Shot of Whiskey

I looked at him, how was he so fucking smart? I kissed him and let him drive us all into our third orgasm of the night. When it was over, Ryan and I shared a shot each, Robert kissed my lips and then took a shot of Coke.

The following morning Robert came to wake me up. He was freshly showered. He stripped naked to settle in as my little spoon on my tiny twin bed. He wrapped himself in my arms and backed what I can only surmise was a pre-lubed hole directly onto my cock which had no trouble entering and quicky spraying his warm meaty sleeve.

That night, the second day, the four of us were back together. Sam was eager to fuck a new hole and Robert agreed to try and take him. It was amazing to watch how enraptured he was when his sphincter was being stretched to the limit. I myself was horrified to think that my ass was opening up that wide every time Sam fucked me, but it did feel so good!

"So what were you doing for sex all these months," I asked Robert, after we had all enjoyed at least two thorough nuts that night. "I mean there is no privacy on this base. You think you can beat one off in the showers and suddenly some asshole flings open your curtain because you are using too much hot water."

This was a true Ryan story, told verbatim, and we all laughed. "Nothing, I just had a lot of wet dreams. I got used to waking up early to shower and I wash my sheets twice a week."

"Really," Ryan seemed in disbelief, "you weren't beating off anywhere?"

Robert shook his head and shrugged.

"So how did Ryan find out you liked men?" I asked. "I don't think that's in the unit bio pages."

"He's a pervert," Robert replied. "He was showering with the curtain open, fishing for eyeballs. I guess he caught mine."

"Fishing for eyeballs?" I cried, laughing at the term. "Why were you doing that, Ryan?"

He smiled and looked into my eyes, "For you, Nick. I felt bad Sam and I couldn't give you everything you were giving us, I mean we were trying our best, the kissing is fun and Sam really eats ass like it was snatch, but I know how awesome it is to get blown and well, I wanted to find a blower for you. So, I went fishing and caught me a fucking champion trout!"

As he spoke, he slapped Robert's ass as if he had been his prized creation.

I looked into Ryan's eyes again. My own filled with tears. "Don't do that Nick," he said to me. "I feel good when I am with you. I want you to feel just as good, no need for you to feel deprived or less loved."

I pulled him close and hugged him as tight as I could. A few tears fell on his back, I imagine he felt them. Sam tussled his hair and Robert was kissing my back, probably thanking Ryan for the hook he threw out into the universe.

I wiped my face and smiled again. "So, was Robert the only fish you caught?"

He laughed, "Shit no! I am a fucking ass magnet, apparently. I had seven guys come up to me later and hint that they wanted to fuck. If you ever get tired of us or we ship home, I got names, cock sizes and favorite drinks."

I laughed. "I guess that is all eHarmony ever needed to ask."

Over the weeks a pattern emerged where we spent the evenings together. Sex, when it happened was wilder and wilder, culminating the night before my scheduled trip home for a couple of weeks of leave, in a DP where I took turns with Sam and Ryan inside of Robert. I had purchased lube at the Embassy PX for that night -- amazingly they had lube at the Embassy PX.

Robert was laying on top of me, facing me so we could kiss and I could hear his groaning while he rode my cock. Ryan entered next. Robert looked so beautiful, his eyes rolling to the back of his head, a guttural grunt pouring out of him as he lost the ability to speak, the heat he was giving both Ryan and I, it was searing, like he was branding our cocks with his ass walls hotter than rolling lava. Sam nearly broke all of us when he replaced Ryan. I thought my dick was being crushed by one of those machines that chews up cars. It was so much pressure, Robert's hole felt tiny. Meanwhile, Ryan, as always, was cheering us on. Giving us small kisses, caressing Robert's back.

"I don't understand how your ass is not ripped in half right now, you want me to take a picture? It is so fucking huge! You could have a baby right now out of that hole! FUCK!"

I laughed, which did not help Robert, as the vibrations from my chest caused minor contractions to his pelvic floor and his anal sphincters. "No, no, no. No laughing until I can relax," he pleaded.

I caressed him and kissed him but after just a couple of minutes, I called it. I did not want to have to go to the infirmary and explain this injury. Robert was relieved, we were all writing checks his ass could not cash and we returned to a normal spit roasting of my beloved Robert. I never called him my boyfriend, Ryan was the only one that had done that, but I loved him in a different way than I loved Sam and Ryan, that was clear to all four of us. Outside my room we barely spoke, inside my room we were passionately in love and we hoped for a future long after this war was over.

We had spent every morning after we met, together. Rain, shine, snow or sleet, he found his way to my bed and we curled into one another. We talked of home, of loved ones and those whom we can no longer love as we once did, we talked about dreams and a life after Afghanistan. The day I left for home Robert crawled into my bed as he always did. This time he was facing me, our legs tangled together. He was two months from returning home, the entire unit would be returning home, in fact. Their deployment was just one year. Just...as if one year were easy doing what they were doing. He caressed my face and pushed my hair out of my eyes. He kissed me tenderly and said almost nothing. I can't wait to see you in three weeks. Me too. Please be safe. You too, please come back to me. I have to go, unit meeting. I love you. I love you too. We kissed, we merged, we replayed the intensity and the bond of our first kiss, as we did every morning when it was just the two of us. He smiled and winked at me and disappeared behind the small partition that shielded my door.

I got the call one week into my rest and recuperation trip. Ryan called my cell phone directly. No one else knew that I would need the call, there was no reason for them to know we had been what we had been inside my room. It was our own small world. It had been a IED, a roadside bomb. He was not in an MRAP, he had been manning the M60 on the turret of a HUMVEE. The vehicle had flipped violently. Two men were killed instantly. Two were injured and were recovering in Ramstein, one without a leg, the other might be ok, the brain scans and cognitive tests were still being worked through. I did not cry when I heard the news, I didn't even cry when I told my ex-wife who had become a dear friend over the years. She asked me if I was sad and I nodded my head, I felt the grief but I could not weep, not then.

I landed back at the same hopeless landing strip, eight months after I had first arrived. Sam was there with Lieutenant Dorado to welcome me back. He drove the car silently. Lieutenant Dorado spoke of PRT business and I listened, reacted, everything was still and everything was normal. I entered my room with Private Redding and Colonel Samuel Erikson helping me carry my bags. As the door closed behind Lieutenant Dorado, I sat on my bed and ran my hand over the space Robert had last occupied. His warmth was gone, his smell was gone, he was gone. I looked at my friends and they surrounded me immediately. They held me when I broke.

Death is horrific, death for a cause that you no longer believe in is particularly cruel, and death in absentia, told in some story that you did not witness, a body that you could not touch and bury, it is especially merciless. And so I wept. I wept for the nearly 200 mornings we spent together, the nearly 200 nights we laughed and kissed and made love and enjoyed the company of our friends, I wept for the 400 times we told each other we loved one another, I wept for the countless times we thought we had a future, I wept for the 10,000 times I looked in his eyes and felt loved, for the 10,000 more where my love poured out to him. I wept for the 400 times I touched his warm skin, for the 200 times he let me cradle his body and for the 200 times he wrapped himself inside my embrace. I wept for the 20,000 mornings we would not be together, for the 20,000 nights we would not hold hands while we drifted to sleep, for the wedding we would not have, for the children we would not raise, for the pets we would not adopt, for the Thanksgivings and Christmases we would not celebrate together. I wept for the presents we would not wrap. I wept. I mourned.

I had built a life with him and all we needed was time to deliver all that joy and happiness to the world, to each other. We just needed time. Time to show him how happy I could make him, time to be made happy by him. Everything was ready. Everything was aligned, in place, ready for just one tiny push forward. The seed was in the ground and needed a whisper of water to spring roots, leaves, stems and in no time at all, boundless bushels of the world's sweetest fruit. All the love, all the hope, all the promise, it was ready. I wept for all that we had and all that we experienced, but I hurt and mourned and was ripped to shreds from the inside out as I tried to mourn a future that was no more, that could not be.

There is no sadness I have known greater than the loss of promise, the loss of hope. So, I wept.

Ryan held me for hours, caressing my hair and whispering that he loved me, and I know he did. I know he does. Sam did the same, gently rubbing my back and bringing me water, bringing me tissues, bringing me whiskey. The night dragged on and I was inconsolable. Sam left and came back with six of Robert's best friends. The guys he was loyal to, they guys loyal to him, the ones that knew about us. They all stripped out of their shirts and their pants, they pulled me to the floor and took my clothes off as well. And through the night, someone was always holding me tight, their skin against mine, their warmth a gift and a comfort to me as I shook from the tears that seemed impossible to arrest or slow. They took turns attending to me, tenderly caressing my hair as Robert had, gently rubbing my chest, sometimes kissing my head. They held me while it all poured out of me, they stayed until sometime early in the morning when, completely exhausted and drained of my will to fight whatever it was that had taken him from me, I found I was done crying.

I had no words, but none were needed. They hugged me, squeezed my arms, some kissed my face. It was what we did now, make each other well enough to return home, that was the only mission left that was also worth doing.

Shot of Whiskey Ch 4: Getting Home

In the following days, after my return, after I had experienced the brunt of my grief over Robert, Sam and Ryan and I were determined to both survive their last six weeks in country but also to honor Robert's joy by experiencing more of our own. They had already had two weeks to mourn together with the unit and were lighter than I was, less burdened by the weight of recent loss. This helped me a lot and I asked Ryan at one point if any of the fish he had caught when he first introduced me to Robert were still around.

"Shit, Nick," Ryan asked, "You want more guys to fuck you? Sam and I are not enough? Have you seen his dick."

I laughed. "I've seen both your dicks; I love them a lot. I am just bummed you won't be my fuck buddies here or stateside, but no, I don't want another cock in our study group, I am just wondering what happens when you leave, I still have more than a year here."

"Why can't we fuck stateside?" Ryan asked.

"Yeah, I would sink my giggle stick into you anytime, Nick," Sam said, groping his package and shoving it in my general direction.

"Seriously?" I asked. "I thought this was like a prison thing, you break free and you forget about all the shit you did to survive, all the cock you took in the showers for protection."

"You still don't think we like you, do you Nick?" Ryan asked.

"Of course, I do, I know you care for me, I just did not even fathom or imagine the possibility that you would want to keep sharing your fat, delicious, juicy cocks with me once you had unfettered access to pussy," I replied.

Ryan smiled and slid close to me, "Why would I want pussy if I have unfettered access to your ass, Nick? Do you think that first day I flashed my cock at you I did it because I was desperate?"

"You did say AHIAH," I reminded him.

"Oh, don't be so sensitive, Nick," he said, leaning into my ear to whisper as his lips grazed my lobes. "That's just the starting line. Price of admission is a hole, absolutely true and I don't discriminate. But your hole is not just any hole, you have the fucking Powerball of holes. I love to hit your fucking walls and feel you gripping my cock with your fucking sphincter, chewing on my dick like you wanted to suck it up to your throat. Fucking cunt, you cock crazy whore, don't you ever dare deny me access to my favorite of all pussies."

I turned to look at him, "For real?"

"Let me show you," he said as he flipped me over, pulled my pants down and shoved inside of me all in less than one minute.

"You don't talk like that, Ryan," I said, though I was incredibly turned on. "You're the nice one."

"You promise me drilling rights to this here well and I will be nice again, tell me that my fucking Nick days are over, you will see another side to Ryan Redding," his voice was deeper, determined. He was believable as a possessive top and I was happy to have him back inside me after a month without.

"I missed that oval shaped cock of yours, Ryan. Nothing hits my honey box better than that fucking cock of yours! Please fuck my hole, Ryan! I promise you can have it any time you want it for the rest of our lives." I assured him, and I meant every word.

Sam stepped forward, naked and stroking a nearly hard 9 inches. "I'm hurt too, Nick, that you would think we would spend all this time with you just for an army fuck and a little whiskey. It's not even good whiskey!"

I knew he was lying for effect, but I deeply appreciated the sentiment. He sat in front of me and pointed his cock at my mouth, I leaned in and started deep throating his massive tool with zero trouble as I had become quite accustomed to his gorgeous monster. "See how nicely my dick fits inside your nooks, Nick? Explain to me why I would want to give that up. Yeah, strange friendships form in war zones, but many of them last. Don't think of us as lesser friends than Robert. You were prepared to be with him for the rest of your life, well, be prepared to keep us too. Maybe not married, that's gay, but fucking, and fishing and drinking real whiskey, shit yeah!"

I smiled and downed his cock, sticking my tongue out as far as I could to lather up his balls. I knew what he liked, and my tongue out always inspired a massive face fuck, today was no exception. It felt incredible, like a brief return to a more innocent time, to have both men driving their cocks angrily into both ends. I felt raggedy, loose, used, and I wanted nothing else in that moment. The feeling of Ryan's massive cock bulge punching my prostate and the way he gripped my hips and yanked me back into him just as he was thrusting into me, I was falling in love with angry Ryan, he was a fucking powerhouse.

"You want my nut inside you, Nick? I missed making you sloppy. Can I make you a skanky, messy hole?" Ryan asked, his voice was back to the little fuck-machine-cherub I had always known.

"Shit, yeah!" I replied. "But can we do that later? I want your load in my mouth. I want to taste my little baby soldiers' loads."

Ryan smiled and he and Sam switched positions. It did not take long for Ryan. He was pumping his hips furiously into my mouth, meeting no resistance just slurping and gargling sounds and these were his favorite sounds. I could feel his cock building a load and I pushed him back so that only his knob was still inside my mouth. I felt every glorious ribbon, every jet, every spurt, I tasted the entire load. I tasted of Ryan, of seawater and herbs, a hint of sweetness, the texture was creamy and there was so much of it I had to swallow several times to get it all down. I was cleaning up the last of it when Sam returned and pushed Ryan out of the way.

"Here, daddy pussy," he said, shoving his cock deep in my throat, "I got a load for you too, no sense in letting you get malnourished. Tell me what I had for breakfast, and I will suck your dick tomorrow night."

My eyes opened wide, and I met Sam's deliciously naughty look. I focused on every stream as it unloaded in my mouth, I rolled it around in my tongue, pulled it across my tastebuds. Sam's dickhead was still getting compressed as I sucked in my cheeks, and he was moaning like a maniac. The extra stimulation of all my cum tasting tactics was driving him crazy and he was rolling up into a ball with my head stuck to his cock at the center of his fetal position.

I let up and started gently running my tongue over his swollen glans, still a lot of stimulation for him just after cumming, but more manageable. I looked up at him after swallowing the last of it, "I taste maple syrup and strawberries."

Ryan let out a howl and started jumping up and down. I reminded him to keep quiet and he continued to whisper howl and jump up and down. He looked so gorgeous, such a wonderful kid. I thought about Robert and knew that if anything happened to this young man, the combined loss would end me. It would be too much joy extinguished all at once if his light were to go out. I hated having those thoughts, they were dark and this was a moment of joy between men. I pushed them aside, determined to not give the universe any more sadness than it had already extracted from me in the days since my return.

I stood up and kissed Sam. I thought it would be a peck but he seemingly forgot about his rule and kissed me back, his mouth opening and his tongue feverishly searching inside mine for traces of his spunk. I understood what he was doing. When we pulled away I asked, "Did you taste it?"

He nodded, "Shit, daddy pussy, you can totally taste it! You missed the breakfast sausages though. They're in there too."

"You're not getting out of this!" Ryan said, "Nick was amazing, and you know he won!"

"Not trying to get out of it, I am just saying I can taste the sausages too, I probably would have let Nick fuck me if he'd guessed that too," he replied.

I smiled and as they were dressing, I poured each of us a shot.

"To Robert," I lifted my glass. For the first time, I was able to smile and say his name.

"To Mullins," they said in unison.

The three of us sat back on my bed and I asked Ryan again about going fishing, "So how exactly does it work? Are you out there spreading your ass with the curtain open."

Sam began to laugh, "Daddy pussy, you were hilarious that first time, I mean, I've seen Port-au-Prince hookers with more restraint! Ha ha ha! You were ready to start stripping at the Lucky Horse next to the gas station, that's how classy you looked!"

He was rolling around on the floor, mocking my excellent seduction skills. "I was alluring and sexy," I corrected him, indignant at his characterization.

"You were cheap and desperate, practically shoving the toilet brush up your ass!" Sam was really enjoying humiliating me. Perhaps I was a little forward. I had spread my ass and stuck it out into the air like a Kardashian on the first day at the base.

"Well, you're going to suck my cock tonight," was my weak reply, it did not stop Sam from enjoying himself at my expense.

Ryan was laughing too, but he was a little more understanding. "Nah, I literally just shower like always, nothing special. I just leave the curtain open."