All Comments on 'Pauline'

Perfect in every way.

Great story!

5

A new story from Q! Yay!! Thank you for posting, and look forward to your next. Five stars, of course. Randi.

Great story lots of intrigue

Absolutely beautiful story!

Another lovely story Q. Well done.

Outstanding! I don't think I've ever given one of your stories less than 5*

What a thoroughly enjoyable read. Really liking the references to other characters too.

Surprisingly a few grammar errors which is unlike you.

4 Michelin star restaurant? They don't exist.

Holy smokes!!!

It may well be you best yet!

Very well done. Thank u for sharing with us...

👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

Simply the best you’ve written. Which tells us there is another one in your pen that is even better just waiting to flow to the page. A fan

I could kind of see the train wreck coming but it made it no less sad to read it. Still enjoyed reading, thanks for sharing.

Far too long and far too unrealistic.

Sorry but that was a long way from your best writing.

Dude!!! What a creation you have placed in print. Enjoyied this to the end...

Thank You!!

Nice story. For those looking for "More realism," turn on the News.... Then again, that is more fiction than you can find here. Look forward to your next post. Thanks for sharing.

GREAT!!!

I enjoyed it. Pauline French is one of those characters that draws me in. I’d love to see people abandon the finishing other writer’s stories trend and start writing their own how Pauline French ends up stories.

Wow. You 'got' Pauline. Coincidentally, I just re-read JPB's part of this a week or so ago - you did a fantastic job & I hope that JPB reads this with a smile on his face.

I could see where this was headed - and I understand why - but wow, that hit like a ton of bricks. Jace dealt with it pretty well, though (and I have a feeling that we've seen him in one or another of your stories ...I just can't remember where!)

Your funeral/remembrance scenes are killing me though. It's been a bad year or so, and you're giving me moist eyes pretty regularly with these - please consider that a tribute to your skills at dredging emotions up out of my black little heart.

Again, congratulations on a story well told - and thank you for sharing your talents with us.

Thank you for a lovely story. You never disappoint, me anyway. Thank you. I look forward to your next offering.

Pauline was abusive. The ear biting wasn’t cute, it was assault.

A well written story but I'm sitting here very sad. As good as it was I wish I hadn't read it.

Thoroughly enjoyable.

Thanks for your effort.

Cheers, EmmSea...

I enjoyed the story very much but better yet it in a way brought together three of my all time writers. Bob has been my go to story teller for years, Randi can bring tears to my eyes without even trying and Q - you amaze me. The sad thing was to so many of us, Pauline was almost as real an ex wife.

somewhere east of Omaha

You don't golf. You play golf.

Thank you for writing this. Very enjoyable.

Really well written like all of your stories but was underwhelming the last 2 to 3 pages. I was wondering if he was switched out with another person at that point. Everyone from the beginning told him exactly how Pauline was, they didnt even try to veil what they thought how it would end. He himself was even aware of her nature up to that point. Why was he surprised?

It's weird when a tale makes you read it all the way to the end, when you're pretty sure you know what's going to happen by page 2. I enjoyed it, even if it had a bit too much of the James Bond superhero vibe running through it all the way. Why do all the 'good guys' have to turn out to be over the top?

Borrowed from multiple authors and themes, but this isn't Bob's Pauline. Some of the references to other authors and their works is quite subtle, but I got them because I've been reading these so long.

BTW, was the painter ending an allusion to Saddletramps works? Only one I'm not sure of.

This poor man!

Erudite, chased by businessmen and women, riding a custom made car, sleeping with supermodels, able to drop $150,000 A MONTH without pause (more than 97% of Americans make a year)

Yes, this touched me, that he was able to marry and bang a hot woman for a year and remain emotionally and fiscally be untouched.

His plight moved me viscerally.

Could he send me $150,000 next month?

Great writing. Possibly a bit long. Saying that I had an enjoyable 40 minutes.

It's a swing and a hit. It's going to be a long one folks. Out of the park, homerun. -starsong

A new, and excellent, story from one of the grand masters of this genre.

Ok, I am just going to come out and say I loved the story. You did a masterful job of giving detail, but not to much detail and it just kept getting better. JPB should be happy with how you characterized Pauline, (I know I was). I will state that it was tremendously well written and a great homage to JPB and one of “his” characters!

I always enjoy your stories and this one was no exception. Great tribute to JPB and Iiked the way you snuck one of GA's recent character at the front end with the charities. There were a few typo/editing errors in the first page or so, but everything else was sound as usual. Thanks for allowing me to share your universe for a bit. 5*

WOW !!!

I do not know what to say. What talent. 5 ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Huge ! Your story has achieved two things:

1) keep going and looking forward to reading page after page.

For a while, I even hoped that Karma had turned for poor Pauline thanks to Jason.

This could give rise to a beautiful story, that of a woman with a very bad romantic history but who finds a man who manages to believe in them despite the warnings and disapproval of those around them.

I am not usually very lenient but I come to pity Pauline a lot for the sad life she had.

2) you only made people smile throughout the story with the character of Jason.

The perfect man, who knows how to do everything better than anyone. On each page, I wondered: but what will he do next ???

It made me think of the ideal man:

My name is Halston, Jason Halston. I have license to fuck you.😂

Thank you very much for sharing your immense talent

Masterful story telling. High society, James Bond and the beautiful people all wrapped up in a nice bow. You, Sir, really know how to spin a yarn. Thanks for the effort. One further comment. I've read JPB's stories forever. He's both good and horrible, writing some of my favorite stories on Literotica and then turning around and leaving us hanging for the umpteenth time. He has a marvelous imagination. That said, the very best line in this story was "No nicknames, no titles, just plain Bob". That line alone was worth the price of admission! Thanks again for the great read.

A terrific story by an excellent writer.

Let me put it this way - this story was so good that it's my first ever comment on a story on this site. I've been a lurker for years now and I've always liked your stories - you're one of the authors I routinely "read". This story, with it's so over-the-top good guy was just simply a lot of fun, but you had to know an epic train wreck was coming and it did. I'm sure I'll reread it again and again as the ride is just that good. Thank you for the smile on my face and tear in my eye - all at the same time!

Very well, I'm going to be the contrarian. In a very technical sense, this was well written, but this author's stories always are. There were a very few odd pratfalls, e.g. "Dad must pay you pretty good." and a reference to "a water". Such highly educated characters would know how to use "good" and "well", and they certainly would know the difference between a count term and a mass term (can you imagine one of them asking for "a bread" or "a gravy"?).

The real problem with the story, however, is with the lazy character development and the plot cliches. "Halston" is not only written as a prissy, precious, improbably gifted male, he is developed as the high society analogue of the stock Seal/special forces/ computer ninja MC character who appears regularly in LW stories. "Pauline" and "Marta" are also stock LW characters representing narcissistic dysfunction and feminine virtue, respectively. Just the character development telegraphed to the trajectory of the plot by the end of the first or, at the latest, second page. The plot itself is also a shopworn LW standard. Stock characters and a hackneyed plot result in a boring story, and this was boring. The occasional eruptions of virtue signaling were also annoying. This writer normally writes exceptionally well, but this story was far too formulaic to be interesting.

Just masterful. I loved the story. It was engaging funny and tragic. Amazing.

JPB should love how you portrayed his character. This was another brilliant effort by a true master.

Five stars only because I can't give you more.

Hooked

Wow, just wow.... An excellent tribute to JPB and a very good story all round. After a long spell of meh tales in LW, qhml1 and Todd172 have given us the two best stories of the year so far ON THE SAME DAY. Thank you for all the enjoyment you have given me over time reading what you create and I hope to experience more in the future.

Anon, the painter is from an earlier Q story: Sissoban O'Mallory. The protagonist in that one is famous for his painting - the story goes to great detail about that painting, among others that he does.

Very well done Q! Your stories all seem to flow so well. This one was particularly, excellent, great prose and plots that suck you in and make you feel you are in the story. 5 stars all the way!

Eton College is a boy's boarding school for schoolboys, not college graduates, it's not in London, and you write your own CV, it's short for 'curriculum vitae' which is your employment history; i.e resume. Private boarding schools like Eton College don't have anything to do with your employment history, that's post graduating from university after you leave school and actually go to university. If you're going to claim an English heritage at least look us up and check us out a little...

Damn.

Another great tale has been going gifted us.

Pauline, JPB and qhml1 all together! This is what happens when legends collide. This was super entertaining. Thanks for teaming up with JPB. You are two of the best on Literotica, now or ever! Thanks!

Sorry qhml1, but I couldn't even finish it.

~

I had 3 attempts to get into the story but after the third attempt I got as far as the end of page 4 and gave up. Perhaps I'll check it out later but I doubt it. This is not my usual reaction to a qhml story so I'd better explain why.

~

The main reason is the lack of emotion or even mild tension, but there are others. For example, you painted your protagonist as a man of the world who speaks three and a bit languages, has supermodels for friends and moves in exotic, wealthy circles. Very James Bond-ish but despite his so-called superior knowledge of the female sex he seems to go along with the toxic Ms French. And as for Ms Frenchie, what a presumptuous bitch she is. And what's with the lunging for his ear when she's pissed off? She's portrayed as a narcissistic womble who feeds on stupid men (or on their ears, at least), and the trouble is that your protagonist seems happy to go along with it, while at the same time smugly denying anything could possibly happen (DANGER Will Smith!!!)

~

Marta is the alternative character. A mother-figure with humble beginnings who is obviously meant to be everything that Ms French is not, and while we can all see it by page 4 it seems the protagonist hasn't quite got with the program yet. I did eventually cheat and head to the last page, and sure enough, he ends up with Marta but only after he married the toxic Frenchie womble. Very boilerplate. I don't score stories that I don't finish and this is no exception, but I felt I owed this author feedback on why I couldn't finish it.

You need to find a better editor, too many mistakes were missed, or perhaps created during the editing process. Spelling mistakes that could have been caught by spellcheck, a few words missing here and there. A couple of errors were bad enough they pulled me from the story trying to make sense of them. For instance:

"... Marta has that ageless beauty that defies time, looking as hot at 54 than she was at 34."

It's a really good story and I'm happy you submitted it. 5 stars, even with the editing problems.

QHML1, you've done it again! Another terrific story. Great characters, great storyline, entertaining as hell! Thanks for these 9 pages! I'm looking forward to your next submission!

Consistent with JPB's character and appropriately poignant. Thank you Q!

Hmmm. Maybe a little predictable but far too well written to give anything but full marks.

Thank you.

What the heck!!! Who is JPB going to use as the fall girl in his stories from now on??? An absolutely wonderful and thought out story by one of my Top 5 authors on this webpage. I was so happy to see something new from you today. Please note JPB, I do feel for Pauline. Grouch6977

I think the author meant " following the tenet of Payback is a bitch' instead of " following the tenant of payback being a bitch" in Ch.2 or Ch. 3

I've never mentioned that Paulie was a runner. She was on the track team in high school.

Really good story.

Lovely story, sir. It's always a pleasure to read your work. Thank you for sharing your talent.

.

If anyone is interested, QHML1 has a Patreon page where he posts stories. Shoot me an email if you're interested and I'll get you the link.

.

When I grow up, I want to have his skill as a storyteller.

Rob was ‘one of the richest men in the state’, but couldn’t afford the rates at a trout fishing resort? Just so over the top in every respect.

Good grief how boring. The main character is a pompous prick. The supermodels added nothing to the story. Your editors did you no favors. This was way too long.

Carmella, besides being drop dead gorgeous and worth millions, also held a Master's in Psychology.

A good editor would have pointed out the need for 6 years of schooling to achieve this. If she is full time model when would the schooling have occurred? Kinda impossible. If she wanted to see patients she would need around a thousand hours of supervised client hours, then take a licensing test.

Great job, as you may already ignore the negatives. I find it interesting that the anonymous complain, maybe they should give it a shot. I, sir do not have that gift but I enjoy your work - keep it up....

Whoa. This Pauline was just nasty, reckless and stupid. As written, she clearly must have wanted to get caught. Employees. Customers. Discussing her cheating plans with others. And she was such a clear-eyed, thoughtful cheat. No excuses. Just cheating for the sheer, ugly, traitorous hell of it.

And hubby just doesn't make any sense. He is superman, James Bond and rich. Yet he takes a middle level manager job?! And he falls for and marries the bitch from hell?! Without any explanation as to why he would or should? Whose bitchiness is not only telegraphed by her own behavior, but reinforced by every other person who has ever known her? The story simply doesn't give us any reason why he would marry her.

Always worth reading your stuff. This one just didn't quite get there. He was too perfect. She was too awful and nasty. Just didn't really sell me on the why of the marriage.

I never tire of reading your stories. Well thought out and well written, you seem to catch the essence of each person you write. Thank you for all the hard work and the great stories.

l was entertained, thank you.

Outstanding! Good storytelling, and the ‘over the top’ parts got funnier with each new one.

Way too sad...

Well...

The story may have been called “Pauline” but, it should have been named “Jason - Mans man, God’s gift to women and all around good guy”

One of the best LW stories I have read on this site.

Cheers

SAGE

MB make Jaguar???

Lots of silly mistakes that got a bit annoying, story line is good but too stiff and nothing really flowed.

First time I've not thoroughly enjoyed one of your stories, new editor required.

Q, This story, at least to me was absolutely, wonderfully great!!! My thanks to you for your melding together JPB, and his always troublesome girl Pauline into a nice tale of friendships, love, romance and unfortunately some sadness at the end.

In my opinion VERY WELL DONE!! Thanks again I really thoroughly enjoyed the read and consider the time well spent.

I labored through 4 pages and that is all I could handle. Not a JPB kind of thing. TWO**

So, I'm guessing he also shits gold, pisses Dom and finds caviar his nose. Not your best, the ending was telegraphed at the start and the MC was a self indulged boor. Knew what she was like, was even warned off by her dad and others and still went for it? Money and association don't make the man (or the woman). Writing as good as ever, just didn't like it. Thanks for the effort.

Couldn't finish the first page! Randi's editing is as bad as her writing! I gave up when I got to the below error you BOTH should have seen:

"she was chosen for her imitative and drive"

I'm sure you meant INITIATIVE not imitative. Long winded with far too much information that wasn't needed, a true JPB tribute would have been a one or two page unfinished story. He is the KING of unfinished stories.

5 for you and I am not on the third page yet. You have got to be the best writer I have ever had the pleasure of reading in many decades (more than 65 years). I started laughing out loud in the second page and never stopped until the end. Please write more stories and I don't even care what the subject matter it about.

An excellent, super-fun read.

THANKS

5 shining stars from me! Hell of a story qhml1. Thanks.

No talent but envy, no creativity, unable to do anything but nit pick ,and they are not sure what nits look like.

They count for naught and are not to be taken seriously, by in large.

Your stories are a gift.

We didn't pay for your time,

it's appreciated, thank you.

The guy was very confident around women and even bragged about having bedded twins... so I just don't understand why he would ever get married to Pauline.

1) She had a high body count, which means she'd struggle with monogamy.

2) She had no morals and happily had affairs with married men.

3) She repeatedly cheated on multiple boyfriends/fiances without remorse.

Each of those are huge red flags. Any guy who knows anything about women wouldn't even start a relationship with a woman like that, let alone marry her! It was hard to feel any sympathy for the protagonist when he willingly got involved with such an entitled slut.

Disappointing. Stock characters, stock plot, limited emotional impact, didn't do justice to Pauline French, borderline boring. Skipped to end after 3 pages.

So glad to be able to enjoy your fine writing again!

So worldly. So much development!

Thanks, a whole bunch!

Loved the story. I've always felt a little sorry for Pauline in most of JPB's tales and hopped she might get a happy ending here. Ah well, perhaps another day. Thanks for sharing your work with us.

There are many like yourself who enjoy JPB's writing and characters, but I am not one of them. I stuck it out, hoping this time at least, when somebody else was writing the story, that things would work out. And they didn't. Again. Just like every one of JPB's stories i have ever tried, there were unlikeable people doing unlikeable things (Pauline, in this one. Again.). YOUR characters I liked, but hanging the story on JPB's characters, well, fuck me running, with a chaionsaw, I had such hopes. Meh. At least it was free.

TIME AFTER TIME....QHML1 is the BEST active writer here in the LW genre

Touching story.

Why was Pauline so seriously flawed? I never quite understood. Heartbreaking, to the end.

The story took forever to get interesting, but then it rocked.

@Bebop3, we all want to have QHML1's writing skills when we grow up!

I really, really, really liked Jason. All the women around him were playing typical women games and he handled them all with astonishing ability and calm. Is he a to-good-to-be-true character? Possibly, but he was a lot of fun to read.

Why did such a brilliant and capable man get married to Pauline? Because he loved her. He took great pains to shake her out of her bad habits but in the end, she was too broken to be faithful. His ability to transcend his concerns about her to marry her was an amazing accomplishment and gift to her. Pauline, being Pauline, was not capable of honoring the gift. We KNOW Pauline. We knew where this was probably going.

No, there was no high emotion or drama. Situations were handled. Pain was felt but mostly moved on from. But the characters, even the super models, were interesting and fun. Was Jason a bit to James Bond over the top? Sure, but many people LOVE to read and watch James Bond. I smiled every time Jason "outwitted" the "supervillain" women he encountered. OK, maybe the story isn't everyone's cup of British tea. But, can I have another please?

Excellent story Q! Truly enjoyed it.

Killian

There were conversations where I could not tell who was saying what to the other person.

The protagonist was too perfect, always knowing what to do, always keeping his cool, and always rolling in money. This story was not, in my opinion, one of your better ones.

Excellent story. However Pauline French and for that matter many of the females featured in JPBs tales are the unseen dates of Deputy Barney Fife on the Andy Griffith Show.

"I commented on the dish we were having, saying that it was very good but there was a little bistro on the smaller streets of Milan that was even better."

Ha, what an insufferable hipster. But seriously, very well-written story about a tragic character. The protagonist was a little too perfect, which made the early part of the story an exercise in one-upmanship and bragging, but it improved in the second part. The initial wooing period does seem overlong (compared to the cheating and breakup which is rushed through), but since it also develops the relationship with Rob and Monica, it's justifiable. Nitpicking aside, great stuff.

Q you're a master story teller.... What is unique in your writing is it may be a long story but it's never boring and rarely predictable, it moves along. So many long stories over-write and you end up skipping paragraphs of minutia to keep the story moving and flowing - but not so with yours.

/

As a famous quote goes, you have "talent on loan from god."

/

6*, Hooyah, salutes...

Nice. Maybe someday in another story, Pauline will be happy.

Welcome Back... Missed well written story for a long time. Hoping we don't have to wait this long for your next/

I think your idea of honoring JPB for his prolific career as LW writer was thoughtful and well-deserved. Of course, your story concerning Pauline French's life was very engaging, well-written, and interesting. You are without any doubt one of the best contemporary writers in the LW category of the site. I thank you for the story, the time and the the effort placed in writing it, but above all; please, keep writing!

Excellent, but I thought the original Pauline lived in Louisiana.

I'll probably run out of superlatives to describe this one. Superb writing a great tale of Pauline, I'm sure JPB will be proud of what you did with her. Only odd thing he drives a Jaguar so I'm not sure what Mercedes deputy had to do with it, Jaguar was sold to the Indian Tata company by Ford years ago...doesn't really matter it's just a great story. Thank you qhml1

Great read..I must admit I didnt take with Jason at first. He was a little too perfect for my liking,( a little haterade in me i guess), but reading along I began to empathize with the character. Just like everyone else in this world that goes through the vicissitudes of life, heartaches and adversities does not necessarily respect the old, or young, the beautiful or sublimes, the rich or the poor. As the great Bill Burr once said "We are all eating a giant shit sandwich out here, and nobody cares"

Brilliant

No one went to Village Inn! J/k. Nicely done.

A 🎇✨

Loved it.