All Comments on 'Not Your Usual Road Trip'

A good story on a familiar theme. Four stars.

Love it, So please tell us the rest of the story.

Familiar predicament, and highly unlikely. Lots of fun though.

hurry up with the other time

I would like to get mom involved as well.

Nice. I really hope you have the sequel in progress.

Like the other commenter's have said. Tell us the story of when mum joins in.

Not a bad story…. A few awkward bits, as I’m guessing that you’re British, and trying to right from an American point of view? Some minor editing, like using “apartment “, instead of “flat”, would fix most of those issues.

Looking forward to sister being pregnant soon, as she is keen on him finishing inside her. And there has been no mention of any birth control. I am just hoping that their mother soon joins them, and is also quickly pregnant. You pointed out that she is in her late thirties; so se should still be very fertile too.

Breed the little bitch and mom too

Seems like I've read this before...

I agree with Frankie1952. We need the rest of the story.

I hope write a second chapter. This was a really enjoyable story.

Ya'll need to get mom involved guy's. She's got to be crazy horny bi now !

bring the mom in... make it a threesome :-)

More.

Love the sibling sex, especially with mom knowing. Maybe she ought to join in.

Also no mention of birth control. Having children while going to college could be a hardship.

"But that's for another time!"

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I HATE getting to the end of a story and only THEN finding out it's not a complete story. The only thing worse than not using a chapter number for the first chapter, too, would be to post Chapter 02 using a different title.

yes i was so wanting to see the mother and son play as well.

FTDS. Hoping it ends with a pregnant Mom and sister...

The part about several "national MMA" championships was bad enough. But then there's the amount of time it would take to drive from the west coast to their east coast destination. The writer has obviously never driven across the U.S. It would take at least five days, if all three characters dove for eight hours, each... Nonstop... except to refill gas and eat at a fast food place, along the way.

Dude! Your story takes place in the United States, but you don't know how long it takes to drive from one side, to the other! And, if you're going to use American characters, then don't use the metric system.

This was a good fictional fantasy story, but it gets a big fat zero for believability. So freaking many problems here, some of which have already been addressed. But for me, this was just plain ignorance (quote):

"So we inquired about the rooms and found out there were only 2 rooms left. One with a double bed, and one single bed." In my entire lifetime, I have never encountered any motel in the USA where they have a room with just a single bed in it. I once stayed in a mom & pop (or privately owned if you prefer) place that had a queen size bed and a single in the SAME room. But the normal thing is a king size bed by itself or two beds, either doubles or queens.

Less narration and more dialog between the characters, especially in the beginning would have been preferable as well. 3/5

More Please. Though, you don't know anything about road trip times and places in the US, you have a good story line. Build on it and get Mom involved. Continue please.

5 Stars. Very hot! I can't wait to read more.

Interesting though how they went from Nebraska to New Haven in a day - that's quite the distance.

Thanks everyone for reading my 2nd story.

I admit that I'm still an amateur at this. And constantly looking to improve my writing. And as most of you caught on, I'm not from the US so there will be a little bit inconsistency with the time, culture and other things. I'll keep those in my mind the next time I write.

Thanks again for all the feedback. Keep them coming. I'll take all of those into consideration!

Part 2 with the mum please

I feel like I’ve read this story somewhere else I long time ago like I knew the mom was ok with it and everything

For anyone reading that appreciates more realism, this is not the story to read. For unrealistic fluff, its exactly what the Dr ordered. I'm surprised the son wasn't 8" and the women were DD's since that's the norm when the bs gets as thick as this story did.

I liked the development of the situation between brother and sister.

Would like to see chapter two, when mom decides to join her kids

That next chapter needs to hurry up, can't wait to see what that one brings

i want to get into mom....

Maybe not put in place names? The backseat incest is pretty common story and this was ok, but the travel times and destinations were just way off and just kept breaking into enjoyment of the story. You coud make that trip in 4 days, if you average about 11 hours of driving a day, but the places, 300 km from Utah, Cheyenne, Nebraska are just all off with the story time line. You don't do 3 days to go half-way and then finish the other half in a 5 hour final day.

more of this story please