All Comments on 'Polarisian Multiverse Bk. 01 Ch. 02'

Hey , nice start.

But...I believe you should change your style a bit.

With 1st and 2nd person you press the reader not only into one persons character but how you switch POV into both.

That is mildly said confusing .

If you want to write as 1st person then that´s your choise , and it shall be since it´s your story.

So instead of using I and YOU use I only and refer the other character by her/ his name. And when switching POV name said secuece as His(name) POV or Her(name) POV.

I am curious where your story will lead.

OH AND slow down the increasing of power and /or skill ,otherwise you will find your character becoming god like way to fast

as it will reduce the possibility for challenges and dangerous situation greatly.

good luck with your writing