All Comments on 'Queen of the Underworld Ch. 01'

dm, an interesting and erotically imaginative modernist variation on the mythology. You impressed me that I did not notice any obvious anachronisms, which always drive me crazy in poorly rendered historical fiction.

I am looking forward to see how you continue to develop this clever storyline in future postings.

Really like the idea of the story but it could've been executed much much better. It is written as though a high schooler wrote it. Extremely similar to how friends of mine would write their smut, "I did this and he did that". I'd suggest reading other, high ranked stories and also visiting the advise columes to see how to better tell tales. Like I said, I like the idea. Your writing style just needs a little help