Return to Garden Place

Author's Note: Although ratings are nice, nothing beats a comment or two about what you liked or disliked about a story. Please take a moment to leave one. Thank you.

Spring 2004

"Welcome back to Good Morning USA, and for those of you just joining us, I'm Sheila Parker, filling in for your regular host, Annette Ryan, who has been sidelined this week with a mild case of the flu. Feel better, Annette, everyone here at GMU misses you terribly," the blonde-haired woman in green said to both the studio audience spread out across the large sound stage and the multitude watching on their television screens at home. "Joining us in our next half hour are some old friends who really don't need any introduction, the cast of that classic late 80s sitcom, 19 Garden Place. They'll be here to talk about their new film -- Return to Garden Place, which will be premiering on this Network on Friday night."

Briefly turning away from the audience to the five empty director chairs laid out behind her, Sheila glanced at her image in the large offstage monitor to check her appearance, once again feeling pleased that she had worn the bright green dress instead of that drab blue one that the show's fashion coordinator had laid out for her. Then, making sure that her professional smile was firmly in place, the forty-six-year-old turned back to the crowd.

Like so much about Sheila, the smile was a fabrication and she really didn't miss Annette Ryan at all. In fact, her most fervent wish was that the long-time star of GMU might have a relapse, or even better, come down with something that might prevent her from returning to the show permanently. It never occurred to the second-rate personality that, if that were ever to come to pass, she would hardly be the one that the producers of the top-rated morning show would pass the baton to.

Catching a hand signal from the wings that her guests were ready, Sheila disregarded the introduction she had just read off the teleprompter, as well as the stage director's intention for the cast to walk onstage en masse, and proceeded to introduce each actor and the role they played in both the old show and the upcoming film. Regardless of what the Network thought, Garden Place was hardly a classic and the cast hardly old friends -- especially one in particular. If it had been up to her, they wouldn't have been on the show at all.

"Kaitlyn Giordano," Sheila cried out as a thirty-five-year-old brunette with shoulder length hair stepped out on stage. Only five two and a hundred and twenty-four pounds, the actress who had played Cyndi Reynolds on the original show wore a form fitting, short sleeved white dress that showed off her prominent bust. Over the course of the show's original eight-year run, viewers had appreciably watched her character go from an awkward preteen to a rapidly developing adolescent and finally, by the time the show ended, a stunning young woman.

As Kaitlyn took her seat in the first chair, the second member of the ensemble appeared. Doreen Young was fifty-eight, stood five seven and although taller than her co-star, actually weighed a few pounds less. Her short black hair barely extended to her neck line, around which she wore a small string of pearls that accented the simple sleeveless navy-blue dress she wore. She had played Louise Reynolds, Cyndi's mother on the series.

Next came Delores Grant, who played Harriet Lee, grandmother and mother to the two previous characters. Also five two, the seventy-nine-year old's list of acting credits dated back to the early fifties and her role on Our Little Family, one of the first sitcoms. Dressed in a multi-colored full-length dress, the slim actress projected that same aura of sexuality that had defined her long career.

Nearly seven decades separated Delores and the next arrival. Starring in her first film, Emily Carr was a new addition to the cast, playing the role of Kari Thomas, Cyndi's daughter. Already a veteran of a half-dozen commercials, the thirteen-year-old was dressed simply in a light blue blouse and denim skirt.

Last to appear was Spencer Morgan, Martin Thomas on the series. Five ten and two hundred pounds, he filled out his sports shirt and slacks with a muscular build that seemed incongruous, given his actual age of fifty-seven. A few bits of gray dotted his hair and tightly trimmed beard, but both only seemed to add to his appeal.

Fans of the show, and there were far more than Sheila imagined, would remember that it had revolved around the residents of a three-story walkup owned by Louis Reynolds and her mother. Louise, who was divorced, shared the first floor with her teenage daughter while Harriet occupied the small attic apartment. Sandwiched in between was Martin and his own teenage son, Alan.

The reunion film picked up fifteen years after the show's final episode and not much had changed at Garden Place, other than Harriet having moved to a senior living facility, which allowed Delores to limit her role to just a cameo. Cyndi now lived on the first floor with Kari, and Louise had moved to the attic. Martin still occupied his old place, but now he shared it with a previously unmentioned nephew who had just retired from the Army.

Sheila kept to the questions on the small index cards provided by the staff for the first few minutes of the interview, directing most of them to Kaitlyn, who was not only the star of the film but also executive producer. The last of her inquiries allowed Kaitlyn to explain that Tom Reed, who was playing Mike Reeve, Martin's nephew, had been unable to make the show due to a prior commitment.

"Now that you brought it up," Sheila said, having been waiting for an opening to interject a little controversy to spice up the fluff piece, "I'm sure many fans are curious as to why you added a new potential love interest to the show, rather than have Boyd Hudson return in the role of Alan Thomas. Didn't your two characters get married in the series finale?"

If Sheila had expected the question to catch Kaitlyn off guard, she was sorely disappointed. Without missing a beat, the veteran of three television shows and nearly a dozen cinematic features gave a well-practiced reply.

"The writers did consider bringing back Boyd," Kaitlyn replied, "but since the original dynamic of the show was that of a single mom raising her daughter, they decided to stay with it. After all, if it ain't broke, why fix it?"

"So, like her mother, Cyndi couldn't make her marriage work?" Sheila interjected, still trying to get a reaction out of Kaitlyn.

"Actually, she's a widow," Kaitlyn pointed out, showing that Sheila hadn't done her homework on the new film. "Part of the backstory is that Alan was killed in a car crash, which was what necessitated Cyndi moving back to Garden Place."

What Kaitlyn didn't say was that not bringing back Boyd Hudson was one decision that all of the original cast heartily agreed with. Boyd, who was two years younger than Kaitlyn, even though their characters were supposed to be the same age, had been viewed as precocious when the series had first started. Over the years, however, he'd grown into an obnoxious young man and managed to antagonize just about everyone on the set. In the years since the series ended, Boyd had managed to get himself fired off two other shows, and from what anyone had heard, he was currently working at his brother's car dealership back in Indiana. In the first drafts of the script, Alan and Cyndi were simply supposed to be divorced, but Kaitlyn had insisted that his character be killed off, to forestall any suggestion of Boyd also making a guest appearance.

Seeing that she wasn't getting anywhere with Kaitlyn, Sheila shifted her attention to her co-star sitting to her right.

"So, tell me, Doreen," she asked, "what was it about this new film that made you decide to return to acting after, what has it been, ten years? As I recall, you announced your retirement shortly after you were outed in Lara Robert's controversial book, Hollywood Queer."

Like Kaitlyn, Doreen was too much of a professional to let herself be flustered by a question she expected to be asked. It was obvious to her that Sheila was determined to turn what was basically supposed to be a softball piece to promote the film into an interrogation, one that, if she was lucky, might produce a viral moment that might boost her standing with the Network. Taking a short breath, Doreen calmly answered the question, which only seemed to irritate the blonde even more.

"Yes Sheila, I did retire from acting ten years ago," Doreen smiled, "but it had little to do with that piece of tabloid trash that can only be laughingly referred to as a book. While it's true that I didn't advertise my sexuality, it's also true that I wasn't in the closet either. Most of my friends and co-workers knew of my sexual preference; and it never prevented me from getting a role before and I really didn't expect it to do so afterwards. My decision to change the direction of my life really had nothing to do with people in general now knowing I was a lesbian."

From the expression on her face, it was obvious that Sheila wasn't happy with the answer.

"And to answer the first part of your question," Doreen continued, "the only thing that really would've gotten me back in front of a camera was the desire to do a favor for someone I've always looked upon as a surrogate daughter, and who has grown into not only a great actress but also an excellent television producer."

The smile that Doreen displayed as she answered was as false as the one Sheila had exhibited earlier. The only difference was that she was a lot better at it, which infuriated the younger woman even more.

"We were very lucky to have Doreen back with us," Kaitlyn interrupted, drawing attention back to herself before the hostess could ask another question of the older woman. "In fact, one of the conditions I gave the Network when they approached me about the movie was that I would only consider doing it if Doreen was also onboard. I couldn't imagine doing it without her."

At that, both Spencer and Delores also chimed in with how happy they all were to be working together again. Seeing her first attempts to stir things up weren't going anywhere, Sheila tried a different track, asking a few soft questions of the other cast members before turning back to Doreen.

"You know, Doreen, it just occurred to me that Kaitlyn is now the same age you were when Garden Place first premiered back in 1981, and that you're actually two years older than Delores was when she played the grandmother," she said.

"Your point being?" Doreen asked.

"Just that you both seem to have aged into the roles," Sheila replied, having momentarily lost her train of thought and whatever point she had been trying to make.

The reason for her distraction became clear during the commercial break, when Sheila was brusquely pulled aside by the show's producer who, in a tone loud enough to be heard onstage, said that he didn't know what the fuck she thought she was doing out there, but he wanted it stopped right now. After the break, he wanted her to use the rest of the segment to take questions from the studio audience, and keep whatever opinions she might have about anything to herself.

'Damn, he's pissed,' Sheila thought as she walked back onstage, even as one of the interns headed out into the audience with a wireless microphone. 'I guess I'm going to have to offer him another blow job to smooth things over.'

After twenty-five years in the business, Sheila really thought she would've been past that sort of thing. It never occurred to her that lack of talent might explain the fact that she wasn't.

-=-=-=-

"What was her problem?" Kaitlyn asked as they walked offstage after the segment ended.

"I guess I should've warned you," Doreen said in a much lower tone. "We have a bit of a history."

"Not a member of your fan club, I'm guessing," Kaitlyn smiled.

Doreen replied with a smile of her own.

"Well, if it's any satisfaction, I think she's now paying the price for being such a bitch," Kaitlyn added, gesturing to the edge of the stage, where Sheila appeared to be getting a dressing-down from the same heavyset man in a headset that had words with her earlier.

They couldn't hear all of the exchange, but what they could pick up was interesting enough. It was clear that Sheila had offered some sort of restitution for her misstep, but that it had been declined. Kaitlyn could just about make out the phrase, "Don't kid yourself, honey, it wasn't that good."

From what else they could pick up, they learned that when viewers tuned in tomorrow, someone else would be guest hosting the show. It was equally clear that the ambitious blonde had really thought that she had been picked to fill in because she was the best possible choice, whereas the truth was that she had been selected because she was the least threatening to Annette Ryan. The regular host's contract gave her approval of any guest host, and she remembered all too well how she herself had managed to displace the woman who had preceded her. It was a mistake she was too smart to repeat.

Leaving Sheila to her fate, the two actresses walked away from the stage and out the door leading to the long corridor beyond.

"Hopefully, our next promotional spot will go better," Kaitlyn offered as they neared the elevators.

"That's at one o'clock, right?" Doreen asked.

"Yeah, on the midday show," Kaitlyn confirmed. "Doris Walsh is going to be doing that one, and I'm sure she'll be more professional."

"So, what do you want to do in the meantime?" Doreen inquired. "It's still only half past seven."

"I could definitely go for breakfast," Kaitlyn replied. "Why don't we gather up everyone and I'll take us all out to eat?"

That, as it turned out, was easier said than done. At seventy-nine, Delores Grant was still a trouper, quite willing to get up in the wee hours to do the early morning show, but the only way she was going to repeat the performance a second time this afternoon was to take a good nap in between. Emily, the newest addition to the cast, had already gone off with her mother to see some of the sights, promising to be back for the second interview. Spencer, they discovered, had simply disappeared, lured away, no doubt, by adoring fans of both their show and the three highly successful ones he had done afterwards. Like them a professional, there was no doubt in their minds that the veteran actor would be where he was supposed to be, when he was supposed to be -- even if he was missing a few articles of clothing when he arrived.

"Looks like it's just you and me, kid," Doreen laughed, recalling the days when Kaitlyn had actually been one.

"I'd watch who you're calling kid, granny," Kaitlyn responded with a broad smile as they exited the studio and onto the streets of midtown Manhattan.

-=-=-=-

Since it was now just the two of them, Kaitlyn and Doreen decided to simply head back to their hotel, which was only a few blocks away, and eat in the restaurant there. Their residency at the famed hostel would allow them to secure one of the small alcoves where they could have a little privacy.

Even though they spent much of the last month together, today would be the first chance the two of them had to really talk and catch up. The reunion movie had been a last-minute replacement for another project that the Network had to cancel, due to a scandal involving two of its principal actors. It had gone from an idea to filming in little more than a week, making use of existing sets and stock exterior footage of the old show, with a decent script being only a secondary consideration. So, it had been a whirlwind of shooting schedules and rewrites, with little time in between for anything else. The final version of the film had only been delivered to the Network two days ago.

"So, are you happy with how the film finally turned out?" Doreen asked as she nibbled at the breakfast in front of her.

"Well, considering the time we had to do it, it didn't turn out all that bad," Kaitlyn replied. "I mean, it's really not much more than an expanded episode of the old show, and, if nothing else, it does give me another executive producer credit."

"Any chance that it could go to series again?" Doreen asked, having heard a rumor that if the ratings for the TV-Movie were good enough it might be considered.

"Well, it's television, and stranger things have happened," Kaitlyn said, "but to be honest, I really doubt it. The Network just needed something quick and cheap to fill a hole in the schedule, and I'm guessing that by Monday it'll be all but forgotten."

"Well, at least it'll help you go for bigger and better things," Doreen noted.

"Yes, there's that," Kaitlyn agreed.

"By the way, I know I really didn't get the chance to say this before, but I really want to thank you for thinking of me when they green lighted the project," the older actress said. "I know the first draft didn't have either my or Delores's character in it."

"Which was a mistake," Kaitlyn said, "and I made it clear that without the two of you there wasn't going to be a movie."

"But no Boyd," Doreen added.

"God no!" Kaitlyn laughed. "If I never see that little creep again, I'll be more than happy."

"Well, he's not so little any more, but I understand why you feel that way," Doreen replied.

"I don't think you know the half of it," Kaitlyn offered. "I can't remember how many times I caught him in my dressing room trying to get a look at me while I was changing? The last time he'd even brought a camera with him. Some magazine had offered a lot of money for a topless photo of me and he was trying to collect it."

"I can understand the first part of that," Doreen said. "Half of our audience back then were teenage boys wanting to see you in a tight top or a bikini. In fact, every time you went up a cup size, we got a boost in the ratings."

"I think you're exaggerating," Kaitlyn laughed.

"No, I'm not," Doreen insisted. "After all, no one was tuning in to see my boobs," she added, glancing down at her own bust, which was a full cup size smaller. "But I will say that sneaking in with a camera was definitely over the line."

"Definitely," Kaitlyn agreed. "If anyone is going to benefit by displaying these puppies, it's going to be me."

"Was that why you did that werewolf movie back in '92?" Doreen asked.

A few years after Garden Place had gone off the air, Kaitlyn, who was by then twenty-three, had appeared semi-nude in a low budget horror film. In fact, she not only bared her much appreciated mounds, but had engaged in several simulated sex scenes, one of which involved another woman. In the year and a half that followed, she also did several other topless scenes, but it was the ones in the werewolf film that people always remembered.

"No, that wasn't for the money," Kaitlyn confessed. "In fact, I actually got paid less for Werewolves of San Francisco than I did for a single episode of Garden Place. I brought out 'the girls' to shatter that sweet little girl image that everyone kept trying to wrap around me. Every script my agent sent me had me playing basically the same character as our show. I was being typecasted as the fucking Marsha Brady of the nineties."

"As I recall, the actress that played Marsha also did a topless scene in a low budget movie a few years after Brady Bunch," Doreen noted, "probably pretty much for the same reason."

"She did?" Kaitlyn asked, surprised that she'd never heard of that.

"Yes, but it was just one of those 'don't blink or you'll miss it' kind of things," Doreen explained.

"Oh," Kaitlyn simply said.

"Your movie, on the other hand..." Doreen continued. "Well, I read that your debut, shall we say, was the most paused scene of the year when it came out on DVD."