Saving the Doctor - Epilogue

"Can I... ask you something else?" Matt said hesitantly. "It's really personal and you don't have to answer if you don't want to."

Jon shrugged, "Sure what is it?"

Matt took a breath, " Well the other part of what was making me nervous is that... like I've known you since residency, not like SUPER well, but I knew you were a good guy, smart, good looking, super nice, the girls would talk about you and all that. And, you two seemed pretty happy when I knew you before, and so... why did Elaina break up with you? Did she tell you?"

Jon hesitated.

Matt continued, "She'll never talk about it in detail, and I can't help worrying that if she would just up and leave a guy like YOU, and then like, here I am, not really any better. It freaks me out to think about it. So, did she tell you why?" Matt looked at him with genuine concern.

Jon stared silently and considered how he might even begin to describe any of the events and issues surrounding their breakup. He looked at Matt, obviously enamoured with her, seeing her in a completely different light, at the start of what might really be a happy marriage, and, surprisingly, he found that he didn't want to speak ill of her.

So, he simply took a breath, looked off into the night and said, "I cheated on her."

Matt sucked in a breath between his teeth. "DAMN, man," Matt said shaking his head. "That's gotta be the regret of your life. I would NOT have had you pegged for that."

Jon shrugged and sighed, "Before it all, I wouldn't have either," he said honestly. "Sometimes... weird crazy things happen though. In some ways it's complicated, in others.... not so much. Either way what's done is done at this point."

They stood in silence for a minute and Matt gave him a pondering look. "It kinda makes sense now though. Why she doesn't want to mention it. I'm shocked you two are on such good terms still."

"Me too honestly," Jon said. "Though it's not as good as it seems on the surface, if you hadn't already guessed. Our relationship was fucked though, even before it came out. It was a side effect, not the cause."

Matt nodded thoughtfully.

"We just weren't meant for each other. But you two... I think you are. As long as you don't fuck up like I did," Jon said, knowing he would never believe he and Carly were a fuck-up, but deciding it was simply the words Matt should hear.

Matt smiled and put his hand on his shoulder again, "Thanks man." he said. "And yeah, there's no way in hell I ever would....you learned your lesson at least though?"

Jon nodded thoughtfully, thinking of Carly. "Yeah... there's not too many things in this world that I'm sure of, but I'm absolutely sure at this point that I'll never want to do something like that again."

Matt gave him a fist bump and Jon turned at the sound of the door opening across the deck.

Jon watched Carly walk out into the moonlight and felt his heart swell. She complained so often now she felt like a frumpy overemotional beach-ball, but Jon looked at her and wondered how he could deserve someone with such a pure wholesome beauty, both inside and out. He found himself feeling the same impostor syndrome that Matt described, and he started to promise himself the same thing. He would do everything he could to earn her love so he could eventually feel like he deserved it...

Then he brought those thoughts to a screeching halt and thought better of it.

No. It wasn't like that. There was nothing to be earned or deserved like some sort of transaction. Yes, he would work to keep them happy, and be a good man for her, but there weren't any leagues or levels. No ladders of worth to climb. Nothing to prove. They were just two people that loved each other, as they were, and that was enough. It was all it needed to be. All it should be.

"What?" Carly said, noticing his transfixed eyes as she walked up to him.

Jon snapped out of his admiring stare and smiled, "You look amazing in the moonlight, that's all," he said, taking her hand and pecking her a delicate kiss, loving her appreciative smile.

"Well I better get back inside," Matt said. "It was great talking to you Jon, thanks again, have a great night you two,"

"You too Matt," Jon said, as he walked away.

*********

Carly let out a contented sigh as she leaned into Jon and they slowly drifted down away from the deck and along the path into the calm darkness of the orchards.

Her feet hurt and she felt like she would tip him over, but she hugged herself against his arm and shoulder and smiled as he supported her strongly. Really, despite the aches and heartburn, everything felt perfect. The shadows of the trees around them blocked out the light from the buildings and an amazing powdered sky of stars and a bright moon lit their way.

She felt a tear of happiness form and hugged him closer. He leaned in as well and ran his hand over her baby bump. She was self conscious of it, but he genuinely seemed to love it. She had watched him grow more and more excited and devoted the closer she got to her due date. It was a nice balance for her nervousness. Nervousness didn't mean she had second thoughts though. She had always had doubts and misgivings with Brent and Sean and other old boyfriends. She had never felt anything like this. This amazing comforting certainty. It didn't make any justifiable sense, but she didn't need it to. Things just somehow felt finally right.

Even the ridiculousness of being at this wedding had been weirdly reassuring. She had definitely had second thoughts about coming and was thisclose to flaking, but in the end she was glad they went through with it. Elaina seemed like she wasn't as insane as she had been before, or, if not, she was at least going to make it someone else's problem now. She clearly was still bitter towards Carly, and it was actually a bit satisfying seeing the cold politeness between her and Jon, but she admittedly didn't seem like a monster at this point.

As if to read her thoughts Jon spoke up.

"Thanks for being here with me. I hope it wasn't too awkward?" he asked.

She shrugged, "No problem. I knew it would be a bit awkward, but I'll always want to be there for you whenever you need me. If it helps everyone to move on, then it was worth it." Carly paused and smiled. "Plus you look cute as fuck in a suit and any excuse to get you into one is good."

He laughed with her and pulled her closer. "Well I don't care what you keep saying, you're the most beautiful woman here."

"Psshh, your love-goggles are fogging up," she said, but blushed and squeezed her fingers into his side.

"Let 'em. I don't care," he said with a chuckle.

There was a comfortable silence.

"Seriously though, I think I do feel a bit better coming here, it's seeming like we won't have to worry about her anymore, or am I wrong?" Carly asked. "I don't know what you guys talked about."

Jon's hesitation made her a bit nervous, but then he said, "Yeah... I don't think we'll need to worry about her threatening us or anything. But, if she's a changed woman, it's only slightly, and mostly on the surface. She's still under there. So don't go thinking we're gonna be friends or anything."

"Oh, God no," Carly agreed. Then sighed, thinking back to everything. "It just seems... wrong. That she gets to just... get away with it. I feel like she deserves SOMETHING. Some kind of consequence for what she did."

Jon nodded and rubbed her side, "I know. I've had the same feelings. But, it wouldn't be worth it. She's out of our life now and I don't want to mess with that. I'm happier than I've ever been. I think you're happy. I just want a simple life with you, and that's all. I wouldn't want to do anything that would jeopardize that."

Carly shoved him, "What do you mean you THINK I'm happy? Of COURSE I'm happy. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me." she squeezed him hard and felt her eyes welling up.

Jon kissed her hair as she leaned into him. "You are too," he whispered.

His words felt so good and Carly believed they were genuine, but she couldn't help herself from asking, "Am I?"

"Of course," Jon chuckled and gently squeezed her side again.

"I just... I don't know, you don't feel suddenly tied down?" she asked.

"No! I mean, do you?" he asked her.

"Well no. I just feel like... you got away from Elaina. Maybe your life could've suddenly been more exciting... more free?"

"Carly stop, please, I don't know how many times I can tell you, being with you is like a dream come true for me."

She squeezed him back affectionately but continued, "Well wasn't it a dream to..." she sighed. "K, I've never told you this, but before Beth gave me your phone she showed me some texts."

Jon stiffened up. Carly gulped and continued, "So... I saw all the stuff you had been talking to Vienna about."

Jon replied urgently, "Carly, I was only considering that because I thought you didn't want me, and were done with me. I'm sorry, I-"

"What? No Jon don't apologize," Carly couldn't help but laugh and nudge him.

"So, you read that I couldn't go through with it though, right?... because of you. It wasn't worth it if there was any chance of being with you," he explained, still sounding deeply apologetic.

"I know, Jon. I know, I saw it, and it meant so much..." Carly reassured him with a squeeze, and started to well up. "I love that you did, but... don't you ever wonder? Don't you ever feel, like, the slightest regret, that you're not off doing exciting and amazing things? Don't you still think about it?"

Jon was silent for a moment, "Don't you ever think about what you could be doing if I wasn't around? Other things you could be doing, other places you could go, other guys you could be with?"

"No!" she shoved him."

"Come on... even celebrities? You mentioned the other day that barista was really good looking..." Jon teased.

Carly pouted, "Fine, but not in like, a serious way."

"Well, this is the thing," Jon explained. "My point is, everyone has fantasies, and no one fantasizes about what they already have."

Carly snorted.

"And I think that's fine," Jon continued, "Because they're just fantasies and we know what they are. They're not reality."

Carly sighed, "Okay. But for you all that stuff was actually a possibility, you could have gone overseas, and done amazing work!"

"Well, it was a dream..." he said. "But I think it was better as a fantasy. To have actually gone through with it... All the unappealing details, and work, and pressures, and difficult parts, the dangers... it all would have hit me, and I don't think I wanted the dream of it enough to actually face the wake-up call of the reality that came with going through with it."

Carly nodded, then asked, "Do you mean the work, or being with Vienna?"

"Both, honestly." Jon said with a bitter laugh. "She's a beautiful woman and seemed amazing on the surface, but she's got her own set of issues, and in the end... she's wasn't worth it either."

Carly smiled, "K... I believe you Jon. And I'm not really jealous or anything, I just didn't know how you felt about it at this point."

"It's okay. It's good to talk about it," he reassured her.

"...Was I a fantasy?" she asked.

Jon thought for a second, "I thought so at one point, but I don't think it was like that."

Carly smirked, "I mean... I fantasized about you a LOT."

Jon chuckled, "Well... me too, but... I wasn't idolizing you from afar not really knowing who you were. We got pretty deep and dirty into each others' problems pretty quick, and I don't think I truly fell for you until after that. You were real from the start I think."

Carly squeezed him tightly and gave a tearful smile, "You were too." She sniffled and gave a relieved sigh. "I'm sorry Jon, I didn't want to start drama, I'm just... so fucking happy with you, I don't want anything to brew under the surface and be oblivious or ignore it."

Jon gave her a reassuring smile, "You're not Carly. There's definitely things in my life that I wonder about, and that I regret, but being with you is never going to be one of them, I promise you."

Carly looked up at him with a helpless adoration and gave him a wet smooch and and almost painfully tight squeeze.

"Me too," she said, and leaned her head back on his shoulder.

They both felt the baby kick and she heard him give a sniffling laugh, and pull his arm more strongly around her.

They walked on, in serene silence, with the crickets and frogs serenading them under the brilliant blanket of stars. Carly's feet were hurting more, but she still felt like she wanted to walk with him like this forever.

The path turned and they came upon a bench. Jon read Carly's mind again.

"Want to take a load off for a bit?" he asked.

"Yeah," she smiled, and they sat down and snuggled on the bench gazing up at the stars.

"If you imagine a lion statue over there, you could almost pretend we're back at our bench in the park," Carly said as she leaned her head on his shoulder again.

Jon chuckled, "I think this is a bit of a step up."

Carly pouted, "I love it there. It's my favourite place. Even if this is technically nicer."

"Even after what happened there?" Jon asked.

"Yeah, the good memories still far outweigh the bad," she said with a sentimental smile.

"Oh, I meant to mention it to you, they're actually gonna be taking that bench out of there," he said.

"What? No!"

"And replacing with a new one," Jon chuckled. "There was a guy with the city taking measurements the other day while I was waiting for you."

"Still! I like that bench!" Carly pouted.

"It's kinda old and cracked in a few places," Jon shrugged.

"I don't care. I'll be sad," she lamented.

Jon paused, "I mean, they're probably just going to scrap it, we could talk to someone and see if they'll sell it to us."

Carly gasped and smiled, "Totally! It'd be perfect next to the garden. Can we please?"

Jon chuckled, "It's your house."

Carly pinched him with a smile, "K we're doing it then." She thought for a moment. "On that note though, we really should talk more seriously about getting you on to the mortgage somehow."

Jon smirked, "You could just up my rent and keep it all for yourself."

"Naw, then you might move out, you're a pretty sweet roommate," Carly joked.

Jon laughed, "That's good to hear."

She looked up at him more seriously after a moment, "You would want to own it with me, right? Like it's just a joke when we say 'roommate' you're so much more th..." her voice caught in embarrassment.

Jon looked down at her and pecked her a kiss, "Of course Carly, I know. Yeah, I absolutely want to."

She smiled and bit her lip.

He continued, "It's just... I don't know how complicated that might be, like it'd be simpler if we were married," he said. His voice sounded casual but she felt him stiffen a bit, as if he had caught himself saying it.

Carly's heart started to pound. "Yeah, that's true..."

Jon gulped, "I mean, I guess we'll be technically common-law after a while here."

"Yeah. Yeah I guess," Carly agreed nervously. "But, yeah it would make a lot of things easier... Like with the baby, and registering and all that."

"Of course yeah," Jon said, moving his fingers along her hip. "That's... coming pretty soon though."

"I know..." Carly said, trying to control her breathing, and running her hand along his side as well.

"You wouldn't want to... do anything sudden and crazy like these two right?" Jon said, nodding back at the wedding venue.

Carly giggled anxiously, "I mean, they seem happy enough."

Jon laughed, "I guess. Let's maybe not use them as a relationship to model ours after though."

Carly snorted a laugh, "Yeah no. I mean I definitely wouldn't want a huge crazy party like this anyway."

"Yeah," Jon agreed, "But I'd still want something. Something small, but nice, with family and close friends. It would be something worth celebrating right?"

She grasped his hand over top of her hip and interlocked their fingers, and he did the same as their hands could barely stop moving over each other.

"Of course," she said. "It would be the happiest day of my life." She looked up at him, surprised that these words were spilling out of her, but they were all true.

He looked down at her and pecked an affectionate kiss and smiled, "Me too."

Their hands kept kneading into each other and their breaths were both heightened in nervousness. She stared into those amazing comforting eyes and started to feel an excitement like she'd never felt before.

"We could just elope," she found herself blurting out.

He looked away in thought and then back at her, "Yeah, just find a justice of the peace, before the baby comes. And then do the wedding ceremony with everyone else some other time."

She nodded back quickly in agreement, biting her lip, feeling like the cool night air was suddenly a hundred degrees.

He turned his body to face her, and she jumped in excitement at his hand on her leg, grasping his wrist and looking up at him, trying not to shake in anticipation.

"Carly... would you really want to?..." he said, looking at her in the same amazement she felt pulsing through herself.

She nodded in agreement again, feeling like her throat was too busy taking shaky breaths to speak. They stared into each other's eyes, their hands caressing and their breaths mingling in the small space between their faces, and Carly felt like she'd lost track of time. Finally Jon moved.

He slid off the bench, and down on one knee.

Carly gasped and put both her hands over her mouth, she finally let her body shake in excitement and tears of joy poured out suddenly from her eyes.

Jon reached up with open hands and shrugged, "I don't have a ring."

Carly let out a laugh and a sob of joy, and took his hands in hers, squeezing tightly. "I don't care," she reassured him.

He gave a smile of nervous embarrassment, but looked at her with tender loving eyes, and then asked her.

"Carly... will you marry me?"

She nodded and bounced up and down as tears flowed out of her, "Yes! Yes Jon, of course I will!"

She lunged forward and wrapped her arms around his neck as their mouths collided in a kiss of overwhelming passion. He fell backwards on to the grass but never hesitated in pulling her strongly into him and they laughed as he hit the ground. They kissed again and their bodies entangled on the lawn, getting wet with dew and covered in clippings and twigs but not caring in the slightest as they kissed, and caressed, and adored each other under the stars.

**********

1 Year Later,

Jon's heart skipped a beat as Carly came into view from under the small flowered archway. Their backyard was full of close friends and family, who all stood up as she walked slowly down the path between them on their lawn. Her father walked with her proudly, and her mother sat in the first row, bouncing Jon and Carly's 11 month old son on her knee. Rob strummed the guitar off to the side, while Jeff, and Jon's old friend Todd stood next to Jon in front of the row of trees at the back of the yard. Grace, and Carly's sister stood across from them in their bridesmaid's dresses. Jon stood tall in his tailored suit and tie, watched Carly walk gradually closer, and resisted pinching himself to reassure him that he wasn't dreaming.

Carly's soft cheeks puckered in a precious dimple that a falling tear flowed into. Her blue eyes, glistening with moisture, stared back at him under her thick waving locks of styled-up blonde hair. Her white dress only showed a bit of cleavage but clung to her thick, voluptuous figure beautifully. Jon still heard her complain every now and then about trying to lose her 'baby weight', but he wouldn't change a thing. Her tits were even bigger, her hips were rounder, and every time he sunk into her fertile motherly curves on their bed, any notion of stretch marks or sag was long forgotten.