All Comments on 'Roommates Pt. 03 - Sunday'

The first chapter was a little rough, but the premise was solid. Second chapter was much better written. This one not so much. I'm not too precious about punctuation or grammar, but most of the mistakes could have been caught with some basic spell checking. The bigger issue is the pacing. The call to the brother was really rushed and should have been saved for a later chapter. The constant exasperation about being called a lesbian has also run it's course. Slow it down. The characters are great, but the plot's all over the place.

Keep writing....I love the way you describe the character ...

Nice Love Story!

Continue writing more about their love for each other, marriage evolution and coming out to their parents!

Really hoping to see more of this. Please keep writing.

Such a sweet love story.

I have enjoyed this story but it isn't finished, We still need to see the coming out to families the forth coming baby . It has been more of a romance story and not just a lick the slit story so in needs the rest of the story. I have read seceral of your writing and enjoy them all. keep it up and thank you. Pappasleaze!

This story has evolved quite a bit in my head. I have a whole progression and (what I think is) a great ending. Yes, it is a romance story, I like my characters to have that because it makes the sex more natural to write. IMHO more fun too.

I've enjoyed this, maybe we'll get a completion one day

I actually have a draft of part 4 and maybe a 5 depending on how I tell it. I have entered the completed story (sans explicit sex) into a contest. I didn't win, but I got a bunch of thumbs up and honorable mentions. Fitting the PG version into this version will take time to get my head in the right space. Suffice to say, it is and will always be, a story of true love. The sex just makes it better.