My BDSM journey with Mark Pt. 02

"This was the night that our friendship became erotic. We also continued our regular chats, but they often would become sexual. In the year that followed, I had around eight sessions of my own with him. But this was the beginning..."

As a reader might recall from my first chapter, I had met Mark, an older Dom, who introduced me to the concept of BDSM, or D/s, if you will. After spending time chatting about it, he invited me to watch a scene over Skype and it was soul-changing for me and led to my first personal experience.

It was a couple of months later. Although the scene script would be largely the same as what I had witnessed, during the process I would be exposed to the preparations and activities that occurred off camera. My chats with Mark continued and our relationship continued to gain clarity and intimacy, as I pursued more questions. Finally, a date was selected.

A week before, Mark had sent me a long, detailed email with our scenario. It would unfold exactly as he had written it, so I pretty much knew about everything that would occur before the day arrived.

He asked me if I wanted the experience exactly as he described in his email, yes or no? I was to suspend having any orgasms during the week before our session. He would pick me up, and we would have a drink in the pub. He told me he would ask something of me.

When the evening arrived, he picked me up at the train and we went to the pub. After one or two drinks he asked me "if I had brought" something for him. I knew from his email what he meant. I knew I was to go to the toilet. There I had one last choice, stay, or go. If I wanted to go ahead with everything he described in the email, I was to remove my panties and give them to him. If I wasn't sure, I could leave the pub and go home. We'd be equally good friends no, hard feelings.

I remember so well how my body was literally shaking as we were in the pub that evening. By this point I knew him so well and trusted him completely -- but this day it felt so different. It would be passing a threshold from which I would never be able to truly return.

Of course, I brought him my panties. As I did, I noticed they were wet.

We walked to his house. It was only a few streets away. On the way he walked slightly behind me and slapped my bum a few times. Outside the door of his house, he grabbed my hair and pulled my head back. He gave me a kiss on the mouth and guided me inside.

2 / 6

In accordance with the script he had sent me, I knew what was expected. He had said that he would leave a glass and bottle in the kitchen, and that I would get it and serve him a drink.

He sat on his sofa and as agreed, I went to his kitchen to get his drink.

There I found the bottle and glass as expected. Next to them was a note and a present. The note told me to unpack my present and wear it, and only it.

It was a fishnet, see through long top/dress, more lingerie than dress, really.

I was so nervous. I undressed there in his kitchen, opened the package and put this top on. It barely covered my bum. With his drink I walked back to him. This would be the first time that I would be essentially naked in front of him. I was wet and so very aroused.

He sat there waiting and I had to stand in front of him. I gave him the drink and stood there. He told me to turn around very slowly, and he looked me up and down -- inspecting me -- taking in my body.

In that moment I was only focusing on myself and what was happening. Later I imagined what the other women had been through.

He stood up and told me to hold my hands high up above my head. He walked around me slowly. Now touched me, soft and gently. My belly, back, bum, breasts, neck, face. I was trembling and shaking under his gaze, at his touch. I felt so exposed. Not only my body, but my soul. As though there was nothing I could hide. He touched every part of me, and left me nothing of my own.

As he walked around me, he whispered to me, telling me how beautiful I was, how available, obedient, sexy.

He went to a desk and came back with black leather wrist and ankle straps and put them on me. To put on the ankle straps he had me raise one leg at a time and place my foot on his knee, making me feel even more exposed.

He finished his drink and took me upstairs.

The room I had seen on Skype was on the top floor of his house. Almost the entire top floor was one open space. Except at the top of the stairs, he had a small bathroom.

We walked into the main room, and he stood me in the center. Like the woman I had seen, he tied my wrists to a rope and pulled me up until I could barely stand on my toes. Almost hanging.

The room was dark with only one light above me and some low red lights in a corner.

3 / 6

He took some scissors and approached me, told me to stand very still. He started cutting my new top, until it all fell away. Little as it was, I once again was feeling even more exposed than before!

He left the room, left me hanging alone.

When he came back, he had changed, wearing the same costume as he did in the scene I had watched -- a black mask and a black leather vest. I remember seeing him come in and seeing his penis hanging soft, and thinking: I am soooo horny, how can he be flaccid?!?!

And as I had seen on Skype, I could see how he was leaking a lot even though he was flaccid. I'm not sure why I was so attentive to that, maybe because I had just not seen it before.

He started touching and feeling me everywhere again. His hands on my skin, gently stroking my breasts and then pinching a nipple hard!. Gently stroking my bum and then a hard slap!

Soft, hard, soft, hard.

Next, he took the multi-tail flogger and walked around me, softly flogging my bum, thighs, back and breasts. The strokes were sometimes sharper, sometimes softer. But never so painful as to cause any alarm. It was my first experience with this sensation. I loved it! It made me feel so helpless and vulnerable. I still don't understand how each step made me even more aroused when each time I felt there was no place left to go!

Up to this point, he had refrained from touching my pussy. Now he lifted a leg, made me balance on one toe and stroked me briefly. He told me how soaking wet I was.

He untied me and took me to the cross I had seen, tying my wrists and ankles, leaving my arms and legs spread and then adjusting it until I was lying nearly flat.

He then put small clamps on my nipples. Ouch!! It was another first experience for me. He had to adjust them a few times, but I managed.

After that the toys came out. He placed the stool between my legs, and a trolley next to it with some toys: the wand, some small vibrators for the clitoris, a small massager with a pinwheel of metal teeth, and the flogger.

These were details I couldn't fully see on Skype, so I appreciated being seeing them before blindfold went on, as it now did.

It was all dark, now, but so aware of my nakedness and my open position!

4 / 6

He sat on the stool between my legs and reminded me not to orgasm until he gave me permission.

He started stroking with his hands, flogging carefully. Teased me with the small vibrator a bit, brought me close to an orgasm several times and then stopped. But I was so close all the time that he didn't tease too much.

During this first session, there was no penetration, only clit stimulation. In later sessions, Mark did penetrate me. With toys and his penis.

When I got too close to an orgasm, he returned to flogging, using the metal-pin roller-massager, and tapping or pulling on the nipple clamps to distract me and calm me down.

Towards the end when I had been so close several times, he stood up to reach the nipple clamps and I noticed how hard he now was. No longer flaccid! He clearly enjoyed seeing me so close to orgasm.

My emotions were high. I remember feeling so many different things. Enormous arousal, but scared of what was happening, perhaps even a bit embarrassed in a strange way. So exposed! Not just the nakedness of my body, but of my emotions, of my pleasure and pain. It was all out there for Mark to see, and it made me feel so vulnerable.

I was also self-conscious and worried that I wouldn't be good enough. That he wouldn't like my body, or that I would cum too soon, unable to hold it in for him...

But I remember really trusting him, feeling safe to do this with him.

Finally, he stood next to me and came close to my face when he pulled the clamps, his mouth close to mine when I moaned. He asked in a whisper if I was a good slut and if I deserved to orgasm? He made me beg for it. I did! And hearing myself beg ratcheted up my arousal yet another step I didn't know I had! I wanted to beg for it, but I needed his permission to allow myself to open up like that. This is what Mark was doing for me, removing my own barriers, and allowing me to let out what was already in me!

He moved between my legs again, and I heard him turn on the wand massager. I could feel my orgasm like an object pressing to get out of my body. I don't think he needed to touch me again to get me to cum, only to tell me to!

But he did touch me, pressing the wand to my clit and I came! He held it there against me and I came! I came so hard! Over and over! One orgasm wasn't done when I felt the next begin!

I can't tell you how many or how long, but it felt forever. One long continuous orgasm!

5 / 6

I pulled on my restraints! I couldn't move and he kept going! I felt so helpless...but unbelievably amazing as well!

The pain in my nipples was forgotten... until he pulled them off during my orgasm! The pain was intense then, but it added to the pleasure that was flowing through me!

I moaned, cried almost, and screamed for him to stop! But he kept making me cum, until it finally became too much. I remember the relief when he finally pulled the vibrations away from me.

I was exhausted and was hanging there totally weak, trying to catch my breath. I was shaking and felt like crying out of joy and relief. I cried of pure emotions, good emotions, and feelings.

Mark comforted me as he untied my wrists and ankles. He told me how wet I was and made me taste myself from his fingers. He helped my off the cross and hugged me. Held me.

I realized what was expected from me and I thanked him, meaning it deeply. I thanked him for the experience, for the attention, for the orgasms... for everything.

And though sucking him afterwards was in the script and expected, I found it was something that I now wanted to do more than anything! I've always enjoyed doing this but now I wanted it more than ever.

I knelt in front of him and took him into my mouth, sucking him gently. He then held my head and fucked my mouth gently but deep. I loved how he held my head in his hands. His warmth, his smell, his pre cum in the beginning. It was so intense and intimate. He didn't need long. He started moaning and I knew he was close. It felt so amazing that I made him cum like that. Proud. And he came! Not sure if he had also saved up, but wow! It was a wonderful feeling. He kept fucking my mouth very slowly while he came, until he was completely done and then gently pulled out. We made eye contact as I swallowed his sperm.

He gently helped me back up and held me in his arms. He kissed me on my head and then on the lips. Then he hugged me tight and laid my head on his shoulder. I remember our sticky sweaty skin molding together. I felt a heartbeat but couldn't say if it was mine or his. It was a very intimate moment.

He whispered sweet things to me. That I did well, that he was proud of me. And I did feel proud! Surprised that I did it but so happy that I had!

Mark walked me out of the room and guided me in the small bathroom at the top of the stairs. I had a quick shower and saw that Mark had brought all my clothes from the kitchen earlier when he got changed, including the panties I had given him in the pub.

6 / 6

He had told me to meet him in the kitchen after my shower. When I came downstairs, he had also gotten dressed. When he saw me, he came up to me and we hugged again. He took my head and looked deep in my eyes and asked how I felt. I told him I felt amazing, and we sat in his kitchen and shared some wine. He was now back to "normal Mark".

We talked about the experience while we drank. He wanted to know how I experienced every part of the day. How I felt in each moment. Talking about it with him so openly was a very special and emotional feeling. Letting him know the experience from my perspective.

It was a sharing, almost a purging, or a cleansing. Allowing me to express it and not keep it bottled up. It was a very deep and honest chat but also loose and casual. It also allowed me to fix the feelings and events in my mind, perhaps that's why I still remember so many of the details today. But we also laughed and I remember casually telling him that I loved how he tasted.

He asked me if I wanted this to become a regular experience, or if one time was enough for me. I told him I had enjoyed it massively and that I would like to try it again. He knew I wanted more. My sub role wouldn't be just in his playroom anymore, he soon started demanding things more often when we weren't together. I felt he had somehow taken possession of a part of me.

Not long after that I left for home.

I went for drinks with a friend that evening but remember just thinking about what happened that day. I felt very relaxed but also super excited still. It was really a proud feeling...super proud of what I had done and just felt amazing. I was tempted to tell my friend about it, but I didn't.

When I finally got home, I was still extremely horny and masturbated while thinking about it. Re-living it in my head. My nipples were still a bit sore.

While I was out with my friend Mark had texted me. Thanked me again and told me how amazing I was...but also told me to send him a selfie if I "re-lived" my first session that night. So, I did. It didn't feel weird or wrong to show him my pussy and how wet I was.

I often still think of things he or we did in those sessions while I'm masturbating. Especially this first one and how intense it was with all my nerves on edge...and the last one...