All Comments on 'Shrinking Violet'

Wow you need an editor bad. The story totaly sucked.

Thanks for the effort.

Predictable, boring, over the top.

what a waste of ink.

Well written, but no emotions, a story with people do bad things and feel no guilt...

"Well written, but no emotions, a story with people do bad things and feel no guilt." That is almost the definition of poorly written!

Interesting story. Jim MUST NOT remarry her! I think the true story remained in the Author's brain. How does he think the future life of this family. This man is a very good Dad candidate for single woman who hunt for good father-husband candidates.

If they did not remarry and August became older he could find such younger wife candidate..........The true romantic revenge.

Duna

Readers should have seen what was going to happen to this stupid woman. An example of the 'look-at-me' celebrity culture for people who cannot think for themselves.

A couple of comments on Vi's speech. Again ought to be aggin. Meself is mesel' or mesenn and A Hairdresser is, of course, an 'airdresser.

Interesting to say the least.

1. Please learn to write.

2. Get rid of the numbers.

3. Learn punctuation!

Trying to write spoken slang. Since there is no accepted spellin' for slang, the reader has to be familiar with the slang to 'stand what your characters are sayn'. Appreciate your effort, but trying to decipher the slang makes reading and enjoying the story very difficult. Also, you could write the sequel where Rosie and Jim finally hookup and start their own family, but I think that's understood. Several options what to do with Vi, but does anyone really care about that stupid selfish cow? Probably not a slut, since she slept with Darren just once, and probably had plenty of offers while touring. I would choose Vi becoming housekeeper/nanny with Rosie becoming wife, but I'm a softie. Thanks for the effort.

All I can say is that this story, wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be when I started reading it. but all-in-all it really wasn't a bad story. A bit hard to try and figure out some of what I'm sure was suppose to be an attempt at using some sort of slang words. but as I said not to bad of a story.

they better have xtra training and mind control. TK U MLJ LV NV

If her folks are sending her money so she can live in a small flat which would leave "her on her own"... why would Jim let her move back in...?

I'd like to say why would he let her move in AT ALL but am guessing he did it for his daughter.

And if Rosie really likes Jim and August why would she not come round all the time like she used to just because her skank of a sister lived there too...? Like Rosie should give a rat's ass what does or does not make Vi happy...?

Incidentally, I assume a "decree nisi" is the "OK, you're no longer married" paperwork...?

It was boring. Found myself skipping through it. But you warned us, so my bad.

Am I the only one who got the end? Rosie doesn't come around right now and Darren guy got drugs planted on him in Thailand by: "blond tart @rosiegee with nice arse, she planted drugs in my bag."

For me. Don't do the ebonics well. Liked the style of the story, but it ended rather softly, without any real resolution.

Thanks for the read.

Yeah, it sucked big time. Well, I mean most of was okay but the REVENGE... you know, the category this story is in, just sucked. To hell with her and her bastard child. Where'd you get your ideas from, Matt Moreau??? Because that fucker knows nothing of revenge. He always screws over the men and makes the women and their lovers the winners in his stories. And then, just when it can't get worse, he makes the victimized men reconcile in the most lamest and wimpiest ways with their ex-spouses to that of a fucked up friendship. No man in real does that crap. We'd rather die than be a part of something that brought us so much pain. Write better next time.

unreadable.

Interesting twist on storytelling. Characters speaking in the vernacular was a nice touch. It's wurkin' class, innit?

Nice exercise, though wouldn't say it worked 100%, but as a first try, it was pretty good.

Keep at it, expand your conceptual continuity! (borrowed from the late great Frank Zappa)

Cheers,

Robert

another faggoty brit cuck.

Good different. Really good dialect, nobody's a superman. As to taking her back? As I read it he was helping her, not necessarily taking her back. This is consistent with his generosity.

Chilley

The author’s initial impression was right. This story format is boring.

Silly atory, made even sillier by dialog. No resolution at end.

British dialogue is a little difficult but can follow. Premise of the story is an interesting one. Story just didn't sell it well. Really seems to make humorous story but does not follow through that way. A redo committing to serious or humorous could make a really good story.

Since hubby actually divorced the cheating slut; does this make him a cuck for allowing her to return home??!! I personally wouldn't want her anywhere near me; especially with a bastard child!!!

Who the fuck gives one about this crap

Absolutely dreadful, hard to read and drivel. You normally write very well but this was shite.

is interesting, and the format is a different way to tell a story, but allowing the adulterous, pregnant sow to move back in? I can't ever see that happening, even as a roommate.

One of the worst stories I've ever read.

I think some of the comments are from people who did not appreciate what you were trying to do. It was an interesting experiment. However, a more traditional story telling might flow more easily.

Not a fan. This is in the revenge section and there was none. Basically it’s a break up and he takes her back. Also feels unfinished.

A swing and a miss. Too lame and weak to even get any traction. Your wife character is just a selfish shrew and slut. You make hubby weak, stupid and just spineless. Awful and ridiculous