All Comments on 'Not Your Typical Family Ch. 02'

She broke them when she fucked both kids without permission

Redlion75;

Thank you, but the sense of the story was that she would not break her vows to her Master about taking her son as a Master. Not her wedding vows.

But I do get your meaning.

Thanks for the comment.

Barber

Did she not break those by sleeping with someone other then her husband the whole thing where about keep only unto him

I have tried to read this story but it is so out of sink it is giving me a headache. Suddenly one is your girlfriend like when did that happen? Your suddenly a law student when you where in to cyber tech in chapter one. In chapter one she says you where doing things that didn't happen. Get your story outlined before you upload it pleas.

CAN YOU SHARE THEM WITH A OLD MAN LIKE ME? MY E&MAIL IS ALLWORK77629@YAHOO.COM

I don't know if your still writing, but if you are...

You need to pay attention to your own details better. There are so many continuity errors that it is distracting from the story. Names, dates, time; all have been given, changed for no reason, then ignored completely. I think you were so excited to get to the next part, you forgot and if you or your editor re-read it, it was overlooked. Most times with stories here you can expect it every now and again, as we are not professionals, but when it is consistent, like with this story, it's a major distraction.