Some Things Are Meant to Be

"Man, I didn't know you bought this system. It's one of the very best we've ever sold," he assured me.

I laughed as I handed him his beer and informed him that I hadn't bought it at Audioland.

"Why not," he asked?

"Because, even with Audiomart's discount to salesmen, I could get it for hundreds less through a dealership that loves to undercut Audiomart's prices," I responded. "In fact, I also bought a small bedroom TV there."

"You know you're biting the hand that feeds you, don't you," he said rather critically.

I paused and then told him, "If they paid better, and didn't expect so much for what little they do pay, I might feel bad about it. I don't, however, so let's not go there any further. Drink up and let's enjoy the evening."

Before any more could be said, someone else was knocking on our door. I excused myself to welcome them. Bill started walking toward the kitchen area saying something about giving himself the free tour of our house. I didn't say any more to him as I walked to the door.

It was not long before everyone had arrived. They were all milling around, trying to get familiar with their surroundings. Soon it seemed that everyone was trying to talk over everyone else while they munched on the hors d'oeuvre.

I was glad for the chance to go outside to take care of the frankfurters and burgers on the grill. The noise everyone was making didn't really bother me, however, because I knew they were having a good time and that was the purpose for the party. With the beer flowing, and the byo liquor being freely poured, the party was getting into high gear quickly.

As I stood outside flipping burgers, I happened to look into the window of our kitchen. What I saw surprised me. There was my wife laughing and having a very lively conversation with none other than Bill.

My wife is a great conversationalist, so that didn't surprise me. What did surprise me was that she was having this energetic conversation with a man she had so much as said that she despised not forty-five minutes before. I just shook my head and went back to minding the burgers. It crossed my mind that Bill the Salesman is proving once again that he can win over just about anyone.

With so many guests milling in and out of our house the AC had been turned off and we had opened all the windows. When the meat was ready to serve, I got everyone's attention with my loud, shrill whistle, which could be heard inside as well as outside. Then I announced that the meat was ready and they should come get it.

I stood patiently watching everyone exit our house to line up on the patio. I also noticed as Bill and Colleen walked out that they were still talking. So I looked specifically at her when I again asked for everyone's attention. She didn't seem to notice.

I took the next few moments to tell everyone how glad I was that they had come to share this time together. There was a loud "Here! Here!" from the crowd when I held up my can of beer as a toast to all eighteen people gathered on my patio. Then I gave instructions as to how they should proceed through the line. Finally, I shouted, "Dig in!" and I moved to get out of their way.

*****

Time passed quickly because everyone seemed to be having so much fun getting to know one another. It was 9:33 PM when I looked at the outside clock. "Wow, time has really passed quickly tonight," I said to myself. Everyone had eaten well and, even though the drinking was beginning to concern me, I felt that it had been a good party.

A few of the college couples had just excused themselves, thanked me for our hospitality and headed home. Some of the remaining couples were still dancing to the music playing through my outside speakers. Still others were telling stories about interesting, funny and embarrassing things that had happened in the process of trying to sell electronics to less-than-informed customers. Their stories, and the embellishments thereof, had become a contest to see who could tell the most outrageously humorous story. As is often the case, the first liar didn't have a chance. I was happy to see that Mike and Becky were spending quite a bit of time with each other and interacting as a couple with others.

As I looked around at the different groups I realized that Colleen and Bill were not a part of any of the groups. I had spent the evening taking care of guests, helping out where needed, and trying to interact with as many people as I could so I had not kept tabs on them. When I located Colleen I saw that she was with Bill again. It appeared to me that he was telling her something very interesting because they seemed to be in their own little world. I tried to remember whether or not I had seen them interact with anyone else all evening. I could only recall a couple of times that I saw them apart. By now they were over by the edge of the patio by themselves, so I decided to go over.

As I approached, apprehension welled up inside me because, as if on signal, they stopped talking to each other and Colleen abruptly turned and asked me, "How's it going, Ed?"

I thought to myself, "That's a rather odd question." I knew she hadn't seen me coming so I presumed that Bill had warned her. I responded a bit sarcastically, "That's my question for you guys. What's happening in your small circle of friends?"

"Oh, nothing much," Colleen replied. "Bill was just telling me about his life in South Africa, and about his experiences while in medical school. In spite of what you've told me about him, I think he's a very interesting guy, Ed." They both chuckled at her brashness. Bill still hadn't said anything and I just stood there momentarily wondering what would be appropriate for me to say next.

Finally, I said, "Well, I'm glad you find him interesting. What about your other friends, Colleen, don't you find them interesting anymore?" Then I glared directly at her and turned to talk to someone else.

As I turned, I heard Bill ask what I meant by my last remark, and Colleen responded, "I guess he wants me to interact with some of the others."

"That's too bad," said Bill. "What do you want to do?"

I didn't hear the rest of the conversation because I had put too much distance between us by then.

I must admit that I was a bit miffed that my wife had spent the majority of the evening talking to Bill. As I recalled, I had seen them both going into and coming out of the house together one time. I also had seen them a couple of times separately. Other than those times, I couldn't remember seeing them doing anything but talk to one another.

It was obvious to me that there was an attraction between them because no one else had been as important to Colleen during this evening as Bill had been. That made me very curious. After all, some of the people at the party had been in our home before and the women were more than passing friends of Colleen's. It amazed me that she seemed to be rather indifferent to their presence as she continued to talk with Bill. It wasn't long before something happened to really set me off.

At 10:00 PM I suggested that it was time for the party to begin winding down. I offered all who needed it to get a cup and get some black coffee from the kitchen. I also offered to call a taxi for all who didn't feel that they could make it on their own. Only one couple admitted that they couldn't drive, so I asked again. When there were no more takers, I went into the house and dialed a local cab company, gave them my address and told them that a couple needed a ride home. The operator said that a cab was being dispatched even as we were speaking. I thanked him, hung up the phone and walked back out to the patio.

As I exited, I looked around for Colleen again but couldn't find her. When I finally asked, one of the ladies, she said that Colleen had gone inside with Bill while I was on the telephone. I turned and went back inside also.

I found them in the living room by the front door. Bill was holding both of Colleen's hands and I overheard her say, "Thanks so much for coming, Bill. Don't be a stranger. You're welcome to stop in again anytime."

"Anytime," I asked myself? "Does she really mean anytime?" Well, that was really hard to swallow. Colleen had gone from despising him, to holding hands with him, and inviting him to return anytime in one short evening. I could hardly believe it. Bill quickly let go of her hands as I approached them.

"Were you just going to leave without telling me? Some kind of friend you are. Spend the whole evening with my wife and then snub me when you leave." I tried to say it in a jesting manner but I was really pissed at both of them.

"No," Bill lied, "I was going to come find you before I left."

They knew they had been caught committing a breach of etiquette, so I continued, "Sure you were, Billy boy. It certainly sounded like you were saying your final 'goodbyes' when I walked up. Am I wrong?"

"Hey, Sweetheart, don't make a big thing of it," Colleen interrupted. "You were busy and Bill said he needed to go. Maybe you've had a little too much to drink."

"I'm fine," I replied, as I walked away waving my hand in the air. Even though I was bigger than Bill, I didn't intend it to look like I was bullying him or trying to start an altercation before the evening ended, so I walked away, laughing as I went. Eventually everyone left except Becky and Mike.

I didn't want to take the time to delve into what had happened between Colleen and Bill, and I especially didn't want to discuss it in front of Mike and Becky, so I started the difficult task of cleaning up after our guests. There was a horrendous amount of work to do before we could go to sleep.

Mike and I gathered up all the trash inside and outside and stashed it in the garage until it could be picked up on Monday.

Becky pitched in and helped in the kitchen.

During the hour that we spent cleaning, I noticed that Mike and Becky talked as they worked. They brought up funny things that had happened during the evening and I listened intently as they seemed to bond during their conversation.

Colleen, the great conversationalist, hardly said anything. When she is silent it isn't necessarily golden. I could hardly wait to grill her about her evening because I was upset with her. She had rudely blown off her own friends and allowed a single male guest to occupy almost her entire evening. Something was going on and I planned to get to the bottom of it.

CHAPTER FOUR

As the door closed behind Mike and Becky, Colleen turned to me and said, "I do NOT want to talk about anything before going to bed. I am bone tired from all the work you put me through and I am in no mood to discuss anything you might have on your mind. Goodnight!"

Wow! What a bold announcement. I wasn't going to take that from her. She wasn't going to treat our friends like she had without explaining why.

As she turned to walk away I could not resist asking, "You spend damn near four hours with another man and you cannot take a few minutes to tell me what's going on? When will be a good time for you?"

"I don't know," she responded. "Maybe never the way I feel now."

"Oh, we will talk about things, and it will be sooner rather than later," I retorted, "because I have questions galore, including some about how you could blatantly chose to ignore your many friends to spend the majority of this evening talking to a man you as much as said you despised when he arrived."

Tired or not, I had thrown down the gauntlet and her temper took over in self-defense.

"You want to know why I enjoyed him so much? Isn't that what you're really asking? Okay, I'll tell you. I found him to be a unique and interesting gentleman, totally unlike the person you made him out to be. He has a great sense of humor. He's intelligent, well traveled, and has many interests. We talked about life and real feelings. He told me about his life and I shared with him about mine. We talked about my dreams and about what I had once wanted to accomplish. I even asked for his advice on several matters. Bill is guy who is sensitive and tuned into those around him and he was very helpful. We also talked about my disappointments, and that brings me around to you and me.

All you and I talk about are your problems at work and how much time you have to spend just to keep your job. You constantly harp on your lack of sales, the petty little problems you deal with at the store, and how little money you're going to make this week and the next. I am beginning to find it hard to see you as anything but a failure. Sure, you won a few sales contests, but you are not supporting the family as you should and you don't seem to care. You could go back into teaching, but you won't, and I don't understand that about you.

Yes, I enjoyed Bill because talking with someone about something different for a change was refreshing. It helped me see the world from someone else's perspective. There's a lot more I could say but I won't. Suffice it to say, I had a wonderful evening up to a few minutes ago and I damn sure don't want you ruining what's left of it for me!

Now! Aren't you glad you poked me with your sharp little stick? You didn't expect all that to spill out, did you? Well, you asked for it! Goodnight!"

With that she turned and began walking up the stairs to our bedroom.

I stood there stunned speechless! She may as well have said, "I met someone tonight who is everything you aren't and he pleases me a lot more than you," because that's what it sounded like to me. On the other hand, she virtually said my companionship and hard work was of no value. It was all very disarming.

I seldom have regrets but this is one time that I regretted inviting Bill into my home. At this point I saw him as a threat. He had become an interloper who had invaded the sanctity of my marriage. I have never wanted to kill anyone before, but the thought of seeing Bill in a casket crossed my mind. I wanted to strike out at him in the worst way. On a more rational note, I knew that I needed to get my head screwed on straight before it was too late and I hurt someone. Intuitively I knew that Bill reframed her thinking because none of this would have happened six hours ago.

I walked throughout the house and turned out the lights before going upstairs to our bedroom. Colleen was running the water in the bathroom so she didn't hear me come in or leave. I got my pajamas out of the chest and a change of clothing out of the closet for tomorrow. I walked out of our bedroom and went into the guest bedroom.

I wondered if Colleen might come check on me but she didn't. I really wasn't surprised.

I lay in bed trying to figure out what had gotten into her? Why would she bring up the things she did and, seemingly, turn against me? I could only assume that Bill was somehow the impetus that drove her to say the things she had said. He had to have been involved in tripping something inside her. Why did I suddenly feel like the enemy?

It was obvious to me that Bill must have used his skills to qualify Colleen as an unhappy woman, married to someone who wasn't meeting her needs. He obviously had taken advantage of her unhappiness, as interlopers often do. For the first time in my married life, I became fearful of losing her.

Sleep was a long time coming that night.

CHAPTER FIVE

When I crawled out of bed Sunday morning I felt like I had never been there. Colleen was still sleeping soundly. I didn't bother making my bed. I dressed and left. I needed coffee and a decent breakfast to get me moving.

Sundays were short days, 12:00 to 5:00 PM, so I knew I would be done by 6:00 PM. I really didn't want to face Colleen tonight because I wasn't convinced of how I wanted to handle what had happened. I didn't understand all that had happened, although I thought I had a good idea, and I didn't want to move in the wrong direction and make things worse. I had to know more before I decided what to do.

I felt like a failure. Bill had brought all those feelings out of her in a few hours; I had failed to fully understand what was going on in her head for well over a year.

One of my greatest concerns was that we might get into a confrontation around the children. I was looking forward to spending time with them tonight and I hoped nothing would happen to mar our time together.

Sunday may have been a short day at the shop, but by the time I locked up it seemed like it had lasted an eternity. When I arrived home I found a note from Colleen saying that she had gone shopping and would pick up the children on her way home. I was pleased that she had considered it important to inform me of her intentions. I was also relieved that there was no immediate need for confrontation. While I waited, I went to the kitchen and found some leftovers from the party to warm up for dinner.

As I sat there eating and drinking a beer, I began to wonder if Colleen had really gone shopping, or could she be meeting Bill somewhere? Suddenly it came to me that I was facing a whole new realm of conscious thought. It had never occurred to me before that Colleen would be capable of such a thing because she was so dogmatic about her code of morality. After last night, however, I had my doubts that she could refuse someone like Bill. I wondered how far she might have gone with Bill had I not been there last night. Furthermore, if he was able to accomplish what he seemingly did in one evening, I wondered what he might be able to accomplish with her if he were given more time.

Just before 7:30 PM the garage door went up and I heard the car pull in. Our two children, Jill and Jack, came running into the house and jumped into my arms. We all hugged and they immediately launched into a conversation about their weekend. I listened intently, but I kept an eye on the door. I wanted to observe Colleen's face as she entered.

When she finally came in, she looked very down. I expected her to be carrying bags of groceries since she said she was going shopping. All she had was a small bag from Walgreen's. I watched as she walked by without looking at me and went to the stairs. She stopped momentarily to tell the children to get their pajamas on and get ready for bed. She also reminded them that tomorrow would be a school day.

Bedtime for the children was 8:30 PM on school nights. She had to get them up at 6:30 AM so she could get them and herself ready for school each day. After they wound down a bit, I told Jill and Jack to obey mother and do as she said. Then I informed them that I would come up and read them a story before they went to sleep. They literally shouted with glee as they jumped off my lap and ran up the stairs.

I followed them a few minutes later and walked down the hallway to their rooms. The door to our bedroom was closed and I didn't bother to open it on the way by. I just went into the children's room and prepared to read the story of their choice. After I finished the story, I tucked them in and we said our goodnights. They didn't even ask about their mother, so I said, "I'll send Mother in to give you your kisses." Jill spoke up first. "Mother isn't feeling well. She told us that on the way home and she asked us not to make too much noise because of her headache. If she is too sick to kiss us, it's okay. We'll get one tomorrow."

Colleen still had not come out of our bedroom, so I gently opened the door to look in. She was sprawled on the bed fully clothed and sound asleep. She looked exhausted. I didn't know what to make of that, but all sorts of scenarios began to play out in my head. I finally shut them down and went downstairs to read and take my mind off my own problems. Reading always helped me to go to sleep and I hoped that tonight would be no different.

I had been reading a novel about a dysfunctional family that was experiencing all kinds of trials in their lives. Unknown to each of the parents was the fact that the other was having an affair. Their two children were also heavily involved sexually with several of their friends, and drugs had become a problem also.