Rotten To The Core

"Indeed. Laura Stürmer, scion of the notorious dynasty of the same name. You have grown nicely since I last saw you," the last member of the chapter, Maria, said. She was a pale, willowy whip of a woman, with auburn tresses tumbling down her back in a cascade of free-flowing locks. She wore mostly black, the only dash of color a crimson tie around her neck. Silver stitching snaked down the arms of her blouse, seemingly shifting under Laura's gaze. One moment, the silvery thread appeared like some kind of angular runes, the next it resembled nothing more like trace lines on a circuit board. She blinked and looked up. Maria's eyes were golden.

"Do we know each other?" Laura asked, taking a seat opposite Maria. Jenna pushed a plate her way, laden with steak, potatoes and vegetables.

"We brushed past each other during your first year in Briou," Maria said, a fleeting smile on her lips. "You were much too busy to notice me -- or the other graduates. Well, you following the family tradition was kind of a big deal. The Headmaster didn't shut up about you, even holding a small speech that he'd personally bleed anyone dry who would think about bullying you."

Laura nearly choked on her first bite of steak. "He did what?"

"Not to be a dickhead but what's so special about you anyway?" Eric asked, pointing with the blunt end of his fork. "I mean, you're cute enough, but..."

"Don't ask me," Laura said. "I'm no Paladin like my father or a Witch like mom. No magic to call my own, no divine patron, nada." She locked gazes with Maria. "Believe me, the instructors in Briou didn't exactly offer any special treatment. Arach especially loved knocking me about."

"Your bloodline has been a part of the Order from its humble beginnings," Maria said. "It's immaterial how it manifests but the blood of heroes runs through your veins."

"Not special my ass," Jenna laughed. "Just to put things into perspective -- Laura has some of the best marksmanship and sword fighting marks I have seen in about a decade of graduates."

"And I worked my shapely ass off to earn every single one of them," Laura grumbled. "My hands still stink of cordite thanks to all the hours I spent at the range while others had fun making music or having sex." She speared at a chunk of potato with her fork.

"Speaking of gear," Maria said. "If you could see me in my workshop after lunch, I'll provide your equipment."

"Which is where?" Laura asked.

"Downstairs," Jenna said. "Gym, range, sparring chambers and the locker room are down there too."

"It's like a damn supervillain lair," Eric said, grinning amicably. "The one thing missing is a super computer."

"How long did you say you've been running this place?" Laura asked.

"Two weeks," Jenna said around a mouthful of food. "Without Maria, we'd still be digging extra cellars by now."

"Hey, don't heap too much praise on my narrow shoulders. Without the GobCo guys and your platinum credit card, all my magic would have done squat."

"There's a GobCo in town?" Laura's eyes lit up. "And I worried about not getting my favorite snacks any more."

Eric raised a hand. "Uhh, ladies? What's a GobCo? And what's so special about it?"

Laura scoffed. "You're an Order member and don't know what a GobCo is?"

Eric scowled, a move made much more fearsome by his scars. "Yeah, I'm an Order man - for all of six months. I can barely believe I can actually work miracles. So please, enlighten me."

"It's basically a superstore chain run by goblins," Maria patiently explained. "Hence the name. GobCo is short for Goblin Conglomerate or Corporation, depending on who you ask."

"Goblins." Eric tried not to snicker.

"Yes," Doug grumbled. "My mischievous, also green-skinned relatives. I may have forgotten almost everything when I stumbled across the Barrier but the pesky football skulls are rather ubiquitous everywhere, even here."

"And when one enterprising Order member back in the 1880s realized that they were in fact ubiquitous and able to procure almost everything on short notice, she suggested they turn their skills to good use," Maria explained.

"I still don't get it. A goblin supermarket? What are they selling? Eye of Newt and Wing Of Bat?" Eric asked.

"Today? Everything from snacks to spell components to high tech," Laura said, grinning. "I'm pretty sure they are the primary telecom supplier for most of the Order."

"And let's not forget their delivery service," Maria said. "Anything from any other GobCo store can be here within twenty-four hours. Amazon, eat your bloody heart out." She giggled playfully. "Oh, which reminds me, Eric. I got your phone ready. It's properly encrypted and I took the liberty of installing the usual suite of Order apps -- journal, prayer book, monster database et cetera."

"Uh... cool, I guess?" Eric said.

"Do you need mine as well?" Laura asked.

"Just let me have a look at it when you're in the workshop. I'll decide then."

Laura poured herself a glass of water and took a long sip. "I hope you're not planning any big sightseeing tours today. I'm totally beat. Time zones are a bitch."

"We actually didn't expect you for some more days," Jenna said. "I'm amazed you're this early to begin with. How did you get here this fast?"

Laura told about her meeting with Headmaster Aulin after her Graduation and how she ended up in Boston at five in the morning.

"Next time," Jenna said sternly, "just call me directly. I would have jumped in the car and fetched you myself. Taking the bus was the long, long way around." The werebear smiled fondly. "Take all the time you need to catch your breath. How about a little sniffing out tomorrow morning?"

"Sniffing out?" Laura asked, looking from face to face at the table.

Eric rubbed his shoulder, Maria smiled at her and Doug grinned expansively. He said: "What M- Jenna wants is a little one-on-one time in the ring."

"Sure, I'll be happy to oblige, after eight hours of sleep or so." Laura hid a yawn behind her palm.

* * * *

"Pick one," Maria said, "There's plenty of rooms left."

The upper hallway had eight doors, four of which were wide open. Laura took her bag from the landing and picked the first door to the left. A spacious room waited beyond, the far wall one large, tri-panel window overlooking the garden and the dense forest beyond. The bed, a sturdy four-poster made from dark wood and brass decoration, was big enough for two. A wide desk was built into a row of cabinets, a widescreen monitor hinting at some kind of computer or at least entertainment system hidden nearby. Both an armor stand and a weapons rack were in arm's reach from the door. Two chairs and a round table were nestled into the space surrounded by the windows. A narrow side door led somewhere else. Laura gestured towards it. "Bathroom?"

Maria nodded. "Indeed. Adjacent rooms have to share. Lucky you has no neighbor yet so enjoy it while you can."

Laura dropped her bag onto the bed. She pulled a change of clothes from it then fished for her toiletry bag. Many of the jars and tubes within had the eye-watering yellow, orange and green of GobCo's house brand on them. "Oh, believe me, I will. I hope you don't mind the ten minutes it will take."

"I could wash your back," Maria offered, a playful smile on her lips. "Unless you want me to call Doug, that is. He barely let you out of his sight over lunch."

Laura burst out laughing. "Thanks for both offers but I think I'll pass for now. Even if my girlfriend hadn't just broken up with me, I'm way too tired for any mutual exploration." She looked Maria over. The slender half-elf nearly came up to her height but was maybe two-thirds of her weight. Her blouse's angular cut accentuated her shoulders but did a pretty decent job of hiding her breasts while the tight pair of slacks Maria wore outlined her narrow waist and the gentle curve of her butt.

"Well, just call if your back needs some scrubbing," Maria said. "Once you're done, see me below." She blew Laura a kiss and sashayed off.

Laura shook her head and closed the door to her room. I'll never get used to how generous Shadows are with their affection, she thought while undressing.

Between her non-human classmates and even some strangers she had met when back home in Cologne for the holidays, the Shadows were quick to make the first move. Madame Robert, the teacher for Shadow psychology and monster lore, was quick to remind them that Shadows were people too and being invisible to most humans caused some of them to become somewhat desperate when it came to dating.

Over the past two decades, the stance in Briou had changed from 'no sex allowed at all' to 'be responsible, here's how birth control works.' Still, between gender segregation at night and a strictly enforced curfew, the dating game remained an adventure -- unless you happened to end up with your roommate.

Laura inspected the bathroom. Like everything else in the chapter house, it was both brand new and exuded an old-world charm she didn't quite expect. There were both a bathtub and a shower stall, lots of white enamel and brass inlays wherever the eye went. A toiled and bidet and two sinks with enough towel racks to serve half a soccer team. Whoever had designed this bathroom expected both tenants to get along pretty well.

Her phone rang. Laura parked her toiletries on a chest of drawers and dashed back into her bedroom.

"Yes?"

There was embarrassed silence on the other end, then, finally, Victoria spoke. "Hey."

Laura's heart nearly skipped a beat. "You've got fucking nerves," she began. "What the hell were you thinking!?" Her voice rang off the windows.

Vicky exhaled slowly. "I think I deserved the verbal slap you just gave me, huh?"

"If I could, I'd crawl through the connection and spank you silly, you stupid pointy-eared idiot!" Laura hissed. "Why?"

"I... I thought it would be better if you'd be mad at me instead of sad and lonely," Vicky muttered. "Where are you? What are you doing?"

"Well, I'm mad at you for pissing off like that. And I'm sad because I thought I mean enough to you that you'd let me kiss you goodbye. Stupid romantic shit like that," Laura fumed. "Why call now?"

There was a soft sob at the other end. "I miss you, sweet boobs. A lot. I mean, how long...?"

Laura checked the display and did some mental gymnastics. "Don't tell me you're in bed, naked, touching yourself and being all mushy-gushy for me right now. Eight hours or so."

There was a soft moan on the other end. "You know me too well, El." Soft rustling of fabric. "Also, your mom called me and gave me a tongue lashing I'll probably never forget."

Laura moaned. "I told her not to get involved." She crashed onto the bed. "If you have to know, I'm in the midst of a particularly Lovecraftian province nest in Massachusetts, naked on my bed. And, for your information, a very cute half-elven sorceress wanted into my pants."

"Oh." Vicky sounded much less horny all of a sudden. "How did it go?"

Laura grinned deviously. "By all rights I should tell you about how she seduced me under the shower and how her nimble fingers drove me to heights you never could before we ended up in my fantastic four-poster bed, eating each other out until I fell unconscious." She listened. "Are you seriously fucking yourself now?"

"Hmmm, tell me mo-... what?" The soft, sopping sounds stopped abruptly.

"You're impossible! I haven't even said I'd forgive you, you coal-skinned slut!" Laura snarled, trying to keep a straight face. Relief washed over her in waves, despite the knot of anger in her insides. "Also, I said 'by all rights' and all that. I sent her away. I'm fighting an ungodly amount of teleport lag on top of the lack of sleep you are responsible for. The last thing on my mind is sex, seriously."

More rustling of fabric then Victoria's voice came again, much more coherent and sober. "How can I apologize?"

Laura sighed. "I don't know. I'd love to kick your ass six days to Sunday in the sparring circle but considering how difficult teleportation to and from Greenbury is... you've just earned yourself a stay of execution, until I manage to slip this joint for a week or two."

"What are we going to do in the meantime then?" Vicky asked. "Long-distance relationships suck, even with video calls. You do have internet, don't you?"

"You know we have more between us than just sex, don't you?" Laura asked, walking over to the desk and flipping open doors at random. She soon found a serious-looking desktop PC stashed away in one of the cabinets, with mouse and keyboard hidden in a drawer under the desk top. "If you'd been just a sexy piece of ass and there had been nothing but-"

"The butt?"

"The sex, you moron. If there had been nothing but sex between us, I think I would have taken your sudden radio silence much better. But the girl who was all about being open, being honest and being my shoulder to cry on just ghosting me, that hurt like a Sewer Horror's tentacle across my face."

"I think I understand." Vicky was quiet for a time. "I'm truly sorry. I panicked." Another pause. "You know, for all my posturing..."

"I was your first real girlfriend, huh?"

"Uh-huh."

"I'd never have guessed. Not after what you did with Thorin and Marox in the Flaming City."

"Admit it, you got a huge kick out of watching me being spitroasted by those two. I told you, you should have taken the Djinn waiter who was giving you those scorching looks up to our room as well."

"I was drunk enough to enjoy your antics, yes. But I don't think I could just fuck around, even with your blessing."

Vicky laughed softly. "Then you haven't found the right temptation yet. Just to be extra-clear -- I expect you to get all the steamy sex you need while over there. No guilty conscience. Fuck your overthinking, German brain out. I dare you. And when we meet next time, I want all the dirty details."

"I know you'll do whatever the heck you want anyway," Laura said. "I only want one promise from you: Never, ever, ghost me again. Please. I could go celibate in a heartbeat, as long as I know my best friend is there for me when I need her."

"You'll never go celibate!" Vicky protested. "You love the horizontal tango way too much."

"Watch me," Laura threatened. "Or maybe I'll forsake the feminine wiles completely and have myself a tasty half-orc for a change. There's that hunk of a paladin working with me. I bet he's hung like a horse and itching for some delicious me."

"Like I said, go hog wild. Just let me know how it went, okay?" Vicky turned sober again. "And by my honor as second daughter of House Hralvin, I shall promise my phone will forever be in arm's reach, even if a Roper is fucking every single one of my orifices."

"You are so nasty sometimes!" Laura wiped tears of laughter from her eyes. "It's only been eight hours without you, but I've missed you so much."

"Me too," Vicky whispered. "And please, could you tell your mom to not cast that frigidity curse on me?"

* * * *

Eric had been right. The moment Laura passed the concealed door leading into the chapter house's lower basement, the surroundings reminded her of something seen in a Bond villain lair, or something hidden under the X-Mansion. The walls were paneled with dark marble, each panel decorated with a tall brushed steel rectangle, ready to accept trophies or other decorations. The light panels above produced a curious hue, somewhere between pure white and something approximating daylight. There was no shadow anywhere, only her reflections in the pristine marble slates. Doors were made out of metal and every single one was emblazoned with the Order's blue-tinged silver cross. Hand-sized OLED screens next to each door announced each room's function.

The door to the Armory hissed open as Laura approached. The room beyond was a curious cross between workshop, storage area and, of all things, an operating theater, with a central, brightly illuminated workbench. Maria waited behind a counter, her formal clothing exchanged for a low-necked T-shirt and comfortable pants. She had tied her mane into a simple ponytail.

"You look better," she observed, offering Laura a warm smile and a peek down her front as she leaned on the counter. She wore no bra.

"A long, hot shower can work wonders," Laura said, joining the half-elf at the counter. "As does a long heart-to-heart with my once-again girlfriend."

"And here I was, hoping I could staple your mangled heart back together with some exotic gear and decades of experience between the sheets," Maria joked.

"I'll happily take the gear," Laura purred, leaning closer.

"And?" Maria murmured, coming closer as well until their noses almost touched.

Laura bridged the last inch or so and breathed a gentle kiss onto Maria's lips. "Victoria Hralvin says hi," she said softly. "And consider this a down payment for later, once we know each other a little better."

"Hmmm," Maria said, pulling herself upright again. "That was a nice bit of Briou diplomacy. I agree to your terms."

"I had the best teacher," Laura said. She didn't expect Maria's lips to taste like cherries. "Down to brass tacks then. I need gear and I need answers."

Maria pursed her lips in a cute pout. "So it's true what they say about humans. Always business, no pleasure. And I'm trying so hard to be sociable," the half-elf complained.

"Don't try to pretend you're not fifty percent human yourself," Laura said, wagging a finger at her.

"I spent most of my early years among my elven mother's kin then I ended up in Briou. We both know it's the last place to learn proper human behavior. I had to wait until Die Schwarze Akademie to get in touch with my human side." Maria shrugged. "Two can play at being professionals. So, what's first? Gear or answers?"

"Answers." Laura quickly explained how her graduation match with Arach had ended. "Vicky says it's impossible to interrupt a dark elf's power, my mom laughs at the thought. Who is right?"

"Both," Maria said, grinning. "Under normal circumstances, it is very hard to break a dark elf's concentration. Nothing short of sleep or unconsciousness would do. But-!" She raised a hand to ward off Laura's interjection. "That only applies to non-magical interruptions. The moment magic, or especially anti-magic, is involved, we are looking at a much more complex set of possibilities."

"I have no magic," Laura said. "All my aptitude tests came back blank. My classmate Carlos can use wands! And he's not even a sorcerer!"

"You had the mandatory Magic 101, I presume?" Maria fished a narrow box out from under the counter.

"Yeah. Total waste of my time. I mean, I can now read a bit of Draconic and know my pentagrams from my banishing sigils, but-"

"Here, take this," Maria said, holding the box open. Inside was a polished wand made from a pale wood.

Laura picked up the item. It tingled between her fingers as she turned it this way and that. "The runes say 'Light.' What-"

"Use it. You know how."

"You really want to waste our time, huh? Is that your idea of punishing me for not showering together?"

"Please, indulge me. And no, I would never be that petty. We barely met and I can wait a few weeks, months or years until you allow me to seduce you."

Laura sighed. "Okay then. I am a sorcerer. The wand works for me. I am a sorcerer." She held the wand at arm's length and repeated the words over and over again. According to Mr. Coronaius, using magical items as a non-sorcerer required a lot of willpower, tricking the item into working with the wielder instead of against them. Laura gnashed her teeth. By now, the wand trembled between her fingers.

"Enough. Relax please," Maria said, touching her shoulder.

Laura opened her eyes. There was no globe of daylight hovering in front of her, despite beads of sweat on her forehead and a fierce cramp in her wrist. She dropped the wand on the counter and shook out her hand. "Told you."