Penny and Leonard Get Together

"You know they're Sheldon's and they are really difficult to find in adult sizes."

"OK, so what are you wearing right now?" Thinking quickly, he replies.

"Boxers."

"Really? What colour?"

"Erm! Navy blue."

"Sounds good. When did that happen? I've seen all your laundry."

"Just recently."

"Prove it!" Leonard is trapped.

"I'm not just going to drop my pants for you! Just because you flashed your bra at me doesn't mean it's worth me showing you my underwear."

"So it's just the price we're haggling over?" He starts to disagree but Penny continues. "How about you show me your new shorts and you can choose a piece of underwear from that basket and I'll model it for you?" He's wavering. "I promise it's not a trick, I'll even go first." She thinks she's cut off his last line of objection and seals the deal by crossing her legs, reminding him she's only wearing her thin silk robe.

Taking his silence for agreement she grabs her laundry and drops it on his lap. As if by themselves, his hands move over the lingerie. On top are half a dozen sexy bras, a little more revealing than what he's already seen.

"You really wear this?" He queries holding up a thong. Lace, string and transparent cloth.

"For the right person, just not for very long. Is that what you want me to wear?" He looks panicked.

"Sorry, it's just like the first time I went to a sundae bar which had non-dairy ice cream." He clutches the thong and rummages urgently through the rest.

"Why don't we just go with your first choice?" She takes the thong, her wine and the laundry basket and heads to her bedroom. Unsure and feeling out of his depth he awkwardly perches on the back of the couch.

In her room Penny gazes thoughtfully at the flimsy underwear. She'd not intended to go this far. She'd only intended to tease him a little. Seeing the underwear, she'd meant to put away, just made this idea pop into her head. But wasn't about to back out now. As she slips one foot into the tiny underwear she wobbles and realises how much she's had to drink and realises she'll have to be careful. Not just in adjusting the material to cover as much of her waxed pussy as possible, but the buzz from the wine and tingle of excitement from doing this, had often led to doing things she regretted later.

A few minutes later she returns in the robe. Leonard straightens and unconsciously gathers his hands over his crotch as she poses in the doorway.

"Ready sweetie?" Stepping closer and grasping the hem of the robe. Pausing to bask in the combined look of fear this is still just a prank and the hope it isn't. After several long heart beats she takes pity and raises the hem slowly to her waist.

"Like what you see?" Pirouetting slowly before dropping the robe. "Your turn."

"Erm!" Is all he can manage.

"Come on. I fulfilled my part of the agreement. Are you really going to back out?"

"I lied OK?" He blurts out. "I'm wearing tighty whities."

"Oh! That's naughty Leonard. Lying to me. I think I should make you drop your trousers now as punishment. Do you think women like being lied to?"

"No! It's just..." He moves his hands for a moment to show his erection and blushes furiously.

"Hey sweetie that's OK. It's not like I never saw one before. And it looks like you have nothing to be ashamed of." Lifting the robe again. "I want you to look. I'd be disappointed if, when I'm dressed like this, you didn't react like that." She nods towards his crotch. "Come on Leonard, if you show me, you'll get a bonus." She finishes playfully. After a few moments of indecision, he might not know what's going on here, but he unzips his pants and they drop to his ankles. He refuses to look at her. "See that is not so bad?" 'I can't call him little Lenny ever again' She adds to herself. "Now for your bonus!" She slips off the robe completely. The half cup bra matches the thong and barely hides her areolas. Always proud of her flawless body and firm breasts, she's never been shy about showing off. The thrill of power she feels when she has a guy mesmerised by her body is as good as sex. Well almost! She corrects herself.

"Let's sit on the couch." Brushing past him, she struggles not to reach out to touch his bulge. She sits and he comes around the couch shaking his head.

"I'm not complaining, but I don't really know what's going on here." Taking his courage in both hands he gestures to his crotch. "My blood flow's so diverted right now, so I'm struggling to understand what is going on."

"That's part of the lesson. I reckon with you like that, you'll be thinking more like a normal guy, and a normal guy spends much of his first date thinking of what his date looks like naked." She casually puts her arms out along the back of her couch, framing her near nudity. "Now you don't have to wonder too hard."

"Thank you!" He mumbles with his eyes roaming all over her body.

"The second part is to desensitize you to this." She gestures to her body and watches as his eyes takes in every inch of her body. Hardly blinking lest he miss a moment. She looks down, seeing just how exposed she is and crosses her legs. She doesn't want to let on just how turned on she is right now.

"That may take a while." He replies honestly.

"That's OK, think of it like this. Remember what they say about being nervous when you have to speak in public. You're supposed to imagine the other people in their underwear. This way you don't need to use your imagination."

"So what do we do? Just sit here looking at each other?" He asks looking at her face for the first time.

"I think we can talk about the things we both enjoyed growing up. Childhood haunts, favourite game, whatever. Until 'not so little Leonard' goes away."

So they reminisce about the hide-outs, imaginary friends and favourite things. Slowly he starts to relax and loosen up. Their shared laughter defuses the sexual tension and after an hour it seems they both have forgotten their state of undress. Penny finally notices his erection has gone down.

"See I knew it would work. Admittedly I didn't think it would take quite so long." She emphasises the word 'long'. "I think that's enough for today. We can get dressed now." With far less embarrassment Leonard retrieves his pants and starts to put them on.

"You know, as strange as this is, I think it worked." He looks up to see her bent over picking up her robe. Her backside is naked, except for a couple of thin strings. Her pussy lips bulge around the side of the insignificant pouch meant to contain it. He stammers slightly as he quickly zips up before his erection returns. "You know we've never really talked like that before. I don't mean the nudity thing. Just chatting about our lives. It was nice, bizarre but nice." Penny slips on the robe and turns to him.

"Yeah it was nice. You know it's the first time I've worn this underwear and it's not been torn off in less than five minutes."

"Don't imagine I didn't think about it!" He replies grinning.

"Who says I'd have stopped you!" She puts her arms over his shoulders and gives him a kiss. Pressing a hip against him and feeling his erection. "Next week I want us to try a simulated date, and don't forget, I will be testing you on the sports and celebrity gossip."

After he leaves she leans with her back against the door. She was a little confused by this. Dressed as she was, and with the wine she'd consumed, her body was all geared up for action and now she was finding herself drawn to Leonard. She'd never talked to a guy that long about her live, where he wasn't only doing it to sleep with her.

Scene: The landing between the apartments. Leonard is wearing his new grown up clothes and carrying wine and flowers. He knocks on Penny's door and she opens it and waives him in.

"Still no power?" He asks handing her the flowers.

"I was going for the ambience this time. Is that wine for us?" Leonard nods and takes the offered seat at Penny's dinner table. "OK I've a couple of ideas, some things I learned from my acting classes, the ones you think so little of. I think we should role play a proper date and we can pause by holding this fluffy bunny if we want to comment or ask questions. OK? Let's start with a meal and then a movie. I'll open the wine and quiz you on your homework while we eat the pizza." She pours the wine and slips into character.

"So Leonard, or is it Lenny?"

"Leonard please. Penelope isn't it?"

"Just Penny. What made you decide to meet at this restaurant?" Leonard, thinking quickly replies.

"Well it's really convenient to the cinema." He nods to the couch a couple of feet away. "And I don't know if you're vegetarian or anything. So this pizzeria does meat free, gluten free and lactose free pizza." Penny smiles at his improvisation.

"So what do you do for a living?"

"I'm a scientist."

"Oh that sounds exciting. Is it a 'cure cancer' kind, or stroking a white cat whilst laughing manically?"

"Well, I'm allergic to cats, but you might say I'm closer to the latter, but only because I work with weapons grade lasers. I suppose I might be able to cure cancer, if it was big enough to target from more than a mile away. So what do you do?"

"I'm a..." she is about to say actress, then she corrects herself. "Yoga instructor."

"Wow that must make you very flexible?"

"If this date works out you may get to find out how flexible." She smirks as she pops a slice of salami into her mouth. "Do you work out much?"

"Not as much as I'd like to. You know, pressure of work, but I'm pretty active with sports. Boxing, horse racing, skiing and archery. Pretty much anything you can get for the Wii." he says nonchalantly and Penny laughs.

They chat back and forth, staying in character, until the pizza is finished.

"So what movie do you want to watch?" She asks.

"I think this cinema has a rather limited choice." He glances at the powerless TV. "There is an interesting documentary about building a hydroelectric dam in the Amazon, but its lady's choice tonight."

As they sit on the couch she hands Leonard an empty popcorn bucket and jumbo drinks cup.

"Are you sure you don't want anything?" he asks.

"No, I have to watch my figure."

"Well it is a figure worth watching."

"Besides, I'm sure you'll share?"

"Of course. Help yourself." She moves her hand towards the imaginary popcorn then stops.

"Wait you haven't done the popcorn trick have you?"

"What popcorn trick?"

"The guy pokes a hole in the base and puts his cock through. Then I get a surprise. I doubt if you'd ever do something like that! However, if you ever do, make sure it's butter and not salt on the popcorn."

"In case it stings?"

"No, butter is a better lubricant. And besides it is nicer to lick off later." Penny enjoys the look of surprise on Leonard's face.

She holds up bunny to signify she's out of character.

"OK Leonard, make your move."

"Move? What move?"

"Come on every guy has a move." she resumes their role play.

For several seconds Leonard wracks his brains then settles on the only one he can think of from TV shows. He yawns, stretches his arms above his head and as he lowers them one goes over Penny's shoulder. He's quite pleased with this until Penny grabs the bunny.

"Stop right there! The yawn, stretch and arm over the shoulder."

"I knew you'd hate it."

"Let's break it down like a nerdy scientist. First yawning makes it seem like she is boring. Second you have to be really sure of your deodorant. And lastly, it's so old it was a cliché in my grandfather's day."

"So? It's tried and tested."

"No it's tried and died. I reckon it was done at the first movie ever shown and should have stopped then. What is your ultimate goal?"

"A little physical contact?"

"That's just crap! The goal is to cop a feel and unless you have gorilla arms or your date is a midget it won't work. Here I'll show you." Grabbing his arm and hooking it over her shoulder. "See? Your elbow doesn't even reach the middle of my neck. Your hand is more likely to poke the next person in the ear than to get near me. I have to move like this for it to work." Twisting and turning until her head is over Leonard's heart. She grabs his wrist pulling it down towards her bust. Without realising her blouse is gaping open in this position. His hand slips inside and cups her naked breast.

They both freeze at the contact. This wasn't what she planned for tonight. However, it's rather pleasant. She just wishes she could see the expression on his face. 'Mind you?' She thinks. 'The view from here isn't bad.' The movement had dislodged the popcorn container and it had slipped off his lap. Exposing the bulge in his pants. His soft warm hands and gentle touch is quite different to most of the men she's been with. He isn't pawing or tugging, just a very soft and gentle squeeze and release.

"Have you changed your aftershave?" She asks trying to prolong the contact a few moments more.

"Yes, it's one you bought me for Christmas." Leonard replies in a croaky voice.

"It's nice; you should wear it more often." With that she sits back up and, reluctantly for both of them, he pulls his hand free. They're both a little flushed. With a smirk she watches him try nonchalantly to slide the popcorn container back over his bulge.

Penny picks up the bunny again. "Let's try a recap. You were doing really well until I wanted you to do the 'move'. You were witty and self-depreciating over dinner. Perhaps a little too forthcoming with your allergies. As for the cinema, just try whispering a witty comment occasionally. Try squeezing her hand a little at a romantic bit. Just don't hang on like grim death until they get clammy."

"Right, right, I think I can remember that." Penny glances down at his crotch again and he blushes.

"Come on sweetie. You have nothing to be embarrassed about." Her eyes linger a few moments more than intended. "What I mean is, you got to second base so it's perfectly normal..." Nodding toward his erection. Struggling, she tries to get back on track. "I've come out of so many movie theatres looking like Quasimodo because some guy didn't understand how uncomfortable it was, it's not funny."

Leonard can't help smiling at that image and she's struck how cute he is. In a non-traditional way. Feeling confused again, he's not her usual type. He's not tall, ripped and good looking. Then an errant voice pipes up. That's why you like him. He's genuine, adores you and totally reliable. To cover her confusion, she stands. "Ok, let's call it a night." Leonard stands obediently. "Wait! Are you going to end the date without a kiss?"

He might be confused with Penny's sudden change in gears, but he isn't going to give up the chance to kiss her. "OK, here's what I want you to do..." She starts

"It's OK I've got this." Stepping up and running one hand up the back of her head. Slipping his fingers into her hair. The other hand cups her cheek and tilts her face slightly as his lips meet hers. Penny's eyes widen in shock, and then close in pleasure, from a shockingly good kiss. Possibly one of best kisses she's ever had.

"Where did you learn to do that?"

"The internet. Just don't ask me how I practised."

"Erm, I don't think I can give you any advice on kissing." As they part she looks down to see the bulge in his pants and her hand starts to reflexively reach for his erection. However, she manages to pull it back before she touches it. If she does, she knows where it will end up. "Good night Leonard."

Leonard stands on the landing as the door closes and then breaks out in a grin. This may be as confusing as hell, but he's finally kissed Penny and got to second base. Fake date or not he's going to count it. In his apartment Leonard throws himself down on the couch and covers his crotch with a cushion. Next to him, Sheldon is working on his laptop.

"Have you been out?" Sheldon asks, not looking up.

"I was over at Penny's and it was, well ... amazing. Confusing, but amazing."

"Don't care."

Back in Penny's apartment she reaches for the wine, but stops. It isn't going to solve her current confusion. If she's honest with herself, she's twisting her plan to help a friend. Originally it was to build his confidence and improve his wardrobe. Now the lure of teasing yet another guy was derailing that. It's only because it's Leonard, that he's not just jumped her bones. If only he wasn't... If only he didn't... Who's she trying to kid? Stripping to virtually nothing on the lame excuse of checking out what underwear he's wearing was entirely her idea. Pulling his hand onto her breast. All her. If she'd not stopped when he left and actually touched his cock? She'd have dropped to her knees, yanked it out and given him her best blow job before dragging him to bed. Hell! If he'd have kissed her again she'd have dragged him to bed. Perhaps she should try to find a way to either cool this down or...

Scene: Leonard and Sheldon's apartment. Sheldon is staring at his white board in the middle of the room while Leonard is making a cup of tea. His phone rings.

"Hey Penny, want me to come over?"

"Can we give it a rain check? I pulled a muscle in the small of my back. I was gonna get a massage at the studio, but the woman wasn't in today."

"I could give you a massage if you want?"

"I don't know if that's a good idea. Every massage I've ever had from a guy is just a prelude to sex. A quick rub of the shoulders, a squeeze of the butt and straight to the boobs. You can guess where it goes from there?"

"You know you can trust me" 'True.' She thinks. 'But can I trust myself?'

"I'm not sure Leonard..."

"Remember the kiss last week? I've spent even longer researching massage. When I was a kid I gave my mother neck massages and it's about the only thing I ever got a compliment from her for!"

"OK, OK you sold me. Give me ten minutes to shower and come on over."

"Good, I'll get my massage kit. See Ya!" He hangs up and looks over to Sheldon. "I suppose you heard all that?"

"Yes, but you have the advantage. I still don't care."

Scene: Penny's bedroom. Leonard places towels over the bed and has a lotion bottle warming in a bowl of hot water. Penny walks into the room in her white robe.

"I'm really not sure about this Leonard."

"If you really don't want this, then fine, but it benefits both of us. You get some relief from your painful back and I finally get a chance to justify putting this kit together." He gestures to the pocketed belt he's wearing. Penny picks up the lotion from its warming pot.

"Ooh pricey. OK let's do it before I change my mind. How do you want me?"

"I was thinking face down with your head to the bottom of the bed. Should I step out of the room while you lay down?"

"No that's OK sweetie, you've already seen me in this underwear." She slips off her robe to reveal the same underwear from last time. His eyes light up and he can feel a stirring in his pants. "Now it's just a massage and that's all. If I say stop, then we stop OK?" He nods as she lies down.

Leonard kneels at the end of the bed and starts massaging her scalp and neck, then from her fingers up to her shoulders. Without asking he pops open the back of her bra and slips the straps aside. Penny suppresses a shiver of excitement at this 'take charge' Leonard. Taking his time, he works out knots in muscles she never knew she had. Reaching the bottom of her rib cage, she lifts her head.

"Wait a moment, if I'm in my underwear you should be too."

"I'm not sure if that's how it works at a massage parlour, but OK." As Leonard slips off his t-shirt and pants. He might not have the muscles of her usual type of guy, but he's not bad. A little exercise to tone up and... 'Whoa, this teasing is backfiring' she thinks. She's losing the control she normally has when she teases. And surprisingly she's happy about it. She tugs the bra out from under her and tosses it across the room.