Pharaoh Ch. 27

Finally, someone has to interrupt. Thankfully it was Briana and not me.

"Ms. Mogumbo! This all sounds crazy. How do you know? Where are you getting all this?"

"I can only tell you some of it. I have two main sources. The one from Caswell I can't reveal. Maybe the only honest guy who works there, pretty high up and he's seen everything. Flo's financial statements — she was forced into giving them. He knows she's in deep-doodoo financially. Has shown me the Caswell documents that spew out after the announcement of the White Girl competition, documents that show how Flo leveraged WGPD to get their executives back to the negotiating table, that show how effective she was, that show everything up to the letter of agreement in September. I wish I'd known some of it as it was happening, but I didn't. He told me everything after I got fired for the four point story, right after Alicia won Pharaoh."

We nod.

"You'll just have to trust me on this, cause no way am I revealing his identity, they'd crucify him."

"OK, go on," says Stony.

"But the stuff, the comedy of errors stuff, about the voting and the counting and the lying about the four points? That source is Judy Wexner. She's given me the whole thing in detail, including paper evidence from that night to back up her claims."

That didn't make any sense to me. I asked, "Wexner? Why would she do that? I mean it incriminates her too."

Ms. Mogumbo looked at us all and said, "I know. It's a sad story. It all comes back to what they did, the bastards, to Roberta O'Leary. See, Judy and I have been friends since grade school. There was a time around 2nd grade when everyone called us the two-Judies, we were so close. It was fine for us to be friends as kids. But she's upper so by high school her family made her drop me. But we're still friendly when we run into one another, still have a drink together off and on. Anyway, the night of White Girl they slam Roberta into the nut-house as a kind of protection, get her out of the public eye. It's just another stupid mistake on their part, on Flo's part. I mean it's not like Roberta knew about the cheating, right? She absolutely didn't. It's true she felt something wrong had happened, but she didn't know what and certainly had no evidence of anything. In the end she was like everyone else, blamed herself for the scrunchy penalty."

Judy Mogumbo took a long deep breath. The story was affecting her.

"But Judy Wexner has a heart, always has. She's devastated by the thought of what she did to Roberta, that Roberta is being held prisoner because of her lies. That's when she first contacted me, a few days after White Girl Pride Day. She'd had a few drinks and she was sobbing, telling me how bad she felt for Roberta. I didn't make much of it. We all felt bad for that poor girl. I figured it affected Judy even more cause she was one of the voters. It wasn't until Alicia won Pharaoh and Judy heard they readmitted Roberta and her husband that she totally broke. She calls again right after that, drunk again, and begins hinting something wasn't right with the four points. Wouldn't say much, just a bunch of hints about it being an error. I could tell she knew more than what she was saying. Hell, she was practically begging me to know there was more."

Briana interrupted her, "Damn! that's when you wrote..."

Mogumbo continued, "I wrote that article, the one that got me fired. Which, you know, that really was stupid. Cause I had no way to follow up on what she was saying. Suddenly Judy won't answer my calls. I didn't know what to do but I made it a priority to talk with Roberta the day she got out, asked her about the penalty. I was careful not to give anything away. She obviously didn't have any idea about the cheating. How could she? But that schmuck Murdoch really did believe it was her, that Roberta was the source of my story. You'd have to meet this guy, he's an idiot. One of those upper morons who got all his breaks from Daddy."

Briana says, "I know the motherfucker. Dray's had him over, but Dray thinks he's a moron too."

"Yeah. So then I'm unemployed and start thinking I can do an independent piece on the Caswell deal with the Barrens. That leads to my first source and I get really into it. Two weeks after that Judy finally calls again, and again she's had more than a few drinks. She's plastered. I couldn't even follow what she was saying. But by the next day she had sobered up and told me the whole thing over lunch in my apartment. She's absolutely devastated at what happened. She's a little better right now but back then I think she really was having some sort of breakdown. It was really sad. Like I said, Judy has a heart. She is so ashamed of what she did. She spilled everything."

Stony said, "Damn."

Bri says, "Sweet Frederick! That poor girl. I mean both of them. Roberta of course, but Wexner too."

I said, "Still doesn't explain why she'd want you to tell us, to tell me."

Ms. Mogumbo said, "Yeah. That's interesting. The fact is she feels guilty towards you too Jeff."

"Me? Why me?"

"Because twice she had the chance to save you from Alicia's crazy ambition to be with Pharaoh. She watched Alicia the whole way through and was convinced she was going nuts. Remember it was Judy Wexner who was the girl's chaperone on the tour, saw first hand what Alicia was turning into. That's when the guilt started. She could have saved Alicia from it, and you from it, twice. First when she sold her vote on Pride Day. Then when she agreed to lie about the four points. On the promo tour she feels more and more guilty. She knew your marriage was fucked. She knew about Draymond, he flew in four or five times to spend a night with Alicia. Everyone on the tour knew. Judy starts to realize the girls who get Pharaohed, they end up as a side slut for him or for some other upper black man. At least till their looks fade. At every step the husband is the loser. Judy knew it. She wants you to know how bad she feels about what she did."

"Hmmmm. OK. I guess." Stony took my hand but I actually was OK. Didn't even check my nose. Cause of Stony.

Briana said, "So Alicia never should have won Pharaoh. It's all been..."

Mogumbo said, "Well, yes and no. It is for sure she should not have been top three on White Girl Pride Day. Smith together with all their stupid errors made Roberta the actual third place winner that night. But you know, once Alicia got to Cleveland, all that was out of Lady Flo's hands. Alicia really did beat the pants off of Elizabeth and Elsie that night. Some of it was them, but a lot of it was her. I really meant it when I said she would have won even in a stronger field."

Stony said, "Yeah."

"So yes and no is the answer. Take it however you want."

We sat in shock. How weird it all was. And how through the weirdness I'd found Stony. How we'd both found Bri. How when Stony and I were invited over to the lake-house we both figured we'd end up in bed with Briana. The girls had even hinted that it was time I got Lord MacDougall'd. Damn. Then they were going to show me their own invention, Lady Mac they called it. How we looked forward to it, how much we loved Bri, and how much we loved making love with her. But the evening had taken quite a turn.

Mogumbo asked, "Jeff, is she still with Quentin Q. Quenton?"

"As far as I know she is. We've had a little communication, not much. I think they're in his place in Malibu."

She said, "Yeah. It's what I've heard too."

Briana said, "Cunt is going to have to work hard to keep him."

Mogumbo shook her head. "Well, from what I hear he really likes Alicia. She's just what he wanted. So maybe he keeps her five or seven years? Who knows? After all, she's still young, still gorgeous. Eventually he'll dump her. But even then she's bound to hook up with some other black upper, they all do. Most of the girls can ride it till around age 35. Plus she'll get some of the royalties from her honeymoon pictures. Most goes to Pharaoh, but the girl gets something. She'll do OK."

I had to ask, "Is this all going to come out now? Are you publishing what you told us?" Cause, despite everything, I still didn't want Alicia to suffer.

Mogumbo's face scrunched up and she said, "If only. It was my chance to be a real journalist and I think I did OK at it. Hell, what I really think is I did a great job at it. But they...I won't say who...upper uppers obviously...are on me. They knew I was snooping. Let's just say they have some good ways of persuading me not to publish. Part of why I wanted to tell you all in person. They won't bother any of us about this just so long as the masses never find out. That's why you have to keep your mouths closed."

We all nodded agreement to this.

She went on. "Still, I feel pretty good about it. Good to be legit for a change. And what I found has had a pretty large impact. Because of me they know. They'll never say or admit what happened, but the real inside upper uppers know. Lady Flo is being pushed aside, no deal with Caswell. Her property, the Barrens, it's been taken from her as a penalty. She's no longer upper-upper. She'll be able to pretend for a while, but not too long before everyone knows she's broke. That's it, that's her punishment. The producers in on the scam got fired and Sir Reggie got chewed out about hiring better people. Wexner got a reprimand. They still don't know she's the leak. They can't do more to Judy than that without creating suspicion. I got my ass whooped. And that's it."

She paused for a long sip of her soda. We'd been at it for a while. Three of us sat in disbelief.

"Alicia gets to keep Pharaoh Quenton, she's home free. They go after her that's big time fucking with the Pharaoh franchise. Ain't gonna happen. Pharaoh himself has been told but he had nothing to do with any of it, so he's home free. Draymond...oh, guess I saved the best for last. Guess what?"

"What?" we all asked at once.

Mogumbo smiled for the first time. She let the smile linger and then began to chuckle.

"What?"

Mogumbo turned to Bri, actually reached out to touch her knee, and said, "Briana, get ready for a promotion. They know Draymond fucked around on this and he got his ass whipped too. But guess what? The town needs a new upper upper, in fact someone to lead the upper uppers. Who has the money, the stature, the influence to fill it? Your husband. That's who. Welcome to upper-upperville, honey. you're going up with him."

Briana was shocked. We all were. She didn't want to buy it. "No! No way. You already said Dray doesn't have upper upper money. It can't be him." Stony reached over for Bri's hand.

Mogumbo sighed and said, "It's what I would have thought too. But we'd both be wrong. It was easy for them to knock Lady Flo off her perch. Most of them hated her guts long before this. All her bullshit about being the best of the best and how God himself has anointed her. Made them sick. The problem was, who are they gonna elevate in her place? Our town has like 90 upper uppers total. They want two things. First a man. Everyone hated that Lady Flo got there as a woman. Second they want someone who isn't ancient, someone who can help develop a new generation of leadership. Who have they got? They see maybe 25 eligible black men in the upper uppers between ages 30 and 60. Take a look at these guys. Inbred Daddy's-boy morons for the most part. Pussy hounds who never did a thing in their lives..."

I interrupted, "Douchebags?" Mogumbo remembered and smiled prettily at me.

"Yes, you could call them douchebags, Never did a thing in their lives except sail a boat or drive a fancy car or go to lunch. Pussies. The upper uppers realize they're screwed. And then Lord Dinwiddy puts forward the idea. Draymond. He might be a pussy hound too, but everyone knows he's a person of real accomplishment and learning and drive. They need someone smart. Draymond is smart. Everyone admires and believes in this guy no matter what he did. Plus Dinwiddy's granddaughter Felicia is getting fucked by Dray on the side and Lord D. is liking that. You know, access to power through pussy. Oldest game there is. His idea is to move all the Barrens lands, everything taken from Lady Florence, over to Dray. To put him in charge of all the upper uppers. They vote. It was close but Dinwiddy's idea wins. They're doing the paper work on that as we speak."

Briana sat again in disbelief, shaking her head as if No, No. Stony and I went over to comfort and congratulate her. She shook us off.

"No, you all don't get it. Even if this is true and Draymond goes up, this is when he finally gets rid of me. He's not gonna bring..."

Mogumbo shakes her head in disagreement. "No, listen, Briana. Shush! Stop. I'm afraid it's you who doesn't get it. Wexner is still feeding me. You're part of the package they want. A white, a young white. How many upper uppers are white right now? Answer, two. Billy G. Packwith, the zop-boy money? He's 89. Fredericka Simpson-Gortchtwull, age 74, relict of J.J.B. Gortchwull, Gortchwull Industries. And she's been sick. They need you, or at least someone just like you. Time to time the whites are getting uppity, making too much noise. Look how they behaved on White Girl Pride Day. They're getting above themselves, upsetting everyone. They see that. They want you almost as much as they want Dray. You're in."

"Oh-My-God," and Briana burst into tears.

We left it at that.

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Back in Chignecto Stony and I settled again into our lives. Our connection with Pharaoh was over. We wanted normal life and normal love. I had a boat to help on. Stony had those kids to teach. We had each other.

We knew we weren't going to stay in Chignecto forever, but Stony and I have fond memories of the people there and of the lives we lived. We stayed busy. We worked hard. We contributed to the community. We loved each other like mad. We each had a lover, and sometimes even nice three-way, even four-way sex. That was fun, but it didn't matter much.

A year later we moved down to New York City, on the far edge of Queens. We'd saved what we had. Between what I cleared on the North Porter house and a small loan from Stony's Mom we had just enough money for me to open my own dealership. Briana offered us the money but we thought it better to do it on our own. The Quantum Excelsi-O line was brand new and dealerships were cheap at the time. I started in a little store front with just five cars on the lot. Then I hustled my ass off.

Stony got her degree and began teaching in the public schools. Second grade.

Five years in we were doing well. I employed five people and all of us earned a decent living. I resisted the temptation to put portraits of myself on the walls. The dealership was growing in value. We were on the edge of being almost rich. We got our own house, a nice one too, a big lawn and our own garden.

Stony and I had a baby girl that sixth year. We named her Angelica Arlene Montague-Rochefort, our little treasure. She's a beautiful color. To this day I like calling her Stony Jr.

I still hear from Alicia from time to time. Stony and I are still in love with Bri. Crazy-old-me is enjoying life as an upper upper and is still with Draymond. And we still get to play in her garden from time to time, just not as often as we'd like. Her thing with Moe'neyah fizzled out in the end, Moe's submission to Henry decided that, but Bri has a couple of new lovers. As have we. Willy and I are more stoat than ever now that we're family. The Scots are still with us. Stony and Arlene probably love each other more than ever. And now with more money in our pockets we get back to North Porter pretty regularly to see them all. Even Karla and Heinrich. We've had them over to dinner a couple of times and despite strong sales efforts by Karla, Stony has so far resisted the temptation to get any sort of intimate ring.

What can I say? We're happy.

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Stony and I were seated in the living room. Angelica was down for the night. Stony read her book as I flipped through the channels looking for anything of interest. I landed on a promo piece for the upcoming Black Pharaoh. A pretty girl, maybe 25 years old, was being interviewed on the street by Eyewitness News. I just caught the end of it as she said, "...after all, if you can't believe in Pharaoh, what can you believe in?" I turned off the TV.

I looked over at Stony on the couch, legs tucked up under her butt, her lips pursed in a funny frown. She was concentrated on her bee keeping book; bees were her latest passion. She was beautiful. Is beautiful. Is more. Is perfect. Then I look at her. And the world's alright with me. Just one look at her, and I know it's gonna be. A lovely day.

I walked over and gave her a big kiss on the cheek and then one on the back of her head.

Stony looked up and smiled. "What did I do to deserve that?"

I said, "You're nice."

"Is that all it takes?"

"Yes it is."

She nodded vaguely and then looked thoughtful, her fingertip holding her place in the book. She broke into a grin and we touched hands. She went back to the book. I went for a run, getting in better condition every day now. My two girls would be there for me when I got home.

THE END