All Comments on 'Satisfied With Love Ch. 11'

You have a distinct tendency to overwrite so you repeat far too much in an attempt to be too faithful to reality but even though Brad's interlocutor may not have heard a story, the reader has, and by the third or fourth rehash is heartily sick of it. In this case the rehash of the engagement is unnecessary and tedious and can be severely paraphrased down from several paragraphs to two sentences.