Pulling Him Closer

"Um, am I missing something?"

"You'll miss nothing if your answer to my question is 'yes,'" she sighed, soothingly running the fingertips of her left hand through my hair at the back of my head.

"You're confusing me, RJ," I whimpered. "Have you asked me a question?"

"I will now. Would you like to stay the night with me ?"

"Nah," I playfully lied since I'd caught on to her game.

"You sure? There's nothing I'd love more than to have the wonderful man, who now knows he's given me an angel, snuggle with me in my bed for the first time."

"Yeah. I think I'd like that, too," I whispered, taking her hand, and grasping it tightly in mine.

"Take me back to O2T so I can get my car."

The place had already been shut down for the night, but I went inside to grab some things like a clean change of clothes and my shaving kit. I followed RJ back to her house which was situated in a neighborhood near I-45 and the Sam Houston tollway. I parked on the curb and joined her on the driveway then went inside with her.

RJ settled into her leather couch. I sat beside her and placed my arm around her shoulders, encouraging her to cuddle.

"What do you think Jack will think of me?"

"I ask the same question about myself every single day."

"I imagine every parent in the world does, so there's no reason you shouldn't," I said. "I haven't been involved with him at all yet. I think my perspective is a lot different than yours."

She went quiet for several moments. "You're his father. It's an irrefutable fact. Whether you're his dad or not? Well … be patient. Give him time, you know? I think he'll come to understand you're his dad if you get as involved as you've said you want to be."

"Yeah?"

"Absolutely."

"An irrefutable fact, huh?" I asked.

"Pretty sure, because before that wonderful night we spent together, I hadn't been with anyone else in quite a long time, and none again until we made love last weekend.

"I'm kinda still wondering what went wrong. I was trying to be very careful."

"I thought about it for a long time."

"What'd you come up with?"

"The only thing I could think of is how I opened one of your condoms with my teeth. Maybe I nicked it."

I laughed harder than I had in ages. "Well, that might explain it."

"So … you're not angry with me?"

"I understand why you'd ask, but … no. Hardly. No way. Even if I wanted to be, I wouldn't have any right, because you were the one who spent the last four years of your life being pregnant then raising an awesome little kid, while I was … an absentee. I'll never forgive myself."

"Seriously? There was nothing you could've done differently. I mean … imagine if I'd have stumbled across your business the day you opened it, didn't care about what you were going through, walked up to you and said, 'Hello again, Rick. Even though you might think you have no clue who I am, you do know me. My name is Rachel Jarrett. We worked together before your accident.

"'Right before it happened, you and I shared a beautiful, intimate evening. It began with dinner and ended at your townhome. We had a lot of sex, I got pregnant, and now you have a son. His name is Jackson Richard Jarrett. He's four months old.'

"How do you think that would have played?"

"Oh, jeez. I don't know."

"These last four years are over and can't be changed. You need to give yourself some room, okay?"

"I'll try," I answered.

"Good," she said before rising from the couch.

She went into her kitchen and came back with something yummy. She sat next to me and unscrewed the top off some candied pecan gelato.

"This used to be your favorite," she said, scraping a spoon across the smooth surface of the frozen treat.

"Still is." I smiled as she brought the spoonful to my mouth.

We fed each other the delicious dessert over deep conversation. Half the pint disappeared as we talked mostly about Jack but also about us.

"Come on. It's bedtime," RJ said with a funny numb-tongued slur.

She ducked back to the kitchen to put the remaining gelato in her freezer and the spoon in her sink. I followed her to her bedroom where we undressed, climbed into her bed, and enjoyed each other in a way which redefined my understanding of intimate, emotionally connected, genuine lovemaking.

"Sorry to call you so early, Bing, but when you get to the shop, I won't be there. I'm taking the day off."

"Seriously? When have you ever done that?"

I laughed. "I know, I know. I'm a dull boy. If you're interested, consider yourself promoted to assistant manager. We'll talk about a retroactive pay bump when I'm back in the shop. You'll be in charge today."

"Oh! Cool! You got it, boss," she replied cheerily. "See you tomorrow?"

"Probably."

RJ and I spent the entire day together. It began when we picked Jack up from Parker and Ness's. We repaid some of the overnight favor by inviting Jack's cousin to spend the morning with us beginning with breakfast at the Pancake House. It would give his parents at least a few hours of respite on a lazy Sunday before we brought him back home at lunchtime.

My son was appropriately shy and wary of me at first, but as he observed his mother and I holding hands and generally being close to each other, his caution slowly faded. He enjoyed me giving him a ride on my shoulders as we strolled the walking trails at Lost Creek Park in Sugar Land. Thankfully, he weighed barely thirty-five pounds, so my leg was able to manage the effort fairly easily. RJ gave me a subtle wink which told me I was doing well in how I was engaging her … our child.

We swung through a fast-food drive-through to pick up some dinner before returning to RJ's home.

She told Jack to go inside and wash his hands. I was then questioned by her because, when ordering the meals, I'd not selected anything for myself.

"What's wrong? Not hungry?"

"I am, but I'm going to go back to my place," I said. "Today has been absolutely fantastic, but I think it might be best to not overdo it. I don't want Jackson feeling overwhelmed by me suddenly being around all the time. Does that make sense? For now, I think he needs to know he's still the most important guy in your life."

"You sure?" she whispered before kissing me softly and tenderly.

"No. I don't know what I'm doing. Trying to find the right balance, I guess."

"You're wiser than you think." She sighed into my shoulder as we hugged.

"I hope so," I answered, breathing in the scent of RJ's hair. "I have a serious question I'd like to ask you."

"Okay," she said, leaning back to look into my eyes.

"Are we keeping this a secret?"

"That I have a child? It's no secret to anyone close to me. That you're Jack's father might be a surprise to some people, but … no. I see no reason to hide anything. Why?"

"I think I'm going to need a little outside perspective. Some advice. But I can't seek it without filling in certain details."

"I understand, baby. Do whatever you need to help process it all. I get how the situation is so much more different for you than me. You have my permission to be honest with anyone you trust."

"I love you, RJ. It seems weird to say it so simply, but I was in love with you months before I got hurt, and when those neurons reconnected, all those feelings were still there. I'm sorry I never said it that night."

"I wish I had, too." She smiled sweetly. "I love the crap out of you, and I'm not going anywhere."

I laughed.

"Dang. I just remembered something," Rachel groaned. "I need to call my mom. We had a bit of a tussle yesterday morning when I confronted her about coming to see you. It got heated, and I want to apologize and see if she's still willing to keep Jack while I work."

"Yeah. About that," I hesitantly said. "I got cross with her myself when she did what she did. I told her she was barred from ever coming back to O2T. I'll do it face-to-face as soon as it's possible, but if you'd pass on my regrets and apologies, too, I'd very much appreciate it."

"I will," she said, giving me another smooch.

I hugged my love, softly stroking her little butt just before Jack careened into my leg on the way to the table to eat his dinner. Thankfully, it was my good one he'd struck. He timidly offered a "sorry."

I scruffed my fingers through his hair and said, "See ya later, Jack."

When I returned home, I sent a text.

6:44 PM
If you and Brenda have time tomorrow morning, would y'all mind meeting for coffee?

7:01 PM
Asking for a friend?

7:01 PM
Something like that. SB's near Sweetwater & Lex in SL?

7:02 PM
Sure. We have senior staff conference first so 10:00 ok?

7:04 PM
Perfect. See you then.

I read sixty pages of Tripwire For Hire before I went to bed.

The next morning, I went through the paperwork Bing placed in my inbox which included several shipping manifests, invoices, and FFL transfers I needed to sign and file away in the fireproof safe. When she arrived for the day, we briefed the schedule and assigned trainers to customers and clients as was our usual first thing.

"I met him," I said when we'd wrapped the task up.

"Met who?"

"My son. I met my son, Jackson, on Saturday and got to spend yesterday with him and RJ."

"Yeah? How'd it go?"

"It was awesome," I said with an easy chuckle. "He was a shy little guy at first, but it began wearing off after lunch."

I filled her in on some of the specifics of our activities as she listened attentively.

"I have an appointment with Todd and Brenda Carlson at ten o'clock, so I'll be stepping out for an hour or two. She was a single mom when they met, and I want to get some perspective on what it's like to navigate those waters."

"Interesting," she said, elongating the syllables notably. "Sorta kinda like a blended family?"

"Well, not really, considering blended families have stepchildren in the picture⁠—"

"Either way ," she interrupted, "it usually means marriage. Have you left something out?"

I laughed and said, "Don't get ahead of yourself."

She grinned pleasantly. "Told ya."

"Told me what?" I challenged.

"Last Sunday, I said I thought you two were keen on each other." She chuckled, "and it looks like I was right."

"We were keen on each other years ago, Bing, and still very much are."

"What I see on your face is freaking awesome. Rick's not a dull boy anymore." She smiled, then stepped away to unlock the doors and flip the OPEN sign on.

I departed the shop at 9:45 to head to the coffee place near Carlson & Carlson Research's offices. Todd and Brenda were leaving their car as I pulled into the parking lot. After all three of us had placed our orders, I paid the tab and joined them at the table and began our discussion. We spent a half hour at it.

"You're doing the right things," Brenda offered. "When Todd came into the picture, Stacie was only a little older than your son is now. It was maybe about a year before he went from being called Mr. Todd to being addressed as Dad.

"Her situation was much different than yours is with your son. God willing, Stacie will never need to learn the details about her biological father. She considers Todd to be every bit her daddy.

"I don't think Stacie remembers much of the time before him, and I would imagine it'll be the same with Jackson as he gets older, especially since he's even younger than Stacie was. The fact you're his blood will also be significant."

"I hope so."

"I know I'm probably sounding preachy, but you have to fully commit. Like totally and completely commit," Todd added.

"That's my plan if RJ will allow it."

The following autumn, RJ enrolled Jackson in the pre-Kindergarten program taught at the local high school. It was staffed by four full-time educators assisted by juniors and seniors studying the early childhood education academic focus area. It was a Texas-sponsored curriculum which earned the students dual credit in state colleges and thus an avenue for an expedited degree and certificate to help address the state-wide teacher shortage. It appeared as though there were thirty to forty kiddo's Jackson's age on the first day of class.

It was a half-day program which began at 8:30 and ended at 12:30. Jack really seemed to enjoy it, especially since he'd seldom interacted with children his age before.

Rachel and I settled into a harmonious balance over the course of the following months. I began to truly feel like we were a family. A family ! Our time together allowed RJ and I to grow our relationship, to nurture ourselves and our souls, and of course, to enjoy the pleasures of adulting.

Spending nights in my hideaway had become a rarity by that point, but one time, since we didn't have to worry about curious ears of neighbors or anything else, Rachel and I threw everything we had at each other, engaging in intense passion the likes of which we'd never had before. It was almost as though we had sex while in the middle of having sex, and it was thrilling. That night was incredible .

I laughed like a schoolboy when, after losing my balance during my standing climax, I needed to fetch a washcloth to clean my cum from Rachel's breasts. Still a little wobbly, I'd missed my target when trying to flop back in bed. Rachel and I hadn't shared my nest in a while, so my aim was off, and I wound up whacking the back of my head on the wall.

Rachel laughed, too, kissed my boo-boo, my lips, then said we needed to put an end to the shenanigans lest someone else get hurt in the ultimate of contact sports. I needed to take a hydrocodone to ease the throbs. I didn't take a full dose. I split a tablet and took one half, then we settled in for a well-earned slumber.

Subconsciously sensing something, I awakened in a hazy delirium, momentarily uncertain of my whereabouts. The back of my skull ached. I rubbed it and found a tender goose egg.

I heard noises on the other side of the door. I opened it and saw a shadow. An hourglass figure. A woman? It was moving.

"Hello?" I barked into the darkness.

"It's me , Rick," the shadow spoke.

"Who ?"

"Have you forgotten?"

"What are you doing here?" I shouted after slapping a light switch to the on position.

The woman squinted against the illumination.

"Don't say that. You know why I'm here."

"Stop talking!" I demanded.

"Do. Not. Move," RJ said quite clearly.

She'd moved around me and approached the woman from behind, my Ruger LCP in her hands. I'd added her fingerprint and a second PIN code to the gun lockbox I kept under the bed.

"Who the fuck are you !?" Melody Jensen screeched.

"Federal Agent Jarrett," she answered calmly. "You're under arrest for breaking and entering into the premises of a federally licensed firearms dealer."

She grabbed the woman's wrist and flung her forward, almost on top of me. I managed to dodge her flailing legs.

"What the hell are you doing here? You're in violation of the restraining order!"

"I miss you! Don't you understand? I've been keeping an eye on you and know you stay nights here sometimes. I want to stay with you!"

Rachel decocked then tossed me my pistol before forcing both of Melody's wrists behind her back, twisting her elbows to bring her hands up almost between her shoulder blades.

"You're hurting me, bitch !" Melody screamed.

"A hollow-point ․380 to your brain stem will hurt a lot more," I growled, unlocking my phone to call 911.

"Actually, babe, it probably wouldn't hurt at all," Rachel said coolly. "That'd be a merciful dispatch."

If the gravity of the situation wasn't what it was, I'd have laughed.

I limped awkwardly back to the private bathroom and unplugged Rachel's hair dryer from the outlet.

Good enough for jazz, I thought to myself, taking it with me to bind Melody's wrists as she spat and cursed.

"You're insane , woman," I said, thrusting the business end of the dryer into her tied hands. "Hold this."

I placed her face down onto the hardwood floor and straddled her upper thighs to pin and restrain her.

"Rick! Why are you doing this?"

"Because you're crazy, Melody. I told you last year I didn't want anything to do with you anymore."

"You're an asshole !"

"Of course I am."

I heard the approach of wailing sirens.

"Do I need to open the gate?" RJ asked.

"Oh, duh. Yeah," I answered.

She ran to the front of the shop then went back inside my residence to put shorts on under the oversized t-shirt I'd lent her to sleep in. I had just enough time to dress, too, before the officers pounded on the glass doors.

I sat my Ruger on a register counter and unlocked the door.

"On your knees!" an officer shouted.

As bad as it hurt, I did exactly what I was told. Rachel did, too, though she refused to let go of the cord wrapped around the intruder's arms.

"Everyone is disarmed. Mine is on the counter with its safety engaged," I said and pointed.

Cold steel was placed about my wrists anyway.

"I'm a federal agent. BATF. My ID is in there," Rachel spoke and gestured toward the door to my abode.

"Stand slowly and guide me," the lead demanded, holding the chain of the cuffs behind RJ's back.

They were gone for barely fifteen seconds.

"Sorry, ma'am," the officer said, uncuffing her.

"You're doing your job, so don't be. The man is Rick Sanger, former BATF. We own this place. Please uncuff him. The woman is … I don't know who she is, but he does."

An officer immediately removed the cuffs from my wrists and helped me back to my feet.

"In addition to the B&E, she's in violation of a protective order. I don't care what you charge her with, I only want her out of here," I advised.

"You fucking asshole !" Melody Jansen screamed. "I love you!"

"No, you don't. You're nuts," I responded. "Get medical help."

She was shown to the back of one of the four Stafford police cars which came. Rachel and I were briefly interrogated, agreeing to come to the substation to finish our statements for the report later that day. My shop was once again quieted. It was 1:19 AM when I re-locked the doors and closed the gate.

RJ and I settled back into our bed, and I pulled up the security system's app to try and figure out how the woman had managed to get inside. The love of my life snuggled close to me to help scan the video feeds.

"Stop. Go back thirty seconds," she requested. I tapped an icon twice.

"That's her, isn't it?" she asked, pointing at the quadrant displaying the parking lot.

A lone figure entered the frame. The individual walked in from the sidewalk about fifteen minutes before closing time. If she had driven, she'd parked somewhere else.

"Yeah. I think so," I answered, switching to cameras inside my shop.

We watched as the woman skulked around the retail showroom, obviously trying to avoid drawing attention to herself as she ducked into the mop closet. It was very busy, so the fact that none of my staff noticed her was forgivable.

"Are you kidding me?" Rachel laughed. "She hid in there for … what, five hours?"

"Maybe I should buy some sort of biometric identification system. What else can I say? She's nuts. I'll be making sure to check every closet before we close from now on."

"Good idea," she said, pulling me closer and kissing me tenderly. "Nice job tonight."