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Click here"Fuck. Fuck." Joshua pants. "I love you. I want to do that more," he says as he separates from her and crawl into bed beside her.
Once they're laying down, she kisses him slowly. "So do I. I want to do that so many more times," she whispers. "We will be doing this for a long time."
***
The flight home was a little tense, but they were able to enjoy themselves and each other's company. They had plotted to have sex in the plane. Their plans were foiled when a family with several chatty and friendly young children were seated a few rows in front of them.
Standing at the baggage carousel, Alice remarks, "You know. Liz has that orientation thing that she needs to do with the incoming freshmen in a couple of weekends."
"Way ahead of you, Alice," Joshua retorts. "I already have something in the works for us to go do close enough to Gramps' farm." Alice eyes her son suspiciously. "Besides visiting your dad would be good cover for us sharing a room again."
Her face eases, and she breaks into a broad smile. "So, what have you planned out so far?"
- COMMENTS
rjb426874about 1 month agoPlease say that you are going to write a chapter 2 of this story.
What happened when they got home?
What happened to dear old dad?
Did he knock up mom?
PLEASE WRITE MORE OF THIS.
Please let me know if you are going to write more.
rjb49@bellsouth.net
shadracht4 months agoIt was decent, but some things felt off. It felt like they danced around being an actual couple, and then stepped back, and repeated. Josh woke up multiple times not remembering having sex the night before? And then no real resolution for their plans at the end.
.
What was there was nice, but it lacked elements to make it great. 4*
walkindatdog9 months agoThis story was a tender, loving one. Both of their thoughts on everything they were going through are clearly well-thought out -- we see and feel and hear them work through the machinations of their words and deeds. Very commendable. you obviously put a lot of care into the momentous steps they are taking together.
Technically, this story needs a LOT of work Practically every other sentence has a problem! You say you'll never get an editor cuz it's too intimate to give over to someone else to read? Well guess what? You gave it over to all of US to read, not bothering even to read it over yourself! If you had, you would have eliminated a LOT of the errors, not just syntax and spelling errors, either. The one that really had me scratching my head was why would a woman put rouge in her hair when it's supposed to be rubbed into her cheeks. Then i figured out you meant the 'rogue' hairs escaping her hairdo.Rouge, rogue...close, but wrong! Reading back over it, you might have run right by that, figuring you had it right, It wouldn't have been caught on spell-check, of course, hence the need for a second set of eyes. To say you'll never get an editor is the height of arrogance! What makes you so special that you're so willing to try your readers' patience? As i say, i loved the story you wove, but would have far preferred it if i wasn't having to parse every other sentence. So 4 stars, but 5 if you and your so far nonexistent editor had seen fit to CLEAN IT UP!!!
