Sean and JJ

Sean rose from the sofa, his hands holding JJ's ass cheeks tightly. He circled the sofa, slipped out, and placed JJ on the humped back, chest down. The hump was tall. JJ's feet did not quite reach the floor, so he balanced on the top and his toes--which stretched him out and positioned him for Sean's re-entry. Thus, JJ was tensed and tight. Sean plunged, held JJ balanced on the sofa, and then allowed JJ to fall back into him, deepening the penetration. Sean's thick upper arms shot out and held JJ under his arms. In this position, Sean could bounce JJ to jack his cock. JJ was practically foaming with excitement. Then Sean dropped his chest to JJ's back and pulled himself deeper inside and nipped at the base of JJ's neck. Seans rugby-developed thighs began to lurch, the muscles in his ass clinching with each forward thrust. JJ exploded. He had been edged almost to oblivion, then taken to paradise. But Sean wasn't there yet. He pumped and pumped as his hands stroked JJ's ultra-sensitive post-orgasmic shaft. Then Sean too gave it up and filled JJ with his rich Irish cream. JJ was, by then, a ragdoll, although a rare bare one. Once again JJ had that "used up" feeling. Sean always took him there.

Sean bent and cradled him like a bride and walked him slowly to their bed, their eyes never straying. Sean placed him in the center carefully and climbed in behind, pulling JJ into a hard, deep spoon, one arm and one leg spreading possessively over JJ's warm body. This was the position that Sean knew JJ loved--protected, loved, and powned. He pulled up the duvet, and the two boys slept.

********

Kevin did call. They were definitely on for a quickie weekend in Dublin. So, the boys uber-ed out to the apartment to babysit. Kevin and Liz were going to have a grand dinner at the FitzGerald--and they had taken a suite for the night--their first real outing since Michael had been born. An elaborate Irish breakfast would be served to them in bed. Sean and JJ arrived at about five and were given all the instructions required for Michael's care: an early dinner (left by Liz), a nice warm bath, some cuddling time, then warm milk and bedtime around 8. Michael was a good sleeper--he was very active during the day and wore himself out. He rarely woke for a nighttime bottle and diaper change--but the excitement of having two "uncles" caring for him would probably make this one of those nights.

Michael was indeed a marvel, a miniature Kevin, with a full mop of curly red hair, rosy cheeks, a chubby arms and legs. (Kevin, however, was NOT chubby.) He had a perpetual smile and was very noisy, although no decipherable words could be interpreted from the stray sounds he made--except one, "more". He loved being bounced, swung, manhandled by the two guys and shouted "more" after each exercise.

Sean and JJ were enthralled. "I want one of these someday. Maybe more than one. I think I'd be a very good Da."

Michael was in bed by 8:30--only a little later than planned and asleep soon thereafter. The apartment was small, so there was no guest room. Liz had remade the master bed and invited her sitters to use it. The couch, although pull-out, wasn't very comfortable. Sean and JJ settled into the couch, each with a beer, and began to make-out. "I always wanted to do this when I was a baby-sitter, but I was always alone. Somehow this feels dangerous and illicit. Let's play. You're the sitter, JJ, and I'm your boyfriend. We never have time alone. So when you signed up for this gig, I agreed to stop by with food and beer. This is our first time alone--and without parents lurking upstairs. I'm going to see if you'll let me get to third base. If I'm lucky I might even hit a home run."

So Sean pulled JJ into his lap, kissed him passionately, and began to open the shirt buttons. Soon his hand was inside cupping the pecs and pinching the nipples. He pushed JJ back into a recline, bent over, and took the nipples into his mouth, tonguing them and then nipping them with teeth. JJ's arms went up around Sean's neck, pulling him into his chest and fisting Sean's now long curls. "Oh, babe, you've got me so hot."

Sean finished unbuttoning and pushed the shirt aside. Then he reached down and unbuttoned the fly. His hand was soon inside, fondling JJ's dick. "What do you have here, my dear? Is this a surprise?" JJ laughed and pushed his jeans down to his knees. Then he palmed Sean's rigid piece behind the denim.

"It looks like you have one too. But, yours is bigger. Do you think when I grow up, I'll have a bigger one too?"

"You can have this one whenever you want, babe." Both guys laughed heartily. It really wasn't that funny. And it obviously wasn't the first time that JJ had teased Sean about his size. Sean flipped JJ so that he was straddling Sean's thighs, positioning his bubbles for a massage. He began to work the muscles. "JJ, those squats are working. I can feel the muscles--and you now have dimples. I love dimples. They make good hand-holds. The dick is big enough for me. And these are just about the ripe size."

Sean spread, licked his fingers and began to work the pink rosebud. Slowly it opened and quivered. Then he was inside, working toward the pleasure point. JJ was squirming in pleasure. "I think that is technically third base. Are you up for a homer?"

"With you, I always hit homers." Sean pushed JJ off his lap and they walked to the bedroom. It turned into another night of terrific coupling. JJ was a perfect bottom. The night definitely called for missionary. So JJ pulled his legs up and rolled a bit, offering his butt to Sean. It was going to be a slow fuck. Sean prepared JJ with fingers and tongue. Then he lubed himself and leaned into JJ's thighs, positioning his bulb at the inviting entrance. Slowly he pushed in, stroked the love nut over and over again, and finally plunged and bottomed. JJ squeezed, then, using his anal muscles began the massage that would draw Sean's seed into his gut. Sean darkened, tensed and exploded. JJ followed instantly. "You just planted a little Sean in me. Now you've got to make an honest man out of me." Sean rolled off, pulled JJ into a spoon and then plugged with his semi-hard cock, trapping the cum inside his lover--at least for a little longer. If JJ wanted to be planted, Sean was ready to insure the seed took good root.

But the domesticity of the night triggered Sean's imagination. He began to think about the future, but soon was lulled to sleep by JJ's quieting presence in his arms.

Early the next morning, as Sean awakened, entangled in the arms and legs of his lover, both reeking of the previous night's activities, he stared up into the ceiling. He began to think. This is all a dream. We are not of the same class, not even of the same country. Remembering the summer, Sean realized that JJ, although at that time an innocent son of a wealthy family, was still his patron. Now, he lived in Sean's apartment--and dined on the BC food (however horrible it was at times) as the guest of a wealthy resident. JJ was very much his host, and he was just a toy. Sean's careful nurturing of JJ was bearing fruit: JJ was growing in confidence and glowing in the physical enhancement of his body thanks to the gym time. Soon JJ would realize he could do much better and Sean would be left to fend for himself. Sean began to wonder. What kind of therapist am I? I fall for my patient, and then I use him for my own pleasure. And begin to fear that my success with him professionally will result in my losing him to another.

Sean had turned JJ into his sub. He had taken advantage of JJ's unfortunate family situation, his hunger for affection. Or was it really compassion-turned-to-affection? Would JJ tire of this? He had money, and much more experience. He soon realized that whatever he might offer to JJ, there were others who were bigger, more talented, and wealthier. Sean devolved into a funk. Thinking about the future often did that to him, even though his own experience (after the childhood illness) had been joyful and loving. Why was he always so insecure? And when would JJ realize his confident demeanor was just a cover? His wit and sarcasm were costumes. These feelings, which struck him from time to time, would pass. He only needed to get busy. He decided to put all of his frustrations into his course work--and the role in the Shaw play.

He reached over to take JJ into his arms again--to reassure himself that JJ was his.

However, his thoughts were interrupted by a call from Michael, "More!!" This was his all purpose word for everything. It was time to return to domestic responsibilities. Sean put aside his gloomy thoughts and rose to care for Michael. JJ watched him leave the bed, got up himself, and stripped the bed. Then joined him in the kitchen. Time with Michael was precious. He wanted to make the most of it.

Later in the morning, Liz and Kevin returned and all four (plus Michael) went to the neighborhood café for lunch.

As lunch ended, JJ hugged Michael and added, "We'd be pleased to help with this little guy anytime. Just call."

They returned to the BC dorm and their apartment. Routines were soon re-established. As Christmas break neared, course work took up much of their time. It was hard to believe that their time together in Dublin was near the half-way point. No discussion of plans for the Christmas break had been made, but JJ did have an invitation from Fiona to join the O'Connors if he wasn't flying home to Boston.

JJ noticed the change in his apartment mate, but decided, at least for the time to ignore it. He knew Sean was a pretty complex guy--it was one of the things that attracted him to Sean. Sean was being really introspective--and at least some of his old humor was now restrained. JJ was enjoying the regular sex; in fact, most of the time he was in pre or quasi-orgasmic pleasure just being in the same room at Sean. He loved that, at least usually, Sean topped and brought him to increasingly harder orgasms. And he grew to love the intensity of study at Trinity. What more could either of them want?

What was going on with Sean? As things deteriorated (not the sex, as Sean regularly continued to use JJ and bring him to mind-blowing orgasms), their personal interactions became colder. JJ reluctantly decided it was time to talk. He was so happy with Sean. He didn't want to lose him. And he couldn't understand why Sean might be slipping away.

One night, just before dinner--when the guys had already decided that a mediocre dinner in the refectory was preferable to off-campus pizza, or perhaps Indian take-out--JJ initiated the discussion.

"Okay, Sean. What's wrong? I know there's something going on. Something's eating you. We are now family. I want to hear what you are thinking."

"Nothing's wrong. How could anything be wrong? We have a perfect apartment. Our courses are going well. And I love your ass."

"So why are we drifting?"

"This is not serious JJ, Don't worry. Let me start from the beginning. I think I owe you that. Back at the Lodge, you were a guest, no, a wealthy guest. I knew my job: serve tables in the dining room. I didn't know until I got there that part of the job meant being available to hotel guests afterwards. I am sure that you know that Peter fucked me--more than once, and pretty rough. He wasn't the only one. I was basically a young Irish stud-whore. You were the exception. I enjoyed my time with you--but you were paying--even when I asked you not to. I was a rent-boy. I tried to forget about that, but then you paid for everything in Boston--and I know that everything here in Dublin is on your tab."

"As time went on, I began to rationalize. I wasn't only taking from you. I was your therapist. I was bringing you back to life. I noticed you opening like an exotic flower."

"I'm a man, JJ. My job is to provide. I can't be beholden to anyone--even someone as beautiful and generous as you. I can fuck you--until you scream for release. That's a macho thing. And you obviously know that I like being in control. I can be in bed with you. Then, I'm definitely the man. But, outside of bed, it's all yours. I'm falling in love. No paid trick can afford to fall in love with a john. And no therapist is permitted to have a physical relationship with his patient. This is not a fairy tale where the wealthy handsome prince carries off his love. We've got this all wrong. I'm feeling kept. I'm feeling insecure. And on other days, I'm feeling like I'm betraying the trust you have placed in me."

"Somehow, I think I'm reliving Ms. Saigon--but fortunately, I don't have a child to care for. You are the big rich American--and in a few months you are going home, not forced by war, but by wealth. You are going back to Boston society. I would be just another poor immigrant there. I've got a chance here. Look at my brothers. I can be like them. There are great jobs and good money--and I can be me.

"Now get ready for this. In the last few weeks, I've been thinking that I'm going to change my major. I think I want to be a psychiatrist. I think I'd be a good one--at least if I can keep my hands from my patients and my dick out of their asses. You need to release me, JJ. I can't be tied to you forever--whatever I might feel and however much money you might have."

"This is perhaps the hardest speech of my life. When it was just physical--and when I was earning my keep by fucking you every way possible--I was able to put these thoughts aside. Then when I realized how dependent you were becoming on me as you matured from the difficulties of your childhood, I began to feel guilt. This was just a temporary, enjoyable chapter in my life. But, then we spent that night caring for Michael--and I realized that you were thinking family and children. I also realized that you were beginning to plan the us. You have exchanged your need for family love to an attachment to a guy who gives you pleasure. When I even begin to think about a long term future, I can't help but become depressed."

"I'm speechless." JJ went silent and then he climbed into Sean's lap. (He wasn't really speechless. It was just an expression to buy time.) "I was so inexperienced at receiving and giving affection until we met. I guess I've misinterpreted what we have and what we've become to each other. I'm sorry I hurt you, Sean. I guess I'm too weak a character to be a real partner to a big, confident Irish hunk. All I can say is that I do love you. I love you as I've never loved anyone in my life. I feel protected in your arms. I feel loved when you are inside me. I want us to be together. I don't want this to end. I've totally forgotten my horrible family." Sean tightened around JJ and JJ looked up and kissed Sean with all the passion he could manage. "Let me think for a few days. Then we can talk again."

"Is it too much to ask you to be inside me tonight?"

"If that's what you want. It's what you're paying for."

"My God, Sean. It isn't about money. I have never felt that I was buying you. I have a little more than you do--and my family has given me some material advantages. Yours on the other hand has made you into a loving, beautiful man. Do you want me to give it all away? If that is what I need to do to keep you, I'd do it in a second. Stop pricing everything. Only whores do that."

"And as to the therapy, yes, I do know you are good for me. You've brought me to a new place in my life. I couldn't be with anyone else. If you want to be a psychiatrist, I can live with that. In fact, I'll help you to get there. But, as of this minute, I'm not your patron--or your patient."

"Let's take this slow. I'm not trying to blow us up. But, I'm trying to understand you. I know you don't consciously think of me as your whore--or you as my patient. But, that may be the reality. And if that is so, our relationship is really screwed up--the doctor is being paid to screw the patient to rescue him from feelings that he's not loved. Can you imagine anything worse?"

"Are you kidding me? Do you have any idea how many times you have taken my ass in the last three months? I don't believe that it was all paid sex or therapy. You are very definitely a man, a hunky man, with a giant talented cock. I've seen the parasites of the world. Peter was one. I know how parasites work. And I've seen the boy-toys that Mother has in her bed all the time. I know how they think. I just don't believe it. Sean, you are not my whore, not my toy, not my doctor. You are my love."

"Grow up, Sean. We have different economic situations. So what? Let's get real. I want you in my life--and in my ass--every day if possible. Don't let your feelings of being kept come into the picture. Nor these phony feelings of guilt about pseudo-therapy. Surely, you realize that we are much more than that. Why don't you hold off on the feelings of guilt until after you have your degree? I'm happy to talk more about this, but I won't hear you talking about being kept. Or guilty. Period. Full stop."

JJ had rarely been so forceful--or so explicit. Sean had to accept that their relationship was real. The thick cock in his denims was testament to that. JJ was so beautiful. And not only his ass--although that would earn trophies. He was beautiful inside--his abuse had helped to mold him into a caring man.

"I'm through with this--for now. Let's take our 'argument' to the bedroom. I'm going to plow your ass--like the good rent-boi you've paid for."

"You can plow, boi. I'd love it. But, I'm not going to be ass-fucked by a rent-boi--or a therapist. I want a lover. And, I think the time has come for me to expect that. Are you with me, Sean? If you take me now, it's because we are lovers. Nothing else will do."

Sean thought for a few seconds, smiled, and said, "I'm ready to prove to you that we are lovers. Even if you are a descendant of Boston Irish-ass-fuckers." The old sarcastic Sean was coming back.

"No you don't, guy. It's my ass that is being fucked--and I think you are going to be doing the fucking. Deal?"

"Deal. How could it be otherwise, I'm in love with the cute little butt. And, I think I'm in love with you. We'll make this work."

Sean carried JJ to their bed. Sean carefully undressed JJ and placed him lovingly in the center of the king. Then, as Sean stood and stripped, JJ raised his legs in a wide V, gripped behind his knees and rolled back. Sean was hypnotized by the prize that was being offered to him. He knelt and his tongue reached out to taste the familiar musk of his boy. The tongue curled and invaded. JJ gasped. He was half-way to the moon already. Lubed fingers were replaced by Sean's enormous pole. Slowly he rocked, driving into JJ's tight sheathe with each stroke. He was patient, using hands to tease JJ's sensitive nips. When he saw the precum dripping onto JJ's abs and felt the anal massage, he knew JJ was near. He leaned in, pulled JJ's legs around his waist and reached down to take JJ's lips. JJ squeezed and pulled Sean ever deeper. And then the passion tipped. JJ reached up and drew Sean's mouth to his. As he did so, they both simultaneously erupted. Sean reached around and brought JJ up to his chest and they embraced and kissed. By the end, JJ was in tears. "That was absolutely the best I've ever experienced. How could you ever think of doing anything else?"

Later JJ told Sean that he was going to accept Fiona's invitation--they would be together for Christmas. There was no one and nothing in Boston for him. He was cutting himself off. Then, he added, almost as an afterthought, "I've applied to transfer to Trinity. I'm pretty sure I can finish my degree here next year. I'm not sure yet whether it will be a degree from Trinity or BC, but I really don't care. I've decided to do grad work in history-- here. The history profs are by far the best I've ever studied with. I like the passion they bring to the subject. I presume that Trinity has a Psych Department. We can be together."