Naked Goddess on Stage Pt. 02

A couple of days after the performance I attended, the school's weekly paper featured an interview with the unnamed woman playing "The Naked Goddess of Peace and Reconciliation". No photos, no name, and very limited references to her background. Just a lot of questions and answers about her performance and how she felt about it. At the time of the interview, she had completed three of the four scheduled performances. I'll try to summarize what I read:

She was in her late twenties, married with a small child, was a grad student in a nearby university, which she didn't name. She'd never acted before, but wanted to try acting just for once.

College Paper: How did you get this role?

Her Answer: I saw a casting call for a non-speaking part in a comedy, to play a Goddess on a throne. I figured, all I'd have to do is be there, no real acting. Plus, it might be fun being a Goddess. No pay, all volunteers. When I went for the tryouts, nobody else was trying for the role, because any serious actor would want lines and motion, to show off their skills to make a name and start a career. Since I'd never been an actor before, and was studying for a different career, and it was just four performances, I figured I could fit this in and have some fun. I got the part. But even though there wasn't much for me to learn, I'd be a stage prop for the other actors which meant I'd have to be at every rehearsal. They didn't tell me I'd be the focus of the whole play, and no mention that I'd be taking my clothes off!

College Paper: How did you agree to get naked?

Her Answer: Ha! They kind of eased me into it. The original cast call said nothing about nudity, and at the first rehearsal, they gave me a "nude" body suit, a flesh-colored Danskin with appliqués for the nipples and pubic hair, and a long blonde wig, long enough to reach my waist. Right away, the director noticed that everyone kept dropping their lines trying to describe what they couldn't see, trying to describe the details of my actual nipples and pussy without being able to see them. After a few more bummed tries, the director asked me if I could let them have a quick peek at the parts in question, then cover back up. Right away I was against it, but she, the director, said it would be like changing backstage, which all the actors have to do anyway. They'd all seen each other naked, if only briefly, I told them I'd have to think about it, I'd never been seen naked before. I was still afraid. So we continued that rehearsal with me still in the body suit.

...It was two days until the next rehearsal, and I used that time getting used to being naked. When I was alone in my apartment, I stripped off while studying for my grad course, but got dressed before my husband got home or if I had to go pick up our child. At the next rehearsal, I told the director I might be ready to flash! After a short while I felt brave enough, so they asked me to strip off. I did, but just for a minute, then quickly got back into the body suit. I felt embarrassed. We went through the rest of that day's rehearsal with me in the body suit. But right away everyone noticed how smoothly the lines went after that one little peek, once they'd seen what they needed to talk about, namely my lady bits. The director thought about the improvement and asked If I'd mind losing the body suit entirely, and playing the part in the nude? No! A quick peek was embarrassing enough, but to stay naked the whole time? I don't think so.

...She gave me some encouragement about playing a nude role. That when I'm on stage it's not me, but my character the goddess. The other actors who had done nude before told me they pretend they're wearing a mask so nobody in the audience knows whose body they're seeing. They gave me a real mask to wear while I still had the body suit on and asked me to just wear it for a while, and sure enough, I didn't feel like me any more. Next they asked me to strip off, but to keep the mask on. But I couldn't do that. I told them I'd have to think about it, I'd never been seen naked before. So we continued that rehearsal with me still in the body suit.

...At the next rehearsal, they gave me the mask again and said I should strip off only if I wanted to. No pressure? Ha! On with the mask, off with the body suit! I felt fine, since it was the goddess and not me. But no matter who the character was, it was my body standing there, the only person naked. Then they gave me the blonde wig. But the wig didn't fit properly with my mask still on, so I asked everyone to stand still for a moment while I removed the mask to make sure I wouldn't freak out being nude in front of them without it, because now it would be me and not the Goddess. And remember, I'm naked and they all have their clothes on. Actors, extras, stage crew, lighting people, food caterers, delivery men, everybody, janitors, even students wandering around. I felt like I wasn't really there, like an out-of-body experience.

...I was already naked, all I had to do was take the mask off. I was afraid the Nude Goddess would revert back to the Nude Me. I finally took the mask off, and for a moment I was Me again and almost started to run behind a curtain. But then they put that wig on me and I was the Goddess again. That's when I realized I could do this naked, and told them. The entire cast and crew rewarded me with a big cheer. So I stayed that way for all the rehearsals, and, as you know, for the public performances. Nude, wearing only the wig. So this is how they get you to play a role nude!

...Nude was really better, because I felt foolish in that skin suit with fake nipples and a fake bush sewn on. Nothing in my life is fake, and I didn't want to start now. If Aristophane's original script called for real nipples and a real bush, that's what I'd give them. By now I was fully into the production. I was part of the team.

...Since I was worried about being identified on stage, the makeup crew said they could make me look like a different person by treating my eyebrows and the corners of my mouth.

...So, I was the only one naked even during the rehearsals! At the dress rehearsals, we all got out of our street clothes, but I was the only one who stayed naked. The men got into their togas and strapped on those huge phalluses, and the women put on those loose, almost transparent, gowns. No underwear, I could see hints of their nipples and mounds, most with pubic hair but some not. But they weren't naked like me. I was the Goddess, the Naked Goddess!

...Speaking of pubic hair, there was a big debate over whether I should be smooth. I had a very full bush at the time. Shaving would make my lips more visible, but without hair how could they talk about a forest? So there, with the Goddess naked and sitting on a chair with her knees up, in front of a mirror so I could see too, the actors who had lines argued over how the area between 'her' legs should be presented. It was like they were all looking at the Goddess's body and, with the mirror, I was just another observer!

...You may wonder why this was such a big deal. Well, if you've seen or read the play then you know the Goddess's genitals are very important to the story, both visually and in the dialog. Once I agreed to do the part nude, the director wanted to make sure what was seen matched what was spoken. I learned that in the theater business this is called 'continuity', and without it the audience gets confused. After a long debate, she finally made the decision that the Goddess's lips would be bare. The only hair left would be a neatly trimmed triangle above the slit and going out to the sides, just to the crease of the legs. The remaining hair would be fluffed out for fullness. The director said we were lucky that I showed up with a full bush, because that gave her plenty to start with.

...I felt like I was in the doctor's office, and that they were describing somebody else's body, but of course they were looking between MY legs and talking about MY slit and MY hair and MY lips! Finally, the director wrote out some instructions to the salon where she gets groomed, and I went there the next day.

College Paper: What was the most difficult thing you had to do while rehearsing?

Her Answer: Well, after getting naked, nothing else really mattered. Everyone else wore either street clothes or their costumes, but all I had was a robe. But it came off whenever somebody had lines referring to the Goddess. It really took a lot of attitude adjustment before I could do that comfortably, and sometimes I still freak out at rehearsals. But the acting itself was easy, because I didn't have any lines to memorize, didn't have any moves except to swing down on the rope and then climb up on the throne.

College Paper: And what is the most difficult thing for you when you're on the public stage?

Her Answer: Besides holding off an orgasm, which is really difficult, just being naked in front of so many people. Besides strangers, there are people that I take classes with, my friends are there, even my sister and one of my brothers. I told them I was going to be in this play, but I didn't say what part I have, so they'll just figure I'm one of the warrior's wives and somebody else is the Goddess. The play's makeup staff was great, and the wig helps a lot. My own husband had trouble recognizing me, even though he knew what to watch for.

College Paper: Your husband? How does he feel about your playing this role the way you did?

Her Answer: By about the second or third dress rehearsal, he noticed I wasn't bringing the body suit home for cleaning. So I told him I'm doing the part nude, rehearsals and all. I didn't tell him how explicit it would be, just that I'd be in only one act and that he'd enjoy seeing the other women in their filmy gowns. That's all he knew before he attended the first performance. When my part came around, of course he saw the Naked Goddess swing down, and he knew that was my role, but he still had trouble realizing it was me. Of course, he figured it out. But he was still shocked to see that I was fully naked, the only one really, really naked, and of course he wasn't expecting to share with 400 other people the views that usually only he gets, and maybe my doctor. Hey, funny thing: I just realized my doctor was there last weekend, I wonder if he recognized me, maybe from my puss!

...Anyway, back to my husband. He said he didn't mind me being naked. I reminded him that it wouldn't matter if he minded or not, because the whole point of the play is that women have power to make their own decisions and to act in their own right, but anyway I was happy he liked it. He said he squirmed more over the dialog than about my being nude, but then he started feeling rather proud that I would do this. And he knows me a lot better now!

...He's been to all the performances so far, and will be there tomorrow night for the final show. It sold out long ago, but I was able to get him in anyway.

College Paper: You have one more performance to go. What goes through your head when you're on stage, naked, when you're not used to being naked and you're not even an actor?

Her Answer: Lots of things. I guess if I had lines and moves, I wouldn't have time to think about stuff, but just sitting there my mind is going all over the place. First, I'm terrified about being naked. Before doing the rehearsals nude, I wasn't used to being seen. After I got to know most of the 50 or so people who were seeing me naked every day I got sort of used to it. But 400 people you don't know at all is really terrifying. I'm still not comfortable with being seen naked, but it's OK as soon as I remind myself that I'm not me, I'm the Goddess. It's the Goddess who is naked, not me. But suddenly I realize she's using my body, it's my body on display, but as long as I'm the Goddess you don't know who I am. But still, my mind is exploding in a million different directions.

...Also, onstage I'm very aroused, and I'm thinking about not climaxing. When the script talks about flows and wetness, it's real. Hey, let me see you try sitting up there spread out with a spotlight on your puss, having a bunch of actors describing what your clit looks like and announcing to a huge audience that your vagina is flowing like a river. It's like biofeedback, and it just builds up, more flow. During the rehearsals it was OK to let go, but not on stage.

College Paper: And then what about after your performance, what do you think of when you're at home, and back in your real life?

Her Answer: I'm so glad you asked that! You can learn more about me by knowing I'm willing to let you to see me naked, than you can by actually seeing me naked. I hope that people saw more than just my naked body, and that they leave the theater trying to get inside my head. And the way to get inside my head so they can know me better is to just realize that I'm giving them the gift of my nudity, and let their thoughts start from there. That's when I'd want to interview THEM, to see what THEY'RE thinking!

...If I knew for sure that the audience could do that, I'd gladly do this role without makeup, so they'd know it was really me. I'd be proud of that. And we'd be using my real name right now. But I don't think many people can get past just looking, and they don't bother trying to imagine what's in my head. That would intimidate them. Anyway, that's why I appreciate your question.

College Paper: Is it sexy?

Her Answer: Yes! And I'm very aroused. Just being naked, during rehearsals even if I'm just hanging around in a robe listening to my iPod, I know I'll be taking it off in a few minutes. Just with the anticipation, I'm right on the edge.

...And I already told you about being aroused during the performances, but let me add this little story: The first time I rode that rope swing down, it was sliding right over my clit so I was aroused before I even got to the stage! You've heard of a Cliff Hanger, well this was a Clit Hanger.

...I'm getting pretty good at holding off. When you see me on stage I'm on edge the whole time. You can tell from my nipples, they're like flashing blinkers announcing that I'm about to come. If the script didn't call for me to be still and silent, I might just let it happen on stage and die of humiliation instead of waiting for the curtain to come down. Maybe tomorrow night I'll just go with the flow and see what happens. The other actors are skilled enough to ad lib something if they see me climaxing, and just work it into the action somehow. They've already seen me do it during rehearsals, so I think they'd know what to do onstage. Might add some realism, we'll see. Then the audience would REALLY get to know me!

...But, yes, it's sexy. Very sexy.

College Paper: Does displaying yourself so explicitly make you feel humiliated?

Actress: You mean my pussy?

College Paper: Yes.

...It might be humiliating if I just sat there demurely with my knees clamped together, because then I'd look and feel like a victim. But once I read the script, I chose to spread my legs wide open and show pink. I feel humiliated just being naked at all, but making it explicit adds power, not more humiliation. I'm already humiliated, now I can be powerful! But also, it's confusing, you can tell by how mixed up my answers are while I'm telling you about it.

...And being naked while I'm in character isn't so humiliating, since that's the only way to represent a Goddess. Why would a Goddess wear clothes? Like, where would she even shop for them? Goddesses are powerful and don't need clothes. But, having all those eyes on me can be humiliating and I'm still not used to it. And you and I both know exactly where all those eyes are focused.

...But as long as I remind myself that the play is about women's power, and that I'm the most powerful person in the whole theater, the humiliation goes away.

College Paper: This was quite a step, going from never having done a nude part to being the only nude actor in the whole play. Would you do this again?

Her Answer: Hey, not only had I never done nude, I had never acted before at all! Yes I'd do it again, but only if I can keep it separate from my real life. I have my real life as a mom and wife and grad student, but when I'm onstage I'm in the fantasy world of the Goddess. As long as the makeup people can fix me up I can keep it a secret! My friends and professional associates and my sister brother are all in the audience, and I've been with some of them since they saw the play and not a one of them recognized me. Nobody knows which character I am. I can't stay naked for the curtain call so I put on a wispy gown just like the other women.

...But for the photos and backstage parties I ditch the wig and take off the fake eyebrows and mouth accents, so I'm just like the other women except now you can recognize me. So my brother and sister and everyone else strain their eyes to catch a glimpse of my tits through the gown, not realizing that I was showing them those same tits just a few minutes earlier! Not to mention my puss!

...I really do have to put on an act when somebody wants to talk about 'that brazen lady who sat there naked in front of so many people--how could she do that?' And sometimes they ask, 'Could you ever do anything like that?'

...Well, uh, maybe. Like, tomorrow night?