!"

"Thank you all!" I called again. We started moving toward the door.

"Hey!" Marla called out behind us. "Amy! Don't I even get a tip?"

I instantly flushed in embarrassment. I would never stiff someone. Ever. As I turned hurriedly back, I got confused. We had not actually bought any drinks for ourselves. And I had seen Linda drop a twenty and some ones for the bartender anyway.

Oh...

I met Marla's grinning blue eyes. Fuck it. If I was going to get my tits sucked in a lesbian bar, I might was well make a show of it...

"You were a great bartender, Marla," I said. I shot a quick look at my friends, who were showing that, 'Amy's about to do something outrageous, but what is it?' look. I turned, braced my knee on a barstool and hopped up onto the bar. I started to shove some glasses out of the way, and Marla eagerly cleared space around me. I twisted and lay on my back on the bar top, breasts pointing up, covered in candies. I tugged three off from the usually neglected flank and tucked them one at a time into the space between my tits. The were wolf-whistles through out the now even more quiet room.

"Now that is a fucking tip," Marla laughed, and buried her face down between my tits. The softness of her cheeks against my skin was a novelty. Even an utterly clean-shaven male still has a toughness... a roughness to their cheeks. Not here. Marla's face was so smooth. It felt sexy and fun and... nice. Her tongue rooted around for the candy and I shrugged, grabbing her head and pressing it downward. I rocked my shoulders, giving her a good motorboating for show.

She had a nice tongue. A very nice one.

Not as nice as my middle-aged dude's from earlier, but nice.

Not Todd's by any stretch of the imagination.

I felt Marla crunch the third candy, and she straightened up with a showy gasp. There were cheers. I was helped off the bar by Kerrie and Jenn, and we made our escape.

"Oh my God, I cannot believe that I did that!" Noor said in her lovely foreign accent with always impeccable diction.

"Oh yes you did," Patty said, with a speculative smile on her face. I was definitely going to corner my buddy sometime soon. Before the wedding. And I would ask some questions. Patty had definitely had the most fun in there, and she betrayed no signs of some kind of new awakening...

"What made you do it, Noor?" Kerrie asked, probably still wondering what, beyond alcohol, had made any of us do it.

"I do not know," she replied slowly. "I think I just realized that this would be my one chance to do such a thing, and suddenly decided to take it."

"You could have done more, you know," Patty pressed. "That woman, even with her little girl-toy hottie right there, would have done you in an instant if you'd been down."

"Oh, I don't think so," Noor deflected, skin darkening once more on her face. "And besides, half the women in that bar only wanted Amy," she said, in an alarming effort at deflection.

Everybody laughed at me, except Patty. "Oh, Noor," she said, rubbing her shoulder consolingly, "I hate to tell you this, but the only one of us that every woman in that bar wanted to fuck was you, you little tease."

Noor's eyes went wide. Then she straightened and lifted her chin regally. "Well that is too bad for them then! I am far too busy with cocks to open up a second front in my life, thank you!"

If possible, we all shrieked louder at that than at any other shocker that had happened. It is not that Noor is not as horny as any of us, she certainly is. But she is super concerned about open propriety. That was raunchiest thing she had ever said to us, and I once had dragged a blow by blow description out of her about the minor Bollywood star she had nailed two years ago. A charmingly euphemistic blow by blow, but a blow by blow nonetheless. There had been lots of blows in that meeting...