All Comments on 'My Angel'

So she died alone with the bum of a husband lying in their house boozed up?

Unless she died at the scene and all the bandaging and bruises were a figment of his imagination? Not clear. Also should this not have been in romance?

Very sad romantic story

5stars

This wasn't a story. It was a story fragment. Just a warm up. Not worth much of a rating or much of my time. 2*

Not clear what happened!

4

Wrong category.

Wow! Wish I had my own Shari.

So sad, my wife and are accused of being joined at the hip after 30 yrs.

Did Shari die? Please explain, I am finding this very unclear

I liked it.. stories don’t have to be full of sex to be a good read!!

Lovely story of love beyond life. You needed to be clearer that she passed. I reread it and realized you meant plastic not plaster. Motionless in the bodybag in the morgue. Was that correct?

Agree with others - wasn't 100% sure she was alive or dead, even at the end. I would suggest if you had not described her as an "angel" upfront, a subtle transition to that word later would have worked better? 4*

good story, I got a bit confused but figured it out.

Very sad

Sad and sappy. Nice for a brit sunny Sunday morn.

A very touching and loving story. Well worthy of 5 stars!

Okay. Very well written. Creative concept. Had me confused for a second, before I reached the end and understood what you were going for.

However... I know the category being called "LOVING Wifes" may sound like this belongs here, but it really doesn't. Read the category's description, please.

Perhaps better suited for Romance than LW. Thanks for sharing.

I dont came here to cry. 5 stars

Less love story more horror. Like, two people died when she did, and the second wasn't the baby.

Damn it must be pollen in the air. 5.

At first I didn't understand the ending.

So I read again. Ah, now I get it.

Pulled my heart-strings a little bit.

this was done very well.

A sad love story though.

Nice work, Chymora.

You made this poignant plot flow well.

A sign that you are a good writer.

Very sad. Well written.

Well, of course she was the perfect woman- she was mute!

More of a Romance than LW.

Just looked at the end again, I think she died.

Emotion without logic is confusing and pointless. You gave us an emotional outcry and display of grief and loss, and it made no sense because you didn't pay attention to the details, and you didn't Think to communicate from the reader's perspective. So all the emotional power and energy are dissipated in the confusion and searching for the mistaken spellings or misused words, trying to decode what the author Feels about the work, rather than what the reader Thinks about the work. I appreciate the effort but also have to acknowledge the short comings. Good luck with future work.

Nice story. I was just as confused as the other readers, right until the end. I had mentally headed off into various reasons trying to explain why he hadn't visited her and why exactly he had crawled into a bottle. Then, it all clicked although she wouldn't have been all stiff and with bruising if... well, you know! Cheers.

Sad story well written.

A sad story, but a good one.

Maybe this was submitted to LW because the readers are so critical. However there’s nothing to seriously criticize other than that it should have been submitted to Romance.

Very touching.

LOVE slap-hapy-papy #9

I think there is the bones of a decent story in there, but it's buried under some pretty rough writing and you put it in the wrong category.

Pointless and …zzzz

That was a wonderful loving wife story. Very moving, a vignette worth every one of the 5*s.

In case anybody missed it (quite a few of y’all judging by the comments), Shari died.

Confusing and abrupt ending

Lonesome, you do get that she is dead, but to him not gone, right?

JPB

BTW, a solid four stars from me.

JPB

Not going to lie, had I not read some comments first I would have missed it too since I sorta speed read through these. So I slowed down to process things. Yeah this is a pretty good one. Actually sad that he can't move on.

She is his angel, and he is blow nuts crazy.

she wasn't injured....SHE DIED! Damn some of you are fucking dumb. She's his "ANGEL".

Yes, it is obvious she died. Decent story. But mislabeled. Should be Romance, not Loving Wives.

Tragic.

It's life alas some of us never move on, the silence being the most deafening of all loss of senses even when you can still hear others, losing a child is cruel losing the physical touch and presence of your partner is a killer, losing both, well besides a bottle there is always a gun, bridge or something to join you with where you heart wants to go. The story lacked depth to me, yes she died, yes he lost his child, and yes he didn't move on, but to me the depth still wasn't there

Too many people quite thinking when they start reading. Try it sometime, you may find a new world to enjoy.

5-star story

But yes, this is Romance, not LW.

Oh so,sad, and so well done. Thanks for writing!

oof...

5* Sweet, I "got it" on my second reading. Thank you for posting it.

oh jesus.... why? ;-;

One of my favorite stories ever. This is genius and gorgeous and heartbreaking.

Probably my favourite of your stories.

This is one of those stories that develops slowly until it suddenly becomes clear and you realize you have a tear in your eye and heart. Only the second of your stories that I've read but the submission list has been printed and the rest will be read,

I actually don't care if it was in the wrong category. It was a brilliant and truly emotional story. I understand what people are saying, it was not suitable for speed reader's they miss so much in stories. The second reading clarified what the story was about. Thank you author for a great short story, probably your best.

I became concerned that Shari would die. Glad to see she didn't. Four stars for a touching story.

JPB

WOW! 5 BIG ASS FUCKING HUGE FLAMING NOVA STARS!

good story and writing. It was nearly the last line(s) before I realized Shari didn't survive the accident.