All Comments on 'Sleeping Sister'

Consider an editor. "Ever so slowly, he brought his nose forward until it was just in front of his face." Is his nose movable? At least proof read it multiple times. The rest of the story is good but could have been much better with a bit more back story and more build-up. Keep writing, another chapter perhaps.

This was pretty bad ngl sounds like it was written by a horny virgin that knows nothing about women