Our Inner Demons

Twice a week.

In general, that's how often I see my boyfriend. Yes, on a rare week, I might see him more than that. Sometimes, I spend the weekend with him. If it starts on Friday and ends on Sunday, that's three days. There are a lot of weeks when I might see him only once. Occasionally, life interrupts and we skip a whole week. I hate those weeks.

Alvin is my lover. He's my bull or even my boyfriend. He's my side-piece. He doesn't complete me, but his presence redefines me. He redefines my marriage, too.

Without Alvin, I'm just another suburban soccer mom. I'm the same as the other women in front or behind me at the school's pick-up lane. I'm the cute Mom jogging behind a stroller with giant wheels. I'm doing the Lizard Pose, the Butterfly Press, or the Frog Pose in yoga class. You can call me a MILF, but without Alvin, I am nothing special. Nothing to see here. I'm a thirty-something Mom with forty staring her down.

We call him my boyfriend. Alvin wasn't my first boyfriend. He probably won't be my last one, either. He is white, like me and my hubby. That's not a choice, it simply is. There aren't a lot of black guys around me. I'm not lusting for BBC. Alvin doesn't have a giant cock, but he does have a wife and kids of his own in case that means something to you. He also knows how to make me squirm and feel like an absolute slut. Fuck, I love that!

Do I love Alvin? No, not really. Not like how I love my husband or my girls. I do love how Alvin can make me feel. That's special. That's addictive. When I first started dating Alvin, I apparently acted like a schoolgirl with a crush, but that was simply puppy love. I was the same way with Eric, the guy I dated before Alvin. And with James, the guy before Eric. Like I said, Alvin's not my first side piece.

Alvin is my spa day. He's my escape from being Mom and wife to Brandon. He's my reminder that deep down inside lives a wanton slut who wants to be used, controlled, and exposed. He's the reason I keep my pussy shaved and why I get a full Brazilian waxing several times a year. He's the reason why I wear a butt plug up my ass beneath a dress that's too tight as I drive to the hotel to meet him. He's not why I pierced my nipples. Eric was why I did that.

Tuesday and Saturday nights are Alvin's nights. It's not a hard and fast rule. We've hooked up on Thursday afternoons or started on Friday night and we didn't stop until Sunday morning. I met him once on a Monday morning and sucked his cock in the parking lot of a Target before he went back to work. We have talked about going away for a week on a cruise, one of those swinger cruises. I doubt that we'll ever do it, but it's fun and exciting to think about.

I don't know Alvin's wife and I doubt that she knows about me. He tells me that she's on lots of medicine for reasons. Depression. Bipolar disorder. I don't know. Reasons. He claims those medicines have dried up her interest in sex. He says he loves her and will never leave her. He's older than me. They have two kids, both grown, married, and successful. He's very proud of them. No grandkids, not yet, probably soon. He knows all about my Brandon and a little bit about my girls.

My husband is a sensual, romantic partner in bed. He is eager to please, perhaps too eager? As determined as he is to please me, there's one thing I cannot accept from him. He cannot control me. He's just too sweet of a man. Hearing Brandon commanding me to bend over and finger my needy asshole would be laughable. If Brandon ever called me a slut or a whore or a bitch, I would slap the shit out of him. Brandon reveres me. He worships me. Just ask him. He tells me that all the time. I love him dearly and desperately.

I also love that my husband stays shaved smooth in front and in the back. We are even talking about him getting laser treatment to make that look permanent. I love how excited he gets while shaving my pussy for date night with Alvin. Brandon might be a boss at work, but at home, he's my subbie little beta boy. He's a bisexual pervert who needs to be kept in his place. I think it's funny that he's the size queen of the family. He's the one addicted to BBC when he can find it. With his travel schedule, he can find it quite often, too. He's arguably a bigger cumslut than me and loves anal as much or more, too.

Brandon and I make love at least four times a week. Twice a week, Brandon is reclaiming me after my time with Alvin. He loves it and so do I. Most of the time, Brandon is my dessert after a great session with my lover. Sometimes, my lover is merely an appetizer for the fun I'll have with my husband when I get home. One or twice a week, we have fun in our more traditional ways. We make love to each other and it's nice. It's really nice. I love it.

Brandon has never met Alvin. They have seen pictures of each other. Alvin has seen family pictures from trips to Disney or wherever. Brandon has seen pictures of my mouth wrapped around Alvin's big, thick cock. He's seen me bent over and getting fucked up the butt. He's also seen a few social media pictures, too.

At work and around the neighborhood, my husband is a strong, well-built man. He's a home handyman who built our beautiful backyard deck and the swingset our girls loved when they were younger. I've seen how other women look at him, but he's all mine. No one would suspect that my strong, handsome, and virile husband knows where every gloryhole is on his travels. He loves to suck cock. He loves being on his knees getting fucked up the ass, too. It frustrates and embarrasses him that I won't let him have pubic hair. It makes him hard and needy and we both love it when he feels like that. My date nights are an aphrodisiac for our lust.

Alvin isn't interested in Brandon. He knows, but he doesn't care about him. He'll tease me about heading home to my sissy of a husband. Brandon is bi, but he's not a sissy. It's complicated, though, and I don't correct Alvin. For a man like Alvin, any man who sucks dick or takes it up the butt is gay. He can't see Brandon as a real man. I can. To me, my husband is a real man who just happens to have a demon inside of him. He has a demon like mine and I guess our demons help define us.

When we met and married, Brandon and I were devoted to each other. It was nice. We were in love. We still are, but in time, we wondered if there could be something different. Something more. It started as a threesome with another man. A friend of ours. A nice guy we both trusted. Someone who didn't live too close. Randy didn't know Brandon was bi. That didn't matter. That wasn't the point of that first night. It was a "me" night and it was glorious.

Brand loved seeing me with Randy as much as I loved being groped and taken by this other man. I had nearly forgotten how other men could be more forceful. Randy was rough with my breasts, cruelly twisting and biting my nipples until they stung. He flopped me around and made me do things while teasing me, "You like that, don't you?" And he was right. I did. A lot. I missed being treated like that.

After Randy left, Brand couldn't keep his hands or mouth off of me. He couldn't stop talking about how sexy it looked watching me suck cock and then he kissed me. "I loved seeing you doing that," he said before kissing me again. "And when he fucked you," he groaned, kissing down my body until he was eating me out. He looked up to add, "I wish he had gone bareback."

I felt like his queen. I felt like my husband's personal slut without Brand being the guy who made me one. It was an odd sensation, but I loved it. I told him, "Next time, let's find a guy who wants to do you, too."

It took months for that to happen. Eventually, we found a guy who wanted us both. I knew about my husband's past. I knew he had had his same-sex experiences. To be honest, so had I. It's called "college" and we had both experimented. I like pussy, but I love dick. I think my husband is the same way.

His name was Harold. He was a musician in a cover band that performed on weekends. He had long hair and despite being short and thin, he had a sexy swagger about him that I liked. He didn't want to suck cock, but he didn't care if Brandon did. He was fine with that, especially if it meant he got to be with me, too. I straddled his face, facing Harold's big cock while my husband knelt between his legs. For the first time, I witnessed my husband sucking cock and I learned a thing or two, too

As Brand attacked Harold's big, long cock, I learned that my husband truly loves cock. Brandon attacked that poor man's hard cock like a starving fat boy would attack a footlong hotdog. It was his first cock since before we were wed and how much he missed cock showed every eager bob of his head. His voracious need to have that cock deep inside his mouth showed, but what he really wanted was a mouthful of cum and he was determined to get it. That was the second thing I learned. I learned that nothing can beat a blowjob where the sucker is determined to taste cum. I learned how to tease with my mouth, but I also learned something about how to please with my mouth. My blowjobs have never been the same since then.

After Randy and Harold, there were other men and it was almost always another man. We tried the swinger scene for a moment. While I sometimes miss pussy, it's not the same as how much I want dick. Seeing my husband with another woman did nothing for me. It did nothing for him, either. We both want dick.

Nothing happens overnight. It can feel that way, but when it does, you're probably ignoring all the smaller things that lead up to the magical overnight sensation. Our first overnight sensation happened when a potential partner for a threesome wanted to hook up with Brandon without me. Ultimately, Johnson turned out to be more gay than straight. I never met him, but I did experience the thrill of knowing my husband was on a date, with another man, and that he was probably having sex. Fuck, that turned me on.

Brandon came home with a story about how he went gay with this other man. He told me how forceful Johnson had been, how he had a big cock, and how he made Brandon suck him off. He told me how Johnson had made him worship his cock and it turned me on. I wanted that. I wanted to feel the same way. I wanted a man who would force me to my knees and shove his cock inside my eager mouth. When Brand told me about getting fucked, my asshole clenched with need.

"I want that," I said, cumming because of his story. "I want to feel used like that."

It took several tries with several different men before I found that, too. I tend to gloss over those failed attempts and that frustrates Brandon. When he read this, he pointed out how I was leaving off the thrill we had of him waiting at home for me to come home, except this isn't about him. It's about me first, us second, and I felt like a total slut going out on a date without my man. And I loved that feeling.

I'm married. I'm a Mom. I live in a nice house on a quiet side street where husbands wash cars in their driveway every Saturday in the summer. I do yoga three times a week. I run and I'm active in our church. I guess I'm pretty enough. I sometimes wish my tits were bigger, but I don't want implants, I just want to fill out my dress better. I hate wearing heels even if they do accentuate my calves.

I'm also a slut married to a bi-husband who loves cock as much as me. He loves me as I am and how I once was. I feel the same way about him. We also love our demons. Being with others isn't an everyday experience, but the positive impact it has on our lives sure is!