All Comments on 'Scene in a Dance Club'

When you gonna realize no one is into your kinks here? One star.

I can't really comment on the story as a whole, I'm afraid I stopped reading after only around a quarter of the first page. It didn't bode well when the main character boasted about working in construction, I can assure you, after working in construction all my adult life, a job doesn't define you as a man, construction workers are no tougher than most other trades or professions. But then our hero uttered the words to his wife "if you lie, I'll hurt you."

She may be a cheat and a slut, but he just proved himself to be a bully and a coward. I may return to see if things improve but for now I don't need to read about arseholes like this.

Long winded and full of shit. Don't give up the day job.

Well that was atrocious. Please find another hobby.

Weird but well written.

5 stars

I used to like demander's stories but he's turned into an immoral ass. I will not read him again.

What a lot of utter nonsense! I'm usually a great fan of this author but this offering is a dud. I just about endured it to the end of page 1 then when I saw it was 5 pages long I raised the white flag unashamedly. 0 stars.

Great. Just read a Jerry Springer story of degenerates breeding. Way to lower the IQ. This was the beginning in Idiocracy.

As is the new norm these days…all of Demanders stories start at Level Disgusting and go further downhill from there..

Poor guy must hve been given the short end of the cuckstick by his wife!!

A suit suite. He'd be sorry -- tout suite. lol nice

Appreciate you trying out new things with your storytelling, buy this one doesn't work for me.

Another dud from demander. I thought I was reading Groundhog Day over and over and over for 5 long pages in the hopes that Jimbo would finally grow a set.

Let me get this straight... two husband's stop their wifes from cheating only to have them swap? WTF? One star.

The swap killed it for me and they might as well fuck the other guys. No man would be willing to swap especially with a bff.

Swingers and Swappers paradise. I think the men in this story married the wrong women.

Man that was a strange story.

I absolutely loved it what a fabulous story, so different from u normally write.

Thank you.

Now do the story about Sam please.

Scores 5/5 should be more

Just bad.

Ok attempt but the good start fell off the cliff.

Great story telling

What a cluster fuck.

I'm going to start by saying I severely dislike this sort of story - the husband accepting the cheating wife, the hot neighbor woman, the swapping - it all seems so outlandish. That out of the way, I can say that this was an amazingly well written story. I hung on every page. You make me wish that I enjoyed these types of stories to get an even greater appreciation for your writing. Well done.

5 stars. BUT--A VERY STRANGE STORY!!! I just felt like I knew where this story was going very early on in the reading. So, I Just went along for the ride and had a number of laughs along the way. This is FICTION! It's a figment of the authors' mind. A friend of mind had an expression that I think applies to this story. Nutsy cokoo!

Uniquely twisted

Great story.

I gave it a 4 out of respect for the author, but it felt more like a 3. There was so much switching I sometimes lost who was who.

Sam, ... really? Another story. That would have really twisted me up. All this swapping going on. I don't think I could ever do something like that. Just to old, I guess.

Kinda stupid. I cant get behind the kids reaction, dont they care about both of their parents at all? If my father would have swapped with the neighbor I would have been furious. Who doesnt want their father at home every day and not just for barbecues?

This is one mixed up mess. No stars

Interesting story with a different kind of ending. It would make a interesting movie.

Well…can’t say this author doesn’t have an imagination 😎. What a fantasy ride!

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Not sure any of these 4 sex crazed idiots has a clue about what a marriage is all about. But not only did they have kids when they started their wife sharing arrangement…by golly they decided to have MORE kids with each other’s spouse! Of course!

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The quick reaction would be to blame Nancy, who seems to have an uncontrollable urge for new cock that even marriage vows and a studly husband can’t suppress. But wait! It was the husband who got them all up into the suite and had everyone strip and choose partners 🥳.

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Just too stupid to really enjoy…..and the sex scenes weren’t even that good 😩

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2 **

I do not rate stoies about willing cucks, Swappers {aka-cucks) swappers(aka-idiot cucks) or rapists. Tthey are stupid on so many levels that I don't want to flounder in that pig-stye of shit. Oviuosly your story sucked a big hairy cum-spewing root. after the first page..

What a fucked up group of 4

Started with some promise but went into the shitter pretty darn quick. I have to commend myself for sticking through to the end of this story of moral degenerates making a mockery of the institution of marriage and monogamy with no consequences. 1 star for me, is there a way to go less?

0 star - sick sharing crap - the lame ass husbands should have separated from the loser skanky sluts, after catching them in the hotel. Yes, I also felt that you disparaged construction workers. There are a few million ex-military people out here that are professionally trained killers. They might be a better choice if your looking for a character who could be strong, but in total control of their emotions - because we are all trained to to do that - focus on the enemy until they are not a threat - by whatever means possible.

However, I did give you 1 star to fuck with your average score rating.

You can delete my comments, BUT you can't change the score rating.

A very well told story. Character development and description top of the mark story line left me cold. In such case I honestly don’t know how to vote

Shocking that nobody ever uttered the words “sexual harassment”.

The rest? It’s an old, and true story. During the 1970’s, two baseball players traded wives, kids, the works. Not a swap, a forever trade. Look it up, Mike Kekich and Fritz Peterson. Eventually one of the couples failed, but the other survived.

Well written. A little strange. Sharing rarely works out. But if you imagine it did, you did a good job with the premise. Burning every wife that comes close at the stake would probably mean a shortage of women. Apparently, I am the the guy that tempts them. I get hit on by wives. Girls came after me starting in middle school. Moms of girls I went out with in high school. Once coming back from a meet, the head cheerleader sat on my hand. I had put my hand on the bus seat, She sat, stayed, wiggled and got my hand wet. She was dating the quarterback. She was pretty clear about being willing to change boyfriends. I ran cross country. Getting all beat up playing linebacker wasn't for me, as much as I liked clobbering the other guy. He didn't find out for most of the year.

I think it is what Nancy says it is. Lust wins every so often. I think women are worse then men sometimes.

You BTB guys need to keep a close eye out because women are really good at prevaricating, evading and conspiring.

That was new. Thank you!

Nancy (and now Billy) have a problem, still. And I definitely want to hear about Sam. I've never met anyone like that.

Derp derp blbobkbkbkblblbkbl........

Pathetic

The real, substantive upside is you terminated all the usual LW clichés with extreme prejudice. It's a super imaginative, original story that's both well-written and flows along very well. 5/5!!!

I am not normally a fan of the clipped, Hemingway-esque style you employ, but you pulled it off. 5 stars.

Craptastic

Narrative flowed better than your last few outings but the story arc was too convoluted. I would have recommended go with a story of best friends swapping OR potential cheating wife/slut story, but not mixed. 3*

Gaymander strikes again with a totally dumb assed story that reeks so badly my wife asked if i shit myself when she just walked past, and I said no gaymander left another floater in LW and thats what you smell. She laughed and said the cum guzzler struck again, huh? I rolled my eyes and told her "Yup, he popped out a nasty growler, but that seems to be his forte' so I shouldnt be surprised'.

Started well but went down hill in the second half

Well assembled story that was easy to read but difficult for me to understand the lack of reasoning for the couples no matter how the paired together.

Eh, not worth the time wasted reading.

Screwed up piece of garbage don't bother reading it. It's a waste of time pure bullsh-t.

Just depressing

I am a follower of this author, but if this is what we can expect from him, then I won’t be for much longer. This one was ridiculous.

I don't ever censor the comments. Everybody gets their say. Mostly they're interesting, for various reasons. The comments on many of my stories are all over the place. Sometime not. But the ones I liked writing the most usually end up like this one. Lotta guys hate it. I'm often quite emotional when I read some of the other stories on this site. Normally true anger. Seems like others also have such reactions. D

All it needs is Nicholson and Garfunkel. I gave up less than halfway through. Hurray for immature writers.

I can always find respect for a story that is willing to piss off both sides of the betrayal vs sharing divide. Other than the sharing experiment, there wasn't much else to see here.

A good solution, and well written

Great story and excellent story telling...

5 🌟s

Fred

This was a lot like a fully fleshed-out porn script with drama and action between the porn scenes. It checked many mark for porn: straight, cuckold, swapping, group, & DP. The story lost verisimilitude with Jimbo’s and Billy’s first encounter with Mr. Beamon. He accepted his employee’s behaviors too casually without recognizing his company’s civil liability. But it’s a fantasy story, so reality doesn’t matter.

Good grief. Caught red handed cheating and then we swap. Just absurd. Nomremorse from the sluts at all. None. These people are robots or psychopaths. Lack of emotion is appalling.

Different, not in a good way.

A reasonable story for the LW section but it wasn't my cup of tea. Swapping was ridiculous - just four people who can't keep it in their pants. Untrustworthy people. Don't see how the kids put up with it. And it doesn't seem like Sam would have been a story for another time. Writing was okay with some glaring errors. Maybe a good editor to shorten it.

Interesting!

4

Please stop. I need to take a shower now to get this crap off of me.

Pretty well written, a bit OTT, but it is fiction. I have mixed feelings about the swap. It is 2 close couples, not 15-20 like some stories, so maybe I could see it happening in real life. The potential for disaster was strong, but it worked out for them. Gotta wonder about all the legal stuff with the kids and borrowed wives.

Sorry! This one is just stupid.

Very very fucked up, but compelling enough to read, I'll give you that. Kind of a mix between polyamory, open marriage, swapping, and cuckolding. I feel its unfair, but I see Nancy as mentally/sexually dysfunctional, Janet just impressionable, and the two cucks doing their best to cope. What's unavoidable is the message the story portrays: sex is physical, emotional, but only slightly intellectual. The brain is NOT the most important sex organ for the characters you created. Their sexual appetites and attitudes reflect the behavior of post pubescent teens who are all hormones and no brains. Just fuck, fuck, fuck; count up the orgasms to see who wins. Silly, and juvenile.

The other message in this story as that children are somewhat more than pets and less than significant people in these marriages. We are told more about the people they are fucking and beating than their children, which indicates an author who has no children, and probably had a very dysfunctional family. When you have children you cannot be a self centered arrogant sex driven person and still be a good parent. And you actually had Nancy's cuck Bragging about how wonderful of a mother, and wife, she is. There you are entering the Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde realm, which is preposterous, which is why it was written as science fiction. Or maybe this author subscribes to the Mr. Potato Head character morphing, where you unplug the loyal loving faithful wife parts, plug in the selfish guiltless wanton whore parts, and just switch them back in forth depending on where you are in the story: "Hey, its just fiction, I can make these characters do Anything I want. Who the fuck are you to claim what is and is not normal?" Of course you can, haven't you read Tolkien? At least he had the decency to place his fiction in a fictional universe. The characters in this story are from a different planet, so why not include that in the plot? Nancy was hit with Martian Slut Ray in the first page: "I just can't help myself." No brains needed to understand this story.

So thanks for the effort. Really shitty to use children, human beings, as fodder and justification for these parent's perverse life style. Like the kids are all going to grow up perfectly normal. More science fiction.

I'm pretty sure these people are where the term "Trailer Trash" comes from. What a fucked up group of people. And thank you for not censoring comments. At least you are man enough to stand with your stories whether everyone likes them or not.

swapping=willing cuckoldry=garbage=one star, always, no exceptions

Horrible, and you know it. Intentionally made to be as repulsive as possible. Your stories have changed, and not in a good way....

cucks get one star

Very, very, clever... for such a convoluted mess. Sheeesh. How're they gonna splain this to the grand kids who's an aunt/uncle , which one's a cousin. Thanksgiving and Christmas times have gotta be, fun, fun, fun. This can't be considered two families, it's a community. LP

I did not like this story,what did this swapping do his their kids mental state and moral compass.? Personally a unrealistic happening .so who in this life has so much sex into there late years. Who lets their wife’s fuck around . Who has babies when there present children leave the nest. A story from the twilight zone.

Started off with a reasonable plot but as soon as the "confrontation" began it went very quickly downhill towards the inevitable ticking off every cuckold/swapping route that culminated in complete garbage. Ticking every masturbation fantasy box and stringing them together does not make for a story worth reading.

Well hell, i liked it but highly unlikely!

One of the biggest pieces of shit I've ever read on this site. Next time I see your name criticizing another story in the comments section, I'm just going to refer you back to this rancid pile of dung.

Not my cup of tea but atleast all parties entered more or less willingly into that foursome relationship.

Much too long a story for what was "said". The 2 hubbies see their wives with other men, going to be spending a weekend with them, but the husbands just wind up fucking the other's wife & continue it on. Nancy then continues with other men & her husband never divorces her? Why do anything then to stop her?

Finally, each men impregnating the other's wives is making this poor story even worse. I skipped 1 1/2 pages to near the end because I couldn't continue reading. Just a long piece of shit for a story of 2 demented couples. 1 star. -- Bob

This writer used to be one of my fave writers.

Not anymore.

Just a pathetic piece of shit. All of the characters are despicable low class worthless immoral garbage. But certainly, they are good parents. the kids grew up in a loving household, the way all kids should be brought up, except they didn't actually know who were their real parents...confusing. The author is one dumb sicko! 1/5

few things to say confused defiantly most defiantly different but i enjoyed the fantasy great cant wait for the Sam's story

Wonderfull storey and a happy ending. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I liked it. It was a fun read. 5stars

This made little to no sense, felt like the polyamory was shoe horned in.

I guess overall, if nothing else it goes to show the mental gymnastics people will do to stay in a toxic relationship to remain comfortable and not experience change.

People who have no choice when other want to have sex with them. They can't decide no I won't because I committed and therefore need to be free to join sexual parts with anyone at all times.

It would seem that for some reason Jim didn't satisfy Nancy, while they were together Nancy would be compelled to have some "strange" now and then.

Yet once they swapped and Nancy was with Billy that urge seemed to stop, it would seem Billy was giving Nancy something Jim didn't or couldn't

Loved this the first time around. Like it just as well now.

This was a very interesting story. Your characters were well developed -- and not only the main four characters. The world revolves around Nancy. What she wants, she wants, and she may well have cheated numerous times before she got caught. However, how much responsibility does she have for her sexual activities? She may well have some sort of Obsessive/Compulsive disorder which would explain why things build up until she just can't stand it anymore. Then she acts on what may be part of a Serious and Persistent Mental Illness that she truly can't control. In any event, this story got me to think about the plot and the characters far more than any other story on this site. Well Done!

Great story even tho it didn't pass the Sunday-School teachers test.A lot of twists and turns and kinks. LP

It was a well written but longer than should've been story. I just can't get my head around the fact that, not once, Jimbo sees his wife behaving not like a wife & possibly intending to fuck another guy. A while back, she did do some heavy kissing & feeling with her boss. How Jimbo would accept afterward having sex with her, or being in a 4-some with Janet & Billy I can't comprehend. Then there's both women getting pregnant by the other's husband. No, the story went too far in "extremes".

-- Despite the good writing, the events of the story forces me to rate this 2 stars. If "tighter" with less thrown in sexual things, I could've rated this at least a 3. Bob

normally i enjoy this author, but this is not even close to his normal standard, 1 *.

Very good author, good writing, fucking bizarre as hell story. I'm leaving this one unscored.

This writer produces way too dispassionate idiotic male characters. Far too accepting in everything and totally dumb reactions. Sort of some weird wasteland of the mind. Exceptionally bad.

Pathetic crap

Thanks for your writing.

OMG a fantasy within a fantasy within a genre. I love this hot, bittersweet quad romance. Well-written, a bit dark but HEA.

id call it a pos but that would insult pos

I kind of liked it, but needed a score card to keep track of who was doing whom at that particular time. I'm not really big into swapping or their stories, but it worked for this one. Funny how Nancy seemed to stop looking for new dick once she was hooked up with Billy. I guess she just needed to be fucked multiple times a day, every day.

Well thought out plot. Well written. Carefully defined and clear characters. Worth a 5.

Personal note: not what I expected. Not my cup o tea.

From my perspective the only redeeming quality was the redemption of Nancy and that 5 kids still had families.

Different, but interesting.

Yep it all turned out well in the end

Was originally a 5 and still is.

Interesting story, like I said before Demander’s stories are like a box of chocolates. Thank you Demander.

Very, very good story, nicely done.