Sprocket 01

Sprocket 01

I'm not sure exactly when I became so curious about certain things, but I know that I have always been called Sprocket due to an odd shaped birth mark on my shoulder. I'm not sure why I was curious about why I wanted to live half of the week as a fem Sprocket, but I've been that since I moved out on my own.

One thing I was never curious about was how hard it was to keep good friend's close. I mean, if you're curious about the best way to chase people away, well, just wear makeup and style your hair when you were born as a boy and just like that, LOL, your life is pretty empty.

Not completely empty, but there hasn't been a gathering at my place for quite some time. A few of them stop by from time to time, but that's usually because I contact them with lame stories. But, if you're curious, it worked once in a while, especially when one of my lame stories involved cash for services rendered. My place might be small, but there is always something to do around here. And I think I own a shovel, but I wasn't the right type of person to use it.

My true lame story "case in point" this time was the need to keep up with the Jones'. Before my time here, the previous owner and the Jones' had a matching flower bed that ran the length of the chain link fence that separated our property, only my side had gone to the weeds and apparently, for several years, which the Jones' made a point to remind me of. And Mr. Jones was kind enough to explain to me exactly what needed to be done. LOL, I was not curious at all about what it took to "turn" all that dirt.

But I was curious if I could hire out one of the guys to turn all that dirt and get the Jones' off my back. And all of a sudden, my lame story turned into a real project and I had a response from Clay. And just like that, after he stopped by to review what he was getting himself into, I was a boss!

LOL, a boss who liked to kick back on the deck and listen to the soothing sounds that his shovel made as it made contact with the chain link fence. I mean, he "clink, clinked" me almost to sleep the first Saturday that he worked. Oh, and by the way, as the good boss, I provided him with a cooler full of ice tea and water. And as the wise boss, I advised him to drink more water than ice tea, because, you know, I care for my employees.

Well, let me tell you that turning dirt for an entire afternoon leaves a person very dirty and with the heat and sun, very sweaty. I don't mean to say "ewe, gross" but that kind of fit the situation. Also, as the good and respectful boss, LOL, I did not make fun of his Hollywood hair that looked much less Hollywood as the sweat became Clay's new hair gel. But I may have been a little curious if he would consider changing his hair style because wet and spikey seemed to work on him, you know, on club nights, maybe.

"Clay, I think you're overheating, so maybe we should call it a day. It doesn't need to be completed all in one day. I mean, the Jones' have been shooting off fireworks just because you started this very dirty and disgusting project."

"Well, Sprocket, I was just going to turn it up to the back fence and then quit for the day or die. Remind me again why I agreed to do this."

"Because you wanted to try out a new hair style, silly. So, it's not like I was snooping or anything, but did I see a clean pair of shorts and a t-shirt on the front seat of your truck? I mean, I was watering near the driveway flowers and they were right there through the truck window."

"Well, yeah, the weather lady told me last night what to expect today like this, so, yeah. Do mind if I change in a few minutes? I can just change in your garage."

"Well, that was good thinking. So, Clay, I'm a little curious, do you always wear movie themed boxer shorts? I mean, they were right there, under the shorts and t-shirt, so I could help to see them."

"Oh, Sprocket, ah, you snuck up on me! Ah, shoot, yeah, I have an assortment of movie themed boxer shorts. Ooh, yeah, another water, thanks."

"Drink it slowly this time. I don't think it's good for you to guzzle it. By the way, I was planning on ordering a pizza for you because you worked so hard today. I'll have it by the time you get out of my shower."

"Ah (guzzle), shower? I'm taking (guzzle) a shower? I don't need (guzzle) to take a shower (guzzle) in you clean (guzzle) bathroom. Changing in the (guzzle) in the garage (guzzle) will be good enough for me, but (guzzle) thanks for the offer (guzzle)."

LOL, cross the arms, kick one bare leg out and let my lightly painted eyes do their thing, right?

"Oh, so I should put them all back in your truck because I already snatched them and ironed them, including your manly little space battle boxers."

"You're impossible! And don't even think about posting that on Chang!"

"No, your childish boxers are safe, but, LOL, I'm posting this one (snap) to show off your new hair style. We'll call it "serial killer in training" or something. Now, brush off all that loose dirt when you're done and use the side door. There will be fresh towels in the laundry room shower."

Unfold arms, retract bare leg, bat eyes and leave him to his dirt, right?

"Geez you look warm, so maybe one more bottle of water before you finish, Clay."

Also, OMG, I should have sprayed him off with the hose, but you know, Mrs. Jones was enjoying the show just a little too much as it was and I wasn't about to juice her up any further with a wet chested Clay.

Ah, conversations that occur inside of one's place when one person is relaxing in the living room and the other person is nervous as hell in the laundry room area, right?

"Um, Sprocket, I'm inside, so, hello?"

"The shower is just to your left, Clay. You'll find the fresh towels."

"Ok then, um, Sprocket, are these my cargo shorts? They look so, um, crisp, not to mention that they smell nice."

"Freshly ironed and scented, Clay."

"Alright then, so, I'll just get to it, I guess."

"Rub a dub, dub, one Clay in the tub, only that bathroom has a shower only."

I think he was trying to tell me that he was nervous, but I kept my distance and left him to his shower. I mean, I snuck into the back bathroom and gathered up his filthy clothes, but I left him alone.

And cheers to the pluming people who made it extremely clear when the shower started and when the shower was shut off. Another soothing sound, I might add.

"Clay, I heard the shower go off, so I started the washer and put your dirty clothes in it."

"Geez! WTF Sprocket, are you just on the other side of the shower curtain??????"

"Oops, I thought we were still talking. So, are you about done in there, Clay?"

"OMFG, what the hell are you doing in here?"

"Fluffing your towels, Clay. What are you doing?"

"Finishing my shower! And what's that noise?"

"It's a personal groomer hair trimmer. I'm fluffing your towels and buzzing the hair trimmer. Clay, I was also curious about that noise you were making in there, Clay?"

"This is insane!"

"Are you coming out, Clay? I'm pretty decent, but I will leave if you want to dry yourself off. Should I leave or count to ten and whip the curtain open?"

"OMG, Sprocket!"

"OK, Clay, I won't whip the shower curtain open. I just thought that you were tired and might need a hand with the drying off part. Clay, I'm curious, do you have, um, a shower hook for the towel right now?"

"Enough, Sprocket."

"I'm just curious, Clay. 1001, 1002, 1003, 1004..."

"OMFG, stop counting, Sprocket!

"OK, Clay, I'll leave you to dry off all alone."

"SOB!"

"You need something, Clay?"

"Vodka! Oh, and that pizza."

Well, lucky for one of us, the freaky little pizza guy was banging on the front door, so if I was curious about what guys look like behind a thin shower curtain, that would wait for another day, not that I was so curious about what Clay looked like fresh out the shower or anything.

"Oh, my, my, look at my favorite customer wearing PJ's at 6pm in the evening. Sprocket baby, give me a kiss and this pizza is on the house honey. I mean, you're all alone tonight, right baby?"

"Or we can go with the standard $27 plus your tip. Besides, I am not alone tonight. There is s stud in my shower as we speak?"

"What? A plumber? Believe me Sprocket, if you're plumbing is backed up, well, I'll snake it out good."

"Hush, Timmy, it's my handyman and he's dirty from head to toe and he's waiting for me to scrub his back and pour shots of vodka down his mouth. So, you're going to have to wait a few days before you take me to that parking spot down by the river and absolutely have your way with me, your dirty way with me."

Slam.

See? That's how a defibrillator works in reverse. I mean, I'm not even sure he ever left my front porch because I had a squeaky clean, flower bed dirt turner to feed in the kitchen. LOL, in my jammies, I guess.

"Pizza is hitting the plate, Clay."

"(you should have whipped the curtain open)."

"Did you say something, Clay?"

"Just clearing my throat, I'm coming (on your ass)."

"No Clay, they don't offer bass as a topping, Clay. It's just a Meat Lover's pizza."

"OK, let's eat (and love my meat)."

"Clay, I'm sorry for being in the shower with you earlier. I just seem to be curious about things lately. Start eating."

"(eat this) it's alright, Sprocket, it was actually, well, it was exciting (not to mention that I'm curious how deep I can get up there). By the way, that was just the first turn. The flower bed still needs to be rough raked and leveled."

"(I would have laid level for you) well, I hope you're still on my payroll then."

"I'll pick it up again in a few days (I should have watched you bend over and pick up my dirty clothes)."

"You mumbling something, Clay (I bent over for 5 damn minutes, fool)?"

"Nope, just talking with my mouth full (full like your mouth should be)."

"Alright Clay, you worked really, really hard today, so I will let you eat (like rock hard in the shower)."

"Hard, hard, hard (hard since you wore those shorts on the deck). Oh, um, Sprocket, I meant to ask you something. Um, so just why in the hell were you in the bathroom with a personal hair groomer in your hand (are taking me that deep)?"

"Oh, Clay, I knew I was starting a sexual situation and just in case things goy out of control and things started to happen really fast, well Clay, I was going to take the to trim you up down there first. You know, before I took you that deep."

"Are you teasing with me, Sprocket?"

"I'm curious about a few things, Clay. And like I just admitted, I was in the bathroom with you to maybe start a sexual situation, to see if you were curious about anything. But, that's all in the past now, right (you're limp now, right)?"

"Well, I think I need to be in shock for a couple of days (I mean I'm going to rock your ass for a couple of days) so, is that alright?"

"Clay, one of the reasons that I'm curious about things is because I don't know about some things, so do whatever you want (OMG, you could have done me, I think). Did you want to come back during the week or wait until next weekend to do that rough raking (I might like it rough)?"

"(Oh, it may get a little rough, Sprocket!)"

"What was that, Clay?"

"Oh, sorry, how about if I come back on Tuesday and work in the cooler evening (I'm scared as hell right now, but so hard)?"

"Well, I'll look forward to it, although it sounds like you won't need a shower if you're going to work in cooler hours as you rake it rough, but I'll keep a few clean towels handy anyways (what the hell have I gotten myself into? He is not limp.)."

Ah, snap, it was exciting as hell, but it's funny how things change after you have a little time to think about the things that make you curious in the first place. However, I started it and I plan to finish it, just like Clay is going to finish turning all that dirt along the fence.

End Sprocket 01