Spirit of a Whore Pt. 02

Trigger Warning: this story contains themes of prostitution that may be difficult or offensive to some readers. All persons depicted are over 18.

"Girl, what is taking you so long in there? You would think after a whole winter holed up in that cabin that you'd be ready to run out of there like someone had set fire to you," Jebediah said.

It was Saturday morning. Merida and Jebediah along with most of the town would be heading to the market. After a long winter everyone would need to stock up on provisions and socialize after being cooped up for months. Merida was assaulted by a wave of nervous nausea at least that was all she hoped it was as she put her hand to her belly. With Jebediah always around it had been difficult to ready herself to flee. She could take only the essentials she needed. The rest of her belongings including those that belonged to her mother Sarah would have to be left behind. Merida put 2 dollars into her basket for immediate use and she'd sewn the rest of her money into the bosom of her dress.

"I'm coming," Merida said as she climbed into the horse-drawn buggy.

"You look as pretty as a daisy," Jebediah said, smiling expectantly.

Merida forced out a smile in return but felt as if her face would crack beneath the strain. Jebediah had been unusually sweet lately. It seemed the more her resolve grew to leave him the kinder he became which made the decisions she needed to make that much harder. It was so easy to choose the path of least resistance. The cabin was the only home she had ever known. It held all the memories of her parents and the life she'd shared with them. Things would have been made so much simpler if she had been physically repulsed by Jebediah but she wasn't and knowing the ways he could manipulate her body made her core hum with desire even when she had ridden him to ecstasy only hours before.

In those moments when sexual desire clouded her senses she brought herself back to reality with the very real possibility that she might be pregnant. Jebediah had discovered her tea in mid February. Now it was April and she had not bled at all in March. The possibility of what that meant was enough to make her blood boil. There was always the devil to pay. Merida had to make a choice and every single one seemed untenable. If she was pregnant and had this baby she was stuck with Jebediah and his power games with every other possibility for her life flushed away in an instant. Caleb wouldn't marry her, no man would. She would be ruined. But even that possibility didn't hurt as much as thoughts of the child she possibly carried. Would it have dark mahogany curls as she did? Would there be a cleft in his or her chin like Jebediah?

Merida was sure they would make a beautiful child but she couldn't afford to think that way. She couldn't afford to think of this baby as a blessing. She had to think of it as something to be rid of and that shamed her more than anything she had done while it simultaneously angered her that Jebediah had willfully put her in this predicament. It wasn't as if women didn't have it hard enough without a man sitting back deliberately trying to sabotage them. That fact was the crux of her decision to escape Jebediah and the reason she had hardened her heart to all of his tenderness and sweet words. Though more than once she had thought to acquiesce and accept a place right by his side.

Jebediah steered the wagon carefully to a stop. "I'm going to take a look at some livestock and buy more feed. You go on and gossip with the ladies and get yourself something pretty. I'll come looking for you in a few hours," he said as he leaned over to kiss her lightly on her cheek. She stamped down the involuntary tingle of desire as his kisses and proximity never failed to send a rush of heat to her lady bits.

Merida climbed carefully out of the buggy amid the hustle and bustle of more than half of Goodwill's residents. She evaded the horses and children, spoke to townspeople, and accepted dozens of condolences. Within her first 30 minutes she was exhausted and her nerves were frayed. She spied Martha who seemed to spot her at the same time. Martha excused herself from the group of women to greet her. The moment Martha's arms wrapped around her, Merida's body began to shake.

"Not here, not here. Let's get to somewhere where we can talk. If you break down here the first and worst thing they can come up with will be all over town by supper. Let's get to the widow." Once at Widow Odelia's they walked to one of the farthest corner shelves. It was then that Martha turned to take a good look at Merida."Child, you've lost so much weight. Has it been terrible? Tell me everything."

"Martha what happened was I wasn't prepared. I wasn't prepared for any of this. The first time I refused Jebediah he threw me out of the cabin into a snowstorm. I don't know if he would have gone through with it but I realized then that I was alone, truly and utterly alone. Jebediah could have let me freeze to death if he'd wanted and let everyone assume I was in a fit of grief and had walked out there on my own. I didn't dare make that mistake again."

"Dear Lord," Martha clucked sympathetically.

"He waited a fortnight after mama died before he asserted himself. He rutted me every day thereafter." Merida couldn't mention the details of how he'd taken her, couldn't mention how she had responded to him or how she had wanted him despite all. "By February he became suspicious that I hadn't conceived and I can't blame him. I'm as regular as clockwork and he was relentless. He became furious demanding to know what I was hiding. That's when he found it, the tea, and got rid of it. I'm five weeks late Martha," Merida confirmed, her tears falling in earnest.

"Jesus, child. Does he know?"

"I think he suspects. He's been softer and full of compliments. He even told me to buy myself something pretty today. Martha I can't go back. Even if on the off chance I'm not with child, I would be soon enough if I stay with Jebediah."

"I don't know what to tell you child. There are ways but most are just old wives tales, more likely to hurt you than the baby."

"I don't want to do that Martha. If I am pregnant, I'd want my child. I just don't want to be trapped with the father. I'm so ashamed, Martha. I let Mama down. I let myself down. I did nothing wrong, yet here I stand. Everything I ever hoped for is in tatters."

"Excuse me," said a smartly dressed woman with long auburn hair and a fitted gown of purple silk. "Forgive me but I couldn't help but overhear a bit of your conversation. Persephone Rowan," she said as she held out her hand. "Pleased to make your acquaintance."

Martha quickly stepped in front of Merida. "She doesn't need to be acquainted or helped by a woman like you."

"If one finds oneself in need of help from the Widow then I am exactly the type of help needed. In either case in such times we of the fairer sex should stick together," Ms. Rowan stated, completely nonplussed by Martha's rebuff.

"Come on Merida. Let's make our purchase and go."

Merida followed Martha dutifully, but couldn't help but to spare a backward glance at Ms. Persephone Rowan.

"Listen, it is time for me and my brood to head back, " Martha said as they exited the Widow's shop.

"What about Caleb?"

"The letter was sent as promised. Here is his response," she said, pulling a folded letter from her bosom. "Read it then burn it. You can't afford for Jebediah to find it."

"Can I please come with you?" Merida asked desperately.

"I wish to God I could but we barely have room Merida. You know this. I'm not a fool. My husband would attempt to demand the same rights as Jebediah if he doesn't deliver you back to Jebediah himself," Martha said matter-of-factly. "Maybe it won't be so bad. You did say he has been sweeter. Children are known to change a man."

Merida and Martha parted. Merida still had a little more time before Jebediah would come looking for her so she decided to get some fabric to sew herself a few dresses. It was there that she again found herself in the company of Ms. Rowan.

"Fancy, we should meet again, Merida isn't it?"

"Yes ma'am."

"You needn't worry Miss. I'm not here to offer you a job, at least not unless you want one. I offer boarding in an area inaccessible from the rest of my business. I heard you've found yourself in a bit of a pickle."

"Why do you want to help me?" Merida asked with suspicion. It was hard to believe a stranger would help when people she had known her entire life were reluctant to do so.

"Like I said, there are some things we women should stick together on and because you intrigue me."

"Why is that? I'm pretty boring, especially to someone as sophisticated as you."

"Why thank you, but I think there is more to you than meets the eye, young Merida."

"Why would you believe that?" Merida asked.

"Because I heard what you said but I also heard what you didn't say."

"What do you mean?" Merida asked, growing quite exasperated with Ms. Rowan's word games.

"Just that you couldn't tell old sanctimonious Martha the whole truth now could you?" Persephone whispered conspiratorially. "You couldn't tell her that your stepfather took your little virgin pussy and you loved it," Ms. Rowan laughed with a wink.

"How did you know?" Merida blurted out, too shocked at how accurately Ms Rowan had guessed her secret.

"Honey, the intimate nature between a man and a woman is my business but truly if you had been grievously abused, you would have led with that. As it stood you said the bare minimum which tells me that there is so much more to say, you just chose not to share."

If this woman, a virtual stranger, could figure out her relationship with Jebediah then surely everyone else in town would as well Merida thought. Her shame would be unbearable.

"Don't worry, I'm not one to judge. That's why people come to women like me, because we are the last to throw stones. This is my last stop. The cost to board is nickel a day, 30 cents per week. All payments are made in advance and if you decide to leave earlier there is no refund. Two meals are provided daily. If you require additional accommodations it will be at cost. Now do we have an accord?" Ms. Rowan asked.

Merida wanted to say no. She didn't fully trust Ms. Rowan but she had nowhere else to go and she needed to make a decision now. Ironically, considering how often Jebediah called her a whore, a whore house was probably the place where Jebediah would least likely look. "Ok, Ms Rowan," Merida said with a large expulsion of breath, "I'll take it."

"Call me Persephone. Come along now, my carriage should be waiting up front."

**********************

Jebediah loaded his purchases on the back of the wagon then climbed up to find Merida, but first he pulled from his pocket the most important purchase of all. In his hand he held a modest silver wedding band. He would ask Merida to be his wife. He felt like a schoolboy, giddy in his excitement to be with her, having never had the opportunity to care for a woman as he had grown to care for her even against his initial intentions.

With Sarah, the marriage had been for practical purposes and though she had upheld her end, Jebediah never got to truly feel like a man with her. And it wasn't until he was in the marriage that he fully understood the impotence he had ignorantly signed himself into. He tried to compensate in sexual matters but Sarah was not like her daughter. Sarah submitted to sex. She endured sex. Sarah never turned him away and she enjoyed the act but it was almost always grudgingly as if it was something else she'd rather be doing instead. Sarah most certainly never initiated it as Merida often would. As a result, Jebediah never truly felt wanted or desired by her and he hadn't understood how important desire or feeling wanted was between a man and a woman until Merida had shown him.

Initially Jebediah had forced Merida's hand and gained her maidenhead. He never could have imagined the sexual chemistry that existed between them. Her every touch, every kiss somehow felt amplified and magnified in intensity from anything he had ever felt before. He was in a perpetual state of hunger for her. Even now he felt an itch under his skin and he'd only been away from her three short hours. The need only intensified as he thought back to how she had come to him this morning. She had reached under the covers, stroking his cock in her small hands and grasping his head to her full breasts for him to suckle her. And when she finally joined herself to him, her desire soaking the sheets beneath them was almost his undoing. She had clutched him to her, plundering his lips in a kiss as she called his name begging for him to fuck her.

Though he loved watching her above him, her hips undulating sinuously, her breasts moving in concert, he could feel the desperation in her movements and knew because he knew her body as well as his own what she needed from him. He flipped her over onto her back, never breaking their intimate contact. He flexed his hips, anchoring her deeply with every stroke. He could feel her arching her body that hovered on the edge of release. He knew what she needed but he drew it out, telling her outright "Tell me what you need. I won't let you cum until you tell me."

"Please, Papa."

"Tell me what you need, " he said roughly, imploringly as his own release built.

"I need you to say it," Merida said.

"Say what?" He asked feigning ignorance but never ceasing his exploration of her silken heat.

"Call me names. Please," Merida cried out as if in pain, desperate for release.

"My dirty girl needs to cum?" Jebediah asked as he stroked his thumb across Merida's swollen clit. "Look at you. You dirty whore. You would do anything for my cock wouldn't you?" He asked as he slammed into her pussy punctuating each thrust with filthy words to push her over the edge. And even after they had both cum he wasn't done. He loved to fuck her after she had orgasmed when she was sleepy and sated. He would slide his fingers inside her spreading his seed all over her swollen vulva and outer lips. He loved how hungry she was even in her satiated state. He loved how she would rub her pussy, sloppy with their shared excretions against his palm like a bitch in heat. His bitch. Then he would trace her lips with his tongue, teasing her to mate her tongue with his as her hunger to be bred and fucked would eclipse all else.

Jebediah itched to get back to her with a need that was both tender and primal. She had not bled this month, but that was not the reason he clutched the shiny silver band in his palm. He loved her and the realization brought a wave of tenderness both profound and unfamiliar to him. Tonight he would ask her to be his wife. He could hardly wait to get back home to her touch, to her kisses and for the first time in his life home wasn't a plot of land or a building with four walls. Home was her softness. Home was the smell of her hair as he spooned her from behind. Home was her lush heat welcoming him inside of her. Home was Merida.

***********************

Merida was relieved once she was settled in her room. She had spent the entire ride peeking out the window, looking for any sign of Jebediah. Even when she got to her room, she spent hours jumping at every noise. The room was beautiful with a wrought iron bed and a quilt with pink embroidered rosettes. Merida took in its loveliness, noting that it represented the first time she had ever occupied a space of her own. Merida wasn't entirely sure that she liked it.

Merida poured water from a picture by the side of the bed into a basin and washed the day off her body. She would find out later where she could wash her meager belongings. After she had bathed she climbed onto the bed dimming the kerosene lamp to a dull glow at least until she felt more comfortable in her surroundings. She could hear the brothel slowly coming to life downstairs and in the quiet of her room, in the first moments of solitude in nearly five months, Merida wept. She had endured as her mother asked but the price had been more than she had ever thought she would pay and no choice she made would lead to an easy path.

Merida eventually fell asleep after she had received a bowl of stew and bread for supper. It had to have been around 5:00 pm. She ate the meal and left nothing but crumbs behind. She dozed again and when she woke she heard her stomach rumble in protest. It felt strange feeling hungry. She hadn't felt hungry in quite some time as her appetite had been poor for some months now. It was a shocking feeling to have her appetite return. She would find some bread and fruit that she might be able to keep in her room for moments when she was hungry. She walked around her room until she became antsy and decided that she would take the back door and step outside. No sooner had she locked the door behind her than another door further down the corridor opened.

"I wouldn't advise that," Persephone said as she stepped into the hall. "It's about 2:00 am. There are some girls still entertaining. Most of the fellows without the coin have left but may still be hanging about outside. We wouldn't want them to have access to what is not for sale."

"Oh, no of course. I just found myself a little stir crazy and a little hungry, Merida explained "I'm sorry if I disturbed you. I didn't know you stayed up here too," she said as she stepped back into her room.

"No need to apologize. I stay up here mostly but I will entertain from time to time when I have a client with particular tastes," Persephone said. Merida thought it best not to ask what those particular tastes might be lest she fall any further down the rabbit hole.

"I wouldn't mind company if you'd be obliged to join me."

Merida hesitated, though she was longing for any kind of conversation. It had been such a long time since she had someone to just sit and talk with. Long talks reminded her of her mother and the sadness threatened to overwhelm her. It amazed her that she had not cried since the funeral, yet now it seemed like all she was able to do.

"Come on," Persephone said. "I am wide awake and you look like you could use an ear."

Merida entered Persephone's room which on the inside was bigger than her cabin back home. She marveled at all of the clothes and shoes lying about and hung over chairs. There were knick knacks on nearly every surface yet the room seemed more of a treasure trove, a testament to a well traveled and interesting life, rather than a place of ordinary clutter and disarray.

"So I take it your Ma died and you have no other family," Persephone said, ripping the bandage off with no warning and no preamble.

"Yes, my Ma died this past fall just before the first snow."

"My condolences. Losing both your parents as an only child has to be the loneliest, most bereft feeling in the world. Do you play?" Persephone asked as she held up a well worn deck of cards.

"Gin?" Merida asked hopefully as it was the only game she knew.

"Gin it is. Now normally I'd say we make it interesting and play for money but I think we can make it just as interesting and play for secrets. You win, you ask me a secret. I win, I ask you. Deal?"

"Deal," Merida said as Persephone dealt the first hand. Merida won the two hands and learned how Persephone had become a Madam. She was widowed at the age of 26. Hers was a marriage of convenience; however, she had learned to love her husband in her own way. They had been married for 9 years when he passed away at the age of 58. At first Persephone had been horrified at the prospect of navigating the world on her own. Her horror only increased when she had discovered that her husband had left her with a ton of bad debt, hidden by a good name. She had no family to speak of, so she had nothing to do but ramble around in her overly large home while she waited for the debt collectors to throw her out on her ass.