Rotten To The Core

Maria picked up the wand and made a gesture with her free hand. Her eyes took on a strange, otherworldly glow as she inspected the item. "Hm."

"Hm what? That's not really helping," Laura grumbled.

"Hm like in 'Hm, this is interesting.' The wand was freshly made and should be fully charged." Maria looked up, the strange glow dissipating. "I see no changes, neither in the amount of charges or the type of enchantment stored."

Laura shrugged. "That's how it's always been for me. The only magical items which work for me are those carrying permanent enchants and potions. I feel kinda stupid not being able to even coax some light from a wand, considering my parents."

"That's odd indeed. Camilla was very impressive when I met her a few years ago, during her stint as a guest teacher at the Akademie. And your father is a Paladin?"

"Fully anointed Knight Hospitalier. Throws Holy Smites left and right when wading into battle. Or used his Lay On Hands to fix every little bruise I got when I learned how to ride a bike." Laura smiled fondly.

"You love your parents."

"You don't?"

"It's... difficult. My mother can be horribly irritating at times, always so detached and precise when doing even the most simple things. And my father is way too energetic even for me. We butted heads a lot, all three of us." Maria shook her head. "Back to the matter at hand. Besides managing to slam Arach out of her Levitation, can you remember any other strange interactions with magic items or spells? Be as precise as you can, every little detail might be a clue to your condition."

"It's a condition now?" Laura sighed. "I'm not sure... oh, wait. I do remember something. Last year we had our big planar excursion."

"Oh, fun times. I remember mine all too well. My team and I got the short straw and spent two weeks in Limbo. We had to take turns imagining solid ground beneath our feet or tumble through the Void Of Potentials for all eternity. Not my idea of fun."

Laura giggled. "And I thought we had it rough. I was teamed up with Vicky-"

"Your girlfriend?"

"Uh-huh, her. Also with us were Marox, a huge half-orc barbarian from Russia and Thorin, a dwarven mage from Sweden. We drew The Flaming City from the hat. At that time I thought someone had rigged the lottery because there's an Order outpost in the City but our two weeks there were... taxing."

"If I remember correctly, The Flaming City is infamous for its night life, isn't it?" Maria's grin turned naughty.

"Things did get out of hand on occasion. But Sharazel, the local Order contact, heaped so many quests on us, we barely had time to let our hair down. One such quest was the eradication of some Fire Elementals who were terrorizing a brass smelter on the edge of town. I was fighting off three of the buggers when a fourth threw a Fireball at me from behind. Instead of toasting me, I only lost a few singed hairs. Vicky said the elemental missed because he was entranced by my cute ass but I'm pretty sure that was her hormones talking."

"Interesting. You didn't even react consciously?"

"I didn't even notice the attack until the Fireball blew up around me, ironically healing those elementals close by."

"How do you deal with tests of your abilities in general?"

Laura shrugged. "I prepare so much beforehand, the test itself usually is just a formality."

"And when the aptitude tests came around? Did you feel nervous?"

"No, not at all. Dejected, down in the dumps. While all around me my classmates made pebbles spin or glow stones light up, I could only sit, sweat and marvel as my test objects remained dormant." Laura suddenly yawned. "Sorry."

"No, no. I should be sorry for keeping you up this long." Maria said. "I'll ask around the Akademie. Maybe someone in the fringe fields of magic theory has heard about a case like yours. You can't be unique in all of creation. The place is chock full of Earth's most innovative magic users. And a centuries-old library."

"And a secret cabal of necromancers." Laura added dryly. "I hope you're not into undead. That would totally ruin your chances with me."

"If there was a secret cabal of rot-mongers, outsiders wouldn't know about it. If anything, Die Schwarze Akademie is absurdly protective of its secrets." Maria rubbed her hands. "What's your stance on sorcerers or magic users in general?"

"Arach's advice in regards to spell-slingers was 'A headshot a day keeps Fireballs away.' I kinda like that approach."

"Yikes. Remind me to never get on your bad side. Fine. We'll talk more once I have done some research into latent magical abilities. Until then, how about I show you what kind of gear I made?"

"By all means. I don't know how much longer I can keep standing. Didn't get much sleep last night and then there's the little issue with being five hours past my original time." Laura fought a yawn and lost.

"Okay, let's make it quick then." She fetched a palm-sized box from a shelf behind her and placed it on the counter. "Your armor."

Laura inspected the box. "Let me guess. Chain mail bikini."

"Oh, I'd love to see you wear one," Maria purred, shaking her head. "Folding composite armor. High protection, almost no negative impact on your agility. Try it on. For me, please?"

"How can I withstand those beautiful puppy dog eyes of yours?" Laura said, opening the box. Inside was a slender metal bracer.

"Puppy dog? I have to protest. My eyes are cat-like, if you have to saddle me with animal analogies!" Maria sputtered while Laura examined the bracelet. It was made from some alloy, polished to a mirror sheen and adorned with a simple, yet elegant engraving not unlike some interwoven hexagonal scales.

"Stop bitching and tell me the command word, please."

"Fine, fine. It's 'clypeus.'"

"Not 'armis?'"

"No, 'clypeus,' to make sure you won't utter anything similar by mistake. 'Armis,' although the correct word for 'armor,' sounds much too similar to 'arms.' I've had enough trouble with my Alexa recently and magic items are even more finicky when it comes to activation phrases. Thus I picked the Latin word for 'shield' instead of 'armor.' Less chance of an accidental misfire."

"I... never thought about that," Laura admitted, sliding the bracer onto her wrist. "Do I need to be naked or wear special padding underneath to activate this thing?"

"No, it's all built in. Just say the word and be amazed. Oh, and it helps if you keep your arms slightly off to the side," Maria cautioned.

"Here goes. Clypeus!"

The bracer vibrated around Laura's wrist. Then, small scales seemed to sprout from it. They multiplied a hundredfold in the blink of an eye, racing up her arm and down her fingers. A moment later, they settled on her shoulders. Like a dull gray tide, they poured down her breasts and back but instead of clattering to the floor, they snaked down her body in ever-elongating tendrils, seeking each other and fusing into one unbroken sheath of softly hissing metal. The whole process took less than five seconds. A moment later, parts of the armor around her forearms, chest, thighs and calves seemed to ripple and flow, turning into solid, curved metal plates offering extra protection. Laura took a few tentative steps, amazed at how light and evenly distributed the armor felt. There was no undue rattling; whatever construction and padding was used, there was only a gentle rustle whenever Laura moved.

"There are two distinct disadvantages to your Folding Armor," Maria said behind her. "First, there's no helmet included yet. It would require some lengthy fine tuning of the enchantment to get your head measurements properly implemented. Despite my best efforts, nobody in Briou wanted to part with your medical record. Also, no built-in boots. I haven't found a way to slip a sole between your feet and the ground yet aside from adding both a levitation spell and about twenty more seconds to the whole transformation. Makes it all way too unwieldy. My advice? There's a Dwarven shoemaker on Dickens Road who makes fantastic custom footwear. He should be able to make combat boots to go with your armor."

Laura snickered. "Well, as a bonding exercise, us girls should do a little shopping anyway. Let's mix business and pleasure. Clypeus!"

Her armor disintegrated and collapsed back on itself, leaving her feeling unnaturally light for a moment.

"A third, obvious issue," Maria added. "The moment you're hit with a Disjunction Stone or Dispel Magic, you're down to the clothes on your back."

"I'm fairly certain that's not going to happen that often. I'll take the risk over having to wear twenty-five pounds of chain mail everywhere I go."

"Just so you are aware." Maria crossed the room and pulled two items from wall mounts. The first one was a bastard sword in a simple but well-made scabbard, the grip wound with silver wire and the pommel ending in the Order's blue-tinged cross. The second was a thigh holster with a handgun grip jutting from it.

"Alright, here you are," Maria said, placing both on the counter.

Laura picked up the handgun and drew it from it's holster. "That's no Hell Spitter," she said, mild disappointment in her voice.

"Duh." Maria threw up her hands. "The Order may have pretty much carte blanche in Europe as far as weapons go but somehow most of the cleverly placed loopholes got left behind when the Founding Fathers buggered off across the ocean. So we need to dance around local law enforcement. I know it's not a Hell Spitter. People around here get nervous when someone runs around with what amounts to a drum-fed combat shotgun crossbred with a grenade launcher. I tried to come up with a worthy replacement."

Laura turned the gun this way and that. It was well built, she had to admit. The finish was stainless steel, the grip felt as if it had been made just for her and everything just oozed masterwork construction. "Looks like a Colt 1911 derivative to me. A very well built one." She dropped the magazine. "Seven shots? And no tingle in my fingers. It's not enchanted?"

"Don't be so disappointed and look closer. I shamelessly stole the feature list off a Kimber Custom. You have night sights, an adjustable trigger, a beveled magazine well for easier reloading and, most important of all, I changed the caliber to 10mm for a bit more punch. And if lucky seven rounds isn't enough, I do have a few ten shot mags on hand. They do mess with concealed carry though."

"This'll have to do until my Hell Spitter arrives. Thank you." Laura said, attaching the holster to her belt. "What kind of ammo do you have?"

"A few essentials. Silver, cold-forged iron and multi-purpose hollow point. Give me enough advance warning and I can load them up with silver nitrate, garlic and wood slivers or grave dust, whatever you need."

"That will do. I'll miss my rubber bullets and Holy Water grenades though."

"Can't win them all. I could whip up a few throwables though. Oh, and before I forget - you'll have to visit our local contact at the GPD to get your paperwork finalized before you're allowed to take the gun outside," Maria cautioned her.

"We have a contact with the cops?"

"Yup, and a cute one at that. She knew who we were the moment she saw Jenna's bus."

"That's a first. Most people need a long explanation about the Order and why we exist, who Zakharius was and all that."

"Not Kelly. She wasn't too thorough with the details but her grandmother must have met some Order folks before she fled Europe during the War."

"How much does this Kelly know?"

"Not much. I'm pretty sure she can't see Doug or me for what we really are yet." Maria sighed. "And she's not into girls. Couldn't stop drooling about our Pally."

"At least she's sympathetic to our cause. Right?"

"Thus far, yes. I got my FID card no problem and you should too. Just mention the Inquisitorial Appendix of 1692 and how you need your weapons for your church work."

"And that's enough? No questions about why a young volunteer needs a blade and handgun?"

"There will be sighing and eye rolling but by now they've done it four times already, once more shouldn't be an issue."

"Fantastic." Laura picked up the sword and drew it. The blade was of the finest workmanship, nicely tapered and with a beautiful edge. She made a few test swipes. The weapon seemed to anticipate each of her moves with unnatural eagerness and was very agile and nimble.

"Not bad," Laura said, sheathing the weapon again. "What's the enchantment?"

"I'm afraid it's just a general enhancement. You know, sharper, better, quicker. Impossible to break. Like a Moon Maiden pattern, but better."

"Thank you."

"I know, I know, it's not a Flame Tongue," Maria said. "But look at it this way -- you don't have to worry about elemental immunities with it."

"I'm not complaining," Laura said, adding the scabbard to her other hip. "You could enchant it further, given enough time."

"And the right materials of course," Maria said, smiling fondly. "Permanent spells like these eat up reagents like ghouls-... No, better not finish that thought."

Laura chuckled. "No, better no ghoul jokes around here." She pulled her phone from its pocket and slid it across the counter. "PIN is 2002-20-02. I would appreciate it if you didn't go into my private folder."

"That's both an interesting date and way too easy to crack," Maria said. "Your birthday?"

Laura shook her head. "The day my parents were wed. I was a bit earlier than that."

Maria checked the phone. "No need to dig through your pictures. You're running G-OS 6.66 with the most current Order plug-ins." She handed the phone back. "If you want more advice -- change your PIN."

"Yeah, I might do that." Laura said around another yawn. "Anything else? My bed is calling me."

"Well, before you go..." Maria ducked underneath the counter and rummaged in a few boxes. When she surfaced, she had a belt in her hands from which several items and pouches dangled. Laura saw a GobCo branded set of lockpicks next to a small metal hip flask with the Order cross stamped in, along with a few capsule-like containers she couldn't make heads or tails of.

"I'm working on a standardized tool belt for the Order," Maria explained. "Has most of the essentials any Order member might need, including a few easy-to-create magical items, like permanent Light pebbles."

"Aren't they more expensive than a simple flashlight?"

"Flashlights use batteries. Batteries cost money. If treated properly, one of my pebbles lasts for centuries and can be passed down from teacher to pupil. In the end, I'd be saving the order a lot of money."

"Not bad, not bad," Laura said. "What's the catch?"

"There's one issue with the belt I haven't been able to fix," Maria said, placing it on the counter, "It's incompatible with my Folding Armor."

"Incompatible how?" Laura asked.

"When you wear it before you activate the armor, it's inside the armor like everything else you're wearing at the time. I've tried and tried but the Folding enchantment has yet to recognize items to wear above the armor."

"If all else fails, how about manually donning the belt once the armor is in place?" Laura suggested.

"But... that's impractical," Maria sputtered. "Anyway, you want one?"

"I'll take the Healing potion and a crowbar. If you can source me a long coat, I think we should be golden."

"You know it's June. In Massachusetts. On really hot days, we have almost 30° Celsius outside. No one runs around in long trenchcoats in that kind of weather."

"Well, shorts, flip-flops, a sword and fully loaded tool belt won't raise eyebrows either, will they?" Laura chuckled amicably. "Until we find a better solution, how about tossing all of the utility items into a backpack? Putting it down and replacing it just takes a moment, folding armor or not. As long as I can grab my healing potion in a pinch, everything else is a bonus."

"Fine, fine, have your potion then." Maria unclipped the hip flask and handed it to Laura, along with a few boxes of ammo and spare magazines. "That probably means 'good night' for now, doesn't it?"

Laura collected her gear, fighting another yawn. "Not just probably, Maria darling. Good night. And again, thank you."

* * * *

Despite being deathly tired, sleep refused to claim Laura. The unfamiliar sounds of the chapter house and her own turbulent thoughts and emotions kept her awake.

She had trained for over a decade to be a flexible, adaptable and strong-willed fighter, neither afraid of man, Shadow or mythical critter. But now, in the twilight of her new bedroom, inhaling the scent of an unfamiliar detergent and required to embrace so many new people, rest didn't come.

Jenna and Doug were like an old couple, despite their short time together. She was the fiercely protective alpha of the pack while he tolerated her posturing with a chuckle and a nudge of his elbow. He also somehow reminded her of home, of her father. Maybe both being paladins and radiating some soothing aura.

Maria was... interesting. There was no denying she was much too smart for her own good but behind the aloof half-elven facade was a likable young woman desperately seeking her place in the world.

Eric was the hardest to understand thus far. His face could scare people senseless but he seemed to be a good guy at heart. I need to learn about his background, what makes him tick. The last thing I need is my healer losing his shit in a tight spot, Laura thought. He and I need to have a long talk. I have to be able to blindly trust the person who's keeping me alive.

After tossing and turning for a few more moments, Laura reached for the nightstand and picked up her phone. Vicky had sent a few nudes of herself, lovingly self-censored with Rolling Stone tongues on her breasts and pussy. A big 'wish you were here' slogan wound along her outstretched leg, with a little arrow after 'here' pointing between Vicky's thighs.

Softly giggling, Laura checked the time. Even a nighttime bird like Vicky would be fast asleep by now. I'd love to talk to her but waking her would be horribly selfish. Laura lowered her phone and sighed. Now what? She paged through her Netflix library but there was nothing which caught her eye. She flicked through her image folders, trying to conjure up fond memories of Briou. To her surprise, most of her pics were shot in the last two years, when she had crawled out of her shell somewhat. Much less surprising was how often Vicky was in the shot. The eight years beforehand mostly showed stills of the Armory and the deterioration of her training gear.

Inspiration struck eventually. I did have a surefire way to calm down, before Vicky and I fell asleep in each other's arms, Laura thought, opening her phone's app folder. She pulled up an e-reader, fed it "The History of The Order Of Martinius" and activated the text-to-speech function. A convincing imitation of Coronaius' soothing tones began to read the long, meandering story of her ancestors.

"In the year 474, in the dying days of the Roman Empire, deranged nobles summoned an entity from another realm. They intended to bring forth a pleasure demon, to elevate their orgies to a whole new level of debauchery. What they got instead was much, much worse. The fallen angel Zakharius swept in. His arrival tore a gaping hole into the boundary between worlds and in his wake came all kinds of visitors, some benign, but most possessed of a vicious nature. All the chaos, worldly and otherworldly, hastened the demise of the beleaguered Roman Empire. Led by a humble priest named Martinius, a few valiant souls tried to stop the inevitable and with divine assistance, they even managed to banish the fallen angel back into his hellish prison where he rots to this day. The titanic forces unleashed in the ritual to overpower Zakharius tore massive gashes into our world's magical field and led to a drought of mystical energy which can still be felt today.