All Comments on 'Murder in the First'

Fun read. Not the normal type of story, but still very good.

Fun and interesting story, Thanks!

Thank you

Excellent written story, Some how I never caught on till the actual testimony of the Defandent. Seems like once again Justice Finally Prevals.

Very well done.

Why Romance? Great Loving Wives to the second power story. U am sure our sharks would find great defects instead of enjoying it, as I did. I admit to being very curious about why Miles had a lot of influence with the Police. It did seem strange that they said that the Lover had an alibi and did not furnish the Defense the specifics. Great Fun. Thanks.

<p>I know what you were trying to do, but your execution was poor. This story was way too cutesy-cutesy. Your opening paragraphs were very confusing.</P>

<p>By the end, the story had lost any credibility. Did you really expect the readers to believe that the defense attorney was the wife of the defendant's adulterous wife's lover? And that that attorney would actively try to seduce this man and then fall in love with him?</P>

<p>I know that these stories are fantasy, and that we have to suspend certain belief systems to enjoy them, but really! This was way over the top...and poorly constructed too.</P>

Enjoyable murder mystery. Thank you.

Nice story, although a bit convoluted as others have noted. The main problem here is that murder mysteries follow a 'formula' in which all suspects are introduced early on. We the readers then wonder which of them did it. Had you brought Miles into the story near the beginning, it would have worked better.

....you seem to like the fantasy part best but worthwhile read.

I thoroughly enjoyed your little tale of mystery and intrigue.

its not always who gets charged. TK U MLJ LV NV

If I recall correctly this is not the only story you have written where the police are represented as being somewhat less than ethical and/or competent. Regardless, well done 5*

...the investigating detective offers the alleged murder weapon to the accused suspect, Peter J. Challiner to inspect and confirm ownership?

If he had been the actual killer, wouldn't he have been overjoyed to accept the pistol then use it to shoot the police officers? And if not attempt to make his escape, then try for 'Death By Cop'?

Would not proper identification of a firearm be by engraved registration numbers?

To eyeball to identify, when there has to be millions of Glock pistols manufactured?

Finding a weapon, even a used weapon at a homicide scene, is not evidence that it actually had been used to commit the crime.

That would be done in a police lab under stringent, verifiable record-keeping. And handing a weapon that may have been used in a crime, to the suspect, does that not break chain-of-evidence and create an almost certain nasty tantrum by an Appeals Court?

For that matter, why was he brought to the scene of the crime anyway? Before proper, i.e. regulation processing of the crime scene had been completed?

Is it not correct procedure that a dead person be identified at the morgue? To double-check the identity of the deceased before asking confirmation by the next of kin? Cause we all know the meaning of 'assumption', do we not?

I understand that the author of this story intended a romantic ending. However, based on evidence, motive and opportunity, I would accuse Judith P. Slattery, QC, of the murder and a double-frame up.

She murders Dorothy Challiner, then somehow inveigles her husband, Miles Slattery and his crony's into panicking and clumsily try to frame Peter for Dorothy's murder.

Thereby diverting attention from Mrs. Slattery as a possible suspect.

"Because my friend and I have been having an affair for some time and if her husband, when her husband finds out about it he will divorce her and, under the terms of their pre-nuptuial agreement she will stand to lose a considerable amount of money."

And, "...we only have to worry about my husband, but I think not for much longer."

I consider these phrasings to be 'Chekpv's Gun'!

The cops want a suspect to be nowhere near any weapons, no matter if it is unloaded or even disassembled.

They are prey to the almost superstitious dread of weapons that has been culturally promoted.

but a good defense attorney trumps them all, TK U MLJ LV NV

PROVING THE COP WAS LYING WAS THE BEST BIT AND BLAMING HER EX HUSBAND FOR KILLING HER....CHEATS NEVER PROSPER AND THAT CROOKED COP SANK FASTER THAN THE TITANIC....

The storyline was weak and not credible. Not one of your best.

Love the story. AAAAA++++

Very good - short story. Kept me interested in finding out that justice was done