Rocky Ch. 01

"And ordering a pizza."

Well, I said it. Whether Jay chose to hear it or not was on him.

"Even if it's a 10pm pizza because you need a shower, Jay!"

I mean, what was on me was how I still hadn't secured my nostalgic novelty bowling shirt yet!

"But try to give me a timeframe, Jay so I know when to contact Alice for one of her inhibition spells!"

"10pm and I'll be clean, Rocky!"

Oh, Alice is one of the local witches who hangs out on the Strip in front of the Fragrant Incense Shop. She has a lot of spells and gives away a free half purple pill with each spell and tells you that her spell takes about 15 minutes to take effect, so, well, Alice is a very popular witch, so.

[Grr, beep, grr, beep, Rocky's gunship gray truck going bye, bye]

[Grr, beep, grr, beep, Mrs. Bentley's luxury sedan going bye, bye]

[Grr, beep, grr, beep, Mrs. Matterson's run of mill sedan going bye, bye]

[Crash, scrap, side swipe, the guys still checking out Mrs. Bentley's cleavage]

"I'm boo-hoo in my belly for my baby, Mrs. Bentley!"

"Oh, your tight little butt will be all boo-hoo just after 10pm tonight, Rocky! And I hope that I don't have a baby in my belly!"

Oh, Mrs. Bentley says that every time, so.

"Holy bejesus, Rocky! Is this how dress in your neighborhood? I can see everything! Also, ooh, did I miss a sex party or something, hmm?"

"Alice, no this isn't how I dress every time while outside, but there was a lot of commotion here today with all of the "grr, beep, grr, beep" tow rucks and all and Jay is one of the drivers, so? Also, Alice, this is Mrs. Bentley. Mrs. Bentley, Alice the witch, so."

"(Giggles)"

"Oh, Mrs. Bentley and I know each other, Rocky. I may or may not have placed a bet with Mrs. Bentley that you couldn't touch her chest bone if you went ahead and tit fucked her straight on, but we were both tripping out on purple pills at an event, so don't read anything into that, so."

"(Giggles)"

"Anyways, sweetie, I came over as soon as I got your emergency text, so what do you need from me tonight, hmm? And my fee is extra since we're not on the Strip, so? Also, ahem!"

[Mrs. Bentley slides a $20 into Alice's palm for clearing losing the bet. Rocky wasn't going to reach]

Well, I explained my bad gasoline situation date night to Alice as best as I could, so.

"Woo, woo, where ever you lay, straight or at an angle, let it be under Jay. Woo."

[Extends the fee due hand]

"And since it's still early, Rocky, I put the spell on the half purple pill, so don't take it until you at least call in for the pizza, so."

See, folks? A valid spell, complete with instructions and a guarantee!

"Also, listen, you're pretty sweet and all, Rocky, so I feel compelled to let you know that Jay has been fucking Mindi for the last few weeks during some Tuesday night TV program, just so you know. Also, also, there are no refunds on fees that have already been paid. Also, also, also, since you can't go to the Strip tonight, can I have the coven meet up over here at you place then?"

Well, I think all that meant was that Alice cared about me and wasn't going to let Jay just get his piece of ass and put me in the rearview, right?

End Rocky 01