by talltails
On the plus side, enjoyable story, pretty good sex descriptions.
However, an editor, or more careful proofreading, might have prevented the Jenny, Jessy and Jessica flip-flops.
So, what is her name Jenny, Jessy, or Jessica? Good romance story even with those errors.
Nicely done. Simple, straightforward romance with a little drama thrown in. What more could we ask for?
Thank you for sharing
This is an erotic story that a 7th grader would be proud of. From moving in to passionate love in a few weeks. This young woman is a bank vice president. Really? As others have mentioned the 7th grader writing this didn't even have the courtesy to proof read it so that he could discover the obvious on-again, off-again issue with the name of the woman MC. I'm not sure why I stuck with it for most of the story (except for the juvenile obligatory sex scenes which I skipped altogether). 2* for a clear waste of time.
Yeah, some editing issues, and entirely predictable, but still….
A pleasant little tale in which nice people come to a good end. Sometimes, that’s all you need. Keep writing.
Very nice romance. 5/5 You do need a proofreader though. Also, who were the two men in the first burglary? Is there a chapter 2?
Good story. Well done! Agree with the other reviews re Jessy/Jenny/Jessica.
Guns save lives. I almost quit when she said, "No Guns." I am former law enforcement.
Otherwise, this is a good story with good character development.
Ed
Damn you write good stories and other Authors could learn from you! One great thing is you write like you got good scores in English Literature by listening to your teacher. I taught College level English Lit. but after four years it seemed as though the class was there to just get a passing score. Quite that and my Editing job and moved to Fairbanks Alaska and took on a Field Editor position with a well known Hunting Publication. Loved that job! Thank you for not using the dot dot dot pause. I tried to teach my students that the word were to express when the Author wanted the reader to pause. Thank you for being a great Author, your works are appreciated! Another 5 BIG ASS FUCKING HUGE FLAMING NOVA STARS!
Jenny? Jessy? Whoever she is, I hope everyone figures it out before the wedding.
Sort of left us “hanging” at the end. Needs a real conclusion - Chapter 2?
Nice one, nice plot, good character set, descriptions were good, my only complaint is that her name changed throughout, and I feel you rushed the ending.
OK. Is her name Jenny? or Jessy?
Maybe she schizophrenic, you know, dual personality?
A little proofreading goes a long way, you know.
OK, I guess the answer to 'what's her name' is Jessy, since he called her Jessica towards the end.
Not Jennifer.