All Comments on 'Runner Girl Ch. 03'

Wanting more. I like the sweeter side we are seeing of John.

I'm enjoying the way their relationship is forming! Can't wait for chapter 4.

There are some typos in this chapter. The mistakes are completely mine. My editor corrected them and I still missed them somehow. (Feeling awful) - Donna

....DB, don't sweat the trivial. Your writing talent attracts readers smart enough to figure out what you mean and are entertained by the depth of your story, that a few bloopers are of no significance to our enjoyment.

I love William's way of reading indirect evidence about John in this chapter! First, he's dead on in figuring out why Amy said those two words Tracy wrote down during the women's conversation about John. And then he assumes the worst when Amy says John sent her a photo! Both of those are hugely entertaining, but they're way more than that too. The fact that John is so predictable to William but also able to surprise him is just such a subtle means of implicit characterization.

Great instincts in this chapter ... from William, from John and Amy ... and from our esteemed author most of all!

After chapt 2 finger licking and devil may care attitude, I expected that to continue to keep her interested. Instead there are pictures of scenes one would send to a girl whos heart you are trying to win. After the set up, I wouldnt have expected this approach to work. But it does lead to her asking about more, so I will look forward to seeing how it plays out.

They suffer from rapid fluxes of positive and negative feelings. I really do not think that

he was trying to win her heart when he sent the picture. He was trying to be friendly and at the same time discover if she responded to the same elements of the picture that he did.

Instead of the woman who is used to being pursued, who has to fend off shallow men only seeking another notch on their trophy wall, we get to see it from the viewpoint of the too pretty man who is the target. He doesn't know how to be genuine, and believes because the woman isn't fawning all over him she must not like/want him.

Nicely done.