All Comments on 'Owning the Neighbors'

Very nicely done

It was nice dream but I think there's more to it did the guy after becoming a woman get the parts of a woman that would make him pregnant

The kicker is that it wasn't a dream.

Details are in the reading and foreshadowed in the introduction. I made an effort to stay clear of the dream aspect. This was primarily a story that leans towards a paradox that encompassed past, present, and future. I also intended it to be a quirky erotic horror story using my previous statement as a means to interweave all the variables.

How does Jennifer exist if Jessie didn't become her? Is her ghost a product of what already occurred? By scaring the homeowners from her house, did she influence Mr. Johnson with the idea that leads him to become the monster? Yet, how is that possible if Jesse hadn't yet gone through the experience that would make him Jennifer?

As for him becoming a woman with a womb, the answer is, no. That's not possible in real life even with a surgical procedure. Factually, a man can be fully transitioned into a woman with all attributes that would define that person as a female, but I'm not privy to any scientific data that suggests that it's even possible to transplant the female reproductive organs into a man to make impregnation a viable option. Although this is a twisted story, I tried hard to keep it grounded in reality as much as possible. As stated in the story, a man can become a woman, but there's no magic pill and it doesn't happen overnight. Ask a trans-woman and they'll tell you it's a long journey.

Anyway, this story was another attempt to try something new and unusual. Sometimes I hit the right spot and at times I flub one up. Some people will enjoy the story and some won't. I fully took this into account when I decided to write this one.

Thanks,

Rusty Zipper

Based on a previous post, I decided to clarify the story.

Jessica’s story is her past life experience, not a dream.

Dreams are cheap and take away from the impact of a story.

As such, I intentionally avoid writing them.

Jessica's intent is to use her personal experience to scare the homeowners into abandoning the house where she lives. The mystery of her existence is explained in her introduction. To an extent, it’s a paradoxical reality as Jesse doesn’t experience the terrors that transform him into Jessica. In truth, Jessica is the feminized version of Jesse. Note the beginning four letters, "Jess" is a clue that both are the same person. A bit quirky I know.

The primary framework of this story is that Jesse is the springboard that began the horror. Note that I described Mr. Johnson as an older man at the beginning. It was a subtle hint that it's the future reality, but you’re not given that tidbit of information until the end of the story. At the conclusion, the reader is brought into the present and Mr. Johnson is described as a young man. He hasn't yet conceived his diabolical plan. It is what Jesse says at the end that manifests the idea in Mr. Johnson's head and puts him on a course of wickedness.

Jessica is an entity that shouldn't exist, yet she played a role in Mr. Johnson’s evolution by persistently scaring the previous tenants which in turn spurred the man’s aggravation with the community. It was also her horror story that prompted Jesse's hasty retreat and prompted him to make statements on his way to the car. Perhaps Jessica devised this diabolical scheme to manufacture her existence. I'll leave that a mystery for the reader to decide.

Mr. Johnson becomes the devil as described and inflicts damage on the community. This is the future reality that will soon exist. Jessica outlines what happens to the community in her tale. Remember Jessica and Jesse are the same. Although Jessica is identified as telling the story, it’s really Jesse terrorizing himself. The story will evolve exactly as told, but it's another unrelated couple that experienced it.

Is Jessica the manifestation of Jesse's imagination or was she brought into existence by an unknown couple that suffered through it in the future? Again, the Mindbender is that Jessica is Jesse. She’s not a figment of imagination or someone else’s creation. She is a product of probability from possible future reality. She is a paradox that put everything in motion.

As for the accelerated transformation, it's a smut piece, I took liberties. I know how the process works, but yeah, I twisted it a bit for the sake of the story. Detailing the long journey required to turn a man into a woman would be slow and boring. It wasn't required for an erotic brainwashing horror bit.

Perhaps I made the story more complex than the average stroke piece. Truly, it is what it is, and I’m satisfied with it. My stories always have a plot, their long, and wordy. I'm trapped by my own style of writing and I'm comfortable with it. People either like my works or they don't, it’s the nature of it for any author. The reason I write is to tell a story and each one I craft is my attempt to improve from the previous. Yeah, I'm not there yet, but I'm working on it. Perhaps I’ll never achieve that goal, but I can say I tried.

LOVED LOVED IT.. l love everything you write.. very pleased you do.. thank you for all your hard work.. well done please keep writing.. l look everyday for something .. all the best

It is like a porn version of The Twilight Zone! Love it!

this was darn good, so many twists and turns, i liked it. fun to read and imagine.

People don't sit around trying to figure out shit.like this on their own. Once he knew they were being brainwashed, he would have grabbed his wife, tied her up and headed for a hospital, while calling the police. A little more time spent on the subtle things would have made this a better story.

I should have read the author's comments before adding mine. I dumped out of the story when the couple's response didn't make sense.

It touched me on different levels.I thought it clever,so many twists and unexpected turns.Well done.