Rudra and Riya Ch. 09

Chapter- 9

"Riya, wake up baby." He was crouching next to me.

When I got my bearings I could only whisper, "Don't leave me." My chin trembled. In my chest I felt like my heart was going to implode and I cringed so I would stop feeling the pain.

When I woke again, he was holding me in his arms.

"Please, I'm sorry," I barely spoke.

"Its okay," he gently rocked me in his arms but would not hold my gaze. My heart sank and I wanted to die than watch him drift away from me again.

"I'm sorry..." I began to sob, tears of guilt and regret of what I had put him through gushing down my cheeks.

"Stop it Riya...plz, I beg you...stop torturing me...I can't even be mad at you now?"

"Be angry with me, berate me, hit me but don't leave me plz...I'm sorry." I began to wail.

"I can't leave you...even if that's what I feel like doing right now." He clenched his jaw, but his expression eased when he saw the shock register on my face.

My breath stuck in my throat. I closed my eyes and tried to swallow, feeling the cold spread from the tips of my fingers to my heart. My lips drooped. I wish I had died back then. Did he feel stuck with me? The agony of it was beyond bearable. I hit my chest as hard as I could so I could stop feeling the agony I was in.

"What the fuck are you doing?" He barked and held my hand in a vice like grip and glared at me. "Are you mad? I can't even be angry with you now?"

My lips began to droop again as warm tears flowed down from my cheeks. "You're not angry...you're stuck with me?" My chin trembled.

"You are a fucking idiot, Riya and if you hadn't been sick I would've bashed some sense into you...God..." he cursed.

"Am sorry...I..." "I...I was scared that you might find someone else when I couldn't satisfy you anymore...and I couldn't bare that...I didn't know I couldn't bare anyone getting close to you...not even ma...I am sorry...please forgive me for what I've done to you both... please, am sorry, you were mine as much as you were hers and I stole you from her..." I howled in shame.

He shook his head like fighting some demons in his head. " Shh...quiet now...stop crying...come and lie in bed...you need to rest..."

"Please,... please Rudra..." I begged.

He shook his head again. "I never knew you had such a low opinion of me, that I'd go sleep with random women, like a fucking animal, just cuz my own wife was in no condition to sleep with me cuz she was pregnant." He ended in suppressed rage.

I felt prickles all over hearing that. I had never thought of it that way. But I knew if I didn't do anything immediate, the situation would escalate beyond repair.

"I will make amends." I folded my hands in submission begging him to forgive me. "I love you..." my chin trembled and my eyes welled with warm tears. "I will make amends...I will atone myself...plz give me a chance...don't leave me...please, I'm begging you."

"There's nothing to forgive..."

I could not comprehend this expression in his eyes... cuz I had never seen it there before. They looked at me like they were looking at a stranger.

I felt weak and closed my eyes. I would rather die than see him look at me like that. My head began to spin.

"Riya...?" He shook me. "Breathe dammit what are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? Riya?" He snapped half mad half scared. "Stop it Riya."

He drew me into his embrace close to his heart. "What are you doing, Riya? Open your eyes? Am scared dammit."

My lips drooped. "You're going to leave me, am going to die," I whispered.

"Nobody's leaving anyone you damn fool." He said under his breath lifting me into bed.

I began to tremble.

"Breathe honey...please..."

That simple endearment made the difference between life and death. Did he not know the power he had over me?

*****

A few days later, after things had become normal between Rudra and myself was I finally able to call ma to check on the children. Vansh was having the worst case of chicken pox and it worried me no end. I begged Rudra to visit home the next day to check on him and help ma out with taking care of the babies. He stared at me but reluctantly submitted when I told him I'd visit him myself if he didn't go. When he came home he looked for some tell tale signs of jealousy but when he didn't find any he was able to calm down. Gradually he began to visit home on a regular basis.

Just the thought that he was there with the children gave me enough peace to recover. Every evening we made a point to chat over the cam and be a family again, no matter whether Rudra was with me or back home with the children. Slowly but steadily we began to get past the misfortune and bond again as a family.

Baby Joel needed to be fed and I watched him with a sadness that words could not explain. But watching ma feed him on her enormous breasts made the thought a bit bearable that he was in good hands. I watched in a trance and wondered what Rudra went through when he saw Joel suck on that long hard tit. The diamond ring caught the light and twinkled like a halo around her nipple and my mouth watered. It was the peak of the monsoon season and sweat made her clothes stick to her. I was surprised to notice that over the few months ma had developed into a rather shapely woman. Gone was the bulge around her waist and her hips looked quite toned. I wondered how Rudra kept his hands off her. I had even witnessed Dr Sid throw many appreciative glances in her direction when he was around to check over the children. Ma seemed to enjoy the attention as well. I smiled. She seemed happy.

Coming to the present my focus drifted to Rudra, who was apparently, having a tea party with Yukti, but really watching ma feed Joel from the corner of his eye. A tiny throb rippled through my pussy. I was baffled with the way my body and my emotions reacted to their possible union. They were at loggerheads with each other and it was so frustrating specially because I found myself wanting Rudra like never before.

This time when Rudra got home he barely waited for the nurse to leave and pounced like a hungry wolf on my breasts and suckled and bit and chewed on them until they were enflamed and my pussy throbbed with the need to feel him inside me. But even after I begged him to take me, he just wouldn't and left me all the more frustrated and angry. In my rage I called him names but he only laughed, " You deserve this and more for all your plotting and scheming."

My cheeks flushed in embarrassment and anger.

He was never going to let it go. "I don't want you," I spat. He had made a habit of making me pay for it.

"Shhh, calm down," he forcibly hugged me until I simmered. "Just a few more days then you can have your way with me." He gave me a peck on the nose and left for the shower where I heard and watched him tackle his hard-on.

Two minutes in bed and he was hard again. He sighed tiredly and invariably my hand travelled to his erect penis.

"Riya," he whispered and his hand came to hold mine, only he didn't move me away.

It was wonderful to feel his warm, throbbing cock in my hand again. I wanted to so feel it inside me. I wanted to suck it and feel it rest against my throat. I wanted him so much right now that my heart began to pound in my chest. I held him in my fist and slowly began to yank him. Rudra released a long sigh. I pressed a kiss on his neck and tightened my hold around his cock. I continued to kiss and bite his neck until I felt him cum all over my hand.

"Did you like that?" I asked him while he panted.

"Hmmm," he said out of breath.

Now I was happy even if still a little horny.

During the day I would see ma bare her gorgeous breasts and feed our babies while Rudra watched her without inhibition and in the evening when he got home, my breasts got the burnt end of it. Then as usual he'd get into the shower, wash, come to bed and then in the night when he got hard I'd give him a hand job. Only he began to get an erection a bit too frequently. Maybe he was getting frustrated too, only he was too good at hiding it but apparently his body wasn't.

One night I had the most vivid dream. Instead of my breasts he was suckling on ma's long hard tit. The ring around her nipple clinked when his teeth brushed against it. I saw the two slim chains extending down from both her nipple rings to the metal ring over her belly button. A third chain extended from it and went down to connect to the piercing on her clitoris. I was still marveling at this spectacle when I saw Rudra push his finger into ma's belly ring. He moved his finger in her belly button then pulled the ring to himself so that now both her tits and her clit were jutting out. Rudra moaned deep down in his throat and I felt my pussy flood with desire. It was amazing how watching them both still got me horny.

"Riya?" "Riya...?" "Wake up honey. Are you all right?" He asked in a whisper.

I woke with a start.

"Shh, shhh calm down baby. Is everything okay?" He asked again.

"What?" I asked bemusedly.

"You were moaning in your sleep. Are you feeling all right?"

All the time I thought it was Rudra but it was I who had been moaning in my sleep. Tears stung my eyes and all my frustrations came pouring forth. "I want you Rudra and if I can't have you I need to watch you have me."

"What?" He sounded thoroughly confused.

"I want you Rudra, but if I can't have sex with you because of my stupid heart..." I punched my chest in rage.

"What are you doing?" He bellowed and held my hand.

"I... I need to watch you having sex..." my voice trailed off.

His face registered a shock, then changed to confusion."Sleep. We'll talk about it in the morning." He pecked my forehead to console me and gently pulled me into his arms.

"We were supposed to talk," I reminded him over breakfast. I'd waited long enough.

He looked at me over the newspaper. "Yes,...we're supposed to talk sense, not from the back of our heads about things we know nothing about. Now eat your breakfast."

I felt livid. Rage coursed through my veins like hell fire. I was just about to spit out something unholy when he read my face and added.

"Just a few months then i'll make all this wait, worth your while." He looked at me, then went back to reading his paper.

A few months, I didn't know if I would last that long. But I reckoned he'd forgiven me a lot and maybe this was my penance.

I nodded and resigned to eating my breakfast in silence.

That evening he did not go home at all. In the evening we chatted with ma and the kids over the cam and were surprised to find Dr Sid still being there late in the evening.

"Dr, you're still here?" I blurted before thinking it might sound rude after all he was doing for us. But ma stepped in and saved me the embarrassment.

"I asked Sid to stay, it does get lonely here sometimes and so I thought I'd have some company over dinner," she smiled at Sid and he lifted and kissed her hand.

"It's always a pleasure Neela."

It was strange hearing ma being called by her name that too, by someone younger than Rudra. But ma didn't seem to mind and so it didn't bother me either.

Over the conversation ma mentioned that Dr Sid had been helping her with posture and exercises to treat her back. I didn't even know she was suffering from a bad back. I felt ashamed.

"That's good to hear ma, I wish you'd told us. We've been so preoccupied lately that we haven't even asked how you're doing. I'm sorry ma." I meant that from the core of my heart.

Ma brushed it aside. "Its just a bad back, nothing serious and nothing to worry about. Don't worry yourself about it now."

"Thank you Dr, for taking care of her." I joined my hands in gratitude.

"I'm glad I could help." He put his arm over ma's shoulder.

That evening Rudra was very quiet. He didn't maul my breasts like he usually did when he'd visited ma during the day. Somehow I knew now that watching ma, worked him into a frenzy.

"Rudra, I feel so bad." I started, but he did not join in.

He was still quiet.

"Ma has been doing so much for us and we didn't even know that she wasn't feeling well."

"Hmmm." That's all he said and I found that rather strange. "Lets go to sleep, I have to go to work tomorrow for a while."

Maybe that's where his mind was then.

I nodded against his chest and let him go to sleep. But my mind still kept going to ma. That next afternoon I decided to talk to ma so I switched on the camera and began to wait for ma to come into the nursery. I felt I should spend more time with her if I could not be there in person, at least I should give her company.

She walked in and I smiled. She looked good. Dressed in a peacock green suit she had it tailored to perfection. It accentuated her figure in all the right places. She had her hair up in a bun and a string of iridescent pearls sat around her neck. She somehow looked delicate with a strange glow to her face.

I was just about to talk, to let her know of my presence when in walked Dr Sid. I faltered for a fraction of a second then watched in surprise.

Ma was leaning over the baby and trying to soothe him in the crib. Sid came to stand behind her and casually slipped his palms under ma's arms to fare and square cup her breasts. I couldn't see ma for her face was turned down towards the baby. I breathed in sharply as I froze and the very next moment ma rose and turned around to face Dr Sid.

"Dr Sid," she said in a fairly pitched voice, like she'd come upon something exciting. "I understand what you mean now. This time when I leaned to lift the baby my back did not hurt as much."

For a fraction of a moment the doctor faltered then began. "Neela, which is why I keep telling you that added to your posture it's the weight of your breasts that's leading to your back problem. An additional reason might even be that they're even fuller since you're still lactating." He cupped her breast, clinically touching and feeling it all over then lifting and dropping it just to be sure, his doctors eyes focused entirely on the subject at hand.

"Okay tell me something now," he drew even closer to ma until he was almost leaning into ma, pulled her against his chest, pushing his palms to the middle of her back. He started at her nape slowly applying pressure along her vertebra.

"Does it hurt here?"

"No."

The query continued until he reached behind her breasts.

That is when she almost shrieked.

"Here, it hurts here."

"Maybe I'll give you a massage before I leave in the evening. But I'm sure now, it's the weight of the breasts." He eyed her breasts but did not touch them again.

"How long will it take for Vansh to recover? It's becoming extremely hard for me to keep him on bottle, he hates it and throws a tantrum every time he can't suckle. He hates being quarantined as well and I have a hard time taking care of all of them."

"Just a few more days and the scars will have disappeared completely. Only then introduce him back into this room."

"Okay Sid, thank you so much for your help," she smiled at him and her face looked a decade younger. Losing weight did make a person look younger. Ma on the other hand had lost so much weight she looked like an actress from yore.

I thought this was the right time to talk. "Ma," I spoke and she turned around to switch on her screen.

"Hello Riya how are you feeling today?" She asked. We started to talk then.

Dr Sid was about to leave, and I suddenly remembered he was supposed to give ma a massage before he left. I didn't want her to lose out on it because of me, so I pretended I was tired myself and needed to rest as well. On that note I switched off the screen and in a while heard ma and Sid walk downstairs. Ma needed to see to Vansh who was in a makeshift nursery in her room. Maybe that's where she would take the massage too.

Rudra returned late at night. He seemed really tired, the work at the office had suffered in his absence and to make matters worse he had lost a very important client in the process. I felt responsible. He refused to have dinner and got into the shower. He had, had to have dinner with a client. I wondered whether he was mad at me, he didn't even look at me. Dejectedly I crawled into bed and began to wait for him. I felt restless.

I'd closed my eyes so when he got into bed he whispered if I was asleep.

"How are you?" He asked and crawled into my arms nuzzling against my breasts. "I'm okay," my voice shook. "How are you?"

"Tired. I so want to sleep. I was missing you."

Every time he said something like that my heart rejoiced and my eyes filled with tears.

My throat felt choked and I placed a trembling kiss on his lips. Then he was burrowing his nose back into my breasts and within minutes he was sleeping, my nipple still between his lips.

I smiled. My heart swelled with the love I felt for him. He was my baby. We both fell asleep. Maybe he had been quiet because of his work. It wasn't going to come between us. I gave a sigh of relief.

Days started rolling into weeks and I fell into a sort of a routine. In the afternoon I would talk to ma and then I'd start waiting for night to come for Rudra to return so we could sleep in each others arms.

It was almost a fortnight later that when I logged into my camera around late evening because I'd fallen asleep during the afternoon, that I heard Dr Sid in the nursery.

"Did you get my medicine Sid?" Ma asked Sid.

She extended her hand at once for the medicine. "You remembered?" She whispered elated.

"How could I forget my most favorite patient?" He chuckled lightly. "But before you can have it I'd like to examine you first."

Ma smiled shyly and Sid helped her gently to stand up from the chair she was feeding the baby in. On padded feet ma quietly placed sleeping Joel in the crib and then turned around to face Sid.

They hugged each other and Sid placed a tender kiss on her neck. My heart began to pound in my chest. I switched the screen off but could still hear them. Somehow I knew I shouldn't be witnessing this. Then I tried to think rationally, it was too early to draw hasty conclusions.

"Does it still hurt here?" He was asking. Maybe he was feeling her back like the last time.

Ma moaned. "Yes, it still does. I could hear her breathing."

"And here?"

She moaned again but replied in the negative. "You've got too many babies to feed Neela and you've been doing it alone for over three months. You should get help. I can arrange for someone to feed the babies. You need to rest..." They were both silent for a while. "I worry about you Neela..." His voice had a sexy charm to it that I could not categorize exactly. It was a mixture of sexual attraction and...love.

My heart began to pound. I knew Rudra was in love with ma, no matter how much he denied it because of me. But this new development would thoroughly devastate him. I knew how possessive he was of his women. The thought of me with another man drove him insane. I wondered what this would do to him.

"Here?" He asked after a while and I was snapped out. I still did not have the courage to actually watch them.

"Turn around," he asked huskily and I heard mother's saree rustle against him. In a few minutes he asked her again. "Does this help?"

"Yes,"she almost croaked.

They were absolutely quiet. I wondered what they were doing.

I waited for a while, then when I almost decided to turn the microphones off, I heard them again.

"Maybe you could massage my back Sid, before dinner?" She asked in a voice laced with... lust.

I did not hear a response only foot steps retreating from the room.

It was one thing to know that Sid had fallen for ma, but to know she was reciprocating, made me sick to my stomach.

I realized I found watching ma and Rudra have sex throughly gratifying but the thought of Sid with ma, that made me cringe.

I turned the microphone off and decided I was going to have a talk with ma the next day. Was Sid visiting the house everyday, how far had this relationship progressed. The thought made my head spin and I crawled into bed to rest for a little while before I ended up fainting.