One Too Many

"I hope you won't be, but I'll respect your privacy," he told her.

"Thank you for understanding, Justin. And thank you for getting me home last night. I read your text, by the way. That was very sweet of you."

"All right. I uh, I hope you feel better soon."

"I will. And again, thank you for everything, and please don't think the woman you saw last night was me, okay?"

He laughed then told her, "I liked the woman I saw last night. And once she's back in town, I wouldn't mind seeing her again."

Kellie felt too bad to even smile, but she did thank him again.

"Okay. Well, I'll uh...see you around then."

"Bye, Justin. Take care, okay? Oh. I have a way to get my car later on, okay?"

"Okay. Well...you feel better."

Justin walked away, and as much as he wanted to see her again, he decided to not contact her anymore. But he really was a changed man in the sense that he would now seriously consider dating women from a few to many years older than him, assuming he found them interesting. The only other caveat was they had to be single.

Two weeks passed, and Justin had mostly stopped thinking about his one night out with Kellie Seals when he got a phone call at work. He'd just finished doing equipment checks when he felt his phone vibrate.

"I'll be darned," he said when he saw the name.

"Hello?" he said, pretending not to know who was on the other end.

"Justin? Hi. You may not remember me, but..."

"I remember you, Kellie," he said in a way that told her he was smiling.

"Oh, right. I know why, and I guess I was calling because I haven't been able to let go of how badly I embarrassed myself. I've had enough guilt and shame for one life, and yet I caused myself even more by, well..."

"Having one too many?" he offered, still sounding light and playful.

"Yes. That would be the polite way of saying 'making a total fool out of myself'. And in front of a total stranger who was being very nice to me."

"I think you're being a little too hard on yourself," Justin told her.

"Maybe, but I haven't been able to let this go. I really don't drink like that, and I need you to know that and believe me."

"I believe you," he said immediately.

"Thank you. That means so much to me. I've always tried to live a life of integrity and even more so since things went sour in my marriage, so doing something that foolish is...well, to me, it's...unforgivable."

"And yet I forgive you," he told her.

"But I haven't forgiven myself," she said very kindly. "If we could possibly meet somewhere, and...talk...I think it would go along way to helping me recover my sense of dignity again."

"Sure. Just say when and where."

It took Kellie a few seconds to respond, and Justin asked if she was still there.

"Yes. Sorry. I think I expected you to politely tell me there was no way on earth you'd ever waste another minute of your time with me. So your response surprised me."

"All kidding aside, I not only had a nice time with you, I learned something about myself from the few short hours we spent together."

There was another pause before she said, "Like avoiding divorced, middle-aged women who claim they rarely drink?"

Justin laughed and told her, "No. Not that. I'll save what it was for when we get together again."

After yet another pause, Kellie said, "Justin? Thank you for not being judgmental. I probably do enough of that for two people, and I'm relieved to know you don't..."

She stopped, thought for a moment, then said, "I don't actually know what you think of me, but I'll assume you at least don't hate me."

"Hate you? Why would I hate you?"

"Sorry. That's something else I'm working on. I'll stop beating myself up now, and just say I'm looking forward to talking to you in hopes of...clearing my name."

"Where did you what to meet?" he asked.

"Do you know where 'Black Drop' is?"

"Sure. It's over on Champion Street."

"Right. It's a nice, quaint little coffee shop, and if that's okay with you, I was thinking we could meet there."

"I'd be happy to. What time?"

"If I remember correctly, you work nights, so it might be best to work around your schedule. I'm currently unemployed, so...you choose."

"I'm on all night, but I could meet you tomorrow around noon. Will that work?"

"That's perfect," she said.

"Then I'll see you there, Kellie."

"Okay. I'll look forward to it, Justin. You take good care, okay?"

"Will do, and you do the same."

When he turned around, his captain was standing there with his arms folded.

"I swear, you must have dated every woman in Bellingham by now, Justin."

"Not yet, Cap'n. But I'm working on it. Did you need something?"

"Not unless you know how to handle a teenaged daughter," the older man replied.

"Oh. No. Not me. No, sir. Good luck with that!"

"I swear when girls turn 14 or 15 they lose their friggin' minds."

"Again, good luck with that one, Cap'n."

"Oh. I forgot why I was over here. Jeez. I'm not that old, for cryin' out loud," the fire captain said as he shook his head.

"What's up, boss?"

"My wife wanted me to ask you to join us for dinner a week from Saturday. And feel free to bring a date. You know, if you can somehow manage to find one."

The captain was fairly new, and he'd been having every member of the firehouse over one at a time to get to know them. Justin hadn't given it any thought, but knew his time was coming.

"That sounds great. I'm not sure about a 'plus one', but if I can find someone willing to tag along with me, I'll let you know in advance."

"Yeah. It must be tough being you. I pity you trying to find a woman willing to spend time with the likes of your ugly ass."

Justin laughed just before the captain said, "My wife saw you here once, and ever since, she calls you Thor."

"Oh, man. Should I even ask why?" he asked, pretending he'd never heard that before.

"The movie. The guy that plays Thor. I can't remember names for shit, but she says you look like him."

Justin laughed again, and asked him to tell his wife he said 'thanks'.

The captain stood there and looked at him then said, "You kind of do, you know. If you grew your hair out. And if it was blonde..."

"And if I was taller, and bigger, and better looking," Justin added as they both laughed.

The truth was he did kind of resemble the actor who's name was Chris Hemsworth, a 35-year old Australian who was 6' 3".

As usual, Justin blew off the compliment as he once again saw the image of himself weighing 300 pounds looking back at him in his mind's eye. And that made him think about Kellie and her insecurities in spite of being one of the nicest looking women he'd ever met.

Saturday morning dawned bright and clear, and Justin found himself looking forward to summer. It was early June, and June was often gray and chilly like the rest of the year, but July and August always brought the best weather of the year. The unusually blue sky was something he hoped boded well for at least the next couple of months.

He was up early and at the gym shortly after as he usually was. He did a killer chest and biceps workout then went home and showered and got ready to meet Kellie. It wasn't all that warm, but for northwestern Washington, 65 degrees with sunshine was a real treat.

He pulled on a dark-blue, three-button Henley, a short-sleeved, collared shirt and a pair of light-gray shorts and some tennis shoes before blow drying his hair and combing it out.

He nearly laughed when he briefly saw the resemblance to the guy who played Thor. He actually did laugh when he raised his arms and flexed them. Just like working the catering gig and hearing nicer things from women, it was 'nicer' to look strong and healthy, but what he wanted most was to be appreciated for the person he was, rather than the way he looked. Maybe that was unusual for a guy, but it was the way he felt, and that wasn't going to change.

He checked his watch then grabbed his wallet and keys and headed toward the coffee shop, arriving ten minutes early. He'd had the hardest time being prompt when he was younger, and that was one more thing he forced himself to change as he was transforming his body over that 2-3 year period.

Now people occasionally told him, "Justin? You now you're gonna be early for your own funeral, right?"

He hoped that wasn't the case but understood the comment. He glanced at his watch again, and when he looked up, he saw her walking on the sidewalk leading to the front of the building.

Kellie looked elegant and sophisticated at the wedding reception, but she looked just as beautiful to him dressed much more casually.

Her long hair was in a ponytail, and she was wearing a salmon-colored top with a pair of white shorts along with white sandals and earrings that were that matched. She had much less makeup on, and yet she looked even prettier to him than she had at the country club.

He stepped up to the door, opened it for her from the inside, and said, "Hi there," to her as she stepped in.

Startled, she looked up and saw him smiling at her.

"Justin. Hi. I didn't see you standing there."

He thought about telling her that was because she'd been looking down the entire way, but instead told her, "Wow. You really look nice."

"Thank you!" she said sincerely, "and you look very nice yourself."

"Thanks. I'm so over the penguin look," he told her with a smile.

"Right! The black and white thing. Yes, this agrees with you," she said with a smile that truly amazed him.

"Come on. Let's go get some coffee," he suggested before opening the second door for her.

She thanked him then waited for him to catch up.

They ordered and Kellie insisted on paying.

"I have no idea how the bill got paid at the night club, but I know I didn't pay it, so please let me get this, okay?"

Justin gave her a look which made her laugh.

"Does that bother you?" she asked.

"I'm just kind of old fashioned about this sort of thing. I'd feel a lot better if you let me pay for your coffee."

"That's very sweet of you to offer, but I drug you out here, so the least I can do is buy you a cup of coffee."

She looked right at him, smiled, then said, "Please?" with a little shrug of her shoulders.

"You're very hard to say 'no' to," Justin told her.

The barista called out their names, and that ended the back and forth.

"Thank you," Justin said when Kellie gave the girl a ten-dollar bill. The girl thanked her when she told her to keep the change.

They found a quiet place to sit, and Justin said, "So...?" just before taking a first sip.

"Yes. Right. Wow. Where to even start," Kellie said before talking a sip of her own.

"For obvious reasons, a lot of that night is a blur to me," she began. "So I'll start there by again apologizing for having...what did you say? One too many?"

Justin nodded as he took another sip but didn't say anything.

"I do remember telling you some personal things I've never told anyone but my very best friend who lives down in Seattle. I can't believe I said them—either."

"I don't recall anything too personal," he told her truthfully.

"The uh...the smoking thing?" she said, a pained look on her face.

"Oh, right. Yeah. I actually checked that out online and you were right. There's a whole...niche out there that caters to men with that particular fetish."

Kellie ignored that and told him, "It makes me look so weak and pathetic. I mean, what kind of woman would do something so drastic and...unhealthy? For anyone?"

"I don't know. Someone willing to do whatever it takes to make a relationship work?" he offered.

The look on her face changed before she said, "That must have been why I told you. You have this way of making me feel so...at ease or something."

"Then I'm glad you told me," he said before mentioning his weight. "Look, I shared my most embarrassing part of my life with you, too, and I rarely ever do that. But you also made me feel at ease, and I felt comfortable doing it."

"Yes, but..."

Kellie was going to mention how dangerous her addiction was before realizing being that overweight was possibly even more harmful to one's health.

"Addictions are awful," she ended up saying.

"I agree."

"I guess with food, though, you can't just up and quit cold turkey," she said with a little smile.

"No. That makes staying alive very difficult," Justin replied, really smiling for the first time.

"I just up and quit...smoking. Cold turkey. I got so sick of the coughing and the addiction itself. And because my..."

She stopped and said, "You see. I was about to share something else personal, and all I wanted to do was apologize to you and let you know I'm not a...drunk. Or maybe 'lush' is the more polite word."

Kellie smiled, too, and when she did, Justin was deeply taken with her beauty. Kellie noticed he was fixated on her face and asked what was wrong.

"Is there something in my teeth?" she asked as she reached for her compact.

"No. Nothing like that," he told her.

"Oh. Okay," she replied, now wondering why he'd been staring.

"Anyway, I did quit, and ever since, I've tried to be the best person I can possibly be, and even more so when my husband left me shortly after I told him I was done with his fetish and the control, and all of the..."

She stopped for a moment then said, "I still fall short far too often, and the worst case of that...ever...was getting..."

"Tipsy?" Justin suggested.

"Ha! I was 'tipsy' after the first drink. Well, the first 'double'."

"How about this? How about we forget about the drinking altogether and maybe just talk?" Justin again suggested.

"I didn't expect you'd want to," Kellie told him. "I was pretty sure you were counting the minutes until I said what I needed to say so you could excuse yourself and get away from Crazy Lady."

Justin took a full sip, swallowed, then with a straight face said, "Nope. I wasn't thinking anything like that at all. In fact, I was just sitting her thinking how much I enjoy talking with you."

Kellie had been looking at him, but when he told her that, she looked down at her coffee cup.

"Oh. Okay," she said rather quietly. "I have no idea why, but that's...that's very nice of you to say."

"Kellie?" he said, waiting for her to look at him.

When she finally did, he said, "I find you intelligent and charming."

He paused then added, "And very interesting. And...beautiful."

She looked away again then said, "I...that can't..."

She looked up at him then asked, "Why would you even say something like that, Justin?"

"Why wouldn't I?" he gently asked.

"That...that doesn't make any sense," she told him.

"Why is that?" he asked, his head tilted slightly to one side.

"Oh, gee. Let me see," she said. "Well, for starters you just happen to be um...gorgeous. Then there's the fact that I'm...well, I'm older than you, and not by just a couple of years. And because I am that means I look...older. And men like you don't look at women like me, so..."

"We don't, huh? Where'd you hear that?" he asked with another amazing smile.

"No one needs to actually say it, it's...it's just...common sense," she told him very definitively.

"Oh, okay. But...why is it then that I AM looking at you like that?" he asked just as seriously. "And why can't I stop looking at you, if that really is 'common sense'?"

She was looking at him when he said that, and although she might be wrong, everything she knew about people told her he was being serious. And that's when the unthinkable hit her.

"Wait. Do you...do you maybe have some kind of, you know...fetish?"

Justin shook his head very quickly, raised his eyebrows then said, "Fetish? What kind of...fetish?"

"I...I don't know. But I'd never heard of a smoking fetish, either, so now I'm wondering if you maybe have some kind of...thing...for older women. I'm wondering that because nothing else makes any sense. I mean, you could literally date anyone you want, so if you're telling me you're interested in me, I have to have a valid reason that makes sense—to me."

Justin sat up straight then said, "So finding you beautiful, intelligent, and charming, isn't reason enough?"

Kellie just looked up for a couple of seconds then said, "What concerns me is that that's how you see me."

"Then I'm not sure what else there is to say, because I've been completely honest with you about everything," he told her in a gentle way. "And I've said those things because they're the truth."

"You don't find it...odd? At all?" she asked, trying to allow for the possibility he might actually feel that way.

"I didn't. But your reaction is making me wonder if I should have said anything—at all," he told her just as politely as before.

"So...so what are you saying, Justin?" Kellie asked, as she sat across from this incredibly handsome, much-younger man who was looking at her in a way men his age hadn't looked in many years.

"Before I answer that, let me tell you what it is I learned from our time at the night club."

Kellie sat there listening, trying hard to understand what was going on, but didn't reply.

"I've never even dated a woman who's older than me by more than a year or two. But I found myself so...taken with you...I decided I'd never again let age keep me from getting to know I woman I find attractive."

He paused then said, "And I find you very attractive."

He smiled even though she didn't, and told her, "So what I'm saying is—I like you, Kellie. A lot. And I'd really like to go out with you. On an actual date."

"You...would?" she asked, her voice rising.

"Yes. I would. Very much so, in fact."

"I'm tempted to ask 'why' again, but I can tell you're being honest. Which confuses me. Totally."

"Have you been to 'Big Rock Garden Park' in awhile?" he asked.

"It's been quite a few years," she replied very quietly as she realized Justin was asking her out.

"Me, either. Maybe we could spend some time there just walking around together and maybe have lunch before or after."

"I really am struggling to understand why you want to...go out with me...but, if you do. If you're sure. Then...yes. I'd...I'd love to do that. With you."

"This nice weather isn't going to last. How would you like to maybe go over there...right now?" he suggested, a warm smile on his handsome face.

"As in...now, now?" she asked, unaware her heart was beating faster.

"I believe that's what 'now' means," he replied, still smiling at her.

"The weather is beautiful," she said as she looked outside.

"So? What do you think?"

She looked right at him then said, "I think I'm losing my mind."

"No worries. I'll help you search for it. I promise," he told her with a straight face.

Kellie finally smiled, and that allowed Justin to laugh quietly. That, in turn, released a lot of the pressure that was building up inside of Kellie, and she finally laughed, too.

"In that case, I think that sounds very nice," she told him.

"Then let's do this," Justin said as he stood up.

He moved to her side of the booth, offered her his hand, and after looking down for a moment, Kellie looked up at him, returned his smile, then offered him her hand.

"Thank you," she said very sweetly as she stood there in front of him.

"You really are beautiful, you know," he told her, causing her to look away again.

"Oh. I uh, I need my purse," she said, giving her an excuse to avoiding looking at him while she tried to collect her thoughts even as she wondered what in the world she was doing.

When she turned around again, he'd stepped back a bit and had his arm out for her to take. She looked at it, looked at him, then put her arm through it and let him lead her outside.

"Do you want to ride together again?" he asked as they approached his car.

"Again?" she asked before it hit her. "Oh, right. Sorry. Um...sure. That would be fine."