Scenes from a Marriage Pt. 19

2020-12-07

Author's note:

It's been several months since I've written about our journey. I stopped writing for two main reasons. First, life just got too busy for me to keep up with writing down our experiences. And second, my wife hadn't really been finding the time to read what I had written, which kind of took away a big piece of my motivation for writing it. But she just yesterday ordered me to start writing again, so here I am, picking up my keyboard again a few months later.

Before I stopped writing, I had already written up part 19 and the first half of part 20, so I've gone back and cleaned them up, and I'm posting them first. But since I wasn't keeping notes on our experiences during the time that I wasn't writing, there will be a gap in the story: part 21 will pick up several months after part 20 ends.

As I've said before, although my primary reason for writing is to obey my wife, I do also really enjoy hearing from others who get something positive out of reading these stories. If something I've written makes you think or feel something positive, I'd love to hear from you. I hope that reading about our experiences inspires some of you to explore your own kinks with someone special to you. I hope our story turns you on a bit. I'm even mischievous enough to hope that it makes some of you just a bit envious, but only in a titillating way. :) But whatever your reaction, please leave feedback and vote -- it really does mean a lot to me.

Of course, there are always those few readers that feel the need to leave feedback telling me how screwed up I am for letting my wife abuse me or some other such nonsense. To those of you that seem to feel the need to try to kink-shame us, please save yourselves the effort -- we wouldn't be sharing any of this if we were ashamed of it. If you think that our journey is about abuse or even just about kinky sex, then I'm afraid that you are completely missing the point. What our journey is really about is sharing experiences so intense that they bring us a stronger emotional connection, and it's brought my wife and I closer than ever before. So if the purpose of your comment is to tell us how wrong or messed up we are, I cordially invite you to keep your opinions to yourself. :) (Also, if this kind of story isn't doesn't appeal to you, why are you reading this category in the first place?)

Anyway, here's part 19, which picks up immediately after the end of part 18. These events happened this past summer, probably sometime around July.

Enjoy!

My wife had mentioned a couple of times that she wanted to watch the "50 Shades of Gray" movies. That Saturday night, after I put our son to bed, we watched the first one together. It seemed not very realistic from a D/s perspective, and we noticed a few things that didn't look quite right even from our limited experience with BDSM toys and techniques. But it was still a fun movie to watch together.

The next night, as we got ready to watch "50 Shades Darker", I mentioned to my wife that I was feeling a little needy. It had been about two weeks since our fantastic scene with the bondage board, and although we'd had some fun since then (a couple of teasing sessions, one of which resulted in a ruined orgasm for me, and one time she allowed me to pleasure her -- not that I'm keeping track, of course!), I was feeling the need for another long scene.

I still felt a little uncomfortable telling her that I was feeling needy, but I knew it was an important habit for us to get into. We had decided just a few days earlier to try having a nightly check-in about how needy I was feeling, with the explicit intent of just giving her information -- we were both going to try to look at it not as me telling her that I wanted a scene but rather as simply information that she should have in order to make an informed decision about when we would have a scene. She promised to try not to feel pressured by the information to have a scene if she wasn't in the mood, and I promised to try not to feel like she was just doing it to make me happy if I said something and then she decided that we would play that night.

On this particular evening, I didn't really expect that we would play anyway. First, my wife was still having her period, and I knew she generally didn't want to play until it was over. And second, once we were done watching the movie, it would be fairly late and we'd probably just want to go to sleep. But since we had decided that she should have the information on an ongoing basis, I was trying to make sure I got into the habit of telling her.

As we watched the movie, we snuggled together on the couch, me leaning against her. During one of the more steamy sex scenes, she reached down into my pants and underwear to tease me. She spent a few minutes caressing my cock through its cage and fondling my balls, occasionally lightly squeezing or stretching them. I moaned in appreciation and leaned my head back onto her shoulder, my attention torn between the erotic imagery on screen and the incredible sensations she was giving me.

When the movie was over, we went upstairs. I figured that we'd just be going to bed, but she surprised me. As soon as we got into our bedroom, she said one word to me: "Strip."

"Yes, Mistress," I said, pleasantly surprised and immediately complying. "Should I wear my collar?"

"Yes."

"Hmm, let's see," she said as I disrobed. "We'll need the crop."

"I'll get that out for you, Mistress." I finished stripping off my clothes and reached into the toy drawer for my collar and the crop. I put the crop down on the bed while I buckled the collar around my neck.

Meanwhile, Mistress had gone into the closet for her long-tail leather flogger and the new leather strap that we'd purchased to replace the one that had broken a few weeks previously. She put the two implements down on the bed next to the crop.

"Do we still have cuffs in the other room?" Mistress asked.

"Yes, Mistress, they're attached to the cross."

"Okay, pick up my toys and let's go."

"Oh, okay," I said, surprised that we were going to play in the other room. "If you're going to cuff me, then let me take off my day collar, so it doesn't get in the way of the cuffs."

My "day collar" is actually a black leather bracelet with the word "Hers" etched on the inside of it. It closes with a special clasp that requires an allen wrench to open. The only times I take it off are when I'm showering, when I'm giving our son a bath, or when we're playing in a way that involves cuffing me.

As I removed my day collar, Mistress decided to go use the bathroom, so I wound up waiting for her. As I looked at the crop, flogger, and strap sitting there on the bed, I began to feel a little anxious. This was going to be our first impact play scene since we'd had that intense talk about our previous scenes having been a bit too much for me, and I was still a little nervous about whether or not I could take enough pain to really give her pleasure.

I went into the bathroom to kneel down in front of her, just to try to get some closeness before we started. She leaned forward to lean her forehead against mine, and we looked into each other's eyes.

"How ya doing, Baby?" she asked me with a smile.

"I'm a little anxious, Mistress. This will be our first impact play since we talked, and I really hope we'll be able to find a way to do it that works for both of us."

"I know," she said, running her fingers through my hair. "Remember, we're working on this together."

"Yes, Mistress, I know."

When she was done, we went back into the bedroom. She went over to her nightstand where she'd left the key to my cage. I saw what she was doing and removed the hair band from around the top of the lock, which I normally wear to avoid the noise of the lock banging against the bars of the cage.

Mistress unlocked the lock, and I removed the cage and set it down on my nightstand. Mistress picked up her toys and motioned me to precede her into the hall. "Let's go."

"Yes, Mistress."

We walked down the hall to the guest room. I opened the door and turned on the light. I had recently replaced the normal light switch with a dimmer switch at Mistress's request, and the dimmer was set low, giving the room a slightly more intimate ambiance. Mistress walked in behind me and closed the door.

"I'm going to secure you with your back to the cross."

"Yes, Mistress," I said. I stepped up to put my back against the cross and raised my arms so that she could fasten them into the cuffs.

This was the first time we were going to use this new pair of cuffs we'd purchased specifically for use with the cross. Each cuff is a long leather band shaped like the number 6, where the wrist goes through the circular part, and an O-ring slides down to make the circle smaller so that the wrist can't slide out. The wearer can then grasp the band on top of the loop to bear the weight, so that the band around the wrist won't cut off their circulation. The top of the band has an attached clip, which I had secured to the ring on the cross.

Once Mistress had my wrist cuffs fastened, I spread my legs, expecting her to secure my ankles as well. But instead, she stepped close in front of me and looked me in the eyes.

"I'm not going to secure your legs. I might want you to have them in different positions tonight."

"Yes, Mistress."

"Do you trust me?" she asked softly.

I looked back into her eyes intently. "Yes, Mistress. I do."

"Good. Remember," she said, running her fingers through my hair, "we're doing this together. I'm going to start slow, and I will ask you how you're doing. Communicate with me, and we'll find what works for both of us. Okay?"

"Yes, Mistress."

She kissed me lovingly and then pulled back to look me in the eyes again. She reached down and took my balls in her hand, fondling then gently. I moaned in appreciation, staring back at her, allowing her to see my reactions plainly.

Then she began to squeeze my balls gently. My breathing increased a bit as she ramped up the pressure slowly with each squeeze. Every once in a while she happened to tighten her grip in a way that was more painful than I was expecting, making me jump and cry out softly. It was an incredibly erotic mix of pain and pleasure, and I could see a small smile grow on her face as she watched my reactions.

Next, she started pulling my balls downward, away from my body. I bent my knees just a bit and opened my thighs just a bit wider to give her better access. This also moved my pelvis a little closer to her hand, shortening the distance over which she was stretching my balls, but she quickly compensated for that on her next tug, pulling them the same distance that they had been before. Just as with the squeezing, she would occasionally wind up pulling them in a way that caused a little more pain than I was expecting, and I jumped and gasped at the sensation. Her smile grew even wider.

"I love seeing you like this," she said a bit huskily.

I smiled back at her. "And I love you seeing me like this, Mistress."

As she continued to push the boundaries of what my balls could take, she started teasing my cock with her other hand. At first, she just teased it with her fingertips, running them gently up and down, delighting in my shudder of arousal as she touched my frenulum. The mix of pleasure and pain was intense.

Then she wrapped her hand around it and started stroking it up and down slowly and firmly. At the same time, she continued squeezing and tugging on my balls. I alternated between moaning in arousal and wincing in pain, depending on which sensation was strongest at any given moment.

I had continued to stare into Mistress' eyes the whole time. I felt so connected with her. I knew she could read my every reaction from the expression on my face, and I loved seeing her small smile. It was a heady combination of arousal, satisfaction, cruelty, and love. I so craved giving her what she needed to wear that smile!

After a few stronger tugs on my balls, I grunted softly in pain. I could see her concern in her eyes.

"Is that too much for you?" she asked.

"No, Mistress." I replied.

"Where are you on our scale?" We had put just recently together a scale to try to better communicate where my pain level was during a scene.

I tried to figure out how to answer her, but my senses were being bombarded with both the pleasure of her hand on my cock and the pain she was imparting to my balls. I was having trouble gathering enough focus to form the words I needed.

"Talk to me," she ordered, gently but firmly. "If you don't tell me where you're at, I won't know."

"I know, Mistress, sorry!" I replied. "I'm trying to find the words, but I'm having trouble focusing."

She slowed her ministrations, giving me a chance to gather my thoughts. I still couldn't for the life of me remember which number on our scale I needed, so I fell back on words.

"It's good, Mistress. Really good. It's an incredible mix of pain and pleasure. Not too much pain -- it's that step on the scale where the pain is really adding something to the pleasure, you know?"

She smiled again. "Good, I'm glad."

She went back to stroking my cock and manipulating my balls for a while, enjoying the sight of my reactions as the pain and pleasure took turns capturing my attention.

After a while, she let go of my balls and picked up her crop. She smiled at me as she ran it softly over my chest, no doubt reveling in the slight apprehension she could see on my face.

She pulled back and struck the right side of my upper chest, just above my nipple. I instinctively sucked in a deeper breath, although it wasn't really that hard of a strike -- it was a purely psychological reaction. But she smiled at my reaction, and I smiled back at her.

She slowly moved the crop over to the left side of my chest, just hovering over the area for a moment, leaving me guessing as to when she would actually strike me. When she did, I again sucked in a breath, and we kept smiling at each other, both of us loving what she was doing to me.

She kept going in that vein, running the crop all over my body, randomly striking me when and where I least expected it. She struck my upper chest, my sides, and the outsides of my thighs.

I could feel the sting of her blows, especially on my thighs. She seemed to particularly relish my stronger reaction in that area, striking me there more often as a response. But I felt very connected with her, and she was doing a great job of keeping within my pain tolerance.

Just as the pain started to exceed what I was really comfortable with, she reached down with her other hand to grab hold of my cock. I moaned in pleasure as she started stroking it.

She continued striking me with the crop as she stroked my cock, making me dance on the razor's edge between pain and pleasure.

"Mmmm, I love seeing you like this."

I just smiled back, loving the way she was making me feel. Whenever she could see that one of the strikes hurt me a bit more, she'd give my cock a few firmer strikes to make up for it. My mind was being overloaded with just the right balance of pain and pleasure -- it was really incredible!

After a while of this treatment, she set down the crop and picked up her flogger. The pause in the pain and pleasure gave me a chance to come back to full awareness, and we smiled at each other, both of us enjoying our effect on the other.

"You still doing okay?"

"Yes, Mistress. I'm doing great."

"Good."

She started swinging the flogger around in a circular motion and moved it closer to my chest, striking me there a few times. It was not nearly hard enough to truly hurt, but I did enjoy the sensation -- the flogger is by far my favorite toy for impact play! We held each other's eyes as she struck me several more times on my chest.

Then she grinned at me wickedly and flogged my crotch! I jumped in surprise -- it wasn't terribly painful, but I wasn't expecting it at all! She laughed at my reaction, and after a moment, I laughed back. I loved how close I felt to her at that moment.

She gave me a few more quick strikes on my crotch, testing out what I could tolerate, and I actually found myself enjoying them. The blows weren't hard enough to hurt really badly, but they weren't just love taps either. But somehow I was enjoying it, probably due to both the physical and mental vulnerability that she was pulling out of me.

Unfortunately, at that point, I started to get light-headed.

"Mistress, I think I need a minute," I said, a little short of breath.

She immediately stopped. "Are you getting lightheaded?"

"Yeah, a little. I just need to catch my breath."

"Okay. Take as long as you need." She watched me for a moment. "Do you need me to get you down?"

"Not yet, Mistress. Just give me a chance to catch my breath."

But after a minute or two, I was still feeling a bit lightheaded and started to break out in a sweat.

"I don't like how you're looking. Let's get you down."

I was disappointed but knew not to argue. "Yes, Mistress."

She released me from the cuffs and helped me sit down on the futon for a minute. I had still hoped to be able to continue after I caught my breath, but after a moment, Mistress said, "I think we'll call it a night. It's already late, and we do need to get some sleep."

"Yes, Mistress." I was disappointed, but I understood. I was definitely going to have to work on keeping my breathing steady in the future, so that I didn't get light-headed again.

I loved the fact that we'd managed to have some impact play that we both seemed to really enjoy. That made me feel a lot better about the prospect of being able to please Mistress in the future.

After a moment or two, Mistress helped me up and we walked back to our room.

As we cleaned up, she noticed that there was a small bruise on the side of my cock. "Did you see this?" she said, sounding a bit concerned. "I must have caused you to burst a blood vessel when I struck you with the flogger."

I examined it. "It doesn't look too bad. And it doesn't actually hurt. I'm sure it will be fine." I looked at it some more and found myself feeling proud of having her mark on such an intimate area of my body. "Actually, I really like the fact that you've left a mark on me there."

She smiled at me. "Okay, time to put your cage back on."

"Yes, Mistress."

I put my cage back on and, as usual, presented it to Mistress to lock it, which she did. I also put my day collar back on and got into my pajamas. Then we got into bed, curled up in each other's arms, and fell asleep.

Monday morning, we were both pretty tired from staying up so late. My wife asked me to take the day off of work, so I did.

When our son woke up, we managed to mostly keep him busy playing with his toys for an hour or so while we stayed in bed snuggling. While he was occupied, Mistress reached under the covers and inside of my pants and boxers to tease me.

She caressed my cock through the bars of my cage, and I breathed deeply at the contact.

"Is there a problem?" she asked innocently.

"No, Mistress," I replied, arousal and amusement in my voice. "Why would there be a problem?"

She moved her hand down to my balls, pulling them down and away from my body. I winced at the sensation, letting her see the reaction in my eyes, but made no move to stop her, reveling in my submission to whatever she desired. I saw her watching my face intently with a small smile on her face.

I smiled at her. "You like watching my reactions, don't you?"

"Yeah," she said a bit huskily, still smiling at me. "There's something I love about knowing that I've caused you to react like that."

She closed her fist around the upper part of my sack, so that the balls were forced down below her hand. She reached down with her other hand to make sure she had captured both of them.