All Comments on 'One Storm Leads to Another'

Meh

This was a 5* until a major miss and then the obscure ending, "Lori" ?!? Since this is the first of your stories I've ever read - it pinged dead to me until I found a comment to clue me in. Being too coy really is arrogant.

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But this miss killed the story for me since he only knew of her CHEAT and the PI only recorded that discovery weekend discussions: "Like this quote from two months ago while you were both lying in our marriage bed after fucking." How the hell did the PI get that discussion?

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3.9****, hooyah

"Though many can forgive injuries, none ever forgave contempt." Benjamin Franklin Nice start.

Then there is this "It turned out Conner and Simms did have souls even if they were lawyers."

Some lawyers not only have souls , they read loving wives particularly when cheaters get what is coming. The courts do their job so do the lawyers in your story. Why show them / myself included contempt? Cheap , trite and unnecessary shot.

Standard fare. Nothing objectionable, but nothing original either.

Ya, like others have asked, who the hell is lori?

Not much of a story--the writer made every cliche in this genre a part of the 'story', and didn't do even that particularly well. The dialogue was stilted and overly formal, the grammar was lacking, and the punctuation suspect. Did I mention the dialogue? Darn... it really is awful.

Pass this on by if you're looking for something to read.

(Anonymous: Couldn’t get past questionable actions and statements.)

All armed forces except CG have ROTC programs, Marines are in conjunction with the Navy. However the Navy does add "N" (NROTC)

Anywho it's still a good story.

Question. How did the P I get into their house and set up audio and video surveillance without keys, knowledge of his address (the lawyer never asked) or gaining his permission to do so?

Question. How does he know of a conversation his wife and her lover had in his bed two months earlier if he only found out about the affair four days ago?

There are just too many unbelievable occurrences. What lawyer is going to call back at about 9,30 or 10.00 on a Friday night? I doubt she would even have her phone turned on let alone answer it. He would be lucky if he got a call back within a week. But not only was there a callback but she organised a P I firm to have someone at the concert before it was over, as well as getting his house put under video and audio surveillance before the lovers returned. Yep, sure, like that's going to happen?

The story lacked originality and has a high number of errors in both grammar and logic.

I liked it more than the commenters I read did. LP

Why drag Lori in at the end? It doesn't make a mediocre story any better. Trying to be cute does you no credit. 3

In spite of the nitpicking anon pricks below, this was a well written interesting story. Worthy of the five stars I gave it. My only complaint is, Vets, not vest. Semper Fi

Ha, ha.

Quite a few questions unanswered here.

But I liked the speed.

And I enjoyed this story.

Top ratings from me.

Thanks for the effort.

5 stars. Enjoyable story will reread again.

Mediocre. I mean not too bad but this is really stale plot, worn out.

Why is so hard for most of authors here to manage some more interesting and original plot? Why write with obviously unoriginal and overused plot idea?

Another thing, is this FGL some country music band? What a crappy taste for an educated person, seems more appropriate for trailer park residents.

Sleazebag was a multiple offender and doing it on company time/property with a subordinate; Henry should've filed a State Bar complaint so David didn't just lose his job but have his law license suspended or revoked. He needs to feel the pain of toxic judgement.

Who the heck is Lori?

Otherwise rather weak.

How can he have a quote from two months ago? I hate authors who don't pay attention to their own stories

Hey guys ... THIS IS HOW IT'S DONE!!!!! The man in this story has self respect and a moral compass

Average story. 1) Who is Lori? as in the ending, yes that Lori? His attorney was Laura. Why pull up a 2 month old conversation when both of them said the same thing Saturday at her kitchen table?

Wow , an author that understands ethics, understands morals, and understands keeping secrets and covering for infidelity is a dangerous game. This stance is so unlike most of the authors here, even the highly rated ones that simply have no clue when it comes to actions like sue in this one. Remarkable turn on the standard Drek we get from so many supposed superior writers.

This story will not pass the feminist vision of divorce out come so there was a brief side step into reality. As dirtyoldman asked who the heck is Lori? Guess I'll have to read more of you earlier stories. Also there twelve retired VETS sitting at a bar not some VESTS. Proofreading can be a real pain but when you get to the end of a really good story telling that one slip flairs up like a lighter in the night of a combat zone.

A pleasant-enough version of this ever-popular favourite tale, -but too heavily parochial to be a true worldwide best seller, as Rustic-Cowboy-Redneck is just TOO "Tex-centric" to travel very far beyond the Mason-Dixon Line, let alone roam beyond the Seven Seas!

Add the sheer arrogance of isolationist presumption of superiority in that "Why SHOULD I have to explain my local cultural references, dialect and idioms to YOU huh? MY English is just as valid as yours- YOU want to read MY stories, -you gotta learn Boy!"

Mind you, some of the errors and bad English does give us a few laughs, like when this Author describes his (inevitable) gang of 12 vigilanté ex-marines as a "bunch of combat-vests" -that WAS a hoot!

Still, good fun, nonetheless!. ABE, -4-Stars! Thank-you!

R.S.

Great story. Thank you for you're efforts. Your a good author.

Nitpicking but learn the difference between your and you're. Degrades an otherwise good story.

RSKY

and THAT is how you burn the bitch and her bastard!

Good story, which shows the turbulence brought on by her actions.

A grammatical point: "Speak your peace" has no meaning! It should be "Speak your piece," which is a separate idiom from "Hold your peace.." "Speak your piece" refers to stating your opinion, or your "piece" or "part" of the conversation. This is at times confused with "hold your peace," which is often associated with marriage objections and refers to remaining silent and peaceful.

(Yep, that Lori)

Is Lori from "Paying The Piper"

She was the douchebag hotel owner's assistant

who the fuck is Lori?

Humiliation, disrespect and down right contempt when a woman cheats on he husband. Many of us have felt all this. Especially when a woman re-married into a group he was associated with and a guy he new personally. The ultimate disrespect and humiliation. Women, can't live with them and you can't kill them. 5 stars

Pretty standard fare except the discovery on thr live stream. He took decisive action. Personally her having a six month affair with her boss, not to mention all the damning audio and testimony by Suzie is more than enough to nuke thr marriage, regardless of whether there are any kids. MC made a big deal.out of the public humiliation on the live stream. As if that was the deal breaker. That makes zero sense. No one knows her or him. Public doesn't care. So what if someone he knows stumbles on it at some point. Her contempt for their marriage and for him is what killed thr marriage. The anonymized humiliation on the Internet should not be thr thing that tips the scales.

Guys, the main character is a marine (Yep, a marine).

I wanted to like this story!

But, no matter how good a PI is, how does their report given to the client include a description, reportedly of a conversation that the two adulterers had after screwing in the client's bed, which occurred at a time that was nearly two months before the PI was hired to be on the case?

So, how was that conversation 'retroactively' recorded?

This was a glaring error that took much of the 'steam' out of the story.

Otherwise, a pretty good story, but .... only 3-stars.

Incorrect word use spoils an average story.

Good to see Lori again.

Guys, the main character is a marine (Yep, a marine).Jesus wept, give me a break. So anonymoose thinks that only a marine can represent the type of male that 1- wouldnt put up w/ a skank slut and 2- would get physical revenge on a slimy POS?(wanted to say predator vs POS but thats inaccurate, slimy turd weasel, is in fact accurate. Many in the us military are just as weaselly, cowardly and slimy as these attys(them being slimy mendacious scum is hardly surprising). example; gen miley betrayed his authority and rank and troops, by cowardly telling chinks, he would warn them if trump went ballistic. That would kill lots of american soldiers if in fact after he warned them, we did go to war w/ them, miley is a cowardly weasel pussy caring naught for the well being of the troops at all (just for his pension, the chance to award himself mo medals and the perks a gen gets everywhere), which made it unsurprising that he went all in for woke BS, didnt resight when the democraps fucked up afgan retreat and stands for nothing honorable. Enlisted and officers thruout the services display the same poor character and moral defects of the 2 attys, military people dont walk on water , even sf/seals lose touch w/ their honor sometimes, so back off on whatever was meant by;;;Guys, the main character is a marine (Yep, a marine). so what? turdboi! the MC acted like most men hope they would under similar circumstance, exempting all democrap males who are lucky when 1 nut descends and they have to shave 1xweeek, and even luckier when they produce viable, tho weak sperm. rk

Who the fuck is Lori? - Good story with the cheaters paying the price.

The retroactive recording of the lovers' conversation is indeed a mystery. Otherwise, a good story.

Glad to know it was THAT Lori. Was confusing her with the other Lori, or Laurie, or ......well yeah

CINCO ESTRELLAS!

The story was ok. However, I find it hard to believe, that the wife would be so openly callous to her husband, who she claims to be in love with. But I guess that money and fame changes people. Some where along the line, they believe their higher social status, or job, makes them better than everyone else. If wifey had an ounce of brains, she would have NOT went to the concert with her boss, and NOT have fucked him in her marital bed. That is the equivalent of the queen opening the back door of the castle, so the mongol hordes could pillage and rape the population! This was not a normal tale of cheating. It demanded a bigger response, more btb. And punching out David, would have gotten him arrested. Liked the plot, but not the ending. 4 stars.

ps- The Lori comment was stupid.

I disagree. The btb level was appropriate. No kids were involved. No forced debasement. She had a long affair with her boss. It was highly sexually charged and she had feelings for her boss. She claimed ro love her husband bur obviously not in a believable way. She didn't offer platitudes and admitted she had no excuse. Sge killed his love for her and was a scheming bitch without to have her cover. She stupidly represented herself and fought the divorce. No alimony and 7 months later divorced. No kids, no STDs and no accidental or intended impregnation. The guy git his face bashed in. Why would you want a more severe btb? She lives alone, lost her friends, family barely talks to her, and she fucks one night stand on a Frifay night when before she was close to starting a family. She broke his heart. She didn't kill him. Now when kids are involved and the cheating wife plans to keep them from him, or charges mental cruelty, or steals his money or makes him eat creampies, etc, yeah then can see an escalation. Except for the public humiliation factor, which personally who the bleep cares, that pales to me ag least about the six month affair and all the terrible audio of love and intimacy, this was a pretty standard adultery and divorce scenario. She is a self-centered bitch, who killed their future, but have read stories with a lot worse loving wives on here.

Well, Henry did BTB and even gave the "Dick" some lumps so I guess it all worked out in the end. Seems Henry was a little hung up on being humiliated, mostly by people he didn't even know. I'm guessing "that Lori" is an inside joke, but kind of left most of us wondering. Not a great story, but I liked it.

WTF, who is Lori?

A bit irrealistc about the timing for the PI to act

GREAT -- THANKS FOR THE WONDERFUL HOUR YOU GAVE TO ME.

Average

GREAT story!!!!!!!!!!

If you read his AMAZING story "Paying the Piper", you will know which Lori entered in the picture 😉

Loved it. A pissed off Vet is worse than a tornado.

Yet again another marine is cucked. Surprised he doesn't also play golf and drink some specialised expensive cuck juice passing itself off as alcohol.

How the hell did he get this information that was actually included with the divorce papers she was served 5 days after discovering her cheating? (just copied and pasted)

Like this quote from two months ago while you were both lying in our marriage bed after fucking.

"David, I just can't get enough of you! We must be so careful. If Diane or Henry ever find out, we'll have to call it quits and I don't want to ever stop making love with you!"How was he able to repeat her exact words that were spoken 2 months ago from his bed when she was with her lover.

Really enjoyed it.

I found myself feeling angry of how Mel was disrespecting Henry and scheming with David the Dick. One thing, you don't fuck with a marine. They support each other life long.

This should be in the non-erotic category.

Liked the story but wished there was more with Henry & Lori- what happened if anything.

For the commenter 24 days ago, talking about a cucked Marine: how the fuck can you say that? Henry didn't do anything to retaliate? Didn't smash the prick's face in, serve divorce papers to his wife, feed the info to the guy's wife, or speak to her now ex-friend that covered for her? What story did you read? It was def not this one. What would you have wanted? Not every time is there needed physical violence to both parties, or even one?

This was a good story, deserving 4 stars. Bob

First off cowboy boots NEVER look sexy on women. They just look like white trash. Get Arollo or Casadei boots with you're wanting to be the epitome of sexy.

Secondly, if you listen to Florida Georgia Line, you probably deserved to be fucked...

Awesome--that Lori! Very cool ending.

*****

Christ Almighty

Aren't there enough sluts already in San Antonio? Why not send her to Lubbock? Yeah I know, That'll Be The Day. Signed: BTW

Excellent story. Perfect story would have David getting a beating every two weeks until he decides to move to California.

I think it's funny how these husband find their wives cheating and keep it a secret. Then as soon as the wife feels wronged they immediately say something. And the husbands all have some sneaky plan for revenge instead of handling it themselves. Not necessarily start something wit the guy, your not in a relationship with him, but at least tell him to back off till the divorce is final. And then vent your frustrations out on the wife,

Nice story, well put together, not over the top in actions.

Henry is nothing more than a cuckold wimp. Letting the cheating slut stay in the house..bullshit. The locks would have been changed and her shit would have been, none to carefully, thrown out onto the front yard.

Well-written and quite enjoyable, thanks

decorated combat vests…

Seriously? U have combat vests whit whom he can sit?

How did he get a transcript of something she said two months before he hired a private investigator?

Oh, and please stop with the bullet points. It's poor form.

4 stars. I’ve read better but it’s hard to write something different in this category.

Bill S.

I have to laugh at the Anons who think he should’ve changed the locks, thrown her stuff in the driveway and just shut her out completely. I guess they don’t understand that a court order could get him thrown in jail for doing all that. Get a clue, airheads.

Good story, TTT, thanks for bringing it.

5*****

You have no “soul” in your writing.

Love your writing.

5*****++!!

What kind of officer of Marines cries like a little pussy when he's ambushed? He obviously never went to The Basic School! You overwrite too much, which is the bane of amateur writing. When she goes to hug him after the confrontation, he shuns her. We KNOW why he did, because you told a decent story. However, you went on to elaborate. There's a well-known phrase in writing: trust your reader. That begins with trusting your own ability to tell us something in a way that we recall it or understand its downstream effects.

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You need an editor/proofreader. We saw "combat vets" turned to "combat vests."

@Oatmeal1969: Non-erotic category? Heck, it should have been in Sci-Fi/Fantasy, since it included time travel. "Someone" went back into the past to get a transcript having quotes from a conversation that occurred "2 months ago", when Henry, his attorney, and his PI could only have learned of it (at the earliest) on "Friday last".

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Aside from that "laugh-er" episode where Henry confronted his cheating wife with this (presently) impossible tidbit, I enjoyed the story -- 4-stars worth (otherwise would have been 5)!

I want to see and hear more about Lori! I like that girl. Hope she gets a happy ending, she's a standup woman.

Very memorable story one of my all-time favorites ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Thanks for a well-written and very satisfying tale. It's always gratifying to see the offending parties gt their comeuppance. Excellent writing!

Good story, I gave it 5 stars, a score I don’t often give.

But this part, “Like this quote from two months ago while you were both lying in our marriage bed after fucking” seemed odd. He just discovered the affair, but he knows what they said 2 months ago?

Lori?

Lori? I guess I missed her.

Ok. Now I know that the Lori character comes from "Paying the Piper". It would have been helpful if there had been a note at the beginning of this story to read that one first.

FINALLY!! A writer who gets it!! 5 *****. I wish I could give you 100 *.

You said: "Though many can forgive injuries, none ever forgave contempt." quoting Benjamin Franklin.

THAT'S IT!!

It isn't MC's "fragile male ego", someone played w/ his toys" or even "it didn't take anything away from you/us."

It is CONTEMPT and DERISION.

And THAT doesn't deserve a second chance. One is more than enough.

BRAVO Author! Bravo!

Its OK, but Mel simply didn't make any sense. If she's cringing at being in the eye of a camera, why doesn't she realize she's in the eye of Everyone who is at the concert, in their local town? She didn't go through any sudden or special character change, she was just being who she is, who her stupid cuck married. And who's fault is that? He got what he married so he deserves what he got. I hope someone writes the sequel where Mel runs into Lori and her Ex, with their children. Which Mel will never have because of the venereal disease she acquired from one of her fuck toys at the bars she frequents. That would be the very best revenge, fucking over her own future and killing off her own potential children before they are even conceived.

Pretty good story, ttt, thanks for sharing. I had two questions but an earlier comment explained who Lori was,

so now I have one question: If Henry only found out about Melanie and David the previous Friday when he saw them on tv, how did he get a transcript of Melanie and David’s conversation in his (Henry’s) bed from two months ago. Unless he had his house wired for audio and/or video already? In which case he (Henry) should have already known Melanie was cheating. Maybe his PI just made up that conversation? I don’t know. Anyone care to “ ‘splain’”

that one? Still, all in all, a pretty good story. Thanks again for posting it.

Dee

1) Who is Lori? She isn't in this story until the very end. 2) If his PI wired his house on Friday, how does he has audio from 2 months ago?

To previous anon because his wife and dick reminisced about their affair in the kitchen, fk some of you read at a 3rd grade level. Great story, man the system is fk'd , you support these ungrateful whores for years and the better you treat them the more it costs you when they betray you. They are truly pure evil, self-entitled narcissistic whores. That's why it's said (a man will readily sacrifice his happiness for his family, a woman will readily sacrifice her family for her happiness!)