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All Comments on 'Sex and Videogames Lvl. 01 Ch. 05'

by MyWritingSystem

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AnonymousAnonymous6 months ago

Thank you for this story :D it was a pleasure to read

DragosLoveDragosLove5 months ago

I was glad to get a break from the main character shouting "Fuck!" repeatedly in this chapter. I'd encourage you to outline the story structure a bit more and see if you can avoid the info dumps. A common trap in this genre is focusing too much on the minutia of the details about stats and junk so it gets in the way of the plot instead of supporting it. The bonus missions are excellent as a way of driving this forward as is experimenting with new abilities, but you might want to think about whether or not information you are presenting is relevant to your plotline.

I look forward to future chapters.

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userMyWritingSystem@MyWritingSystem
6 Stories
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One day I woke up and saw a bright white screen before me stating: I have unlocked an ability called Writing System. Of course, at first, I was shocked and scared by it but then I realised what it was, it was My-Writing-System suddenly my life had turned into a game and I ha...