Neighborhood Secrets Pt. 01

Honestly most of what had happened right after that was blurry to me. The shock of seeing her standing there, the look of complete horror on her face, me scampering up the stairs to get out of her dress, I guess in a fight or flight response. To this day I remember them vaguely.

The friend of my wife who had driven them to New York City had received a phone call around six in the morning saying that her mother was being rushed to hospital and she needed to get home. They had all packed up and left as quickly as they could. Steph had driven her, and their other friends, home because her friend was so upset.

When I got to our bedroom I tried to quickly remove the wedding dress. My quick movement caused the seems to rip on both arms. I was in the process of stepping out of the dress when she walked into the room. That probably made it worse since she now found me in bridal lingerie and heels.

"And your lingerie that day, my God you even knew to put the panties on over the garter straps. Plus, the heels, it was so obvious that you had spent a lot of time in heels, you moved around with no problems, they didn't slow you down a bit." There was anger in her eyes as she recounted what happened after she caught me.

"Steph... I am sorry. I will be sorry everyday the rest of my life." I said looking down at the table.

"I know... the thing is I do believe that. Although I also think you are partly sorry that you got caught. I have always wondered... would you have told me all of it, if I hadn't seen what was in the bag laying on the bed or would you have hide that and I would have eventually had to discover that also?" Another drink of wine was downed.

The humiliation I had felt at being caught in lingerie when she walked in the room was almost immediately added to when she had picked up the bag that was laying in the middle of the bed. She had quickly looked in it then dumped it on the bed and out spilled a semi realistic looking dildo and a bottle of lube.

I am not sure when I got the idea that I wanted to try a dildo in my butt. I think it had built over time. I was reading more and more crossdresser and trans erotica, especially as my sex life with Steph seemed to have dwindled down to every couple of months and special occasions. When it did happen it seemed like she was just going through the motions and it was a duty.

As I read the stories, I found myself growing interested in the idea of oral sex with a man. What would it feel like to give a blowjob. When I would watch porn, which I didn't do a lot of, I found myself focusing on the dick of the guy and eventually imagining myself as the girl sucking the man's dick. At some point those same thoughts crept into my brain about anal sex.

"Right that minute... probably not. At some point... I think I would have. I can promise you I haven't hid anything from you since that day. You know I still dress up, and I assume you know that... I... well you know. We just don't talk about it, or you don't see it because that is what you said you wanted." I told her.

"Yes, I know... I know that you go to your storage unit and get your stuff when you are going to be home alone. I know that you fuck yourself with a dildo wishing it was an actual cock in your ass. I wish I didn't know, but I do. I wish I didn't know that I was married to fucking sissy!" The words were very slurred and there was even a little spittle spewing from her.

After the wedding dress incident we entered the current arrangement of don't ask, don't tell. I got a small storage unit and took almost all of my stuff there. My lingerie, shoes, dresses, and a couple of toys were all there and I would bring them home in garment bags, or small duffle bags, or suitcases. I did have a couple pairs of panties hidden in the office still. On days Steph worked and I knew Callie was going to be gone I would sometimes bring them home to satisfy my needs.

"Steph, I am sorry... I am sorry I didn't tell you before we got married, I am sorry wasn't honest when you found the... the panties, I am sorry I hurt you. I wish I could go back and change that. I am not sorry I married you, and I am definitely not sorry you are the mother of our daughter. I love you." I told her, still a little shocked but not surprised by her anger right now.

She didn't respond as her eyes filled with tears. I stood up and threw my beer bottle into the trash and moved to leave the kitchen. I was shocked when her hand reached out and grabbed my arm. I stopped and waited to see if she was going to say something, she squeezed it gently.

When she didn't say anything, I continued out of the kitchen feeling her hand slide down my arm. I went upstairs and got my sleep stuff, a soft pair of athletic shorts and a t shirt, out of the master bedroom and took it into the guest room.

More nights than not I slept in here. On the nights that I did sleep in the master bedroom Steph usually slept in here. We made Callie believe it is was because we were both snorers, or that we both slept restlessly and kept the other up. The real reason though, lying in a bed next to each other seemed to be an intimate act and the intimacy in our relationship had been gone for a long time.