Prophet and Loss

Meanwhile, Bob, Sally and Kathy were dashing around in the church offices, making them look presentable, as they had received a call from Pastor David Douglas, telling them that he was to visit them today.

Attached to the church was a small conference center where meetings could be held. The meeting would be in one of the rooms, there.

"Good afternoon Brother Douglas; may I say what a privilege it is for us to meet with you today?" Bob's tone was unctuous to such a degree that a fog warning should have been issued.

Brother Douglas raked him with a deep, penetrating stare. "A privilege, is it? Tell me Bob, when did you decide that you were a prophet of God? And could you tell me" he motioned at Sally and Kathy, "which one of these delightful young women is your wife?"

Bob stuttered before he replied. "My wife is Kathy. The other woman is Sally, she is married to my partner in our church, Paul Reed."

Again, that raking, penetrating stare. "You sure about that, Mr. Harris?"

An uneasy look flashed between Kathy and Sally.

"What do you mean?" Bob was now seriously out of his depth. And was starting to look worried.

"You don't have an Empyrean law marriage or two up your sleeve, do you?"

Bob's face paled.

Sally intervened, her voice was a sneering, arrogant thing, born of darkness and mean-spiritedness: "It's no use, Bob! It's clear that the little weasel I was married to has reported us to Brother Douglas. And so what if he has? You are the prophet of the Lord, Bob! Do something! Smite him and Paul down! Do it now!"

Brother Douglas said: "It's all too clear, now. You, Sally, are the main force behind this chicanery. You have managed to convince this worm that he is a prophet of the Lord. You then convinced his own wife to put up with your adulterous relationship together, whilst you cheated on your own husband. And when your lawful husband discovers your dirty, sordid assignations, Bob there decides to throttle him and damaged his vocal chords in the process.

"And all because you wanted to be married to a prophet and not a 'mere' pastor, as you put it.

"And Bob cannot smite anyone. Oh, but if he is stupid enough to try any of his judo moves, please be aware that both myself and Pete are fully licensed to carry firearms and if you try any crazy stuff, Mr Prophet, we would shoot you. Just to make sure there's no doubt, here, OK?"

Kathy edged away from Sally. She looked bemused. At that point Paul stepped forward, crossed over to Kathy and hugged her. She began to sob and Paul comforted her, returning the favour she had given him the previous evening.

"I'm sorry, Paul, but they convinced me that Bob was a Prophet."

Brother Douglas spoke up: "Nope. He's not a prophet, just an idiot who allowed a woman to turn his head from the path of righteousness. Although there's also the matter that for the past couple of years he has been stealing from Pastor Paul to the tune of $10,000 a year, so he's not been on that path for a good while, I think?"

"Bob, you stole his money and you stole his wife from him. Though I suspect she sort of threw herself at you, Bob, and turned your head with that garbage about you being a prophet."

Kathy stepped away from Paul and said: "Brother Douglas I am truly mortified that I allowed myself to be sucked into their crazy scheme. It all seemed so real when they explained it to me, the Empyrean marriages and stuff. But really, they were just a pair of no good cheaters. But I fell for it and poor Paul got physically hurt as well as cheated on. Paul, can you forgive me, please?"

Paul nodded. "Yes, of course I can forgive you. To my thinking, you were just as much a victim of them as I was. So, what happens now, Brother Douglas?"

"Yeah!" said Sally with a weapons-grade sneer. "What are you going to do about us?"

Brother Douglas ignored her outburst. "A report will be made of the adultery to the Church Elders, plus the police have been informed of the theft and the fraud and also of the assault by Bob Harris on Paul Reed. It's up to Paul if he wants it taken to court, but I'll back him no matter which way he decides to go."

Bob shook his head. This couldn't be happening to him. Could it? "From the heights of being a prophet to the risk of losing it all?" He hadn't realized he had spoken out loud until Paul replied with a sneer: "A real case of 'prophet' and loss, huh?"

Bob and Kathy managed to flee the office with whatever money was in petty cash, but the wheel had literally come off their bus and they were picked up by a sheriff's deputy a couple of counties over as they struggled to put on the spare.

The church elders fired Bob, leaving Paul in charge of the church. But it was no longer the same, so he was pleased to be able to take a newly created position at the Gospel World Church as an Outreach Minister.

And after his divorce, a cute and very single secretary at the Gospel World Church offices set her cap at him, as they used to say, so all was good for Paul.

Brother Douglas took over the Midvale Church of God and placed a preacher there who he trusted not to get any weird ideas about Empyrean laws and the like.

Kathy divorced Bob and left the area to live with her sister in Northern California where she started dating an owner of a small winery and Bob spent some time in jail for his crimes.

Sally and Bob never did get it together again. After all, she'd been the wife of a prophet. Why'd she want to associate with jail trash?