All Comments on 'Sister Incest /Multiple Personality Pt. 02'

The writing style for this installment was every bit as bad as the first one. BOTH need to be totally rewritten with a huge amount of PLANNING taken before you write the first word. You need to decide from the beginning whether or not you're going to several first person narratives from each character or a third person perspective and STICK TO THAT ONE METHOD FOR THE ENTIRE STORY. The flipping back and forth is annoying in the extreme. 🙄

Also, because of your poor writing skills, the whole thing with the parents being conveniently out of town for three days felt like it was information thrown in afterwards. It was totally contrived.

Find yourself someone who is willing to be a ghost writer for you and feed your information to them. Let them write this because you’re slaughtering what could be an interesting tale. 🤔 1/5

I think you confused Amy and Alicia. He had sex with Alicia in the first chapter. How does that make her conservative?

I gotta tell ya...not really all that great. But, I give you credit; dealing with a subject like multiple personalities is very a very difficult ask for most anyone. However it can be done. Might I suggest you read the book "Addicted" by Zane. Then attempt this story again. To be done well, I also suggest taking your time. Try to hard to get to the "sizzle" will ruin the "steak." I do hope you try this again. I have faith that you could pen a great one.

So, I love the premise, very hot, loads of potential, and ffs, it’s smut! Please don’t take it too seriously. That said, the writing and grammar were horrendous. Please run it through grammarly. A little planning and you’re golden!